I paced back and forth in the empty staff room, unable to shake out the thought about what Jeremy had asked about. I couldn't understand why he would ask that. I hadn't even told him about my past. Why was he suddenly curious about it? Could he know about my past? But who would tell him? Maybe he was just asking out of curiosity. Maybe it was a strategy to make me open up about my past to him. But luckily, I didn't go with the flow and answered without mentioning about my own past. I looked out of the window and into the football field, zoning out with thoughts.
"Oh, aren't you the doctor? Can I help you with something?" I heard someone at the door and turned to look at the door. I could see the peon's back but not the person he was talking to.
"O-oh y-yeah. N-no I don't need anything. I was just passing by." The other person said and I could hear quick steps as he walked away in a hurry.
The peon entered the room and smiled at me. "Good morning sir. Your desk in the English department room is ready. Let me help you move your things."
I smiled back. "Thank you."
I moved to the English department and settled down. There was another female English teacher and the head of department in the room. I greeted them and introduced myself. They both were friendly and nice. I could get a good vibe from them. The rest of the day was hectic as there was another teacher who was absent and I was his proxy so I had lots of classes that day. That day, I managed to get a little comfortable with the students and it made me happy. They seemed more friendly than the other day. And the day ended well.
Just as I got in the car to leave, my elder sister called.
"Kwanie, are you still at school?" She asked as soon as I picked up.
"Yeah, I am."
"I am so sorry but can you help me? I am on my way to your school to admit my son but there is a sudden accident case and I need to leave in a hurry. Can you help me with his admission? Please."
"What about brother-in-law?"
"He is busy."
"Okay. Okay. Where are you now?"
"Just at the school gate?"
"Okay, I will come get you." I hanged up and got out of the car.
I rushed to the gate and waved at my nephew. His eyes lit up and he ran to me. I pulled him up in my arms.
"Popi, what are you doing here?" He asked.
I smiled at him. "Now on wards, you are gonna study with me." I said.
He gasped. "Really? Mommy never told me that. I thought school's gonna be so boring but not anymore. Yay!" he giggled.
"Kwan, I need to go. Please. I will treat you next time." Naomi grinned sheepishly and walked away in a hurry.
I sighed and set Weini down. I smiled and held his little hand. "Let's go."
He nodded happily.
I took him to the main administrative office and collected a form for admission. I filled it up and went to submit it.
"Um you need to fill his weight and height too." The office member told, reading through the form.
"Oh. I actually don't know his weight or height." I said.
She smiled politely. "You can go to the medical chamber to check it."
I smiled back. "Oh, sure. Thank you." I took little Harry to the medical chamber.
The chamber was empty. The door was wide open but there was no one. I called the administrative block and informed them about it. They asked me to wait for a little longer as the nurses had left but the doctor was in a meeting.
"Popi, what am I going to learn at school?" Weini asked, quietly sitting beside me.
"Well, a lot of new things. You're going to learn to read and write."
"I know how to read and write. Daddy taught me the alphabets."
I smiled. "That's great. You are going to learn beyond that."
His eyes lit up. "Like about the stars?"
I nodded. "Yes yes."
"Yay!" he jumped on his seat. "You will study with me, right?"
I smiled. "Yes of course."
From the corner of my eyes, I saw someone entering the room. It must be the doctor. I turned to him with a smile but who stood in front of me gave me the greatest shock ever. It felt like the world had turned upside down at that moment. My body suddenly felt weak. Kao.
"Hi uncle. I am here to check my weight and height." Weini grinned happily, jumping out of his seat.
Weakly, I got on my feet still staring at him. He was frozen, eyes piercing through me. He had changed. His face had changed, the look in his eyes had changed- something more intense. He seemed familiar and yet unfamiliar. I couldn't make myself utter a single word as my body had shut down completely.
As if it didn't matter, he turned to look at Harry and smiled. "Come with me." He held Weini's hand and took him away. I couldn't focus around me. I sat back down and stared the at floor. Was it really happening? Was it really him? After all these years? I thought I would never see him again but there he was, standing in front of me again. My heart was racing as I couldn't process what was really happening.
"Popi, I am done." Weini came back and pulled my hand. "Let's go."
I looked up at Kao, suddenly a mixture of emotions rushing over me. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to say. He was looking right at me, his face not giving away anything. I stood up. Harry tugged on my hand, dragging me away. With a last look at him, I walked out the door.
