Summary:Everyone now comes in the know about what really went down in the Helicarrier before the Battle of New York, as well as how not-dead a certain person is. But this is not the only thing happening at that time. HYDRA gets ready to overtake SHIELD and make their great comeback after their fall in WWII, and no-one knows who they can trust. And what about that one double agent?
To top everything up, what will happen with Quinn's future, now that he escaped SHIELD but has the Avengers looking for him? And, how will his knowledge of Skye's powers affect the story and, possibly, lead to some more answers about her past?
~ currently on hiatus, will get back to it eventually
Chapter 1: No More SecretsNotes:
All rights go to Marvel
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter TextSkye's POV
Some things that needed to be discussed with people. And not every person in the Tower knew the same things as others already did. Everyone had various versions of what I did to Coulson, what happened to him and all that.
Natasha and Clint knew the most out of everyone but Jemma. Well, that is not technically correct. They knew less in some aspects and more in others than the biochemist did.
Jemma knew that Coulson was alive, but not the details behind as to how that came to be. And while she knew that I had been under Loki's control, she still didn't know that it was I that killed him in the first place. She was also completely unaware of my previous connection to him and his lack of recognition towards me.
And then there were the rest of the Avengers and Pepper. All of whom knew of Coulson to be dead and by Loki's hand.
So, you can understand how telling all of them about the current situation that we are in was a lot more complicated than I had initially thought when I told the pirate that I wanted to let everyone know about Coulson being alive. Because it was not just a case of telling them just that. They needed to be brought up to speed about everything that happened before that. And I think that this was the part that I was dreading the most.
I looked up from my lap, as everyone had gathered around me in various positions. Because the room was too small to fit everyone, I had been rolled in a wheelchair in the main living room used by the occupants of the Tower when we'd all meet. I did try to convince them to let me at least walk there and sit on one of the sofas, but several threats of having me restrained should I even consider lifting my butt of the wheelchair were thrown my way and I didn't bother arguing anymore.
Natasha, Pepper and Jemma combining their powers was a sight to be seen.
"Are you sure you're up for this?" Pepper asked. "Whatever this is can wait a few more days until you're feeling better" she continued and took my hand in hers.
I returned the small smile that she gave me, though I felt that it came out more like a grimace than a smile. "It's alright. And, after all, they should be here as well, help explain a few things" I replied and pointed to where Maria and Nick were standing to the side. "They need to get back and… honestly? The sooner this is out of my chest the better"
Natasha threw a, somewhat, threatening glare their way. As if daring them to push me into doing something I was not ready to do.
"Promise me you will hold your questions till the end?" I asked around the room. They all gave hesitant nods, still not knowing what this was all about.
So I took a deep breath, steeling some nerves.
"There are a few things you don't know about what happened to Phil," I started. My eyes moved around the room to take in everyone's faces. I could see realisation being drawn to Nat's and Clint's faces as to what I was about to say, and their eyes travelled briefly to the two high-ups of S.H.I.E.L.D. before coming back to my direction.
"Phil Coulson came in the room where Loki was kept in hopes of stopping him as he had escaped his cell". But before I could continue any further, and not caring at all about the 'questions at the end' rule that I had set only a moment ago, I was interrupted.
"We all know about this already" Tony spoke up. "Why are you bringing this up again?" He asked, clenching and unclenching his fist. For all that Tony showed liked he didn't care for anyone but himself, he had taken this loss quite personally.
"Stop it, Stark" Steve said as soon as Tony phrased his question. His tone clipped, understanding the heaviness of the atmosphere. He nodded in my direction to continue and I returned it.
"As I was saying, Phil came in. Thor was in Loki's cell, about to drop from the Helicarrier. And that's when he walked in, weapon in hand, as he pointed at the alien Nazi". A lump formed in my throat and I swallowed it hard before resuming. "I was in the room with them, still under Loki's influence, with his spear in my hand and with clear orders to protect him at all costs" I paused for a second, letting my words be processed by the people who didn't know and I could see it in their faces that realisation was starting to settle in. "And I did"
It was as if the room's temperature dropped simnifically, as everyone held their breath, hoping that what I had just said was a sick joke.
"You're kidding" Tony broke the quiet once more. "You have got to be kidding. Tell me you're kidding" he said over and over again as he shook his head, distrust all over him. He looked around at the others who had yet to take their eyes off me. "Come on, people… someone! Back me up here!" And when no-one else said anything he turned back to me. "Skye, stop this… why?"
"Because I have been hiding the truth for more than 2 years now and it is time for everyone in here to know, you all deserve at least that much" I replied. "I'm sorry I didn't say anything sooner, I couldn't"
"Who knew about this?" Steve asked, using more of his 'Captain America' voice than his more relaxed tone.
"We did" Natasha and Clint stepped forward. "Us and those two" she pointed to the aforementioned agents waiting on the side. "No-one else but us four knew of this. And in case anyone is actually doubting her," she pointedly looked at Tony. "…she's telling the truth".
Again, I gave everyone a moment to digest this before I continued. I, briefly, felt brave enough to look over at Jemma's side. She was taking things in but when our eyes met all I saw was acceptance and it made it a bit easier. The same with Pepper, who squeezed my hand.
"You all good before I continue?" I asked around, giving people a chance to say something.
Natasha and Clint exchanged a look. "There's more?" Clint asked, having figured that what I had just revealed to everyone was what I had gathered them here for.
I nodded.
"Coulson is alive" I said.
And if I thought that the silence before was absolute, then I would not be able to say what was happening at this moment.
If a pin dropped, two floors above, we'd still be able to hear it.
"He is alive, after Fury used an experimental drug on him which he had saved in case an Avenger fell in the Battle. But in order to keep his resurrection a secret from us, he doesn't remember me" I continued. "For all he knows, he met me about 3 months ago, when he picked me up from my undercover mission and I have been part of his team ever since"
I could tell those news took everyone by surprise as some jaws opened and closed a handful of times, unable to think of anything to say, and several pair of eyes travelled between Nick, Maria and myself trying to decipher a hidden meaning behind this.
And you can probably guess who it was that broke the silence.
"Under how heavy of a medication are you right now?" Tony all but screamed. His eyes travelled to where Bruce was standing, who actually lifted his tablet to check that number.
"Really, Tony?" I said back, hurt bleeding in my voice. Bruce lifted his head to look at me and I just shook mine. "This isn't something I thought I saw or just came up with! Are you seriously thinking that I would mistake seeing and spending days with the man that was like a father to me?", my tone was sharp.
"This is not someth—," Jemma tried to say something, probably help me out but was cut off quickly by the same man.
"Who's to say that this is not just your PTSD acting up?" He countered and I tightened my jaw so that I wouldn't say anything back. "We all know how hard his loss was for you, and with this new information it makes all the more sense" he continued. "And you had to miss the 2nd year anniversary of his death because you were undercover. Pepper told me how hard you took that!"
