Deep Forbidden Forest.
This should have been the nest of Acromantulas, filled with the smell of rotting leaves and death.
But now, the air was thick with the scent of... cumin?
Ivan sat on a luxurious folding chair enhanced by a "Hover Charm," facing an alchemically modified smokeless grill.
Roasting on the spit was a massive, dripping leg of meat.
It wasn't ordinary meat; it was the thigh of the "Ancient Behemoth" Hagrid had just failed to resurrect—actually, a giant mechanical Husky Ivan had modified (because the original meat was too tough and Ivan rejected it).
On a nearby tree.
Sirius Black (Animagus form: big black dog) was hanging upside down from a vine, swaying in the breeze like a wind-dried sausage.
"Woof! Woof!!" (Let me down! I want meat!)
Sirius protested angrily, drool dripping down into the grill below, sizzling into white smoke.
"Don't rush, Big Black." Ivan flipped the meat with his wand and sprinkled a handful of fluorescent chili powder. "This meat needs to be medium-well, or there'll be parasites. You don't want trichinosis, do you?"
At his feet, the "King of Mechanical Huskies," which should have been terrifying, was lying on its back, exposing its titanium alloy belly armor, throat rumbling as Ivan rubbed its iron chin with his foot.
Ignoring the rotating buzzsaw in its mouth, it was just a big dog begging for belly rubs.
Just then, the bushes rustled.
The centaur Firenze walked out with elegant strides.
He had come to warn Hagrid not to play with death (though Hagrid was currently hiding behind a tree crying), but he was stunned by the scene before him.
The legendary, ferocious "Pilgrim of the Dark Lord," Ivan Potter, was drawing on the ground with a stick.
And Firenze, the proud centaur elder, was staring wide-eyed at the scribbles, trembling all over as if witnessing a miracle.
"This... this is..." Firenze's voice shook as he pointed at the complex 3D coordinate system on the ground. "This is the trajectory of the stars? You derived it using... 'Calculus'?"
Ivan didn't even look up, still rotating the skewer. "Basic operations. Newton's Third Law applies in the magical world too; you just call 'force' 'magic'. Sit, don't stand there like a giraffe."
Firenze sat stiffly on a rock like an obedient elementary student, staring at Ivan with fanaticism.
"I studied the stars all my life..." Firenze murmured. "We thought Mars bright meant the god of war's anger, comets were omens of doom... Turns out, it's just a simple 'Elliptical Parabola'?"
Ivan handed the roasted meat to the Mechanical Husky (which caught it with a mechanical arm and chewed slowly), then tossed a notebook to Firenze.
"This is Introduction to Magical Astrophysics · Volume 1. It explains why Mercury goes retrograde and why your Divination class is a waste of time."
Firenze took the notebook, read one page, and let out a horse-like whinny, tears streaming down his face.
"Truth... this is the truth!"
Firenze stood up suddenly and bowed deeply to Ivan, his forehead almost touching the ground. "Master Ivan! Please allow me to be your apprentice! I want to learn... that thing called 'Advanced Math'! I want to know if 'L'Hôpital's Rule' can calculate a dragon's lifespan!"
> [System Alert: Firenze (Faith Collapsed + Extreme Thirst for Knowledge + Centaur Worldview Remodeled): Emotion Value +800!]
Sirius, hanging from the tree, was dumbfounded.
That was Firenze!
The proud centaur who might not even give Dumbledore face!
Now he wants to be a third-year student's apprentice?! And learn what "Advanced Math"? Is that some Dark Magic?
"Woof! Woof woof!" (Don't learn that! Let me down first! I want to learn too! I'm an Animagus! I count as half a zoologist!)
Sirius struggled, trying to get attention.
Ivan glanced at him and snapped his fingers.
The vine loosened, and Sirius free-fell, face-planting into the dirt.
He tried to scramble up to grab meat, but the Mechanical Husky turned its head, red electronic eyes locking onto Sirius.
"Warning: Similar biological entity detected. Breed: Large Canine · Animagus Variant."
"Suggestion: Engage in friendly exchange (Physical)."
