Chapter 33: Demanding a Man (Part II)
What did it mean to offend House Lannister?
In Westeros, there is a song widely sung from the King and dukes down to the common folk. Its name is The Rains of Castamere, also known as Tywin's Curse.
The song tells the story of how Tywin Lannister, before becoming Hand of the King, utterly erased House Reyne from Westeros due to their disrespect. In a single war, the Reynes—who also bore a lion as their sigil, also rose to power through gold mines, and were a wealthy, powerful, and flourishing House of the Westerlands—were slaughtered to the last man. From family members to servants and soldiers, anyone with even a slight connection was wiped out, vanishing without a trace. Most fans of the show or readers of the books likely don't even know such a family once existed.
Extirpation of a bloodline—in Westeros, this is a term that exists almost exclusively in legends, a privilege belonging to the high-and-mighty Targaryens who conquered the Seven Kingdoms on dragonback. While legally a liege lord has the right to punish a vassal this way, in the three hundred years since the unification of the Seven Kingdoms, the only ones to actually take it to such an extreme were the Lannisters.
The Lannisters used this war to stabilize their shaky rule over the West and established a fearsome reputation across the continent. Even Aerys Targaryen, later known as the Mad King, was so impressed by Tywin's resolve that he invited him to King's Landing to serve as Hand.
As it turned out, Tywin's ability was indeed sufficient to manage the Seven Kingdoms.
...
Thereafter, when House Farman of Faircastle refused to obey their liege, Lord Tywin simply sent a harper to play this tune in their castle hall, and the house immediately bowed in submission. The Freys used the playing of this song at the Red Wedding as the signal to begin the slaughter, ending Robb Stark's life and cause to its melody. At the wedding of Joffrey I and Margaery Tyrell, under the quiet suggestion of the Queen of Thorns, the song was played repeatedly; the young king's later fate is known to all.
Even toward the end of the war, Edmure Tully, after hearing the song played for him by Jaime Lannister's men, immediately surrendered Riverrun. The melody possessed such a terrifying magic, and the foundation of that magic was the power and iron-fisted methods of House Lannister.
In short, the Lannisters were formidable.
Was there anyone in Westeros who wasn't afraid to offend them? Certainly, including the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch. No matter how powerful or rich the Lannisters were, they couldn't exactly march an army to the Wall. The rains of Castamere? The temperature at the Wall could freeze the strings of a harp, not to mention the place didn't even have a rainy season.
Even if Lord Tywin said these words himself, Mormont could well afford to ignore him, let alone Tyrion acting on borrowed authority. However, while he didn't fear the Lannisters, there was no need to offend the Queen's brother just to prove his bravery. Mormont had long outgrown the age of being competitive; he scratched his head and found a solution.
"It is not that I wish to deny you face, my Lord," the Lord Commander said, cautiously using the formal address. After some thought, he decided to toss the burden to two people even less afraid of the Lannisters. "But Egger is a ranger. In principle, any transfer requires the consent of his direct superior. Furthermore, Maester Aemon has also asked me for this man." He paused and called for his personal steward waiting in the next room: "Go, fetch the First Ranger and the old Maester!"
House Lannister was indeed difficult to offend, but between a Stark in his prime with high spirits and a Targaryen whose kin were all dead and who already had one foot in the grave, was there a duo in the world less afraid of the Lannisters?
Mormont felt inwardly smug about his wit, while Tyrion was so frustrated he could spit blood. This seemingly honest and simple former master of Bear Island was not at all ambiguous when it came to being a sly fox.
...
Castle Black was only so large; the other two leaders of the Watch soon arrived at the Commander's solar. Once Mormont informed them of Tyrion's offer of patronage and the accompanying condition, Benjen Stark immediately turned an unfriendly gaze toward the dwarf.
"Lannister," the First Ranger's tone was even more unpleasant than his expression. "I don't know how the messy infighting and power struggles of you southern nobles work or what the rules are, but I must warn you: if you want to poach men to build your own faction, don't bring those ideas to the North or the Night's Watch!"
"Build a faction?" Tyrion had always been the one making others look bad; he had never been rendered speechless by someone else. At this moment, he hated Mormont with a passion. "You lot of black-clad men have no eye for talent... A clever man of insight like Egger—if I were King, I would make him Hand to manage the Seven Kingdoms!" Since he would never be King, he could afford to talk big. "And you? You want him to go kill Others and hack at wildlings. This is the ultimate waste of talent!"
