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Thinking about it that way, Hermione's behavior made perfect sense, and the threat she posed seemed considerably less significant.
"Good." Thanos pocketed the Space Stone, and a genuine smile crossed his face. The expression looked a little strange on those purple, raisin-like features, but genuine nonetheless. "In that case — a pleasure doing business. I'll retrieve the Soul Stone as quickly as possible and deliver it to you, as agreed."
He paused. Then, unable to help himself: "But those remaining stones in your possession..."
Hermione cut him off with a wave of her hand before he could finish.
"Don't even think about trading for the rest," she said, pursing her lips. "I haven't finished studying them yet. And you don't have anything I'd consider worthwhile."
In truth, she simply hadn't finished analyzing them.
She shifted gears.
"That said, once I've thoroughly researched them, they won't be of any use to me anymore. I'll most likely send them back where they came from, or just hide them somewhere random. When that happens, whether you can find them and take them by your own strength will be entirely up to you."
She flashed a mischievous grin.
The corner of Thanos's mouth twitched.
But this arrangement was, without question, the best possible outcome for him. He didn't need to make an enemy of Hermione over the remaining stones right now. He only needed patience. Once she'd finished her "research," he would have his chance to gather them through his own power.
"I agree to this proposal." Thanos nodded, his acceptance complete.
Upon the ruins of Titan, two of the universe's most formidable beings had reached a tentative alliance through the strangest negotiation imaginable.
Hermione laughed inwardly.
A few minor clashes aside, the meeting had gone smoothly enough. Some of that credit belonged to the Purple Raisin himself, he'd kept his manners. If he hadn't, Hermione wouldn't have minded sending him on his way. Permanently.
In her eyes, Thanos wasn't even as threatening as Lucius Malfoy.
To ordinary people, to other races across the universe, Thanos was a symbol of power and destruction, an invincible tyrant. But through the eyes of a witch, his weaknesses were almost embarrassingly obvious.
A pure physical fighter. Didn't matter how strong or how fast he was. If you couldn't land a hit, none of it counted. He was just a Hulk with extra steps.
Leave aside everything else, a single Apparition and he'd be left standing with nothing to do but glare at the air where she used to be.
In the original story, Mantis and Iron Man and the rest of them working in tandem had been enough to pin him down for a good stretch. Put Hermione in that equation instead and the methods available to her were practically endless.
Honestly, even Severus Snape showing up would probably give this cosmic overlord a very bad day.
But he was polite. Unexpectedly, genuinely polite. That had earned him a small measure of goodwill.
Of course, the real reason she'd been so accommodating was that Thanos played a vital role in her future plans, the perfect scapegoat.
Because the Space Stone she'd handed him wasn't the original. It was one she had "refined" herself.
Synthesizing an Infinity Stone required exactly one material: the corresponding energy.
After completely analyzing the Space Stone through the magic book, Hermione had spent weeks using its energy to attempt synthesis. Not long ago, she had finally succeeded, a brand-new Space Stone, fully formed, while the original had been drained completely dry and crumbled to dust.
She had done the same with the Mind Stone.
Now she held two stones of her own creation, each imprinted with her magic. She could call on them at will. She could sense them across the width of the universe.
Her plan was simple.
Collect all six Infinity Stones. Analyze each one. Then let them go.
When Thanos gathered these stones she'd already "studied", when he snapped his fingers and erased half of all life to balance the universe, Hermione would be right there to intercept the massive torrent of Soul Energy from every vanishing soul.
As for the crime of destroying half the universe?
Thanos would carry that willingly. He was practically volunteering.
The smile at the corner of her lips deepened.
"Alright, deal's done, so we'll be on our way." Hermione clapped her hands and glanced back at Yondu and the others. "Yondu. Prepare for departure."
Yondu nodded quickly and signaled his men to haul Quill off the ground, the man was still unconscious.
Hermione walked toward the Dark Aster. Then she paused, as if something had just occurred to her, and turned back.
"Oh, since we're cooperating, I'll throw in one extra piece of information. The Soul Stone you're looking for is on Vormir." She held his gaze. "As for how exactly to obtain it, ask your good daughter Gamora. She should know."
She didn't wait for a response. Leading her group aboard the Dark Aster, she was airborne within moments, a black speck shrinking against the sky until it disappeared entirely.
Thanos was satisfied. He'd obtained an Infinity Stone. His grand design could move forward.
Hermione was satisfied. Thanos would retrieve the Soul Stone for her, and she had her scapegoat in place.
Everyone had a bright future ahead.
---
The Dark Aster.
Hermione settled comfortably into the commander's seat, Ronan's old throne, and felt deeply at peace with the universe.
"Hey, Boss."
Rocket materialized beside her, paws clasped together, wearing the expression of someone who has made a shrewd calculation about which way the wind is blowing.
"This ship is really something! Way better than that hunk of junk we had before. Are we roaming the universe in this from now on?"
Hermione glanced at him and said nothing in particular.
"Oh, and Boss." Rocket remembered something. "Is that purple raisin actually going to go find the Soul Stone for us like a good boy?"
"He will," Hermione said. "Because he has no other choice."
The smile was still on her face when it suddenly froze.
Something important. Something she had forgotten. It surfaced all at once.
"Oh no." She shot up from the seat. "Oh no—"
"What's wrong, Boss?" Rocket startled back.
Yondu and the surrounding Ravagers turned to stare.
Hermione didn't have time to explain. Her figure blurred, twisted, and vanished, leaving behind a roomful of people exchanging baffled looks.
---
Hogwarts.
The sharp smell of potions hung heavy in the air. Cauldrons belched smoke in colors that had no business existing. Severus Snape stood at the front of the classroom, expression dark, sweeping a gaze across his frantically scrambling students that could have flash-frozen water on contact.
The door banged open.
Hermione walked in.
Snape recognized her in an instant. His expression went darker still.
"Miss Granger." His voice was perfectly even. "How gracious of you to return."
Hermione ignored the eyes turning toward her from every direction. She crossed the room and stopped in front of him, guilt flickering across her face for just a moment.
"Professor — the Triwizard Tournament. What stage are we at?"
She'd been having far too much fun out in the universe. Hogwarts had completely slipped her mind.
Snape stared at her.
"It appears," he said, each word precisely placed, "that Miss Granger has been enjoying herself so thoroughly in the company of aliens that she has entirely forgotten she is still a student of this school."
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