Pain.
This was what I woke up feeling.
The pain was so intense it felt like thousands of knives were stabbing my brain.
It felt like every cell inside my head was being crushed.
I lifted my body and placed both hands on my head—this was what I used to do to ease the pain, but it didn't work.
The pain only grew stronger and now spread through my entire body.
It felt like my cells were being hammered and crushed into the ground, and within that pain I could feel something strange inside me.
But I ignored that feeling because of the images starting to appear in my head.
Strange images, like a recorded video tape.
It was like someone else's memory.
I could see myself inside a small closet, and a woman standing in front of me, smiling gently but with fear and worry in her eyes.
Her long black hair and shining silver eyes, tears falling down her face.
The woman gently patted my head and pulled me into her arms as she spoke.
"Raven, my beloved son… promise me you'll stay inside the closet and not make a sound?" she said, tears streaming down her face as she held me tightly with despair and strength.
Her crying was suddenly cut off by the sound of monstrous roars, gunfire, and explosions.
Her face turned pale as she listened. She pulled me away from her and pushed me into the closet.
I wanted to understand what was happening. I felt my emotions collapsing into sadness. I felt like I knew this woman and what she was about to do, but my voice wouldn't come out and my body wouldn't respond.
"Mom… don't go, please," I managed to say before a childish scream full of pain and sorrow escaped me.
"Promise me, Raven, that you will never come out no matter what happens."
Her face was still pale, but she looked into my eyes, trying to force a gentle smile.
"No… please don't go," I screamed again at the woman in front of me, feeling my heart being crushed by emotions.
Suddenly, she reached out and took my hand, smiling brightly.
"Raven, let's make a pinky promise. Promise me you'll never come out, no matter what you hear."
"I won't."
"Promise me, Raven, and I will always be here with you." She pointed at my chest as she spoke.
I could feel she was lying. I could feel the sadness, the tears, and the despair inside me.
But I wanted to believe her. I wanted to trust her.
Slowly, I raised my finger and placed it against hers.
"I promise… Mom."
She smiled, pulled her finger away, and closed the closet door.
I waited… and waited… hoping she would come back and open it again. I wanted to see her again… to see her smile once more.
But deep inside me, there was a bitter feeling telling me that would never happen again.
Hours passed, and the screams had long faded.
I slowly opened the closet door and stepped out, desperately searching for her… my mother.
And when I found her… she was a lifeless body, but a gentle smile was still frozen on her beautiful face.
My breath stopped. I collapsed to my knees in front of her and cried for hours.
The stream of images in my head stopped because of the pain.
I forced myself up and headed to the bathroom. I wanted cold water… something to calm me down.
As I walked unsteadily, the pain in my head grew stronger. When I reached the bathroom door and grabbed the handle, another wave of images hit me.
It was when I killed the man who killed my aunt. I killed him cold-blooded, and I killed his father before him—but I felt nothing.
I was afraid my aunt would hate me if I met her in the afterlife.
The images vanished again as I opened the bathroom door. I stumbled toward the sink and quickly turned on the water.
I raised my hands, letting the cold water hit them, then splashed it on my face. The pain eased slightly.
I opened my eyes and looked at my reflection in the mirror.
Black short hair. Silver eyes. A very handsome face.
But that wasn't me.
And then…
I collapsed