Malric Thorn closed the door of his small apartment and leaned against it for a moment, letting out a long, tired breath. The familiar silence of the one-room unit wrapped around him like a worn blanket. A scratched wooden table, an old couch with sinking cushions, a tiny kitchenette, and a bed pushed against the wall made up his entire world. It wasn't much, but after the absolute madness of the day, it felt like the only safe place left.
He tossed his keys onto the table with a soft clink and walked straight to the couch, dropping onto it heavily. The exhaustion finally caught up to him, pressing down on his shoulders like a physical weight.
Today was ridiculous, he muttered, closing his eyes.
Confirmed, S.I.M.I.O. replied without missing a beat.
Malric stared blankly at the ceiling, replaying the events in his mind.
Rats chasing him through the park. Pigeons turning against him. Cats abandoning him. Dogs kicking him out of their territory. A random thief with a knife. And then being forced to jump twenty times in the middle of the street like some kind of lunatic.
And aerobic exercise, the System added dryly.
Please dont remind me about the jumping part.
It was a perfectly reasonable basic mobility test.
Malric groaned and rubbed his face with both hands.
Sure it was.
After a few minutes of lying there, hunger started to win over fatigue. He forced himself up and shuffled to the kitchen. Opening the fridge revealed very few options: two cans of soda and a leftover slice of cold pizza from two days ago. With a resigned shrug, he grabbed the pizza.
Dinner of champions, he said sarcastically before taking a large bite.
Nutritionally questionable, S.I.M.I.O. commented in its usual critical tone.
Shut up and let me eat in peace.
Once he finished the cold pizza, Malric moved to his bed and collapsed onto the mattress. The springs creaked loudly under his weight.
Tomorrow will definitely be calmer, he mumbled into the pillow.
Probability: low, the System responded almost immediately.
Thanks for the vote of confidence. Really uplifting.
He closed his eyes, trying to push away the chaotic memories of the day. The System appearing out of nowhere, the swarm of mutant rats, the absurd war between pigeons and rodents, the cats leaving him to fend for himself, the thief incident, and that humiliating jumping mission. His mind refused to quiet down at first, but exhaustion eventually won the battle.
Malric Thorn fell into a deep sleep.
When he opened his eyes again, he was no longer in his tiny apartment.
He stood in the center of a vast, monumental plaza filled with thousands of cheering people. Giant screens and cameras surrounded the square, all displaying his face with bright golden letters that read HERO NUMBER 1. The crowd chanted his name with fervent passion.
MALRIC! MALRIC! NUMBER ONE HERO!
Malric blinked several times, trying to understand what was happening.
A journalist suddenly appeared right in front of him, shoving a microphone toward his face with excitement.
Malric Thorn! The worlds number one hero has arrived!
Huge screens showed dramatic footage of him in heroic poses. He could feel an incredible surge of power flowing through every part of his body. His nails shone like polished metal blades, and an overwhelming energy vibrated in his veins. The ground beneath his feet trembled slightly with his presence.
In the distance, a colossal monster hundreds of meters tall emerged, roaring with earth-shaking force and threatening the entire city.
The crowd went completely wild, screaming his name even louder.
Malric felt a wide smile spread across his face. For once in his life, everything finally made sense.
He bent his knees and leaped high into the air, soaring across the sky with effortless grace. He was actually flying. Looking down at the city below filled him with pure exhilaration and wonder.
Okay. This is what proper levitation should feel like.
The giant monster roared again, shaking buildings with its powerful cry. Malric raised his hand confidently.
One punch should do it.
With a single strike, the massive creature exploded into a spectacular cloud of dust and debris.
The entire crowd erupted into thunderous applause and cheers.
HERO! HERO! HERO!
Malric landed gracefully in the middle of the plaza, right in front of dozens of cameras. A reporter rushed forward, voice shaking with admiration.
Malric Thorn! Savior of humanity! How does it feel to be the strongest hero in the world?
Malric grinned, fully enjoying the glory and recognition he had always secretly dreamed about.
Well… I guess it finally worked out.
But just as he was savoring the moment, a dry and very familiar voice cut through the celebration like a cold knife.
Observation.
Malric froze mid-smile.
No. Not now.
The voice continued without any mercy.
The user is currently experiencing a dream simulation of unrealistic superiority and grandeur.
Malric's heroic expression quickly turned into a deep frown as the glorious scene around him began to lose its color and vibrancy.
S.I.M.I.O.
Correct.
This is my dream. Get out of it.
Negative.
Why are you even here?
Because the user is generating highly unrealistic expectations about his future.
I am the number one hero right now!
In a dream, the System reminded him flatly.
Malric groaned in frustration as the cheering crowd started to fade, the giant screens glitched and turned off, and the entire monumental plaza began crumbling into gray dust and shadows.
Come on! Just give me five minutes to enjoy this!
Negative.
You are ruining my perfect moment.
That is part of my designated function.
The dream world continued dissolving rapidly until everything went dark.
Simulation ended.
Malric's eyes snapped open. He was back in his small, quiet apartment, staring at the familiar cracked ceiling above his bed.
He sat up slowly, rubbing his face with both hands.
That was weird, he muttered.
Irregular dream activity detected, S.I.M.I.O. announced.
You were literally inside my dream?
Correct.
That feels incredibly invasive.
A new notification popped up in front of him.
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED.
Malric sighed, already expecting disappointment.
Of course there is one.
The achievement name appeared clearly.
Functional Insomniac.
Condition: Irregular dream activity detected. Reward: Reduced need for sleep.
That actually sounds somewhat useful for once.
Not exactly, the System replied.
The full description expanded on the screen.
Your body can now function with significantly fewer hours of sleep. However, the level of fatigue will remain approximately the same.
Malric stared at the text in silence for several long seconds.
What kind of twisted reward is this?
Technically, you require less sleep.
But I will still feel exhausted anyway?
Correct.
Malric fell back onto the mattress and pulled the pillow over his head in defeat.
This might be the most useless achievement you have given me so far.
There is strong competition for that title.
He let out a tired, muffled laugh from under the pillow.
I am way too exhausted to argue with you tonight.
You do not actually need to sleep.
But I want to sleep.
That choice is optional.
Malric groaned loudly and pressed the pillow harder against his ears.
Just shut up for a while.
A few seconds of blessed silence passed before the System spoke again.
Observation.
What now? Malric asked, voice muffled.
The user frequently dreams of becoming the number one hero.
Malric stayed quiet for a moment, then slowly pulled the pillow away from his face.
Yeah… I guess I do.
That could develop into a rather interesting long-term mission.
Malric narrowed his eyes, feeling a mix of anticipation and genuine concern.
Please do not do that.
Considering it, S.I.M.I.O. replied calmly.
Malric let out one final deep sigh and closed his eyes again, knowing deep down that the cycle of absurdity was far from over.
Great. Just great.