"Damn it, I should've waited two more seconds before jumping!"
Deadpool twisted in midair, staring at the helicopter pilot who was now just several meters away. The pilot's face still carried that smug, disbelieving expression.
Big mistake.
Deadpool pulled out his beloved golden Desert Eagle without hesitation.
Bang.
Bang.
Bang.
The cockpit windshield shattered in a spray of glass. Blood splashed across the interior, painting the controls red.
The pilot slumped forward.
Last words: "F***."
Deadpool immediately lost momentum and dropped like a stone.
He hit the ground hard.
Splat.
For a second, he looked like a broken sack of meat tossed onto concrete.
Above, the helicopter wobbled violently.
Inside the escaping transport helicopter, the hatch slid shut.
Silence filled the cabin.
Then—
"F***! F***! F***!!!"
Peyton slammed his rifle down in fury.
L.J. placed a firm hand on his shoulder. "He's a hero."
"Yes!" Peyton's voice cracked. "His name is Deadpool! The superhero Deadpool!"
Jill said nothing.
She covered her face with one hand. Her shoulders trembled slightly. No one needed to see her eyes.
Boom.
The explosion came from behind them.
Huge.
Overwhelming.
Nikolai didn't need confirmation.
He knew what that sound meant.
"Nuclear detonation!" he shouted, gripping the controls tightly. "Hold on!"
He lowered the helicopter's altitude to reduce the immediate impact from the shockwave.
No time to grieve.
No time to mourn.
Reality did not allow it.
---
On the ground below—
Deadpool's body twitched.
Then regenerated.
He stood up, bones snapping back into place, flesh reweaving itself.
Without hurry, he climbed the side of a tall building. When he reached the rooftop, he sat at the edge and crossed his legs like someone waiting for fireworks.
In the distance, a tactical nuclear missile streaked across the sky.
Its trail burned brilliantly.
It was beautiful.
The explosion bloomed over Raccoon City like a second sun.
Blinding white light consumed everything.
Zombies wandering the streets became instant shadows burned into walls.
Glass shattered before the shockwave even arrived. Buildings cracked and groaned.
The roar of destruction swallowed the city whole.
"So beautiful," Deadpool whispered, cupping his face.
He almost sounded sincere.
Such a grand sight.
Too bad there wasn't a girl sitting next to him to share the view.
He didn't escape.
He didn't jump between worlds.
He simply watched.
The light reached him.
And erased him.
---
A few days later.
"…Unverified reports claim a plague outbreak in Raccoon City…"
"…Former Channel Seven reporter Tali Moira alleges the Umbrella Corporation is responsible…"
"…Authorities confirm this is a malicious distortion of facts…"
"…The Raccoon City nuclear power plant suffered an illegal operational accident…"
"…Umbrella Corporation provided timely rescue efforts…"
"…Tali Moira, Jill Valentine, and others are now wanted for spreading dangerous rumors…"
Static.
Signal cut.
Truth buried.
---
Deep below what had once been Raccoon City—
The sewers were dry.
The nuclear heat had evaporated everything.
What remained were crusted layers of foul, powdery filth baked into the tunnels.
A naked, severely burned figure lay face-down in the grime.
Deadpool's eyelids twitched.
Then snapped open.
"Yuck."
He sat up slowly.
"What kind of hellhole is this?"
He sniffed.
Immediately regretted it.
"F***! This smells worse than five bodybuilders fencing in a public restroom during a 40-degree summer day!"
He gagged dramatically.
"This place got nuked. NUKED. How does it still smell this bad? Do sewer workers not have noses?!"
He covered his face.
The smell still seeped through.
With a twitch, he pulled a dagger from his personal space and sliced off a chunk of flesh near his nose.
Then he casually shoved the dagger into his nostril.
Poked around.
"Whether sewer workers have noses doesn't matter," he muttered. "I don't have one right now."
He removed the blade.
Blood dripped.
"Phew. Much better."
Eventually, he climbed toward a distant manhole and pushed it open.
Fresh air.
Sort of.
His nose had already regenerated.
He sniffed himself again.
Instant regret.
"I hate my healing factor."
He looked at the ruins around him.
"Can someone drop two more nukes? I need round two of disinfection."
Then he paused.
An idea struck.
He pulled out a small glass bottle.
Carefully scraped some of the sewer residue from his body.
Sealed it.
Smiled.
"This kind of fragrance shouldn't be enjoyed alone."
Next time Colossus lectured him, he'd toss the bottle.
The reaction would be priceless.
Radiation?
Please.
Colossus was practically made of metal. He'd survive.
Deadpool examined himself.
His burned skin had fully regenerated. The blood vessels in his legs were normal again.
The nuclear baptism had worked.
The T-virus inside him was gone.
He was back to being ordinary Deadpool.
No changes.
…Or were there?
He took a step.
Paused.
Something felt different.
He reached out casually toward a small pebble on the ground.
The pebble trembled.
Then lifted into the air.
Floating.
Drifting toward his hand.
Deadpool blinked.
"I learned it."
He gasped dramatically.
"All Creation Heavenly Pull!"
The pebble dropped.
He stared at his hand.
"What the hell?"
Was the T-virus still there?
He closed his eyes.
Focused inward.
And felt it.
Deep within his body—
A sky-blue sphere of energy rotated slowly.
Around it drifted faint white mist, being absorbed into the sphere.
Growing stronger.
His consciousness brushed against it.
The sphere exploded.
Deadpool's eyes snapped open.
They were blood-red.
Pain tore through him.
His skin stretched violently.
The world seemed to shrink around him.
"No, wait…"
He wasn't shrinking.
He was growing taller.
His hands burned.
Something forced its way out through muscle and flesh.
Metallic shapes glinted.
"Oh no."
His mind raced.
"I'm turning into Wolverine."
He froze mid-thought.
"No, wait. Everyone knows Wolverine is short. Like 1.6 meters. If I turn into him, I should shrink."
His body continued changing.
Bone cracked.
Muscle tightened.
Blades extended from his hands—
But they weren't quite claws.
Not exactly.
The transformation stabilized.
Deadpool stood there, breathing heavily.
Taller.
Stronger.
Different.
He looked down at himself.
Flexed his fingers.
The energy inside him pulsed calmly now, no longer chaotic.
He smirked.
"Well," he muttered, "at least I didn't get shorter."
Then he raised his hand again.
The pebble on the ground lifted smoothly.
This time, it stayed floating.
Deadpool grinned beneath his scarred mask.
"Oh."
"Oh no."
"This is going to be fun."
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