"Oh my God! Will you stop and listen for a second?" I couldn't hold it back in. I could feel my emotions getting the better of me, and my vibrations were still not 100% under control, which led to a small quake shaking the floor. And if anyone had shifted their attention elsewhere, I had, once more, all the room's attention on me. "It wasn't that bad because of the missed anniversary! It was because just the day before I had come face to face with the person that I had killed, who did not even recognise me. Can you fathom that for just a second? I know you really don't want to believe me, but why would I lie about something like that?!"
"Skye…" Pepper voice and her squeezing my hand made me turn to look at her. Her eyes pointing to my torso.
I looked down, only to see a red patch where my stitches were. Only then did some pain start to register, as I was too riled up before. My free hand automatically went to that spot, my fingers getting stained red when they pressed on the wound. "Shit" I said under my breath.
I let out a breath, trying to reign in the vibrations that had escaped. When the room stopped shaking and it felt like it would stay that way I smiled at Pepper who seemed to understand and let go of my hand.
"If you have any other questions, feel free to ask Maria or Nick. They are the ones that know everything" I said and it was clear that I was done with this whole conversation. At least for the moment.
"Let's get you patched up" Bruce said and made a move to come close but my next words stopped him. "Jemma has it handled, right?" I asked, looking back at her who nodded and took her position on the back of my wheelchair ready to push me. I was still a bit hurt but how quick he was to seemingly agree with Tony's words.
"Please come and find me later" I said to Nat, Clint and Pepper. "I'd like for us to talk about this and to be given a chance to explain more". I could still see the hesitation and the sharpness of the look that the two agents threw to Maria and Nick. I knew that my exit would be followed by a long, tedious and probably on the upper volume 'discussion'.
"You know where to find me" I tuned to also look at Bruce and Steve, the latter nodding his head. "As for you…" my eyes traveled to Tony. I told a deep breath and let it out, shaking my head and Jemma got the cue to roll me out of the room.
As soon as the doors closed on the elevator, a burst of arguing voices was heard from the room that we had just left.
I felt Jemma's hand on my shoulder, showing her support. I brought my not-stained hand to grip hers as I let the tears roll down my face.
Notes:Hey everyone! Here we go with Book 3. Now, the uploading schedule from now on will be weird and will vary. I have a vague idea where this is headed, but I am not entirely sure how to go there yet, or what happens in between. Unfortunately this is the way that I write and it makes things harder for me. I will post a new chapter, eventually, but it might be a while.
Sorry for any mistakes on this chapter and for how short it was compared to my latest ones. I hope you all enjoyed it nonetheless. Take care and thank you all for the support :) See you all soon!
Chapter 2: Together We CanNotes:
All rights go to Marvel
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Natasha's POV
I heard the *whoosh* from the apartment door opening and closing. I didn't move from where I was sitting in the living room of the floor that Tony had provided Clint and me. My head was in my hands and I was bending over the living room table. I felt the sofa next to me sink but Clint made no move to touch me. He knew better than that.
"She's asleep" he broke the silence. "Wanted to stay up, but the sedative that Jemma gave her kicked in pretty quickly" he simply informed me and then sat back as he waited.
And waited until I had managed to sort of short out my thoughts and make the headache subside ever so slightly. The breath that I let out was all the indication he needed before he had me in his arms. "I thought we were past the lies" I confessed as he drew patterns on my back. I let my head fall on his shoulder. Even after all those years, trying to show feelings and explain what I felt, was a bit hard at times.
"I know" he simply replied. I could feel his frown. "And I don't think she has told us the whole story yet" and it was clear that this was hitting him just as hard. "Who would blame her, though? What, with how Stark reacted?" I felt the muscles on the back of my neck tense just at the mention of him and his hand moved there to try and release the tension. "Okay, no talking about him" he added quickly, yet quietly.
"Pepper was the only reason why I didn't punch him," I said.
I felt him nod. "Can't say, I didn't enjoy her smacking and the earful that followed. I'm sure that this was just a small sample of her dismay. She still hasn't left Skye's side and I doubt she will be doing so anytime soon. She and Jemma won't be leaving that room for a while, I believe".
His fingers soothing the muscles on my neck were making wonders and I let myself sink further on him. This was not even close to the end and I had to admit that I was kind of dreading what would follow. An idea came to my head, followed by more frustrating thoughts and I felt the headache coming back full-force.
"Hey, hey. None of that" Clint interrupted my riding thoughts quickly. "What's going on in that head of yours?"
I sighed. "We need to call May" I let out. "Skye might not have mentioned her…"
"But she definitely knows" Clint finished for me and I nodded in agreement.
"And I think it would be good having her over. Skye would definitely appreciate it and the fact that Stark's scared of her will only help". God knows that Skye could use a few good people at her side now, both because she was healing and… well, and because of everything else.
Clint could see that my mind was drifting off. "What's wrong?" He gently pressed once more, able to tell me overthinking about stuff.
I shook my head, having an 'it's nothing' on the tip of my tongue when he pointedly looked at me and lifted an eyebrow. I sighed instead and took a moment to gather my thoughts as they were all over the place. It seemed like the pattern for the evening. "I am just… I have this feeling that this wasn't the end of it, you know?" I let my eyes travel to the door of the floor we were staying.
He let out a breath and though his fingers stopped momentarily, he resumed his caresses. "I know what you mean. There is more. More what, I don't know yet. But I am planning on finding out", the steel in his voice didn't leave any room for argument, but I was having it.
Turning to face him, I basically moved a bit further away, lifted myself from where I had lied down to make sure that my eyes conveyed the importance of my words. "You won't press" the steel in my voice battled his own. "I think she thinks she's protecting us. I am pretty certain of it" I added. "The years that she disappeared after the Academy in fear of hurting us because of her powers are enough of an indication. I think that mindset never really left her, and that might be why she hid what she hid until just now"
"I know", he agreed quickly. "I never said anything about pressing her". And I couldn't say that I didn't agree with his trail of thought. Because none of us was really over with what Fury and Maria did. Because they might have answered a few things, but until everyone had cooled down properly, we couldn't really get the answers we wanted and so we agreed to meet up again first thing in the morning to continue with where we left off. Which, not surprisingly, was not too long after Jemma had escorted Skye back to her room.
"You wanna take the first shift, or should I?" He got up and stretched. I tilted my head to the side, fainting ignorance. "Like you wouldn't spend the whole night making sure Skye was okay", he said with a 'we both know it, don't even try to deny it' vibe following his words. It didn't matter that we were in one of the safest buildings in the world. Not when it came to Skye.