The Mechanical Husky stood up, its body expanding to two meters tall, the buzzsaw in its mouth spinning rapidly.
It walked up to Sirius, extended a mechanical claw, and pressed it on Sirius's head.
Sirius froze.
As a dog, he felt a double suppression of bloodline and technology from this mechanical monster.
Like a stray dog meeting a T-Rex in power armor.
"Sit." The Mechanical Husky emitted a synthesized electronic voice.
Sirius: ???
"Shake."
Sirius tremblingly raised a paw.
"Roll over."
Sirius rolled over on the ground in humiliation, his tail even wagging involuntarily.
Firenze watched, stunned, then showed an envious expression. "It seems its intelligence core has evolved 'Alpha Consciousness'. Although Sirius is an Animagus, before the 'Algorithm', he is still a low-level carbon-based lifeform."
Ivan took a bite of an apple, watching the farce.
"Alright, stop playing."
Ivan kicked the Mechanical Husky. "Go get Hagrid. Tell him I've conscripted his 'Behemoth'. In exchange, he can pet this dog."
The Mechanical Husky hummed, dropped to all fours, and charged into the bushes like a tank, dragging Hagrid out from behind a tree with one claw.
Hagrid was clutching a dead Blast-Ended Skrewt, crying like a two-hundred-pound baby.
"Ivan..." Hagrid sobbed. "My baby... it became a lump of iron..."
"It's upgraded, Hagrid." Ivan pointed to the Mechanical Husky forcing Sirius to jump through a fire hoop. "Now it doesn't need to eat carrion, just needs charging. And it can guard the Forbidden Forest for you; Acromantulas are just spicy snacks to it."
Hagrid looked at the majestic mechanical dog, then at Sirius being bullied helplessly, and laughed through his snot bubbles.
"Really? Can... can it have puppies?"
Ivan rolled his eyes. "You can ask Dumbledore to install a 'Reproduction Module', but I suggest you learn 'Circuit Repair' first."
Just then, the sky above the Forbidden Forest darkened.
A cold, sinister wind blew, suppressing the campfire to mere embers.
Firenze jerked his head up, looking at a specific direction in the sky, his face changing drastically.
"Bad... that astrological sign..."
He grabbed Ivan's notebook, fingers calculating madly. "According to your 'Calculus' model... that black dot isn't a meteorite! That is... the fluctuation of Reverse Apparition!"
Ivan narrowed his eyes, looking into the deep darkness.
There, a tall figure was slowly walking out.
He wore magnificent robes, held an ash wand, and wore a gentle, hypocritical smile.
Gilderoy Lockhart.
Or more accurately... a Lockhart possessed by something.
"My, my, it seems lively here."
'Lockhart' smiled, but his voice sounded like glass grinding against glass, sharp and piercing. "Ivan Potter, you have quite a few 'toys'. Can you... share one with me?"
His gaze stared greedily at the Mechanical Husky, then at the roast meat in Ivan's hand.
"I'm hungry too... haven't eaten... a fresh soul in a long time..."
Sirius's fur stood on end; he hid behind Ivan, shivering.
"Woof..." (This guy smells... worse than a Dementor!)
But Ivan smiled.
He tossed the roast meat bone to the Mechanical Husky, then stood up, dusting off the grease from his hands.
"Want to eat?"
Ivan pulled a set of... scalpels from his System Space?
"Perfect. I also want to see, if I slice your brain open, is it filled with paste or cotton?"
"By the way, Firenze." Ivan said without looking back. "Do you remember Newton's First Law I just taught you?"
Firenze paused. "Of... Of course! An object will remain at rest or in uniform motion in a straight line unless acted upon by an external force!"
"Good." Ivan pointed at 'Lockhart' opposite them. "Now, please use that law to help me calculate—how much force is needed to kick this guy back to Azkaban."
Firenze froze for a second, then fanaticism exploded in his eyes.
He raised his hoof—the "External Force."
"I think... I can use 'Mass times Acceleration' to give him a surprise!"
The smile on 'Lockhart's' face froze.
He felt like he wasn't facing a group of wizards, but a gang of thugs... wielding Advanced Mathematics like bricks?