"You ran into the wall yourself, why are you blaming me... Ouch~ I confess, I confess..."
"I just wrote it casually, to amuse the readers, how could I know a dignified Tribulation Transcending cultivator would actually be stupid enough to run headfirst into it... Ouch~ Not stupid, not stupid..."
"How do you want to die? How about a satisfying death... Ouch~"
"Later? You'll dare to do it again. Ouch~"
"Bang!" Chu Ge was stuck to the wall in a "T" shape, slowly sliding down.
Qiu Wuji clapped his hands, as if they were dusty, and said coolly, "Oh, your Golden Bell Shield is pretty good, you didn't even get hurt running into the wall."
Chu Ge was also a little surprised. He didn't feel any pain running into the wall. How could his Golden Bell Shield be so effective after only a short time of practice? Of course, to assert his authority, he still stubbornly insisted, "That's because Master taught me well. It can't compare to Master's graceful crashing into the stone gate; even crashing into the wall was so beautiful..." Qiu Wuji gritted his teeth: "You really think I wouldn't dare to beat you badly?"
"Hiss~ Stop pinching me, or my Golden Bell Shield will be fully developed..."
"This is good, it helps you train your Golden Bell Shield to defend against pinching." Qiu Wuji sneered, "I carefully reviewed the Golden Bell Shield technique. It says that there are different training methods for defending against sharp needles or blunt force blows. I've tailored a training method for you. Get up!" Chu Ge carefully got up: "What method?"
"Bang!"
A durian hit Chu Ge on the head.
Chu Ge: "?" Qiu Wuji crossed his arms and looked him up and down, quite satisfied. "Look," he said, "isn't this training both blunt force trauma and needle-piercing defense?"
Chu Ge: "..." The next moment, several durians surged from the corner, one hitting his stomach, another his back, rolling up and down.
"Pfft!" Chu Ge's eyes bulged out: "This is murder..."
Before he could even utter the words "husband," two more durians slammed into his shoulders with two "thump-thump" sounds.
"Don't move," Qiu Wuji said with a smile. "If you writhe from the durians, you'll lose the point of training. So you must remain still and use your invincible shield to endure it. If even one of these three durians rolls off your head and shoulders, you'll have to endure half an hour longer. If all three roll off, you'll be pricked all night." Chu Ge didn't feel pain, but his whole body felt like it was being bitten by countless ants. He gritted his teeth and said, "Don't think I don't know anything! Are you using your position to torture me?" Qiu Wuji rolled his eyes at the ceiling: "I am the one undergoing tribulation, you're just a fabricated storyteller. Think carefully about whose advice you should follow when it comes to training." Chu Ge: "..." Qiu Wuji continued, "Even if the durians stop rolling off your stomach, you still have to hold onto the ones on your head and shoulders."
"Why is that?"
"To train your balance and stability." Qiu Wuji pointed to the messy furnishings in the room: "These past two days..." "When you practice your movements, do you feel unstable if you speed up even slightly? You're prone to twisting and falling?" She moved the coffee table slightly. "You knocked the coffee table askew, didn't you feel it?" Chu Ge started to think it made sense and asked, "Does that mean I have to practice horse stance to train my lower body?"
"That's a method for ordinary martial artists. We don't need such a crude method."
"...What kind of foreign method is this durian-balancing exercise?"
"It's just to help you find your balance. You're energetic, so once you find this feeling, it will leave a mental imprint, allowing you to self-regulate your body. I don't think it will take long. Others are looking for muscle memory, you're looking for a mental imprint. As for muscle training itself, the Golden Bell Shield can provide that, and running also has its benefits." Chu Ge listened, increasingly impressed by the professionalism. He looked at the durians on his shoulders with a bitter expression, then at the one still rolling around on his stomach, and remained silent, his head stiff.
He couldn't even move his head; there was still one on his head.
Seeing him obediently balancing the durian, Qiu Wuji turned her head, a subtle smile playing on her lips.
