Inside the classroom.
Tobirama saw that everyone was seated and began his speech.
"My name is Senju Tobirama. I am your teacher. You are the first batch of students to attend the Ninja Academy, so I will be teaching you personally. Now, let's start with self-introductions."
However, the students in their seats all looked quite shy.
Tobirama looked at Mizuna, hoping he would take the lead and introduce himself first.
Mizuna noticed Tobirama's gaze. Receiving the signal, Mizuna shot Tobirama a "Say no more, fam" expression.
Then, he stood up.
"OK! Listen up, people! All eyes on me! Look at me! Look at me! I have an announcement to make!" Mizuna shouted.
Hearing Mizuna's shout, everyone turned to look at him.
Even Tobirama was confused by Mizuna's outburst.
I asked you to start, yes, but I didn't ask you to start with a sonic boom, Tobirama thought.
Then, Mizuna pulled a small recorder out of his pocket and pressed play. A calm, jazzy background music filled the classroom.
This was BGM Mizuna had recorded in advance for emergency situations...
(Actually, the System recorded it! Mizuna couldn't get modern instruments.)
With the chill lo-fi beats playing in the background, Mizuna began his introduction.
"My name is Uzumaki Mizuna. I'm 13 years old. My house is in the northeast section of the Senju Compound, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as a student at the Ninja Academy, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally fish. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of Chakra control exercises before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up..." (Note: Yoshikage Kira's Monologue from JoJo Part 4).
As Mizuna spoke, sunlight filtered through the leaves outside, casting shadows across his face.
This gave Mizuna's already handsome face an oppressive, villainous aura.
"My dream is to bring peace to the Ninja World."
The boys were sweating buckets listening to Mizuna's introduction.
Meanwhile, Kagami Uchiha's eyes widened as he stared at Mizuna, as if he had found a soulmate.
"WOAH! So strong! So powerful! As expected of Mizuna! He easily did what we could not!" Hiruzen exclaimed from the side. (Note: JoJo Part 1 Speedwagon/Dio meme).
"Is... is this the result of Lord Tobirama's training? So strong," Danzo marveled.
Tobirama: I didn't! I'm not! This isn't me!
After finishing his explanation, Mizuna sat down and continued to act cool.
Suddenly! The boys realized that all the girls around them were looking at Mizuna with heart-eyes.
"Damn it! That brat stole all the thunder!"
"We have to teach him a lesson!"
"That's right! We have to beat him until he loses all face!!"
The boys muttered amongst themselves.
Tobirama looked at the abstract performance art that was Mizuna, covered his face, and sighed helplessly.
Mizuna is a good kid in every way, except for this habit of causing chaos... Tobirama sighed internally.
However, Mizuna's introduction was effective. Every student started introducing themselves.
"I'm Torifu Akimichi. My dream is to eat delicious food every day! Also, I don't like people calling me fat!"
"I'm Kagami Uchiha. My hobby is peace. My dream is to fill the village and clan with peace."
"I'm Danzo Shimura! My hobby is getting stronger, and my dream is to become the Hokage who protects the village!"
Tobirama nodded in approval at this one.
"I'm Homura Mitokado. My hobby is reading. My dream is to make a name for myself and revitalize my clan." As he spoke, he glanced at Koharu Utatane sitting next to him.
Yes, Homura and Koharu had known each other since childhood. Homura had a crush on Koharu, but she friend-zoned him, so he dared not confess.
"I'm Koharu Utatane. My hobby is also reading. My dream is to climb higher, and, and..." Koharu twisted shyly.
"And find a reliable, good man..."
When the boys heard this, they boiled over with excitement, trying even harder to showcase their strengths.
Especially Hiruzen. He literally plagiarized Mizuna's speech word for word.
If Mizuna was "Handsome with a hint of danger," Hiruzen was "Disgusting with a hint of registered offender."
After finishing, he didn't forget to wink at Koharu.
Koharu: Family, who understands? There's a pervert harassing me today!
Other girls:
"Disgusting! Pervert! Stalker! Super Pervert! Evil Monkey! Horny Baboon..."
However, Hiruzen thought these girls were captivated by him. He started fantasizing about all the girls fighting over him.
He drooled while thinking, and suddenly blurted out:
"Heh~ Women~"
Mizuna and Danzo looked at him like they were constipated.
---
Soon, it was noon. Everyone started eating lunch. Tobirama left the classroom to eat.
Mizuna was about to open his bento box to see what his sister made for him.
A shadow sneaked up behind him, holding a chalkboard eraser full of chalk dust, preparing to Dunk it right onto Mizuna's head.
Mizuna's two buddies didn't notice, too busy checking out their own lunches.
Kagami Uchiha, sitting in front, keenly noticed the situation. Koharu Utatane, who was about to get up and share her lunch with Mizuna, also saw it.
