Chapter 116: Seito: "Say... what do you think the inside of a Hideyoshi bathroom actually looks like?"
...
High School Class 1-E.
Just as Seito stepped into Class E, Iori Kitahara and Hidenori Tabata blocked his path with expressions of utmost gravity. This bizarre sight left Seito utterly bewildered.
"What's up? What are you two plotting now?"
Iori Kitahara turned to look at Hidenori, giving a heavy, solemn nod. Then, simultaneously, the two of them struck a pose that was painfully familiar to Seito.
"Nico Nico Nii~!" (x2)
Seito: "..."
His mouth twitched uncontrollably as his inner monologue began screaming. Good grief. Have these two become addicted to meme-ing? And Hidenori clearly wasn't even there for the original incident—how did he learn the pose? You really are something else, Iori Kitahara!
With a cold sneer, Seito let his "dead fish eyes" wander.
Iori: "Nico Nico Nii~!"
Hidenori: "Nico Nico Nii~!"
"Die!"
Seito delivered a swift double-slap!
Slap! Slap!
A perfect double-hit. Iori and Hidenori were sent spinning, struggling to remember which way was north.
When he finally recovered, Hidenori adjusted his glasses with a look of mock fury. "Seito, what was that for? Can't you take a joke?!"
Iori chimed in, shouting, "Yeah, exactly! That's a top-tier meme!"
Their shouting gave Seito a massive headache. Suddenly, a thought struck him, and he dragged the two of them to a corner of the classroom.
"Do you two want to become the 'Diplomatic Officers' of our team?"
Diplomatic Officers? A promotion already? Their interest was instantly piqued.
"Tell us more," Iori said, his expression suddenly professional.
"On Friday, the μ's idol group will be performing in the Grand Auditorium. This is a perfect opportunity to train you! If you can be a bit thick-skinned and lean into your 'social butterfly' energy, you'll definitely grab the attention of the entire school!" Seito spoke with absolute sincerity.
Hearing this, Hidenori puffed out his chest. "You're joking! I'm the Little Prince of Social Awkwardness... I mean, Prowess!"
Iori scoffed at the boasting and pulled a certificate out of his pocket. "Take a look at this!"
Seito and Hidenori leaned in to read it.
[Social Prowess Honorary Certificate]
Good grief! He even has a certificate?? Hidenori was stunned.
In response, Seito shot Iori a look of disdain and pulled out his own document. "Look at mine."
[Social Prowess Universal Passage Certificate]
Hidenori: "..." How is yours even more ridiculous?
Seeing it, Iori clasped his hands in respect. "It seems Seito-san's strength is truly formidable."
"I wouldn't go that far," Seito smiled modestly. "I'm not as 'pro' as Kitahara-san."
Hidenori looked at the two certificates and flipped one over. The words "Retail Price: 5 Yen" were printed clearly on the back. His mouth twitched. Of course, they're both idiots.
"Alright, enough of that. Let's get to the point," Hidenori interrupted.
Seito's expression turned serious. "After their performance on Friday, there will be plenty of time left. At that point, you two should lead the brothers from Class E onto the stage. Wear skirts and dance. It'll be the ultimate training for your diplomatic skills."
Iori: "..."
Hidenori: "..."
Dancing in skirts? This...
Instead of immediately arguing, they both looked at Seito with a strange, bashful hesitation.
"This... isn't this a bit much?"
"Yeah, a skirt... that's just too embarrassing!"
Seito looked at them curiously. Wait, do these two actually have a secret hobby for this?
"Don't worry," he added, "I'll be performing too!"
To set the trap for his friends, Seito decided he would have to take the stage himself. As for what he would perform? He'd figure that out later.
Sure enough, hearing that Seito would be on stage, their eyes lit up. If their leader was doing it, what was there to fear? They nodded vigorously.
Iori: "No problem!"
Hidenori: "I'm in!"
"Excellent! I'm going to eat now."
Seito left them feeling quite accomplished. Nothing was more satisfying than pranking your friends. He could already imagine the "social suicide" of the Class E brothers in front of the whole school.
Walking over to Amou kirukiru, Seito pulled up a chair and picked up his chopsticks.
"Eat up. The food's getting a bit cold," Amou reminded him calmly. She had been in such a rush this morning that the bento hadn't been sealed properly.
"No big deal." Seito waved it off and picked up a piece of meat. "It still tastes great."
The two ate together for about ten minutes until the bento was empty. Seito let out a satisfied burp and stood up.
"I'm heading to the restroom."
"Okay," Amou nodded.
At that moment, Tadakuni and Hidenori walked over. "You're going to the restroom too, Seito? Let's go together," Tadakuni said.
"Sure." Seito didn't object and followed them out of Class E.
In the hallway, they passed students strolling by and soon reached the restroom entrance. After finishing their business in the men's room, the three of them stepped back out.
Just as they were about to return to class, Tadakuni sensed something was wrong. He turned back to see Seito and Hidenori standing still at the entrance.
"What's wrong with you two?" Tadakuni was confused. What, did they not get enough to eat and want to... no, that's impossible.
The two didn't answer him. They were staring intensely at the sign on the door right in front of them, their eyes unblinking.
After a moment, Seito spoke without looking away.
"Say... what do you think the inside of a Hideyoshi bathroom actually looks like?"
"I don't know," Hidenori replied, his eyes also fixed forward, "but I'm incredibly curious."
They were staring at the third bathroom option: The Hideyoshi. It was such a unique architectural anomaly that they had no idea what the internal layout could possibly be. Curiosity was eating them alive.
"Should we go catch a 'Hideyoshi' and have them take us in?"
"Seconded!"
With that, the two of them turned simultaneously and marched toward Class D.
...
Thank you for reading.