Just kidding.
Well, not entirely. It did have an effect, but there were other ways to do it, so this wasn't necessary.
The reason I used this method... is because someone said kneeling on a durian is a good way to teach a man a lesson. Kneeling is one thing, but balancing a durian on your head is fine, right...? Qiu Wuji, in a good mood, tidied the room: "You've bumped into everything, it's crooked and messy, it's awful. How can you live here like this?" Chu Ge didn't really think that a slightly crooked coffee table or a messy item on it was a big deal, but seeing Qiu Wuji tidying things up softened his heart. He didn't want to speak, and even the durian on his head seemed to soften.
Of course, Qiu Wuji didn't tidy up much manually. Most places were spotless and tidy after a scan with her divine sense. In a good mood, Qiu Wuji even cleaned the curtains that hadn't been washed in a long time, the windows that hadn't been wiped, and the walls and ceiling. Even the light bulbs were shining brightly, and the whole room was sparkling clean and smelled fresh.
Without comparing, Chu Ge hadn't realized how tidi his room was until now. He'd initially thought his own place was fairly clean, but now it suddenly felt like his previous living space was practically a doghouse.
Qiu Wuji stroked his chin, looked around for a moment, and shook his head. "Too tacky."
Chu Ge said helplessly, "I never wrote anything about how ethereal your room was."
"That's precisely why it's ethereal. If you had written something, it would be hopeless."
Chu Ge: "..."
"I'll go get a couple of plants tomorrow. The jasmine downstairs is doing well, and the roses are growing nicely too..."
"No, those are public property. You can't pick them."
Qiu Wuji asked curiously, "These are considered public property?"
"Yeah, either go pick some wild ones from the countryside, or just buy potted plants. Simple and straightforward." Qiu Wuji knew about buying potted plants, but he thought it was a waste. She thought for a moment, then shook her head: "I'll go to the outskirts tomorrow. Also, buy some Xuan paper..."
"Why buy that?"
"To get some calligraphy and paintings. I know they're probably quite expensive, but I can write them myself, okay?"
Chu Ge was in tears: "Even if you lived for ten thousand years..."
Qiu Wuji glared.
Chu Ge immediately changed his tune: "Well, even if you're all-rounders, able to write and paint yourself, you still need to get them framed. This is just a rented room, we can make do, why bother..."
"Who wants to make do with you?" Qiu Wuji said: "This is my own place, at least it should make me feel comfortable."
Chu Ge paused, then suddenly grinned: "You're right."
Qiu Wuji could tell what he was thinking from his expression, and turned back to his room irritably: "I'm going to play on the computer, you keep going. Practicing is for yourself, no slacking off."
"Okay, okay, I know..." Chu Ge felt strange, sometimes like he was raising a daughter, and sometimes like he had a mother.
So, all things considered, is that what you call a wife?
Hmm, I can't say that, or I'll get hammered to death.
Before Qiu Wuji even reached her room, the doorbell rang.
She paused, startled: "Did you order takeout? Or is it the gas delivery?"
"It's only been a short time, why would I need to change the gas..." Chu Ge's words were cut short by the sound of a key being inserted into the door, which opened abruptly.
Chu Ge: "?"
Qiu Wuji: "?" Zhang Qiren stepped inside: "I forgot I didn't leave my key, haha, Chu... uh?"
He instinctively stepped back, looked up at the house number, then at the key in his hand, his eyes filled with confusion.
He hadn't gone to the wrong place! But why did this house look different, and smell so good...?
Then he saw a very beautiful woman staring at him with an unfriendly expression, her eyes filled with murderous intent.
This woman looked familiar, the "female fan" who appeared at the banquet earlier.
Zhang Qiren's eyes flickered, and he saw Chu Ge standing there dumbfounded, covered in durian.
Confirmed to have slept with fans!
Zhang Qiren said with deep sorrow, "I thought I was the one who betrayed the class, but I never imagined that you were the one who truly betrayed the revolution!"