"I'll go first," I said following his lead. "Try and get some rest, we have a long night ahead of us". I leaned and gently pressed my lips on his. His hands found their way around me as he pressed me closer to his body.
When I tried to move away he leaned down and kissed me once more. When he leaned back, our eyes met and I could see the complexity of his emotions right behind his eyes. "It will be okay" he emphasised.
I nodded ever so slightly and let my head rest of his chest just for one moment. "It better be"
May's POV
Knowing that Skye was okay and actually seeing her were two completely different things. And while I wanted to see her as soon as possible, there was a pressing matter at hand.
That pressing matter being Coulson.
Because as soon as Skye left the medical facility with Stark, he wanted answers. Answers that I couldn't give him, not without revealing a lot of information that he couldn't know. For his shake more than anything else.
And so a bit of chaos ensued. He did not like it at all when Simmons left as well to a classified destination. He couldn't really argue when I said that she was taken to a facility that would ensure her recovery and that Simmons was her designated doctor and had to go with, but that didn't stop him from putting up a fight about learning more.
So, when Fury finally answered his phone and made a video call with him, I was more than happy to not have to deal with things. And was even happier to be able to take a couple of weeks off and go to the Tower to see Skye. Our team had gone from the 6 people we usually were, down to 3 really quickly, with Ward also being benched, and Fury more or less ordered Coulson on the time-off. Saying that the team needed to regroup and recuperate. Which, to be fair, was something that I think everyone needed.
So, after a few more heating discussions and the promise to keep him updated as much as I could about Skye's condition and how Simmons was, I was off.
I was already on my way to the Tower when Natasha called. "What happened?" I asked instead of greeting as soon as I put the phone on speaker on the car.
"A lot" came her reply, and I could hear how tired she sounded. It only made my grip on the wheel go tighter and my foot press harder on the pedal.
"Natasha", I warned, urgency leaking in that one word.
She quickly realised where my mind was heading. "No, no don't worry. Skye's okay. Well, at least as okay she can be…" she trailed off.
I gritted my teeth. "I'll be there in half an hour," I said. "I don't know what the hell happened, but as long as she is physically okay, we will deal with the rest when I get there, okay?" It might have been phrased like a question, but it was most defiantly not.
And Natasha knew it which is why she quickly hung up after that. I might not have known what had happened, but it was clear that something did happen. Natasha knew better than to beat around the bush and the fact that she did… I did not like it. Not at all.
I tried very hard not to break the speed limit, cause the last thing that I needed right now was to be even more delayed from reaching my destination. And after 27 excruciating minutes, I had the car parked and made my way to where Skye was.
"Hello, Ms. May" the A.I. greeted me as soon as I stepped in the elevator. "Shall I take you to Skye?" He asked even though the doors were already closed and I could tell that we were already moving.
Standing outside of the room where she was, I finally let myself breathe. Skye was in bed, sleeping and Simmons with Pepper had taken over the two chairs, both dozing off in different positions. I moved closer to the room, walking in silently as to not wake any of them up because I had a feeling that the other two would have been so worried for her that they probably didn't get much sleep in the last couple of days either.
I was as close as I dared to Skye and scanned her over. She looked okay, at least from the outside. I watched as her eyebrows pinched with each other, worry showing itself on her face. The edges of her mouth were tighter than a dreamless and heavy sleep would have allowed.
I sidestepped from where Simmons was holding her hand, making my way right next to her head as I let my hand come to her hair ever so gently. Her head moved about for a bit, but she soon slowly came to as I continued my caress. She blinked, heavily, trying to get her bearings as she looked around. Her eyes darting from one place to the other, not really understanding where she is, the remaining of what she was dreaming about probably still had a hold on her.
"Hey, Skye" I whispered. "You're okay, you're safe. I won't let anything happen to you"
This seemed to make her relax even further, sinking in even more to bed that seemed to engulf her. "Mel?" She asked, her voice quiet and hoarse.
I smiled and bent down to kiss her forehead. My hand then moved to her cheek. "I will be here when you wake up, okay? Try to get some sleep. I am not going anywhere" I hoped that this was enough of a reassurance for her mind not to travel to un-savouring places whilst she was out.
It might have been only a few seconds, it might have been whole minutes, but eventually, she closed her eyes and drifted off, a sigh escaping from her lips as her head pressed itself harder on my palm.
I let my eyes travel over Skye once more, checking to make sure she was alright, trying to get the image of her bleeding out in the Bus and replace it with her sleeping in front of me.
I shook my head and left the room. I stood just outside of it with my back turned to the elevator. "Explain," I said. No footsteps were heard from behind me as I felt another presence make its way towards my location and stand right next to me. I didn't need to turn and look to know who it was.
"What do you want to know?" Natasha asked as Clint fell from the vents above.
"Everything" I replied, not looking at either of them.
And so I gathered information about what had transpired from the last time we talked on the phone. It hadn't even been that long ago, but seeing that it was well into the night and I had spent the whole day arguing and talking with Coulson, it seemed that this was an important day to miss out on.
So I listened. I listened and I stood guard with Tasha and Clint. I made a mental note to pay a visit to Stark first thing in the morning.
Notes:Hi guys! It's been a while ^^'
So, that was the latest chapter. Not a lot of things happening, but I think it was necessary after the last chapter. See you all soon! Thank you all for the support :) It helped a lot to get this chapter out there. I have a vague idea where this goes, but please bear with me as I try to figure out how exactly this happens.
Until next time...
Chapter 3: Decisions Being MadeNotes:Heya! Look who's back :)
All rights go to Marvel
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter TextSkye's POV
The following day wasn't any better than the day before. Actually, no. That would be a lie. It was slightly better. Melinda had come and her presence helped a lot. Especially since I had to deal once again with Tony and his denial.
Thankfully Nat and Clint had brought her up to speed about what happened, and I was very grateful for not having to explain everything again. The meeting that Nick and Maria had with the others in the morning didn't require my presence, but May went to help clear some things out. She was one of the only people who knew everything about everything, after all.
"Can I please have my laptop", I said to Jemma as I was perched up on the bed. She had opted out of gathering, wanting to stay with me. But I'm not sure that was the best idea, despite how much I loved her.
"No" she replied sternly, going over the documents and the charts for the nth time. "And don't even attempt to ask to get up". She wasn't even looking at me, her attention at the various monitors.
"I'm genuinely— aw!" I exclaimed as she poked gently at my sore side with the end of her pen. Her tired gaze turned to me as if she was asking, "You were saying?"
I wanted to laugh with her antics but stifled it. It would only hurt more if I did. "I was just saying I was feeling better. I know better than to say I'm good", I eventually got out. I still had some issues moving around, and getting to sit up was not something I would be able to do on my own, at least for the next couple of days. But the drugs helped a lot. My hands were folded in my lap, the fingers constantly moving around with excess energy that I didn't really have. A quiet filled the room and I did not like it.
