Chapter 130: No Less Than Subjugating a Demon Kings Army General"...W-Wait! This isn't right, is it?!" Although Aquahad low intelligence, her intuition was sharp enough to sense something was off. "Why are you the one sacrificing your purity? I want to live with Wiz too... No, I want to live with Darkness too! It's lonely living alone! What if a ghost appears at night?!""You're a goddess; ghosts would only be purified on the spot if they saw you. What are you afraid of?!" Haru ruthlessly pushed away Aqua's face as she leaned in, then looked at Darkness. "Darkness, you don't mind, right? Staying in one room with me and Wiz.""...Haah... haah..." Darkness finally looked up, her face flushed with two streaks of crimson, her eyes hazy as she looked at Haru. "To be squeezed into the same narrow room... with a man... and an Undead... Not only must I endure moral condemnation, but I also have to constantly worry about being corrupted by some unknown evil power? This... this kind of arrangement full of a sense of immorality and crisis... Haru, you truly are an irreredeemable scum! Please... please take me in!""See, she agreed." Haru looked at Aqua righteously."Waaaaah! Haru, you big liar! You just want to hog two beauties all for yourself! You scum! Pervert! Axis Cultists!!"Aqua was so angry she started stomping around on the spot, pointing at Haru and cursing with teary eyes."So noisy. If you keep shouting, I'll replace all your booze with plain water."Haru's single sentence was a finishing blow. He then pulled along the still-shivering Wiz and the excited-looking Darkness, walking straight toward the last room."...Um, Mr. Lin Jin, is it really okay?" Wiz asked in a low voice. "I feel like Lady Aqua's gaze... is like she's trying to curse us.""It's fine. With her IQ, any curse will only bounce back onto herself." Haru calmly opened the door, waving back at Aqua who was still throwing a fit at the end of the hallway. "Goodnight, Lady Goddess. Remember not to kick off your blankets when you sleep alone, or no one will pour you hot water if you catch a cold.""Haru—!! You'd better remember this—!! Waaaah, I hate it here, I want to go back to Axel—!!"Accompanied by Aqua's miserable wails, Haruslammed the door shut with a bang. The world was finally quiet... probably.The air inside the room seemed to have solidified into some kind of thick gel, so heavy it was almost impossible to breathe.Two single beds, emitting a faint woody fragrance, were placed side-by-side against the wall, separated only by a bedside table less than fifty centimeters wide.Outside the window, the lingering echoes of Aqua's shrill "Haru, you big liar" still resonated in the night sky. Inside the room, three people were caught in an awkward standoff worthy of being recorded in the annals of Adventurer history.Haru stood between the two beds, his gaze sweeping back and forth between the pristine white sheets and his two female teammates.His brain was spinning at eight hundred revolutions per second:Logically, as a gentleman (self-proclaimed), he should generously offer to sleep on the floor or go feed the mosquitoes in the hallway.But thinking about how those Axis Cultists had showered him with coarse salt at the city gate earlier, and how his back was still stinging with pain, he felt that if he didn't lie on a soft mattress, his soul would leave his body tonight out of sheer grievance.Moreover, his scum soul was whispering frantically in his ear:(Hey, Haru, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity! One is a former Demon Kings Army General, a hot-bodied but weak-willed Lich; the other is the Royal Capital's top Great Noble, a Crusader with heavy masochistic tendencies... With this setup, you're actually hesitating over how to split the beds?!)However, seeing Wiz's expression as if she were about to cry, Haru found that his pitiful bit of conscience was actually still putting up a deathbed struggle."