Malric Thorn was running for his life again.
Behind him, the park plaza had turned into complete chaos. Feathers flew through the air, rats screeched wildly, and pigeons shouted insults from the top of the central statue.
Traitor! Kill him! Get the human!
Malric gasped for air as he sprinted toward the park exit, his heart pounding violently in his chest.
This… is… too much… he managed to say between ragged breaths.
Suddenly, S.I.M.I.O. appeared in front of his eyes like a cruel reminder of his own stupidity.
Observation: The user is now experiencing the natural consequences of his actions.
Malric kept running, too exhausted to argue properly.
I didn't start this!
Technically, you did.
The rat attacked me first!
And you killed its leader with a cactus.
Malric clenched his teeth, frustration boiling inside him.
…When you say it like that, it sounds much worse.
The rats were beginning to spill out of the park. Dozens of them. Maybe more. Malric skidded to a sudden stop when he saw something blocking the path ahead.
A cat.
Black.
Sitting calmly in the middle of the walkway.
Staring straight at him.
Malric breathed heavily, a spark of hope igniting in his chest.
Hello.
The cat said nothing. It simply watched him with an evaluating gaze.
Then another cat appeared. Followed by another. And another.
Malric looked around, surprised.
When did they all get here?
S.I.M.I.O. responded immediately.
Faction detected: Urban Felines. Status: Neutral.
Malric let out a deep sigh of relief.
Thank the universe. Something that doesn't want to kill me.
The black cat tilted its head slightly, as if carefully considering his words.
Malric looked at it seriously.
I always leave food out for you guys.
The cat remained silent. Because of course it couldn't hear him.
S.I.M.I.O. appeared again.
Reminder: You can only hear the thoughts of animals that hate you.
Malric sighed, remembering his new twisted reality.
Right.
Behind him, the sound of hundreds of tiny feet grew louder. The rats were getting closer, advancing like a gray wave. The cats tensed up, their bodies ready for action. One of them hissed.
Malric raised his hands, trying to calm the situation.
Hey, you don't have to get involved.
The black cat took a step forward, its eyes shining with clear determination. At the end of the path, the rats finally appeared, ready for confrontation.
Malric swallowed hard.
I think they're definitely getting involved.
The first rat leaped forward.
And just like that, as if they had been waiting for the signal, the cats attacked.
It was fast. Almost too fast. One cat snatched a rat out of the air. Another slammed one into the ground with graceful precision. A third dove straight into the horde. Malric could only watch in stunned silence.
Wow. They're efficient.
S.I.M.I.O. commented dryly.
Observation: Felines are extremely effective predators against rodents.
Malric crossed his arms, feeling slightly more relaxed.
Yeah. I can see that.
The wave of rats began to hesitate and retreat under the cats' relentless assault. A wall of glowing eyes and sharp claws now stood between Malric and the angry horde.
Malric took a deep breath, tension slowly easing from his shoulders.
That was close.
The blue window appeared instantly.
Interference detected.
Malric frowned at the message.
What now?
S.I.M.I.O. replied in its usual neutral tone.
The felines are reducing the difficulty of the scenario.
Malric raised his hands in disbelief.
That's called helping!
That's called sabotaging the experiment.
Malric sighed, frustrated by his system's twisted logic.
Seriously?
The screen changed, and new text appeared slowly.
System adjustment activated.
Malric frowned, completely unaware of the nightmare that was coming.
I don't like how that sounds.
The text continued.
If the felines continue cooperating with the user… hostility from the Feline faction will increase.
Malric's eyes widened in horror.
What?! They're helping me!
S.I.M.I.O. responded calmly.
Exactly.
Malric buried his face in his hands, feeling the world collapse around him.
You are the worst system in history.
Thank you.
The screen changed again.
New skill unlocked.
Malric blinked, suddenly intrigued.
Now what?
The text appeared.
Improvised Claws Lv. 1 You can extend your nails up to 3 centimeters.
Malric stared at his hands in disbelief.
…What?
He tried activating it. His nails grew longer, small and slightly curved, exactly three centimeters.
Malric raised an eyebrow.
This is…
Ridiculous, S.I.M.I.O. finished sarcastically.
Technically, you can now fight.
Like a very small cat.
A rat tried to slip past the cats. Malric reacted on pure instinct, jumping forward and swiping with his new claws. The rat squealed and fell to the ground. Malric looked at his hand, stunned.
…It actually worked.
S.I.M.I.O. spoke.
Observation: The user has discovered his natural weapons.
Malric looked around at the battlefield. The rats were finally retreating, disappearing back into the sewers, while the cats stood firm, guarding the area.
The war was over.
Malric took a deep breath, feeling unexpected relief wash over him.
Well… that's finally done.
The blue window appeared once more.
Condition detected.
Malric frowned, already bracing himself.
What condition?
The system wrote slowly.
The user has interacted with three distinct animal factions.
Malric raised an eyebrow, mildly curious.
Three?
S.I.M.I.O. listed them.
Rats — Hostile Pigeons — Hostile Felines — Neutral
Malric crossed his arms, unimpressed.
Doesn't sound like much of an achievement.
The screen flickered, revealing something new.
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED Accidental Animal Tamer
Condition: Interact with three different animal factions. Reward: You can now understand the thoughts of any animal by activating the skill.
Malric's eyes widened in surprise and confusion.
Wait. So now I can talk to all of them?
Not exactly, S.I.M.I.O. replied.
Malric sighed, knowing his luck couldn't be that good.
Of course.
Animals that hate you will speak to you automatically. For the others, you must activate the skill manually.
Malric turned to the black cat, feeling a spark of curiosity.
Let's test it.
He activated the skill. Suddenly, a calm voice appeared in his mind.
This human thinks too much.
Malric blinked, both confused and amused.
Did you just say that?
The cat looked at him calmly.
Yes.
Malric smiled, feeling that this whole mess might actually become interesting.
It works.
S.I.M.I.O. appeared.
Congratulations. Now you can understand exactly how much the entire animal kingdom hates you.
Malric sighed, overwhelmed by the irony.
You always ruin everything.
A pigeon flew overhead, and Malric clearly heard its thoughts:
Rat killer!
Malric closed his eyes, feeling fate smiling at him in the most twisted way possible.
Yeah. It definitely works.
S.I.M.I.O. spoke calmly.
Observation: The user has become something strange.
Malric raised an eyebrow, expecting the worst.
What thing?
The screen wrote slowly.
A human accepted by cats… hated by rats… and hunted by pigeons.
Malric let out a long sigh, feeling trapped in a comedy of errors.
Great. Exactly the reputation I always wanted.
The screen appeared once again.
WARNING.
Malric frowned, a chill running down his spine.
What now?
The text finished writing.
New faction detected: Dogs.
Malric looked toward the street, curiosity stirring. A distant bark echoed through the air like a warning.
The cats lifted their heads, their eyes alert.
The black cat's voice spoke clearly in his mind.
Trouble.