Gulp.
Jun-su Kim barely managed to swallow the food in his mouth and was about to stammer out an apology when,
"It's fine. Don't worry about it. If you make a big deal out of it like I'm some pitiful orphan, it just makes me uncomfortable. Just let it slide."
"Ah, um, haha... Yep."
If there were such a thing as a food chain in human relationships, Ha-rang Lee was definitely his natural predator.
Thinking that, Jun-su felt about ten years older as he went back to eating.
Then it hit him.
Ha-rang was naturally sliding side dishes his way, taking care of him like it was nothing.
"You really look out for others well."
"Ah... It became a habit from taking care of the younger kids at the orphanage."
As a kid, he'd been on the receiving end of that care, and as he grew up, he was the one giving it. Even after leaving the orphanage, the habit stuck, making him look after others.
And while Heavenly Ha-rang might not know it, Ugly Ha-rang had no choice but to develop a diligent, helpful, considerate personality despite his criminal-looking face.
He had to be decent, or there'd be no hope for him at all.
That's why, whenever he ate with others, he'd yield the tasty side dishes or volunteer to man the tongs when grilling meat.
💬 Comments— StarlessSwitch with me, Jun-su! Switch with me!— StarlessI've been a Jun-su fan since his pro days and wanted things to go well for him... but not like this.— StarlessGoddamn, I'm so jealous. If a girl who looks like that waited on me during a meal, I'd have no regrets in life!— StarlessI wouldn't care if it's a girl or not. As long as they look like that, even a guy would be fine. So, Ha-rang, how about me?— StarlessPolice uncle is here!
Seeing the Starless fans' reactions, Jun-su felt a brief swell of pride before plunging back into self-loathing.
No, the other person's a guy. Why am I feeling superior...?
Berating himself like that, Jun-su chimed in.
"Actually, I have a little sister too. I took care of her when she was young, but now that she's grown, she's like my mortal enemy."
"Ahh... I get it. One of the cute orphanage kids I doted on started jerking off to otokonoko stuff one day, and it messed me up."
"Pfft—! Cough, hack! Kek!"
Jun-su, who'd scooped up some soybean paste stew and put it in his mouth, sprayed it everywhere.
He desperately blocked it from hitting the table or Ha-rang, but ended up creating a fountain of stew on the floor.
"S-Sorry..."
Apologizing as he hurriedly wiped it up.
"It's okay. Looks like it went down the wrong pipe. Have some water. I'll clean it."
"Y-Yes..."
His mind was completely blank, his soul seemingly fled.
Jun-su, so out of it that he wiped his mouth with the same tissue he'd used on the floor, dazedly thought, What the hell did I just hear?
An orphanage kid... jerking off to otokonoko as a side dish?
His head ringing, Jun-su stopped midway through wiping his mouth and started frantically dry-wiping his face with tissues.
And it seemed the Starless fans were in a similar state.
💬 Comments— StarlessSpit out my lunch burger. Splattered all over my monitor and keyboard...— StarlessWhat the hell did I just hear?— StarlessHuh... But I kinda get that orphanage kid.— StarlessFor real. If a brotherly sister-figure like Ha-rang was taking care of me up close, even I'd...— StarlessHmm, from what I see, Ha-rang twisted that kid's perfectly normal tastes lol.
Both the viewers and Jin-su felt sympathy and empathy for Ha-rang's orphanage-era younger sibling, whom they'd never even met.
"That's why I've had my own awkward moments with siblings."
Meanwhile, Ha-rang finished wiping the floor and continued.
"If I'd just pretended not to know back then... I was young, and unlike now, my looks were a huge complex, so I was pretty sharp-edged."
This conversation prompted Ha-rang to start spilling his dark past bit by bit.
He'd be streaming in front of people online from now on, so it wouldn't be him getting in trouble if something got exposed, but he decided to air out his past scandals preemptively.
That way, he could avoid tumbling down mid-success like some celebrities.
Plus, a bit of pity might make streaming even easier.
Ha-rang spoke flatly, like it was someone else's story, about how he'd been bullied since elementary school.
In a way, it was someone else's story.
The one who'd chosen suicide at the end of that bullying was Heavenly Ha-rang, not the Ugly Ha-rang sitting here now.
Still, the memories lingered in his body, letting Ugly Ha-rang empathize as if it'd happened to him.
"The worst was middle school. They forced my clothes off to 'check if I was really a boy' and groped me."
Hearing that, Jun-su felt his fist clench involuntarily.
Those fucking bastards—
If the perpetrators were in front of him now, he'd want to beat them senseless. Jun-su got mad like it was his own story.
He'd experienced bullying too, albeit in a different form—as an adult pro gamer, getting "tamed" by the front office for not listening.
If it was that bad for him as an adult, what about middle school?
Jun-su trembled just imagining it.
"I thought about refusing to go to school... But I'm an orphan. I had to study hard just to survive. School was the only place I could build specs, and I couldn't ruin that."
"Ha..."
"Well, at least I didn't get beaten up."
He tried to laugh it off compared to other outcasts who got punched and extorted, but neither the Starless fans nor Jun-su could laugh.
"But... high school girls were the problem. Unlike the boys, they hit me."
"What? Girls bullied you? Why?!"
"Apparently... from what I heard behind my back, they were pissed that a guy was prettier than them."