"Calm yourself, Lord Tyrion," Maester Aemon said with a small, unhurried smile. "It was a mistake on my part and that of the other officers not to notice such talent within the Watch earlier... but now that it has been discovered, we naturally intend to let him play a greater role. In fact, I have already discussed with Benjen that once this patrol concludes, Egger will leave the rangers to serve under me, to assist with tasks that... those who cannot read or do sums cannot handle."
"Tasks those who cannot read or do sums cannot handle?" Tyrion looked incredulous. "Reading letters for you? Or doing the books and counting heads for the Watch? Maester Aemon, if I may be blunt, there is far more this man can do than that!"
"And if I may be blunt, Lannister," Benjen Stark said disdainfully. "The man you intend to take is a sworn ranger. He is a soldier of the Watch in life and a ghost of the Watch in death. No matter how much he can do, it has nothing to do with you."
Tyrion was momentarily speechless. As a southern noble, the affairs of the Watch truly had nothing to do with him, but the Imp was no ordinary man. A spark of inspiration hit him, and he quickly found a rebuttal: "How does it have nothing to do with me? If the Others you constantly speak of truly exist and are about to break through the Wall, that would be the end of the world. Though I am a dwarf, I am still part of humanity. Naturally, I wish for the Night's Watch to be stronger—"
Stark cut him off: "And poaching the clever man you like from Castle Black is your unique way of helping the Night's Watch?"
"Poaching? I want to send him somewhere where he can make a greater contribution to the Watch! Do you know why the defenders of the Wall have declined to this state?" Tyrion countered. "You always believe you are part of an ancient, honorable order, priding yourselves on isolation and refusing to make any changes or communicate with the outside world. Clearly, the times have changed, yet the Watch persists with a mindset and system from hundreds or thousands of years ago. How could it not decline?"
"Oh? Then I would like to hear your advice. How do you think we should reform?" Benjen let out a scornful scoff.
"Do you know what image the Night's Watch has in the eyes of southerners?" Tyrion didn't answer directly but shifted the topic. "Scruffy old men, illiterate, dirty, smelly, and crude, traveling the land to bring back the young, strong criminals and dregs from dungeons to Castle Black. The Wall, in their eyes, is clearly a place that disposes of trash under the guise of protecting the realm."
"Has no one taught you how to mind your tongue?" Fire flickered in Benjen's eyes.
"You and I both know that isn't the truth, but the image you present to the residents and nobles south of the Neck is represented by 'Wandering Crows' like Yoren. Seeing is believing—can you blame them for having a prejudice? I have no ill will toward Yoren, but you know better than I what he looks like. Not everyone has the leisure to travel to the Wall to witness your work!"
Tyrion's logic grew more fluid as he spoke: "Consequently, besides the Northmen who know the Watch is protecting them, the other six kingdoms haven't a clue what you are or what you do. The result is that only the North respects you, only the Northern lords support you, only the North—and perhaps the Vale or the Riverlands—occasionally has a few hot-blooded lads volunteer to join. Everything is your own doing. Since you know well enough to bring more presentable men to Winterfell to meet Eddard Stark, why don't you send presentable men to the South to handle your business?"
Benjen was almost ready to slam the table and rise, but Aemon calmed him. "Lord Tyrion, your words are not wrong, but there are only a few dozen capable mid-to-high-level managers in the Watch, and all have a mountain of affairs to handle. It is truly..."
"To solve the problem, you must find ways to grow the Night's Watch, not clutch one useful man until he suffocates! You are currently drinking poisoned wine to quench your thirst, heading from decline toward extinction! Change or vanish, Maester Aemon—I believe you are the most intelligent man in the Watch. Do you think I have a point?"
"And allowing you to ransom Egger will grow the Watch? We might as well just disband the Night's Watch then!"
"This is not a ransom; he remains a man of the Night's Watch!" Tyrion seized the key point. "And I guarantee that with Egger's eloquence, wit, and insight, the contribution he can make to the Night's Watch once he returns to King's Landing with me will far exceed anything he could do by following Benjen beyond the Wall or acting as an assistant to Maester Aemon!"
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