Just as they were about to shout a warning, it was too late.
The person raised the eraser and smashed it down.
But Mizuna dodged to the side and launched an uppercut.
"SHORYUKEN!" Mizuna shouted.
Mizuna's rising uppercut launched the person two meters into the air.
The assailant landed on the ground, clutching his chin and rolling around in pain.
Mizuna walked up to him, intending to ask why he did that.
But the person looked up and roared first.
His eyes were crimson with a single tomoe spinning in them.
This person was Laicai Uchiha (Placeholder name: Uchiha "Money-Come"), the grandson of the clan's fourth elder.
"YEAH! You want to show off, kid? Let's see how long you can act tough! HYYAA!"
Laicai Uchiha shouted and suddenly swung a punch at Mizuna.
Just as the fist was about to hit Mizuna's stomach...
Mizuna bent his arm and unleashed his new Taijutsu move.
"100% MAXIMUM ELBOW!" Mizuna shouted.
Laicai suddenly hallucinated a muscular black man wearing a yellow jersey with the number 24, elbowing him in the face while shouting: "Man! What can I say!"
Wham!
A violent elbow smashed into his face.
Laicai Uchiha flew backward and crashed into the podium.
His lackeys ran over to help him up, but he was drenched in cold sweat. After taking that elbow, he hallucinated that he was trapped in a metal box falling from the sky (Helicopter). He couldn't elbow the door open and watched helplessly as the ground rushed toward him. Then he smiled with acceptance... and exploded. (Note: Kobe meme - Mamba Out).
Yes! To stop people from bothering him, Mizuna used a Genjutsu on him.
Laicai's nose was bleeding—broken, obviously. His body couldn't stop shaking, as if he had just survived a near-death experience.
Seeing this, the other boys decided not to trouble Mizuna. Lol, who would mess with someone that much stronger than them?
Others didn't understand, but Kagami Uchiha saw it clearly. That was obviously the reaction of someone under a Genjutsu. Kagami was shocked.
What kind of Genjutsu can terrify an Uchiha with a One-Tomoe Sharingan like that?
Kagami was very curious and planned to talk to Mizuna later.
The girls screamed, eyes filled with hearts looking at Mizuna.
Seeing the trouble was over, Mizuna returned to his seat to eat.
Seeing Mizuna return coolly, Koharu Utatane ran over.
The other girls saw this and cursed internally that she beat them to it.
"Um... I made some rice balls... do you want..."
She opened her bento box, ready to share her handmade rice balls with Mizuna.
Suddenly, another hand snatched a rice ball and shoved it into a mouth.
Koharu froze.
Yes! It was Hiruzen!
"Woman~ Remember to put some meat in next time~ This Lord is a carnivore~"
Hiruzen said the last sentence with a "Vocal Fry" (greasy/deep voice) meant to sound sexy.
It was as disgusting as it gets.
Seeing her love-filled rice ball desecrated by a pervert, Koharu's eyes turned red. She slapped Hiruzen across the face.
"You're sick!" Koharu shouted.
Then she grabbed her remaining rice balls and ran back to her seat, eyes red with tears.
Seeing this, the other girls stopped being jealous of Koharu and started pitying her for being harassed by a pervert.
Also, no girl dared to approach Mizuna while Hiruzen was nearby anymore.
After being slapped, Hiruzen held the pose, head lowered, lost in thought.
Danzo ignored him because he knew what Hiruzen was like.
Mizuna didn't know, so he tried to comfort Hiruzen.
Suddenly, Hiruzen lifted his head, gave a devilish smirk, and said in a voice that sounded like he had a slipper stuck in his throat:
"Woman~ Playing hard to get? Interesting~ You have successfully attracted~ my~ attention~" (Note: CEO Trope).
Mizuna was visibly terrified by Hiruzen's state.
There was a clear red handprint on Hiruzen's face.
Mizuna recovered and said to Hiruzen:
"Hiruzen... There are three great illusions in a man's life... She likes me, I can counter-kill, and I can do it too..."
Mizuna spoke softly, afraid of hurting Hiruzen's fragile heart.
But he clearly underestimated the thickness of Hiruzen's skin.
"Mizuna, what are you talking about? She obviously likes me! Definitely!"
Mizuna looked at Hiruzen and was speechless.
Then Hiruzen suddenly said:
"Oh! I know! Mizuna... are you jealous of me?"
Mizuna had no reaction to this. He simply patted Hiruzen on the shoulder and whispered:
"Hiruzen... Batman said you can go back to Gotham. He won't hit you anymore..." (Note: Joker Meme / "You are a clown").
Hiruzen paused.
"Batman? Who's that?"
Mizuna: "......"
......