Intermission
"...But I think this makes everyone, right?" I awkwardly segue. Rem just nods, and begins to set the table - I can't just let her work alone, so I start to assist.
I'm really doing everything I can to dodge talking about her current appearance, huh?
"That's correct," Recorder replies. "In total, Chaldea's forces amount to a mere eight people - ten if we count the dubious Xiang Yu and Shaula, and eleven if I am considered."
"Yeah, that's what it looks like, huh?" I mutter. "So with that in mind, how about we all dig in, and while we're eating we'll do introductions, and go over everything that happened so far - just to make sure everyone's on the same page."
"Makes sense to me," Romani says. "If the rumors aren't going to be a problem, anyway…"
As he says that, a strange creature flies into the room. It's a bird-like thing that looks like it has hands for wings, with a single eyeball drooping down on a stalk where a head might be. In short… "What the heck is that creepy thing-?"
"One of my familiars," Recorder replies. "If you give me some time, I'll use it to set up a bounded field, and make this room at least a sort of safe-point."
"So introductions first, theEEH wait a minute!" With an uncharacteristic speed, my brain catches the oddity here. "I thought you said you couldn't operate the rayshifting equipment, Recorder! Or was it Romani-?"
"No, you're correct in your first assessment," The Caster responds. "My inability to operate the rayshifting equipment… was a falsehood. A logical ruse to cover up the fact that I would be able to dispatch familiars if required. You were, after all, being observed; it was only sensible to avoid tipping my hand. Of course, as to rayshifting things out… it isn't safe. Our enemy is able to interfere with any efforts to pull things off of his little stage. I could probably force a rayshift with my Noble Phantasm, but it might collapse the singularity. If that happens, the demise of the rest of Chaldea's staff will become something unchangeable."
"You've got a Noble Phantasm that can crush an entire singularity on its own!?" Romani blurts out with a mix of excitement and terror.
"This is a special case. Let me set up the bounded field, and I'll elaborate," Recorder says.
"Alright, if that's the case… I'll go first!" Without an ounce of hesitation, I leap onto the table and point at the sky. "The name's Natsuki Subaru! Not only am I clueless, I'm also in charge of Chaldea's A team for some reason!"
Shaula and Rem start clapping, and after a moment, Van Gogh joins in. Does this mean I've finally made it in life?
No, Miyako's disappointed stare has ruined any good feelings I got from it. "Didn't you say that hopping onto tables and posing was the root of all of your high school woes…?" Oh, actually she's worried about me. That might be worse.
"It worked in college, so I figured it would work here!" I reply with a wink, before falling into my chair again.
"Alright, since Master went, I'll go next!" Shaula hops onto the table and strikes a pose. Wait, do I really look like that? "The name's Shaula! Not only am I clueless, I'm also a Noble Phantasm beyond compare!"
"These introductions aren't helping. Actually, I think they're making me more confused," Akuta notes.
"Hey, hey, Micchan, does my pose really look that dumb?" I whisper.
"No. Shaula-san has the body of a supermodel, so her pose looks way better than yours," mercilessly, she destroys my pride forever.
Then, without giving any sign that she heard the complaints, Shaula flops into the chair next to me, loses her balance, and falls backwards, knocking her head on the floor. Is that gonna be alright? She's already missing enough brain cells as it is…
"I think Hinako's probably right," Pepe says. "This style of introduction is going to confuse things, so how about we go by group? The three groups that approached the Tower, and then those who were already in it - that should clear things up a bit more."
"Ah, I guess that'd make sense…" I mutter. "Alright, I'm Natsuki Subaru. I was the last Master of Chaldea for our first two singularities, and most of our third one - we managed to pick up Aesclepius near the end of that one, and that gave us the opportunity to start thawing out injured Masters."
"The first round was experimental, so we started with Beryl," Doctor Romani says, closing his eyes for a moment. "That was my call, and I don't regret it."
"-Anyway, I got pulled into this Singularity in a park near Kichijoji. While I was getting pulled in, I had a meeting with Tezcatlipoca, the Aztec god of the dead - she's apparently using Louis Arneb, an old enemy of mine, as a vessel. I'm still not totally sure if she's an enemy or not, but…"
"I ran into her," Akuta notes. "I'll get into it later, but I sold her my Sirius Light."
Romani's eyes go wide. "You what!?"
