The strange thing is…
I laughed today.
For real.
Not the fake kind
I've been giving everyone
for months.
Someone said something stupid,
and for a second
I forgot about you.
Then suddenly
I remembered.
And I felt guilty.
Like moving forward
means betraying
everything we were.
Like if I stop hurting,
maybe it means
you didn't matter enough.
But you did.
You mattered so much
that even healing
feels painful.
Still…
for the first time in a long time,
I saw a version of myself
that looked a little alive again.
And maybe that's not betrayal.
Maybe that's surviving.