Some people spend money and time slaving over skincare, while an orphan like him just slaps on cheap lotion and ends up plump and radiant.
A guy being like that felt like a total scam, so they led the group bullying out of jealousy.
Hearing this twisted tale, Jun-su sighed and asked,
"How the hell did you endure it?"
"Honestly..."
Ha-rang gave a bitter smile and told the truth.
"I didn't. It was too much, so I wanted it all to end. I tried to kill myself... but I got scared, and suddenly felt so wronged."
Everything so far was fact, but now he needed to mix in some fabrication.
He couldn't very well say he'd actually taken pills, died, and woken up in a parallel world self.
"I vowed to live well, right in their faces. Ung manly? Girly face? Even if I got called an octopus-armed trash for being more manly than any man, I'd date tons of girls and live as the alpha male everyone envied."
To do that, he forced himself to fix his originally timid, shrinking personality.
Honestly, faking bravado was still hard sometimes.
Thus, Ugly Ha-rang gave justification for his changed personality, in case anyone who knew the old Heavenly Ha-rang found it weird.
"Ah..."
Jun-su, listening quietly like a priest hearing confession, nodded.
A person who'd contemplated suicide had steeled themselves at death's door and come back.
He had no choice but to root for that.
"But guys keep flocking to me, that's the problem."
Feeling the mood get too heavy, Ha-rang lightened his tone.
Honestly, not dinner-table talk.
But if not now, it'd be hard to find the right moment, so he spilled it all and felt refreshed, satisfied.
💬 Comments— StarlessHa-rang, fighting!— StarlessAll you losers who made those gross jokes earlier, reflect on yourselves against someone like this.— StarlessWhat a tough life...
Now, if he could just wrap up these reactions neatly, it'd be perfect.
"Thanks for the support. I've already overcome it. Now I just accept and enjoy this beauty that draws women's jealousy."
This part was 100% sincere.
"With that in mind."
Mwah♡
Ha-rang blew a kiss toward the camera.
"You guys enjoy yourselves without overthinking it too."
The Starless fans melted at that coquettish gesture.
💬 Comments— StarlessMy heart...!⭐ Superchat— Mon-Tue-Wed-Thu-Fri-Gold-Gold-Gold donated ₩100,000Jun-su, give this money to Ha-rang, got it?⭐ Superchat— Crくru-ping Pong donated ₩1,000Thanks for overcoming those hard times and growing up so well. I'm grateful myself.— StarlessTo think someone who acts like that on stream faced bullying bad enough to consider suicide...— StarlessHa-rang, let's get famous. Make those school cafeteria bully trash squirm.— StarlessFor real, make them sweat. What are those bullying ringleaders doing now? They shouldn't sleep easy with legs stretched out.— StarlessI got bullied in school too, so it doesn't feel like someone else's story.— StarlessSorry for the sex joke earlier...! I had no idea about your past.— StarlessBut if I say my heart fluttered seeing that hand kiss amid all this, does that make me a total bad guy?— StarlessYeah, honest bad guy.
Jun-su's brain overloaded, unsure how to react.
A tearjerker story you couldn't hear without crying, capped with a hand kiss.
Should he smile warmly, thinking, "You've overcome it so well you can do that now"? Swoon at how alluring it was? Or pity him, assuming he was crying inside? He didn't know.
But one thing was certain.
"This might sound corny, but thank you for staying alive."
He couldn't explain exactly why he was grateful, but suicide prevention campaigns said even a casual word like that could be huge for someone with dark thoughts.
Suppressing his awkwardness, he said it, and
"Huh?!"
Ha-rang shed a single tear, making Jun-su panic big time.
"Thank you."
This one tear was the lingering emotion Heavenly Ha-rang had left behind.
Wiping it away with his index finger, Ha-rang smiled.
Truly beautiful, thought Jun-su and the Starless fans, unable to hold back their admiration.
Anyway, the meal ended.
Jun-su finished setting things up and started passing on tips for Ha-rang to check if something went wrong during streams.
"Keep this as your default setup and tweak it into your own style bit by bit. Everyone's streaming environment is different, so the best settings vary too."
"Ah, guess I need to study hard."
"No need to overthink it. Necessity is the mother of invention—search online and figure it out step by step."
Recalling his own early streaming days, Jun-su advised.
"Alright, let's test a stream. Did you set up your channel?"
"Yeah, I did."
"Channel name..."
Seeing the Twinkle channel name Ha-rang had created, Jun-su nearly choked.
Male Cam Room.
He got the intent, but no.
As seen with other Twinkle streamers, channel names were usually their streamer alias... but Male Cam Room as an alias?
With heroic effort, Jun-su convinced him to let the Starless fans help name it instead.
"Male Cam Room... Isn't it perfect?"
'La la la, can't hear you.'
Ignoring the grumbling, Jun-su prepared a roulette with Starless suggestions.
And so, Ha-rang's streamer name was born—
"Not Alpha Male, but Pretty Boy? What's that?! No way, I'm not doing it! Alpha Male or Male Cam Room!"
Pretty Boy it was.
Ha-rang threw a tantrum, of course, hating it,
⭐ Superchat— Mon-Tue-Wed-Thu-Fri-Gold-Gold-Gold donated ₩300,000You're doing Pretty Boy, right?!
"I'll do it. Thanks for picking my nickname. From today, I'm your Pretty Boy."
But that tantrum crumbled instantly before the big donation.