Not in the least.
I could feel the vibrations start to build up, and I tried pushing them down. The last thing I needed right now was to reopen my stitches like the day before. "I just need to do something" I said. My voice was quiet, sounding more like an inner thought than an actual phrase I intended to get out.
There was still so much to do. I had to find the Clairvoyant, try to track down Quinn, see how Ward was connected with the problems within S.H.I.E.L.D., go through all of his connections and agents he has worked with and try to see who else is dirty, with the whole leak issue I had to think if I could also bring the rest of the Avengers in the know, ther—
My thoughts were interrupted by the feeling of Jemma's hand in mine. I had to blink a handful of times before I managed to get my breath in order, that I hadn't even realised had sped up.
"There you are", she said with a kind smile. She sat on the end of the bed, her hand never leaving mine. "I know it's a lot going on right now, and I know you want to help and do something. But sometimes, the best thing you can do is take a break, and just be". She smiled again, a sad smile. "You need to take care of yourself for once and not worry about what the rest of the world is doing, okay? Please, Skye. I need you to be okay".
I found myself calming in her presence, her touch grounding me a lot. My thoughts were not running as wild as before. Focusing on her seemed to do the trick. "I can try", was all I could give at the moment.
The smile never left her face, and I could see her shoulders relaxing a bit more, almost as if some pressure was lifted off her chest. "That's all I can ask for". She bent and kissed the crown of my head. "Now, tell me something else. Talk to me about Pepper. She seems to know a lot more about me than I do of her".
I actually felt a smile form on my face just at the thought of her. "I mean… there's so much"
She got out of the bed, and pushed the chair that was placed next to my bed even closer as she took a seat. "We have the whole day".
"How was it?" I dared to ask when Natasha, Clint, and Melinda came to my room all together at some point in the afternoon. With them present, it was one of the only ways to get Jemma to get some rest.
"Fury and Hill left, and Tony refuses to talk to anyone" Natasha summed it up pretty quickly. That alone gave me a pretty good idea how the whole conversation went.
I sighed. After what happened the day before, I was hoping that Tony would get some rest and think things through, but who was I kidding? I don't think I was expecting that to actually be. He was Tony Stark after all, the king of stubbornness. "How are the others?"
"Everyone is pretty rilled up, some more than others". It was Clint's turn. "Spirits are very heated right now, and emotions are high. Mainly towards Fury, not you" he supplied trying to make me feel better, even when we both knew it was in vain. "Why did you not tell us sooner?"
I had to take a moment.
I was expecting them to be less… I guess "direct"would be a good way to describe it. That it was going to take them a few days at least before they eventually asked me what they wanted.
"I can't say that it didn't cross my mind, more than once", I admitted. "And I really wanted to, trust me". A humourless laugh escaped my lips as I eased my head further on my pillow, and looked at the white ceiling. "It was so hard not telling you, guys. Especially you two".
Silence filled the room.
"Why didn't you?"
It didn't matter who the question came from, it still rang in my head like the tune of the ring bell that we had in the apartment that the three of them and May raised me in. I realised in the end, that it didn't really matter if I had told them or not. Because, they are family. And in the end, even if the world went to shit, I would still have them.
They would protect me, just as much as I would protect them. And it was the people that I trusted with my whole heart.
At this moment I realised, thinking back to all the secrecy that Fury was forcing upon everybody that this is what he was missing. The trust, and the sense of belonging and acceptance. He threw my trust out of the window by keeping secrets, and I was not going to let that happen with the people I had left.
Not for something like this. It wasn't worth it to me. And Fury could be as angry as he wants after this.
"It's not important why I didn't tell you. The fact that I didn't is all that matters. And I am very sorry for that" I said genuinely.
"There's more I need to tell you". My head fell back down, and I looked at the three of them, their attention rapt on me. "Not here" I looked at May, and begged her with my eyes to understand. "It's not… it's very busy". I could still see the hesitation on my sibling's faces, which hurt but was warranted. They still didn't understand and May wasn't catching on either. So I grabbed Clint's hand with mine as I continued speaking, putting pressure and releasing it in a specific pattern, to make him understand. "I might just need some time off. Jemma has been on my case to take a break, and I think it's about time. Someplace more quiet, with some time to recuperate".
It did take me doing the pattern a few times before he caught on the four letter word I was forming. I could tell the moment realisation shined on his face.
"I know it's a lot, and it's not how you were thinking of showing it. And I will still need to work on looking for Quinn and the others, and still do work, but I'd like to take some time off when I'm allowed to leave this bed" I told him.
He, in turn, squeezed once and nodded. "Don't worry about it. After all, by the time you can actually get up without our help, it's gonna be close to the holidays" he reached over and roughed my already messy hair.
I pushed him on the shoulder and tried not to laugh. I looked over and saw that the questions that May and Natasha still had. "I will explain everything in due time" I promised. "Do you trust me?" I asked Nat.
"Of course" she replied without hesitation.
Jemma's POV
I barely got any sleep. And when I did, I felt like it was fruitless. I still woke up tired. But despite how much I didn't want to, I forced myself to get up at 5 in the morning. If my memory served me right, and my thinking was correct then I should be right on time.
So, I got ready, or at least as ready as I could ever get for what I was about to do and took the elevator, asking J.A.R.V.I.S. to take me to the proper floor.
The moment the doors opened, and my arrival was made known, May stopped her gentle movements and turned towards me. "Simmons… was there something you wanted?" Agent Romanoff who was right beside her also eased her motions and came to a stop.
I wasn't expecting the extra company, but I came determined. I was doing this for Skye.
"Will you teach me?"
Notes:Okay so, first of all, thank you all for your ever-lasting patience while I was away. Thanks to anyone still reading or just picking this fic up. I have been getting a number of notifications from you all. Your comments have helped a lot to take the time I needed and to also want me to get back into the story. I don't know how often I will be updating, but I am at a point where I can start working on it again, so please bear with my weird timetable.
I ended up deleting the previous chapter because it was easier to replace it like that and for you all to get a new notification, but I have really appreciated all the comments and the support, you guys are awesome! I'm also making sure to post both here and in FF so people can use whichever platform they prefer.
Also, I haven't really written anything since the last time I posted here, so it might be a while until I shake all the dust off of my writing. But, again, thank you all for the understanding and the support you have shown. Until next time :)
Chapter 4: Two and a Half TalksNotes:Howdie. This is a large one, strap in. I hope you all enjoy!
All rights go to Marvel
Chapter TextSkye's POV
For the first time since I reached the Tower, I woke up on my own. I had fallen asleep to Nat and Clint arguing about nothing in particular. The quietness that I was met with when I opened my eyes, was a bliss.
