He looked at me for a moment.
Then, finally—
He spoke.
"What time is it?" His voice was forceful and intense, as if he was trying really hard just to talk. He also had a very strong accent. He is a foreigner. He seemed injured, because after he spoke those words, he was breathing harshly, like each breath cost him something.
Upon closer inspection, I saw that his throat was slightly swollen beneath his chin, partially hidden by his robe.
It was a little hard for me to properly understand what he was saying.
"Um… 5:37 pm." He nodded slightly.
I asked, worriedly, "Are you okay, sir?"
He stopped for a bit and said,
"It's nothing to worry about," and started walking as if nothing had happened. I didn't want to interfere and make him uncomfortable, even though something clearly felt off.
I looked at him for a moment and asked, "Are you a priest, sir?"
The moment I asked that, I saw him straighten his back, which had been bent a little, as if it was under some heavy, invisible load.
"A…..Priest? Hah! I guess I used to be."
Did he abandon his faith? That's something rare to see. I saw people online who either changed their faith or completely left it.
But never with my own eyes. Never this close.
Also, at first I assumed from his cloths that he was from a church. A devout Christian. But just now I noticed something interesting. The pendant he is wearing, which is half broken, looked like it's made from silver. But now that I look at it more carefully… it's not a cross at all.
The symbol on the pendant has many points connecting, almost like a web. A strange one. Not natural. I can't make it out properly because only the upper part is left, but even that part feels… indistinguishable in a way I can't explain.
I was curious, so I asked,
"You're not from church, sir?"
He looked at me with a face that had mixed emotions layered over it.
"I am not a Christian, boy" he said, in the same voice. No change in it.
Still, I froze, thinking about whether I had accidentally offended him. I have seen some people who are very sensitive towards their religion. I didn't want to offend someone like that.
He looked at me, gave a little sigh, and said,
"I am not angry, boy."
It made me relax a little. But at the same time, it made me even more curious about his faith. I have never seen a symbol from any faith that resembles even a little bit the pendant he is wearing.
"I don't want to be rude, but can I know your faith, sir?"
He didn't say anything for a few seconds.
The silence felt longer than it should have.
And after some time, he finally said,
"It's no longer my faith. But to appease your curiosity, the religion I used to follow is called TR????????"
The moment I heard those words, my ears started ringing and my head started hurting a little. I couldn't make out what he said. It was a long word. A foreign one. Something that didn't sit right in my head.
Only that it starts with either T or R.
Now that I think about it again… I still can't remember it.
I guess I looked visibly shaken and distraught. I was getting scared. My heart started to beat really fast. It felt like it would come out at this rate.
Suddenly, the priest put his hand on my right shoulder and pressed it slightly.
And a sudden calmness entered my mind.
As if all the worry just… faded.
He said,
"It's fine, boy. Don't force yourself to remember it, and you don't have to be too formal with me," with his voice similar to before, unchanged. Hearing him, I stopped thinking about it.
My mind was weirdly calm.
Too calm.
We walked together for a few minutes and didn't say anything to each other.
More time passed as we walked. The sound of our footsteps felt louder than usual.
But my curiosity was getting the better of me.
I asked, looking straight towards the setting sun in the distance. I gazed at its beauty. I looked around—everything had a slight hue of orange to it. Everything gave a very calm feeling, almost unnatural.
As if I was at peace.
Looking at the beauty of my surroundings, I don't know why, but I teared up a little. It came out of nowhere. I was confused why I was tearing up.
"Why did you leave your faith? You look like a very determined and certain person. I doubt it's something minor."
We were walking slowly, and he was also looking around at the same time. When I asked this, he lifted his face and looked at the sky.
It looked like the clouds were moving towards the sun, as if being pulled by it. The wind was blowing with us, almost helping us walk forward.
Without turning his face, still looking at the sky, he replied,
"I found something I shouldn't have found. My faith, which I followed like a blind and deaf fool, turned out to be completely different from what we were taught at our holy place. I questioned my seniors and then the God I blindly followed. I questioned for truth despite not being ready for it. The answer I got...…..I had been lied to. I left my faith. Now I am just wandering, with no place to reach."
As I watched him say this, his face, which had been absolute until now, finally began to change.
It was filled with sadness. And regret.
He looked like a broken man who doesn't have anything left.
He found something he shouldn't have? A scandal related to his faith? Were they doing something illegal or immoral behind his back? There are places that have been caught doing that.
By the way he talked, he seemed like a very big follower of his faith.
But—
He talked with a god? Is he high? Don't tell me I came across a crackhead.
But… something about him didn't fully fit that thought either.
"But you don't have a place to go? Do you not have a family? If you do, you can go to them. I am sure no one will refuse a good man like you."
This time he looked down again at his shoes and at the ground.
"My faith was my home, and the followers were my family. Everything was taken from me."
I didn't know what to say to him.
He looks like he lost everything.
As we were walking, I realized quite some time had passed. The sun was almost set. I think I already cleared almost half the distance to my home.
We were still walking on the side of the road.
A lot of time had passed, and throughout all that time, not a single vehicle passed by.
Not even one.
What is happening?
A little more distance and I will reach a busy crossroad. Maybe I can ask for a lift back.
A few more minutes, and the sun will set completely.
The priest asked me,
"Where is your destination, boy?"
Now that I noticed, his voice had stabilized a lot. He was not having a hard time talking anymore. He also didn't look like he was in pain. But the accent still remained.
"I am going to the west-most side of the city. That's where I live."
As I said that—
The priest stopped abruptly.
Completely still.
He looked at me, then looked behind him, looking around for a bit, as if searching for something that wasn't there.
Then he said,
"You already have your destination on your mind. You will be fine. This is where we have to say goodbye, boy. It was nice meeting you."
As I was still processing his sudden goodbye, I realized that I don't even know his name. Neither does he know mine.
"Sir, can you at least tell me your name? By the way, my name is Winston, and it was really nice meeting you."
As I said that, I saw his face—it looked like he was in deep thought.
Then he looked back again, still searching for something.
He looked back at me and said,
"Boy, we just met. From this meeting, you know me already. I think you may cross. Remember, Winston—when you move forward, don't look at their eyes and don't look behind. And I think it will be better for you to not know my name. You won't be able to handle it."
While he was talking, I was looking at him with only one thought in my mind.
What is he even talking about?
Is he really a crackhead?
I was confused, and I guess I looked at him a little weirdly because he then took a sigh and said,
"Sigh..... Don't look at me like that. I guess you will be just fine. Brace yourself, boy. And remember, don't try to recall my name after you hear it. My name is Wilfred Barn———"
The moment I heard even the first part of that name, my mind went black.
I couldn't hear anything.
The world started rotating. There was a ringing sound in my ears, like something exploded near me. My vision started spinning uncontrollably.
I fell on my knees.
Saliva dripping out of my mouth.
I went unconscious while sitting.
The moment I became conscious again, I was still on my knees.
My head was hurting badly, as if there was a huge pressure inside it.
Slowly, strength returned to my body.
I saw an old man approaching me with his car.
He was shouting something.
Finally, when I came to my senses, I could understand what he was saying.
"Are you okay, kid!? What happened!? Why are you sitting on the side of the road!? Is everything okay!?"
I tried to say something. It was hard, but finally I said,
"Yeah… I think I am fine."
I am trying my best not to recall the priest's name.
But it feels like I am slowly forgetting it.
As if it's drifting away.
I quickly took out my pen and a page and wrote the name:
[Wilfred]
When I was writing it, my head started hurting again, but it was not as bad as before.
I stood up and asked the old man for help,
"Uncle… can you give me a lift, please?"