"-Well, we'll table her for the 'discussing enemies' section once Recorder's done with his bounded field," I say. "Anyway, after landing, I ran into Micchan - Arima Miyako." I glance at her, sitting very close to my right side - she gives a small wave, but doesn't say anything more. "-She's a childhood frined of mine, so it was a little weird running into her here, but apparently she was spirited away to this place or something. Then Recorder called me up from Chaldea, and he guided us two normal human beings to the tower."
"Um, about that… While I was dreaming, I saw that Tezcatlipoca girl too. She said a bunch of Spanish stuff that went over my head, but I think she might be the one who brought me here. And there was also a Red Tezcatlipoca, who wanted to take over my body, but I beat him up," Miyako says. Oi, that's important!
"When- you mean when you were bleeding out?" I ask, and she nods.
"I'll confirm - it's somewhat irritating that it was obscured before, but Chaldea's systems are now detecting Arima Miyako as a Demi-Servant." Recorder says. "As for her contents - I'm no expert, but I believe it's one of the nameless heroes consumed by [Gluttony]."
…
""HUH!?"" Romani and I shout in sync.
"Ah, yeah. [Demisabanto]. That's what they kept talking about," Miyako says. "What is that, anyway?"
"...I don't even know where to begin," Romani mutters. "Every one of those poor kids Marisbury created behind my back, other than Mash… they died, you know? And then we stumble into another in the wild."
"Well, it can't be helped right now! Let's all keep an eye on Micchan, okay~!" Pepe gives a big wink.
"...Geh," She looks vaguely annoyed that this stranger's used her nickname… but hopefully she'll be okay. "...Well, besides that, the other thing is that Panda-sensei was involved with me being brought here. He sold some kind of 'mythic eyes' to Tezcatlipoca-"
""The [Mystic Eyes of Death Perception],"" Akuta and I say at the same time, and then blink, glancing at each other.
"...I ran into their user earlier. He killed me, that's why I had to sell the Sirius Light in the first place - Tezcatlipoca was able to raise me from the dead in exchange. Oh, and he got Francois Prelati while he was at it. That thing might actually be dead for real, now," Akuta explains.
"But in the first place, it looks like Tezcatlipoca was the one responsible for those Mystic Eyes being present," I mutter. "-Also, I don't follow? I know those eyes impose [Death] upon the target, but why would that permakill Prelati…?"
"They bring about the target's 'Expiration'," Xiang Yu says. "There's no way to circumvent death by regeneration or reincarnation, because those things are also brought to an 'end' by the eyes. That my love required outside help to revive is certification - any method of avoiding death weaker than those of a Zhenren will fail."
"Zhenren? Goodness, you really were holding out on us, Hinako!" Pepe laughs - and then, seeing that Romani and I are clueless, he explains. "She's a kind of elemental. In short you can consider our Hinako something similar to the True Ancestors of the Vampires - heck, she probably would have been just fine if she was outside of the coffins when everything exploded. But you guys froze her, so she wasn't able to regenerate. How's that for a twist of fate?"
"Well, I guess her declaration of a two-thousand year wait had me thinking it might be something on that level…" Romani mutters. "Ah, as for the [Mystic Eyes of Death Perception], I met their user once. Last I heard, Tohno-kun was still hunting after [Depletion Garden] though, so I can't imagine when he had a chance to go meeting Aztec gods…"
"...Onii-chan?" Miyako mutters. "I don't… I don't understand. What's the relationship between Onii-chan and Panda-sensei?"
Yeah. We keep getting hints that the two are connected - I don't remember Miyako's brother well, but I know he wasn't like Nanaya. And yet…
"-Ah, as for [Depletion Garden], that's Yumizuka Satsuki, right?" I ask, just to confirm the pieces that are coming together.
"Seriously, how do you always know the weirdest things, Subaru!? Her civilian name isn't even known! I just heard it from Tohno-kun!" Romani whines.
"-Well, as far as Nanaya Shiki goes, Micchan and I ran into him too. We beat him once, but he sold the eyes back to Tezcatlipoca and came back to life… this freaking revolving door underworld might be a real problem," I say with a slight groan. "Other than that, there was that weird Tengu, Emiya Senpai, and Miyamoto Iori. Iori-san had a Saber Servant too, but we didn't actually get to see them - I'm pretty sure they're both gone now."
"Onii-san, you're for~getting someone," says Meili, and I almost respond - before remembering that, of course, she's just a hallucination.
"...Right. There was also someone else from the other world, but I… dealt with her," I almost puke. "But that's us, I think. Arthur there-"
"Mysterious Heroine X!" She protests.
