Something was wrong.
That was the first thought.
There was this repititive sound drilling into my head.
I tried to lift my hand to cover my ears, but my body didn't respond.
I tried to open my eyes. It felt heavy.
When they finally opened, the world didn't make any sense.
There was a white ceiling, IV in my arm, and a machine beside me beeping with the sound I'd been hearing since forever.
I was in the hospital?!!
How did I get here?
The last thing I remembered was calling my mom.
Then the screaming when dad crashed….
My breath hitched.
I tried to scream. Nothing came out.
I tried again. I could feel my throat move, but there was no sound. I could only hear my voice in my head.
My hands started trembling. I stared at them like they didn't belong to me, like I was watching someone else's body fail.
This isn't real. This isn't real.
I tried to say it.
Suddenly, the door opened.
A woman in scrubs walked in, flipping through papers like this was normal. She looked up and froze.
"Oh my," she said, looking surprised. "You're awake. At last!"
At last?
"How are we feeling today?" she asked gently.
I stared at her.
"Can you tell me your name?" she tried.
I opened my mouth. Nothing came out.
She smiled softly.
"That's okay," she said quickly. "Just squeeze my hand."
I did.
She nodded, writing something down, already turning away like she wasn't the only thing keeping me from losing my mind.
No please, don't leave. I wanted to scream that after her.
But she left anyways.
Leaving me alone again.
The beeping felt louder. The walls felt closer.
I tried to remember. I searched my head desperately, like I could rewind time if I thought hard enough.
The party. Owen and lily's betrayal...
My chest tightened.
I shouldn't have gone.
I knew I shouldn't have gone.
The door opened again.
"Evelyn?"
I turned my head slowly.
Mom!
She stood in the doorway, widening her eyes, like she wasn't sure I was real.
She looked different. Tired and lean in a way I'd never seen before.
"Eve," she whispered, rushing toward me. "Oh my God.
She grabbed my face with her trembling hands, crying and laughing at the same time.
"You're awake. You're really awake."
I tried to say her name. I tried so hard it hurt. But I couldn't.
"Eve?" she said softly. "Talk to me, honey."
I shook my head, as the tears kept dropping down my face.
Fear took over her eyes.
Her smile fell apart instantly.
The doctor came in not long after, speaking in calm sentences I barely heard.
I watched my mom instead. The way her hands kept shaking. The way she nodded too fast.
I didn't hear most of it.
I was stuck on one thought, looping endlessly in my head.
How did this happen?
"This is temporary," the doctor said calmly. "Her brain is protecting her."
Protecting me from what?
"You've been unconscious for a while," he added, turning to me. "Do you know how long?"
I shook my head again.
He paused.
"Four months."
No. That was impossible.
Because my last memory was still the road.
If four months had passed…
why did it still feel like yesterday?
Four months meant winter turning into spring.
My classmates moving to another grade without me.
Four months meant….
"No," I tried to say. No sound came out.
My mom's voice broke. "Eve… you turned nineteen."