[The production crew really knows how to cut away at the worst moment]
[Camera guy—chicken drumstick revoked!]
[I wanted to see my wifey in her white stockings!]
[Why are we cutting away AGAIN]
[Naruto, then Hanabi, then obviously it's Second Pillar's turn]
[Who even wants to watch Second Pillar?!]
[Whoever asked for Second Pillar earlier—show yourself!]
The danmaku was getting heated. They'd even broken out the punctuation.
The view shifted to the arena stands.
Most of the spectators had collapsed into sleep under the Genjutsu.
"Whoa!"
Sakura dispelled the Genjutsu and looked around in confusion.
But her act of breaking free marked her as a threat to the lurking Sound ninja, and one of them immediately moved to attack her.
A kick sent the Sound ninja flying before he got close.
"You okay?" Sasuke turned around, looking sharp.
"Sasuke-kun, you're so cool… Ah—I'm fine!"
Sakura hurriedly wiped the starry-eyed look off her face.
"Sasuke!" Kakashi ran over. "Naruto left with that Sand ninja. That Sand ninja is…"
Kakashi noticed Sakura.
"…the same as Naruto. I'm assigning you a mission—A-rank. Possibly S-rank depending on difficulty. Find Naruto. If you can team up with him and take down the Sand ninja, good. If not, retreat with him."
Kakashi turned to Sakura. "Your aptitude's not bad. Who are you?"
"Sakura Haruno. She was my classmate at the Academy," Sasuke said.
"Not graduated yet, hm." Kakashi scratched his head.
He'd been about to praise her for dispelling the Genjutsu, but he hadn't expected her to still be an Academy student.
"I—I can help too!" For the chance to be with Sasuke, Sakura was going all in.
[Holy crap—Naruto, you've got a poacher!]
[Holy crap—Hanabi, you've got a poacher!]
[Wait, what's going on with you people?]
[Shipping already? That's insane]
[It's obviously just a side character filling screen time, come on]
[I think this girl is Ino's bestie?]
[Pink-haired background character—she's fine, I guess. Just way too boy-crazy. That face deserves better]
"Cut it out! This is shinobi business!" Sasuke snapped.
Shinobi business.
As in—she wasn't a shinobi.
Sakura felt something slam into her chest.
"Sasuke, go find Shikamaru. Have him round up two more people, then all of you go after Naruto. Shikamaru's got a good head on his shoulders—Hanabi praised him too." Kakashi finished, then turned to Sakura. "You—find somewhere safe to hide."
"…Understood."
Sakura answered quietly, then watched Sasuke's back grow smaller in the distance.
"Shikamaru."
Sasuke went straight to the competitors' platform and kicked the figure sprawled on the floor.
"Tch." Shikamaru gave up the sleeping act and dragged himself upright. "What a drag."
"Save it. We're going after Naruto."
The instant Naruto's name came up, Shikamaru wasn't drowsy anymore.
"Just us?"
"Two more. We need a squad."
"Fine."
The exchange was ruthlessly efficient.
Shikamaru's first pick was Neji. The Byakugan's search capability was the best there was.
"Where are the other Jōnin?" Shikamaru asked.
"Sound ninja have appeared outside too, along with summoned beasts. Konoha's in chaos." Neji said. "My father and the Hyuga clan head are both outside fighting the Sound."
"Mm." Shikamaru rubbed his chin, thinking. "Recon, firepower… Do we have anyone who can heal?"
"Don't worry about that," Sasuke said.
He knew Naruto had powerful self-healing.
"Alright, then one more fighter. Lee—can you guys break his Genjutsu?"
Shikamaru had seen the Neji-versus-Lee match.
And right now, Lee had the highest combat power available.
"Mm… Neji?"
Lee cracked open bleary eyes to find Neji standing right in front of him.
"No time to explain—let's go!"
Neji told Lee.
[No time to explain—get in the car!]
[What car?]
[Fanbox Hanabi's white… (comment deleted)]
[Grass (a type of exclamation), the super mod stepped in]
[What was after that?]
[Unbelievable—first time I've ever seen a danmaku get recalled]
[You think being a super mod means you can do whatever you want? (comment deleted)]
[That's right—super mods really CAN do whatever they want (comment deleted)]
[Suddenly it's quiet in here]
[Massacre, absolute massacre]
[Wait—everywhere else it's one-on-one fights, but Sasuke gets a whole four-man squad? Are you all looking down on Pillar Bro or what?!]
The audience suddenly spotted a plot hole worth roasting.
Meanwhile, once the four-man squad was assembled, Sasuke immediately headed for the exit.
When they reached the outside, Konoha was already in chaos.
Orochimaru had probably anticipated the Sand pulling out, so he'd prepared a backup plan.
—When you got down to it, even in the canon, the entire Konoha Crush had been orchestrated by the Sound.
The scale was smaller than the original, though, and most of the attacks were concentrated around the exam arena.
The Sound ninja were limited in number. Creating confusion was all they could really manage.
"You made it."
The four of them had barely stepped outside when they ran straight into Hanabi.
"Hanabi?!" Shikamaru could have sworn Hanabi was supposed to be up on the rooftop with the Hokage.
"Just a Shadow Clone." Hanabi had left one outside beforehand.
"You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?" Shikamaru saw right through it.
"What's going on?" Sasuke asked.
"It's the Sand. There are no Sand ninja among the attackers, but the Sand's behavior has been suspicious. And the Kazekage attacked the Hokage, yet the Sand on-site didn't lift a finger." Shikamaru said. "The Sound's co-conspirators have to include the Sand—or the Kazekage, at least. But the Sand is staying neutral right now, which means someone talked them down… and among everyone I know, there's only one person who could pull that off."
[Shikamaru: When you see something happening that defies all reason, you can be certain—Hanabi made it happen]
[Now THAT'S the real Director Hanabi, huh 233]
[Who's this "Danzo" the Third Hokage mentioned before? I bet he's another mastermind behind the scenes]
[If Konoha really has someone colluding from the inside, it's gotta be this Danzo]
"Naruto went that way… Well, with Gamabunta making that much noise, you don't really need me to point the way." Hanabi's Shadow Clone stepped aside.
"Let's go!"
Shikamaru didn't waste a second. They took off immediately.
But before the four of them had made it far from Konoha, Neji's expression changed sharply. "Wait—stop!"
"What is it, Neji?" Lee, as Neji's longtime teammate, was already in sync.
"Looks like trouble just showed up."
"I must say, my luck is quite good. It seems I won't have to enter Konoha after all." A figure stood on a nearby tree trunk, eyes fixed on the four-man squad.
Or rather—fixed on Sasuke.
A white-haired man in a kimono, the hem bearing the same insignia as the Sound Four…