The shock was so big that my whole body was quivering unnaturally. I drove back to my place with Weini. Jeremy was waiting for me with pizza. I just thanked him and asked him to take care of Harry for a while and left for my room. I sat on the bed and processed my thoughts. It was definitely Kao. It was him. He looked equally shocked as me. What was going to do? I had so many questions for him. But how would I approach him? What would I tell him? What would I ask him? What was I going to do?
There was a light knock at the door and after a moment, Jeremy walked in.
"Hey, is everything okay?" He asked, taking a seat beside me.
I nodded. "Yeah."
"You look like you have just seen a ghost."
I turned to look at him. I didn't have anything to say.
He looked at me like I had grown two heads. "Was the day so bad that you are so exhausted?"
I gulped down and shook my head. I knew it was getting weird so I smiled hesitantly. "Everything is fine. I am just a little tired."
He didn't seem to buy it. "Well...take rest. I will look after Harry."
"Thanks."
He smiled in concern and left the room.
I took a cold shower and lied down on bed, thinking about Kao. Now that he was finally in front of me, I didn't know what to do. The pain came flooding back to me. Those years of suffering suddenly felt heavier. Now that I knew I would get answers to my questions, it scared me. It scared me so much that for a moment, I decided not to ask him anything. I was learning to live with the pain. What if I asked him and the answers would cause me more pain? How would I handle it? But I wanted to know. If he loved me, then why did he cause me so much of pain and misery?
I woke up in distress. It was hot. I opened my eyes and frowned in the dark. I tried to turn and realized a heavy body was crushing me in his arms.
"Jeremy, move. I am hot." I whispered.
"Hush...everything is fine. Go back to sleep." He mumbled.
I sighed and pushed him away gently only for him to come back and hold me again. "Jeremy!" It was too hot. I kicked him and he yelped in pain.
"Ouch. Seriously? What happened?" He asked, surely wide awake.
I sat up. "It's hot. Did you turn the heater up?"
"Oh, yeah. You were cold."
I sighed in frustration and looked for the remote. I couldn't find it in the dark and turned the lights on. I looked around and still couldn't find it. "Where did you put the remote?"
He sat up and yawned. "I don't remember." he got out of bed and looked around.
I found the remote on the floor and turned the heater off. I sat on the bed and exhaled.
"Sorry. You were actually having a nightmare that's why I held onto you." He apologized and sat beside me.
I frowned. "Nightmare?"
He nodded. "Yeah."
I recollected my memory and realized I had fallen asleep while thinking about Kao. "Weini?"
"Oh. Your sister picked him up in the evening."
"You met my sister?"
He nodded, smiling shyly. "Yeah. She is so cool."
"What did you tell her?"
"I told I am your friend." He grinned.
I shook my head. My stomach grumbled loudly and I placed my hand over it.
"You slept without dinner. Should I make you something?" He asked.
I sighed. "Noodles please."
"On it."
It was midnight and I didn't like eating at midnight but I couldn't help it. I was too hungry. We both sat at the dining, enjoying our midnight meal.
"So, why did you stay over?" I asked.
He blinked. "Um..."
"Now that I see, you have been with me a lot. Don't you have anything good to do?"
He grinned. "I do. But I am taking a break."
I shrugged.
"Umm...so did something happen today?"
"Nope. I was just tired."
"Okay. Hey, are you free this weekend?"
"Why?"
"I want you to meet my uncle..."
"Huh?"
"He really wants to meet you."
My eyebrows shot up in surprise.
"Yeah yeah. I told him about you and he wants to meet you."
I smiled. "Okay, I will clear my schedule." Not that I had any.
I tossed and turned after we went to bed. I just couldn't fall asleep. I was anxious for the next day. What was I going to do?
"You are very restless today." Jeremy mumbled sleepily.
"Oh sorry. I must have woke you up." I apologized quietly.
He moved closer to me and wrapped himself around me. "Sleep before I kiss you."
"Huh?" I frowned.
"I am holding myself back for a long time now. So you better sleep now." He slipped his hand inside my shirt and wrapped his arm around my bare abdomen.
I rolled my eyes. "Fine. Goodnight."
He exhaled and buried his face on my chest. "Goodnight."
I closed my eyes but I just couldn't make myself fall asleep. I wanted to move but with Jeremy wrapped around me like that, I didn't want to wake him up. My body started to feel stiff and I knew I had to move. I turned to the other side carefully.
"Try to sleep Kwan." He mumbled sleepily again.
Shit. He woke up again. "Yup."
He shifted closer to me and started to brush my hair with his fingers. I was surprised for a moment but soon I took a deep breath and exhaled loudly. It was relaxing. I stared at the dark ceiling as my anxiousness slowly faded away and my eyelids turned heavy. I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep comfortably.