No person to ask me how I was feeling, no one obviously very tired because they were unable to sleep at night, afraid that I would not be there in the morning. And while I appreciated their time and their love, I had not been able to be on my own and with my own thoughts since the whole debacle had started. And a lot had happened since I got shot by Quinn.
"Hey Jar, is there anyone up yet?", I called out.
"Almost everyone" he didn't miss a beat in replying. If I was lucky, that meant that Jemma had actually managed to get some rest. I mentally crossed my fingers for that to be the case. "Is there anything you need? Do you want me to call for someone?", the A.I. continued when I didn't say anything else.
"No, no" I quickly said. "Please, unless they ask, there's no need to tell them I—" my sentence was cut off by the sound of the door knocking. Had J.A.R.V.I.S. worked that fast that he called for someone before I answered him? "Come in"
The fogged up glass of the door was slowly pushed open and Captain Rogers' head pocked through. "Good morning" he said as he made his way further in the room. "How are you doing?", he asked as he came closer, but never sat on one of the multiple chairs in the room.
"I'm good" I answered not quite sure what was happening. After all, we never had spent a lot of time just the two of us. We always had more of a coworkers/acquaintances kind of relationship. "How are you doing? After everything that happened yesterday?" Cause it had to do something with that, right? I saw his fists clench a bit more and my assumptions were proven correct.
"I… have been better" he answered after some contemplation. "But I have also been worse". I could tell he was hesitating, mulling words over in his head. "Look, can I just be straight with you? I'm really bad at not saying what's on my mind" he eventually concluded.
I went to sit a bit straighter on my bed, which I didn't get very far doing before my injury flared up. Rogers was quickly by my side. "Here, let me…", he offered. And with his help I made it all the way up.
"I never had you for a guy that would be dishonest in order to spare someone's feelings" I said. "Always thought of you as the most straightforward person I have ever met"
"I'm always honest", he replied. "And I wasn't planning on being anything else, I was just wondering whether you wanted not to do this right now"
I shook my head and showed him my position. "I'm as good as I can be. And whether we do this now or later, the outcome will not change, so we might as well get this over with as soon as possible. Then we can see how we can move forward, if that is still something you would want".
He seemed, almost taken aback from my response. He still hadn't quite figured out how not to wear his heart on his sleeve. Quickly, he straightened his back and cleared his throat. "You know I had a hard time with you" he started strong, not beating around the bush. "The way we met, was particularly peculiar. You were under Loki's influence, and then I had to trust you enough during battle that you would not stab me in the back. But you proved yourself that day.
"Was I expecting you always to be honest about everything? No. From what I can tell, you are a lot like Romanoff. And you know I am not the biggest fan of secrets. Not when it comes to people, not when it comes to organisations. I think secrets make things more complicated than they need to be, and they endanger everyone involved. Even without their knowledge".
"You know you currently work for S.H.I.E.L.D., right? I mean, they're pretty much one of the top intelligence organisations. Nothing in there works without secrets. You can never know everything", I interrupted him.
"This might be the case, for now, but S.H.I.E.L.D. seems to want to work for the better of humanity. Peggy and Howard made the organisation to help the people, not to hide from them", he countered. The conviction in his voice made me think that it was something he had had plenty of time to ponder about. "And while I work with them, that doesn't stop me from telling Fury exactly what I think, even when he refuses to tell me anything in return. If I can make him think, or at least consider his lies and his secrets, it will be a win for everybody".
I understood where he was coming from, but still. I found his whole mentality to be more idealistic than realistic. "We don't live in a world that truth is what matters, Rogers. We live in a word where information holds power. Things are more complicated than you make them to be".
"If that is the case, then tell me. What power did the information that Coulson is alive held? Apart from the hurt that people felt when you told them that he was still alive?", he actually lifted an eyebrow at that.
I scoffed. "This is how simple you see the world? You think that the only complicated thing with Phil's resurrection is that people were kept on the outside? How about the untested drug that was used to bring him back to life? Let's say, for just a second that you are right, okay. Let's just assume. Imagine we let everyone at S.H.I.E.L.D. know that Phil is alive. Every agent that knew him, every single new recruit would know that he fell before the Battle of New York and with a miraculous procedure he was brought back to life.
"Did you even read the files of what had happened? Did you read about the tests, the procedures, the memory-wipe that he had to go through? Do you think every single agent would read all of that? Or would a lot see it as a testament of how much technology has advanced, and they would expect to be also saved in case they died during a mission, not really thinking the consequences? And what about foreign agents? While we would like to think that everyone at S.H.I.E.L.D. is loyal, people can be bought. People's loyalties can change. They can sell the information to other nations, other organisations, and then even more people would die trying to recover the information. Imagine the experiments of people that would try to recreate the same process, only to fail again, and again. But that would not mean that they would stop. Because it happened once, so it can happen again.
"Do you think you are the only person that was ever tested with a super-serum? You cannot really believe that they stopped after you disappeared, right? People have been trying to replicate the formula that is running through your veins for years. Some of them, we have been able to apprehend and reverse whatever damage they did. At times, it was so severe that we had to kill people for their own good. Others, we got there too late, only to see the results".
While the topic was quite heated, I didn't find myself upset. At least not yet. Because Rogers seemed to actually listen to me, instead of having my words go in one ear and come out the other.
"So…", he started after a long pause. "You mean to tell me, that you didn't trust us enough to tell us before?"
I speculate that he was trying to make me feel guilty or make me think more about what I had done. But it was something that I had thought a lot about. "No" I simply started. "Not all of you. Not with this"
"Care to elaborate on that?" His arms had folded on his chest, clearly not comfortable with how the conversation was going.
"It's simple really. You said you didn't trust me, at the beginning, why, do you think I trusted you? You have this mindset, where you think that your way is the correct way and that if people just knew the truth, then it would all work out. While I know you won't say anything about him, not now, I wasn't so sure in the past. Not with you, and not with Tony, because he tends to spill things without meaning to".
"Huh… you really have thought this through, then?"
"Well, as much as I possibly can. It's not an easy subject to discuss. And, since we are being honest and all, while I don't regret telling you the truth now, I don't regret not telling it to you sooner. Because for some reason, the way that you are thinking about this right now, you are taking feelings out of it. You think it was easy for me, to see him out of the blue, right in front of me, and in his eyes to see a stranger?"
With that last part, I saw some more flicker of emotion run pass though his eyes. His arms relaxed a bit from the rigid pose that he had taken, and he seemed to swallow hard. He took a deep breath and nodded once. "It seems that I have some things to think about. If you are open to the possibility, I would like to continue this at a later time".
"Sure thing" I replied. Honestly, I don't think I could ask him if he really set his mind to it. I dropped my head on my hand, pressing my fingers to my eyes, feeling a headache already blooming. Great, I thought. The small break I seemed to have gotten yesterday from what I should probably start calling Revelation Day, seemed to be a glitch.