"-Ecchan, then-"
"Nope, that's the nickname for Mysterious Heroine X Alter." Seriously!?
"I'll just call you MHX at this point!"
"Sure, everyone does," she just nods. But it doesn't feel right to call someone by an acronym, you know!?
I give a big sigh. "...MHX arrived with us, but I don't really know what her deal is. That's pretty much it for us, until Recorder's done with his setup."
"Then how about I go next!" Pepe says, hopping onto the table and striking a more sassy version of my pose. "The name's Scandinvia Peperonciono! Not only am I shameless, I'm also gorgeous beyond compare!" He pulled off my bit flawlessly!?
Flopping back into his chair, the man neatly balances it on the back legs without a hint of effort. "I think you know already, but I'm one of Chaldea's A team - the field work specialist. Our trek seems to have been a bit less exciting than Subaru-chan's, putting aside my little business with Daybit. Oh, on that subject, I don't think the original me is stupid enough to sell his Sirius Light to an Aztec god, but Daybit might be able to plan around it…"
"Yeah, I spoke to 'you' while I was there," Akuta says. "Daybit was undertaking some kind of trials to come back to life, but I'm pretty sure he sold off that wooden halo of his instead of the Sirius Light."
Pepe pulls out a small wooden ring - yeah, that's the one Tezcatlipoca had earlier. "So she's got the real deal… that's probably bad in its own right," the man mutters. "-Anyway, the only other ordeal was our trip to the Hokusai museum."
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry-!" Van Gogh starts apologizing right away. Yeah, that tracks.
"Gogh-chan, did you at least have fun?" Rem asks, grabbing the girl's hands and smiling at her - smooth intervention, Rem!
"Eheh… ehehe…" The painter looks away, blushing a bit. "Yeah. It was a lot of fun. Hokusai-san was thrilling to meet, even if she was just a rumor."
"...She?" Micchan mumbles. "No, come to think of it-"
"Alright, that leaves Akuta-senpai's group, right?" I cut off her train of thought before she can consider that question too much.
"...Yeah. You heard most of it already, though," She answers. "I got here, regenerated, charged up my body to servant levels by sucking blood from some Tengu - and then that [Mystic Eyes of Death Perception] showed up and killed me, so I had to sell my Sirius Light to come back. I wasn't gonna at first, but then I learned that the things you think about get conjured into reality here, so I had to come back and find Xiang Yu-sama."
"Ah, you had a chance for reunion, so you took it…" Shaula nods approvingly.
"A chance? No, stupid. He had to already be there, since I was thinking about him ever since I got here." Akuta says.
"Ah! That makes sense!" Shaula nods. "I always think about Master when I wake up too!"
"When you wake up?" Akuta frowns. "Don't insult me. I think about my Xiang Yu-sama the rest of the day too. When I make my breakfast, it's practice for my reunion with Xiang Yu-sama. When I'm reading, I think about Xiang Yu-sama. When I make lunch, I imagine feeding it to Xiang Yu-sama. When I'm working, my mind is focused on Xiang Yu-sama. When I make dinner, I'm refining Xiang Yu-sama's favorite ingredients. I don't need to sleep, but when I do, I dream about Xiang Yu-sama. And the next day, I do it all again. So it's natural, that if we're in a singularity where thoughts become reality, he would appear."
"This is not such a singularity, Yu Mei-ren. This is a singularity where fears become reality," Recorder interjects.
"...Well, love is scary, right?" Akuta answers.
…Is that how it works?
"My love… truly, your devotion shames my own…" Xiang Yu mutters, pulling her close to him.
"Ahh, Xiang Yu-sama…" Akuta responds.
"Go explode, normies!" MHX shouts.
"...But, if the rest of the groups have gone, that leaves myself and Shaula-sama, right?" Rem asks.
"Ehehehe… Master, do you hear that? I'm a 'sama'!" Shaula says, hugging my arm again as Rem gives a pained smile. No, come to think of it, she hasn't sat down yet - because I've got this idiot to my left and Micchan to my right!
Crap, crap, what the hell do I do? I can't just eject Micchan, she'll cry! But Shaula's impossible to reason with! Is it time for the forbidden 'sit on my lap' move after all?
AS IF I COULD DO THAT!
I just do my best to smile apologetically at her, and Rem closes her eyes, breathing in before continuing.
"...To put it simply, Shaula-sama and Rem are from another world," Rem says. "Subaru-kun visited our world for some reason, and that's why things from our world have followed him into the crisis your world is facing. So… on behalf of the kingdom of Lugunica, Rem is terribly sorry for the difficulties our world has caused you."
