"Ever since you got here... my stable life has turned into a mess. Whatever it is you're doing... just get the hell out of here!"
He was looking at me with dead seriousness. I wanted to make him pay for the disrespectful way he spoke about my mother, but all I heard were more disgusting words coming out of his mouth.
I pressed the gun a little harder against him and leaned in closer... our noses were almost touching.
"You can be as stubborn as you want... but I will make you get used to me!"
He grumbled and leaned his head toward my ear, his breath hot against my skin. "And if you can't, what then? Will you force me under you again, you little p*ş homo?"
No, I'll do much more than that.
"Why... you seemed like you wanted it?" I countered. He turned his head away, avoiding my gaze. "Do I look like a homo from where you're standing?"
I stared at him and let out a frustrated sigh. "Get your eyes off me! You make me sick!"
The man who was someone else entirely when he was drunk was now acting like a different person. Even though he was the one who started it... he was acting as if I were the guilty one.
...
He could have pushed me back with a single move, but was he afraid of the gun? His eyes flickered every time I moved the weapon. I don't know what he went through in his past, but I guessed it wasn't anything pleasant.
Because I had placed my leg between his, I was putting pressure on his groin. I didn't realize it until he spoke up.
"G-get off me already... go do your pathetic moves on someone else."
I didn't feel like moving. Since his work didn't officially start until 7, he had nothing else to do. I just wanted to get under his skin. I pushed my leg a bit further and smirked.
"Why? What are you so afraid of?"
It wasn't my fault for being this indifferent; it was the Mr. Ender from five years ago who made me this way. He placed his hand on my leg, trying to push me away. I couldn't tell if he was acting, but he seemed to be struggling just to move me. I wanted to push my luck a little more.
...
As I applied pressure, he tilted his head back and gritted his teeth. It was honestly a pleasure to watch.
"Move your f*cking leg... do you want to lose your limbs?!"
I continued my movements with a grin, and I couldn't help but smirk wider when I realized he was getting hard.
"You don't look very 'homo'... true. But... what's this then, Mr. Ender? Your body seems to be saying the exact opposite."
Angered, he tried to shove me off his chest. I grabbed his zipper and pulled it down. He was so aroused that he flinched like someone who hadn't had sex in ages. When I pulled him out, he grabbed my hair and glared.
"Get off me... enough!"
Even the way he tugged at my hair was cute. When my lips touched him, he jumped. He moved his hand from my hair to my shoulder, gripping it tightly. He tilted his head back, a mark forming where the gun had been pressing. I tossed the gun aside.
As I used my mouth, he covered his face with his hand, turning crimson. The man from a few minutes ago was gone.
Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. He snapped his head toward the sound.
"Mr. Ender, your girlfriend Ece Hanım is here. She wants to see you, sir?"
Ece was his uncle's daughter—his cousin. After what happened that day, she seemed brave enough to show her face to him. I ignored the interruption and continued, but I noticed Ender was staring at the door. Did he still love her?
"I-it's me, Ender... I came to talk about that day. Even if you don't let me in... at least listen to what I have to say."
As I continued, he couldn't hold back a moan. I quickly pressed my hand over his mouth to muffle the sound.
"I... I did those things because of my father, Ender. He said if I got pregnant... he could use you. But... but..."
Ender turned his head toward me, his eyes pleading for me to stop. Since I didn't understand what he wanted, I brought my fingers to his entrance. When I pushed inside, he went rigid for a second before his head dropped onto my shoulder.
"When I couldn't get pregnant from you... I had to find another way! It was all because of my father... and... I never thought you would f-find out..."
Wow, look at that plan. So that's how it is...
"E-Ender... I love you so much... so, so much..."
As his trembling increased while my hand was still inside him, I realized things were going south. Wait... what?
I pulled my hand away and fixed his clothes. His head was still on my shoulder... and he was crying. Since my hand was still over his mouth, he didn't pull away; instead, he pressed his own hand against mine so she wouldn't hear him. Who could love someone this much?
"I-I'm not trying to justify myself with what I'm saying... I just... I just love you so much that I wanted to reveal this secret... and soon, my father will come back with even worse things. Please take care of yourself... please."
The sound of her nails scratching against the door faded as she walked away, her high heels clicking down the hall.
Even a man as tough as Mr. Ender had a weakness. Even though I was angry that he was crying for her, I had to suppress my feelings because of his tears. A man who was usually so harsh, never showing what was inside... seeing him doubled over in tears like this made no sense to me. My gut told me there was no way he should let something like this break him.
He pushed his hands against me and shoved me back. So, he could do it if he wanted to.
He stood up, stumbling slightly.
...
He was a man who had dreams of loving someone, being loyal... getting married and building a home. Now, he was trying to fix a life that had been turned upside down. I wanted to rebuild everything from scratch... for him. Because his mere existence affected me deeply.
...
I felt pathetic. It was so hard to approach the man I loved while he was suffering from heartbreak for someone else.
...
He walked over to the cabinet and splashed water on his face. "I've been patient with you... but you've crossed the line."
I swallowed and took a step back. I clenched my fists. I wanted to try my luck one last time before he said something that would break my heart.
"I know I'm not in a position to ask for favors... but if I see you collapse... that means everything is over."
I shuffled my feet, waiting for him to look at me. He slowly turned his head. I continued, my voice steady.
"That's why... please... let me stay by your side during these difficult times. Please!"