This room was going to drive me crazy unless I got out soon. The fogged-up glass, and the painted-white walls was all I had seen for the past 2 days and I could not stand it anymore. I was feeling just fine. Or at least fine enough to be able to stroll out of this god forsaken room.
"Please", I practically begged at Jemma. "I need the air, to see the sun, or at least the common room! Something different".
"The last time you went out, you got upset and your stitches were torn apart from your quakes", she reminded me, like she had done every other time I had asked her in the past.
I took a deep breath and collected myself. "Last time, we were having a heated conversation with people. I will behave, I promise!" She stopped her movements momentarily and seemed to contemplate what I was asking her. "Look, if I'm not allowed to get out, okay, I understand. But can I at least have a laptop to watch a movie or something?", I tired.
She shook her head in the last part. "I don't trust that if I give you a laptop right now you won't just go back to work"
"Then have Stark monitor it, or Jar, or Tee. And have them send you a notification if I visit any site other than to simply kill some time" I countered. "But, if you still want me away from a laptop, all you have to do is take me across the building. Push me around. I won't even resist or try to get up".
Jemma, who had been a bit stiff in her movements the whole day, let out a breath as she sat down in the chair next to mine. "I guess I can't—"
Her sentence was cut short by the sound of the door opening, and May walking in, pushing a wheelchair. "It's okay, agent Simmons. I will take it from here. You" she said pointedly at her, "are supposed to be resting, no?"
"Yes, agent May" she mumbled and sighed heavily. "Take care and enjoy your ride", she smiled at me and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before leaving May and myself alone in the room.
"What just happened, here?" I asked at May as she was positioning the wheelchair and took her position to help me if I needed it.
"I don't know what you are talking about?"
"Okay so, first—argh. First, were you listening in on us? And also, what just happened with Jemma? I have been begging her to get some sleep and you just walk in here and she agrees with you? Without even a complain?" I managed to reposition myself without much trouble.
"I am her superior officer" she answered simply. If I knew it was going to be that easy to get her to sleep I should have asked her help from the day before. "As for the former, yes. And I thought it was about time you got some air", she patted me on the shoulder as she pushed me towards one of the large balconies that the Tower had.
The winter air hit me and made me feel more alive than the past couple of days had. It was rejuvenating. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, feeling the cold pass through my nostrils and fill my lungs.
The grey sky above had never looked so beautiful before.
Just as this thought came to me, I felt a shiver run through my spine. The difference in temperature compared to the interior of the Tower was greater than I was expecting.
"Here", I heard Bruce say from the side as a blanket was placed on my lap to cover my legs, and another was throws over my shoulders. "We don't want you to catch a cold" he offered gently.
"I—", I started but had to clear by throat. "Thank you. I wasn't expecting to see you here".
He looked over the railing and on the expanding city below. "I wasn't planning on being here, but I saw that agent May brought you out here and thought I would join you". He then turned back towards me, with an unsure expression. "If that is okay?"
"Of course" I answered. I looked back at May only to see her retreating inside the building. Her smile and nod were all I needed to know she was only one call away. "Please, don't stand for me" I looked back at Bruce and motioned to him one of the seats placed here.
I rolled over, closer to where he was, and twisted back around so I would look out at New York.
The silence that followed wasn't the tense silence I was expecting to be met with everyone after the Revelation. Instead it was a comfortable silence, with two people just existing in another's space. There was nothing heavy, weighing on the atmosphere apart from the slight humidity in the air.
"I'm sorry" Bruce said out of the blue, his voice barely audible. I turned the chair around to face him better, not saying anything. "The way I reacted was uncalled for, it wasn't right. And I'm sorry for that".
I let the statement hung in the air for a bit before replying. "I can't say I wasn't hurt, 'cause I was. Mainly because you'd think that it was something I was making up. But I understand, Bruce. I do", I took his hand in mine and squeezed briefly. "I'm sorry I made you question our friendship".
"Oh, no" he quickly said. "You didn't make me question our friendship Skye, not at all. I was just blindsided and didn't know what to believe and what not. But there's no scenario where this would impact on what we have, as friends". He moved around and bend down to give me a hug. The hug, despite how awkward it was because of the position, was still so warm and wholesome, that I almost teared up. "I'm sorry I made you question whether you could tell me about something like this. I'm always here for you Skye, no matter what. And I want you to feel comfortable coming to me and not fearing my reaction".
"Thank you", I whispered in his ear, as I hugged him even closer.
"No worries, Shaky" he said lightheartedly, a small laughter escaping from both of our lungs at the nickname. "After all, I need to keep you around to make sure Stark doesn't do anything crazy. I swear, the programming you have added on J.A.R.V.I.S. that starts blasting Adele when he overworks is the best. I think he secretly likes it, but refuses to admit it".
"Please don't make me laugh", I said between gritted teeth, trying to hold it in. Thankfully it didn't take too long before I managed to compose myself. "Speaking of which, I have a new idea but I'm still not sure how to make it happen", I stage whispered at him as if it was a big secret.
He played along and leaned in. "Oh, do tell".
"Do you know where the place he keeps his main coffee stash is?"
By the time I had finished with my talk with Bruce, which we had resumed inside the building because of the constantly dropping temperature, it was getting late. Everyone else but Tony had joined us. Even Rogers made an appearance towards the end, and while he kept quiet most of the time, he didn't seem like he was uncomfortable.
We watched some movies, talked about everything and nothing and had and an actually really good time.
At some point, Clint and Bruce had left, with clear instructions about what to do, and had soon returned with a triumph smile on both of their faces. I also managed to vocally override some of J.A.R.V.I.S.' commands and set some new rules for certain situations.
So, when Adele started playing over the speakers, the moment the time reached 11 at night, I mentally smirked. Because I knew what was coming.
I was half-expecting Tony to come up here, demanding for answers and to turn things back to normal, but was surprised to see that he didn't. I was really hoping that this would make him at least appear, or talk to me, but it seemed that even this did not make the cut. At that I sighed. Seemed that only part of my plan had worked.
It was a while later when I declared I was gonna call it a night. Almost everyone made a move to stand and help, apart from Rogers —for which I didn't blame him—. "I'm good really, I can make it back on my own. Don't break this up on my account" I assured them. "I will tell Jar if I need help and he'll call for someone", and with that I rolled off.
It did take me a bit to get to my 'room'. I didn't wanna rush it, I liked the quiet of the corridors. When I eventually made it back, the lights turning on automatically the moment I stepped in, I noticed a laptop on the bed, with a paper resting on top.
I opened it to see Tony's childish scratches that he called letters.
— Give me my coffee back —
Neither a please, nor anything else. But it wouldn't have been Tony if there was. I smiled. It was a start.