"Honey, that's not your fault in the slightest," Pepe says with a shake of the head. "I'm not clear on the details, but it's pretty obvious that at least as far as this world crossing phenomenon goes, it's one of those bizarre supernatural phenomena that nobody's ultimately responsible for."
Well, actually the culprits are pretty obviously Satella and Pandora, but I'm not going to bring it up.
"Yeah, in the first place, most of this stuff is coming from my Witch Factors, I think," I say. "So if anything, it's my fault." Like most things, really.
"No," Rem shakes her head. "Subaru-kun… Subaru-kun is Rem's hero, so she'll defend his innocence until the end."
Miyako's eyes widen slightly, and her gaze rapidly shifts from me to Rem, and then back again, before finally realization dawns on her face. "...Su-kun, did I steal your girlfriend's seat?"
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO ANSWER THAT!?
"Uh, um, that is-" I start to say.
"No, you didn't, Miyako-chan," Rem's gut-wrenching smile doesn't move. "Rem's feelings are unrequited, sadly."
Micchan, don't look at me with that expression screaming 'Are you an idiot? Don't you know you need to take what you can get, you stupid NEET? Not to mention a girl this cute, what the hell is wrong with you!?'
I know. I know already.
The reality, that I do love her, just not quite as much as another girl who isn't here right now - that I, greedily, as the worst of men, turned down Rem for that reason and that reason alone - and that after that point I continued to enjoy the feelings of longing she sent towards me… I will leave unsaid for now.
Silence reigns for a moment - just kidding, Shaula continues to have no tact. "Well, Master belongs to Sat-" I move to cover her mouth, but the absolute moron keeps talking!
"[Puppet Playground]," Recorder's voice rings out, and something in the air shifts.
"-ella after all."
"...What?" Rem's face seems to turn to stone. Such an expression… on Emilia's face, I only saw it once before, and that time was one of the worst loops of all. But, in this precise moment, the greater risk is-!
"Recorder! Did that-!?" I shout.
"I've handled it. My setup was completed just in time - but you really must reign in that 'disciple' of yours, Natsuki Subaru," His voice doesn't come from the communicator. Instead, it's coming from… the center of the dining table? What-? "To summarize Rem's tale - she woke here, the tower unable to consume her due either to a particular exception granted by our enemy, or because she was already 'nameless' by the standards of Gluttony, which had been used as a model in this farcical tower."
"...Hieda-no-Are, how is your voice being transmitted right now?" Romani asks.
"Hmph. Suffice to say, this is a trick that I could only use safely once - not due to risk to myself, but the risk of collapsing the Singularity. As for my introduction - I am the Caster class, though I prefer the title of Recorder. My True Name, such as it is, is Hieda-no-Are. Not only are my records flawless, I am, for this situation, a Servant beyond compare!" His voice echoes, above the center of the table…!
He's doing my bit!? No, really, just how much have I been rubbing off-!?
"Up until this point I have allowed you to labor under the burden of mysteries and delusions. There is no longer any need for such a farce. In this place, within my territory, I shall make clear the truth at last - starting, of course, with the most irritating falsehood of all!" And then, with the sound of snapped fingers, the world shatters.
The walls fall away. Like glass, everything that is of the familiar 'Pleiades Watchtower' is broken apart. I'm still seated - still sitting around a table with everyone else, but the background has changed, like a set being traded out on a stage. I look around, and I can still see - the door leading outside still leads to the watchtower, so why…
"Why is this…?" Romani mutters.
"Why are we in Chaldea's cafeteria!?" Akuta asks.
"The scenario was ridiculous from the start. The majority of Chaldea's staff do not even possess the compatibility to rayshift in the first place. How, then, could they have been pulled into the Singularity to fill out the Pleiades Watchtower's library? The answer is simple!" I look up. Standing there, upon the table, his snapped fingers still raised above his head - Recorder, Hieda-no-Are, in the flesh, continues his speech. "The Tokyo Sub-singularity does not exist! It, too, is a rumor, born of Chaldea's foe! And the identity of that foe is - a sentient Reality Marble, originating from the Atlas Institute, going by the name-!"
Sub Singularity 1 - Transplanted Tower of Sins: Pleiades - Disproven
Arc 4.5 - Blood-stained Nightmare Stage: TATARI - Continue
***
Author's note:
THIS IS A MELTY BLOOD CROSSOVER NOW