Chapter 5: Not Quite Right, Not Quite ThereNotes:Howdie :) I hope you all are have had a great week so far! Thank you all for the support and the comments, I really appreciate them all ^^ Enjoy
All rights go to Marvel
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter TextCoulson's POV
It had been days since Skye was taken out of the S.H.I.E.L.D. hospital to an undisclosed location that I didn't have access to. May and Simmons were with her, and the updates I was getting were few and scarce.
I was at least very happy to hear that Skye had woken up and that her recovery seemed to be going according to plan. I was left 3 agents short, without counting Ward who had already been taken away for disciplinary action because of what happened during our encounter with the Asgardian artefact.
I let out a breath, and let my head rest in my hands. Things were not going great.
The team was spread out, we were forced to take a break, and my attempts to hunt down Quinn had been shut down by the Director himself. What is going on?, was my main thought for the past 5 days.
The only silver lining in this whole situation was the forced break that the team had to take. It was closing in on Christmas either way, so some time to recuperate would not hurt anyone. This time would also allow me some freedom to seek out Quinn. Because even if I couldn't find him, I felt that seeking him out would answer some of my questions.
Skye was working very closely with Fury and Hill for them to not want to seek the man out, which probably meant there was something larger going on. Something I could not pinpoint and it was driving me nuts. 'Cause it didn't make sense based on everything I knew so far for Hill to say no. And usually, when things didn't add up or didn't make sense, it meant that they were covering up for something. And Skye was the one that had made me start to question my 'trust the system' mentality.
I wanted so badly to ask May for help, but I had a feeling that she wouldn't approve or would report me. After all, from what I had witnessed in the Bus, she was very close to the girl. And if her being with Skye wherever she was, was any indication, then she was in on whatever they were trying to hide or cover up.
But I could still try to get some information out of her.
I heard the phone ring a couple of times before she picked up. "Hi Phil", and if the sound of her voice didn't calm me, I would be lying.
"Hey there, Melinda. How are you? How are things going on your end?" I heard her sigh on the other end of the phone.
"Things are going. Overall good, with some bumps, but Skye is showing signs of improvement. She's eager to get back in the field".
I could sense, regardless of the unknown distance, that something was bothering her. "You know you can talk to me, right?" I asked her.
She let out a breath. "Not about this Phil, I'm sorry. Orders comes from above", and that was enough for me to understand that my suspicions were not very far off. "I wish I could tell you", she added soon after and I truly believed her.
"That's okay", I tried not to sound hurt. I understood, but that didn't mean that I liked it. "I did want to see how you were, of course, but I meant to also ask you. The Director said that while you should be back with us in… less than a couple of weeks now, I still haven't really been updated on what will happen with Ward. But Hill sent over some agents' files for me to review for a potential addition to the team…" I let the sentence fade out. I wanted to see how she would complete it.
"I don't really know anything about that", she said, and I trusted her enough to believe that this was true. "What kind of agents has she recommended?"
"It hasn't really been a specific category. All of them know a bit of everything. Specialists, mainly, but with skills in other sections as well. One that seemed to stand out to me more than the rest is one Barbara Morse. It also says here that you scouted her, so I wanted to ask your opinion on her".
I heard her chuckle. "Well, what I can tell you for sure, is that if you call her Barbara, she will want to punch you in the face. But other than that, she's good. Really good. Does anything specific bother you? I hadn't really been very active before I joined the current group, so I can try to answer any questions you might have, but I don't know how much help I can be".
It was very easy, sometimes, to forget that May had been inactive as a specialist for about 4 years. Man, she made me feel old sometimes. I felt more rusted over than she did. True, I was in Communications, but still.
"Nah, it's nothing in particular. She has a stellar file. I was just confused 'cause she also seems to be able to pilot and has a degree in Biology and that made me wonder how long you and Simmons would be gone". I could at least try to fish for as much information as I could.
There was a small pause at her end. And while I couldn't see her, I could imagine her eyes darting on the side as she contemplated her answer. "Things are going according to plan. I don't see why Simmons or myself should stay here for longer. The team could benefit from someone as varied as her. If I'm out, she or Skye can pilot, and if something happens to Simmons, maybe she can help Fitz figure something out. It's always good to have people who can help in other aspects, like Skye with her hacking", she ended up saying.
"That's good to hear. Thank you Melinda, I really appreciate your opinion. Say hi to Skye and Simmons from me", I said before hanging up.
There was something about her answer that I couldn't exactly name. Not everyone would be able to tell, but I knew her for way too long. I would like to say I detected a… uncertainty in her answer. Almost like she was measuring what she said.
I couldn't help but notice that she didn't mention Ward at all. Did she know something about how long his punishment would be or if he'd even return to the team? That should have to go through me. But maybe it was wishful thinking on her part, after all she was very upset on Skye's end when the whole Flashback episode happened because of him.
There was something I was missing there, but once again, I didn't know exactly what. Not that it really mattered. If she wanted to tell me she would, and I couldn't begin to start mistrusting Mel. In my line of work, I had a lot of people that I had to trust with my life, but with her it was different.
I felt the edges of my mouth rise thinking back to all of our missions together. Back from when I met her, to when we were working together when Romanoff came in the organisation. Our missions with her…
What was…
There…
Why do I feel like there is something I am missing?, I thought. I was, for a moment, so sure that there was something else. Something that came after Romanoff, something else that bonded us. But it was all blurry. No, blurry wouldn't be the right word.
There was nothing.
Nothing that would excuse that longing and simultaneously happiness that I felt in my heart. There was pain there too, emotional pain. I felt it at the part where Loki's spear had pierced through my heart and when I looked down, I found myself rubbing that part unconsciously. I had to blink a handful of times and force my hand away from the spot.
Clearing my throat, I stood up from my desk and moved towards the closet in the room. I put in the code that only I knew, to open it up, and as soon as the clicking sound of the lock coming undone was heard, I pushed the doors open, staring at the photo of Quinn that I had pinned.
The now-empty closet filed with locations, maps, photos, and connections between everything. Quinn and Centipede were somehow connected and I was going to find out how.
May's POV
I looked at my screen after the talk I had with Phil. It wasn't the first time that we talked about what had been going on, but this one seemed different from the rest.
I shook my head. If it was something, I was sure that he would come to me. After all, I thought and I looked up to where Skye was sitting on the balcony with Simmons just talking, there are other things to focus on right now.
I felt a presence coming from behind and standing a few feet on the side. "Tell me you are not here to tell me you and Captain need to leave on a mission", I said without even looking.
"Of course not" Natasha said and moved a bit closer to me. "I just finished talking with Fury, a conference call we had with Bruce involved. We should be able to leave tomorrow, if that's what Skye wants".
I nodded at that. Not really letting the two girls out of my sight, always standing guard. A hand was placed on my shoulder, and I was force to look away from the two of them and focus back on my current company. An eyebrow was raised in a silent question.
"She's not going to disappear you know" Natasha nodded towards the balcony and I turned towards it as well. Simmons must have said something funny 'cause Skye was trying to hold in her laughter and failing miserably, while the doctor was playfully hitting her on the shoulder.
"She's here, she's alive, and she's safe. You need to stop worrying as much" Clint said from my other side as he jumped down from one of the vents he had disappeared to.
I scoffed. "As if you don't worry just as much, mister 'I watch better from above'. Don't think I don't know about your daily and nightly excursions on the vents. I'm going to tell Pepper, and she will put security measures on the vents and you'll die one of those days".
I heard the heels before I heard the voice. "Oh, I have already done that", Pepper joined us from the side. "I just make sure that J.A.R.V.I.S. shuts everything down as soon as Clint here starts roaming above. I'd hate for the alarm systems to be turned on in the middle of the night, wouldn't you agree?"
After spending a few days with her on the time off we had some weeks back, and the time I was spending with her now, I could understand how Skye formed the relationship she had with her, and I was growing very fond of the woman. "What is this?" I asked as soon as I noticed the four of them exchanging a small glance, however subtle it was. I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes at the realisation. "I don't need an intervention".
"Of course you don't", Natasha was quick to reply. The slight sarcasm in her voice had me turn towards her once more. I glared at her and she didn't miss the meaning behind it. Do you really wanna go there?
"Look", Pepper was quick to intervene. "We can all agree that we want what is best for Skye, at least, correct?", she said with the voice she used with Stark, what Skye called her 'mom' voice. "And we want her safe and healthy, right?", she added when no-one replied. Only when we all had nodded did she continue. "And she is all of that here. This is the most secure building in the world, or at least that's what Tony claims. If not, it's at least in the top 3. We have J.A.R.V.I.S. on constant alert, the doors are sealed at night and they are reinforced with bulletproof glass. Should anything happen, 9-1-1 is on speed dial, as well as 5 different security teams and I'm pretty sure Skye has added Director Fury's personal number on the list. Skye is the most protected she can be right now", her voice was never lifting too high in case the duo at the balcony heard us.
"She's right", Clint chimed in. "You, standing guard at all times is not gonna help her. You need to rest. You can take a break" he offered and placed his hand in turn, on my other shoulder.
I sighed deeply, and for the first time I felt the exhaustion slip in. No, I looked back out. There's no way I am letting her out of my sight.
"Look, while I appreciate all of your concerns, I am doing okay", I took a step letting the others know to drop their hands. "Really. There are others that are still dealing with things", I pointedly looked at Pepper. Turning around, I went to one of the sofas looking outside and sat there. There were some faint murmurs from where the three of them were, but I didn't pay them any mind.
Not too long after, there was a dip on the cushion next to me. And I didn't need to look to see who it was.
Natasha and I sat quietly, just looking outside at the slowly darkening sky. Simmons just acquired another blanket that she made sure to throw over Skye's shoulders to warm her up. "I don't want to talk about it" I said after what must have been the 15 minute mark. Natasha was thinking too loud and it was distracting.
She said nothing at that. Just continued to sit there.
"Did Skye ever tell you how we found her?", she eventually broke the silence after another handful of minutes.
I turned my eyes towards her and saw a somber expression on her face. I shook my head.
"We had been chatting for a while. A few months through an encrypted message channel she created. Of course she wouldn't say where she was, just that she was 'fine'. Fine my ass", she started. "I thought I was getting closer to getting her to tell me her location, but Fury sent me undercover here, to keep an eye on Tony and his troubling behaviour. You see, his security measures had gone up and we couldn't get quite the same access as we used to". I chuckled. I knew some part of that story from Skye but she hadn't said a lot about her time before we met. "I got in, and then we went to Monaco".
"It was all over the news", I said. A guy had walked in the race track, started cutting cars the middle with something that looked like Stark's technology on his chest. "Stark managed to take him down".
She nodded, her eyes going a bit darker. "That's what the media showed". I was taken by surprise by the, dare I say, venom in her tone. "For the first time after about five and a half years I saw Skye. I watched from the Hôtel as she jumped in the racetrack, and started fighting against Whiplash. The realisation that it was her came not too long before she was thrown to the surrounding wall. Falling on the racetrack like a sack, not getting back up". Natasha's whole body was tense, her eyes staying the balcony. "The moment I found her again, I thought I lost her", she let a heavy, shuddering breath out.
"Then, after she was brought in, Clint became her S.O. He trained her, for a good year. She was training and she was safe. I had to leave for another undercover mission in Russia, I can't even remember what it was for. In the middle of it, I get a call from Clint. 'Skye has been compromised', he said", I scoffed. "I felt my heart stop in my chest", her gaze turned on me and I saw the tears gathered but not spilled. "I know a thing or two about feeling guilty for not being there, however out or in your control that could have been"
I felt my breath catch in my throat. The understanding I saw reflected at her hurt.
"You couldn't have predicted what would happen. What happened is not on you. She is a very capable agent, who knows the risks she's taking when she does. Can she be reckless sometimes? Yes. But that's not on you either. I, honestly, blame Clint for that", she said and paused. We both knew that he was listening in, but he didn't do anything. "That guilt, it's selfish. It comes from a place where you want to punish yourself because you cannot punish those responsible. But Skye doesn't need that. She wouldn't want you to feel guilty. She would just want you to be there because she loves you".
She reached over with her hand and intertwined her fingers with mine, giving me a tight squeeze never breaking the eye contact. "She's okay, she is alive and you can rest. You don't need to be standing as a silent guardian. You need to rest" she gently prompted.
I looked up towards the vents, where Clint was hiding away and saw him nod slightly. "You both are hypocrites" I said with a wet taint on my chuckle. "But I see you", I lowered my eyes back at Natasha. "I just don't know if I can come to terms with it yet".
"That's okay", she smiled at me. "In our line of work, things get precarious often, and with Skye there seems to be a pattern of her getting herself into trouble more so than others. It's like wherever she goes, danger follows. So, you need to get used to it, 'cause you cannot always be there to protect her, no matter how much you want to".
I let Natasha side hug me as we watched the sun set beyond the two girls. And for the first time in the past week, I felt a bit more relaxed.
Notes:Okay... so there was that. Sorry for the lack of action on the last few chapters, I don't know exactly when we will see a lot of action. I am more of the spontaneous kind of written, and while I have an idea about what's gonna happen, I still haven't figured out how to get there. So, consider yourselves warned :)
Also, I will try to keep to an about once per 2 weeks update. I have a pretty busy schedule atm, but I think I'll make it happen. So, until then...