...Um, two beds, three people." Haru broke the dead silence, his voice sounding exceptionally abrupt in the empty room. "This is an extremely severe logistical allocation problem, the difficulty of which is no less than subjugating a Demon Kings Army General. Do you... have any constructive suggestions?"Wiz jumped like a cat whose tail had been stepped on. Her beautiful pale purple eyes darted around anxiously, her hands tightly interlaced."S-Sorry! It's all because a useless Lich like me had the nerve to follow along that Mr. Lin Jin and Miss Darkness are in this predicament!" Wiz's voice was as thin as a mosquito's buzz, with a clear sob. "I... I actually don't need to sleep! Really! As an Undead, I just need to hang myself up in a corner... No, I just need to sit in a chair and meditate all night! Please use the beds, both of you, and don't mind me at all!""What the hell is 'hanging yourself up'? Are you a bat?!" Haru couldn't help but retort. "And isn't your body still turning a bit transparent because of that salt-sprinkling ritual just now? If you don't rest properly, you might really become a ghost of this inn by tomorrow morning.""Waaah... Mr. Lin Jin is so kind... even though I'm just a useless failure who only loses money..."Wiz was moved to tears, even starting to emit a strange aura known as the 'Holy Mother's Light,' making Haru's guilt even heavier.Just then, Darkness, who had been keeping her head down with her body trembling at a slight frequency, finally spoke.She slowly raised her head. Her originally heroic and pretty face was now covered in an unnatural flush, and her eyes held a chilling fervor."...Two beds... three people... one is a male, one is a fragile female, and another is an evil Undead..." Darkness's voice was raspy and hurried, as if reciting some dark scripture. "Haru... you specifically emphasized two beds. Could it be that you mean, for the sake of fairness, we must decide ownership through some cruel competition? For example... the loser must sleep at the winner's feet, acting as a human footstool? Or... do you want to use your authority as the leader to force Wiz and me to share one bed, while you're on the other, monitoring us all night with the eyes of someone looking at spoils of war?!""I never said that! How on earth did your imagination leap to a human footstool?!"Haru retorted loudly, but his confidence was inexplicably lacking."Haah... haah... this sense of being driven into a corner... this guilt of repeatedly dancing on the edge of morality..." Darkness gripped her breastplate tightly, her nails making a screeching sound against the metal. "Haru! Stop pretending to be decent! Just give the order! Whether it's making me squeeze together with Wiz, or making me sleep on the cold floor to receive your late-night inspections, I... I will absolutely never submit (hurry up and do it)!!"Looking at his two female teammates—one about to cry her eyes out and the other about to die of pleasure—Haru let out a deep sigh.He finally understood that in this party, trying to solve problems with common sense and democracy was a luxury in itself."Alright, both of you shut up." Haru exerted his authority as the (pseudo) captain, pointing at the bed on the left. "Wiz, that bed is yours. This is a captain's order. No refusing, no meditating, and definitely no hanging yourself up. If you dare turn into ash in the middle of the night, I'll dispose of all the Magic items in your shop as trash.""Y-Yes! Understood!" Wiz was so startled she immediately sat up straight, crawled onto the bed like a good girl, and wrapped herself up like a silkworm cocoon.Haru then looked at the bed on the right, took a deep breath, and tried to make his voice sound calm (though his heart was racing): "As for this bed... Darkness, didn't you just mention sharing? To save space and to prevent you from rushing out in the middle of the night to find cultists to spray salt on you due to excessive delusions, this bed will be shared by you and me. Of course, a Wall of Sighswill be built with pillows in the middle. If you dare cross that line, I'll... I'll send you back to Chris!""—!!!"Darkness's pupils suddenly constricted, and her whole body froze as if struck by lightning."Sharing... together... a wall of pillows... severe punishment after crossing the line..." Darkness let out a gasp that sounded like she was about to lose her breath, her whole body slumping limply onto the bed. "Haru... you... you true scum... this sense of taboo, like a newlywed couple... are you trying to kill me..."Looking at Darkness, who had already fallen into a deep state of self-intoxication, Haru wiped the cold sweat from his forehead and swore to himself: Tonight, absolutely, definitely, I cannot close my eyes.
Chapter 131: Ambiguous AtmosphereLate at night, inside Room 3 of the 'Waters Calm' inn, moonlight spilled across the wooden floor through thin curtains.The room was so quiet that only Wiz's steady breathing could be heard—the former Demon Kings Army General was currently wrapped up like a giant silkworm cocoon, sleeping soundly in another bed, occasionally muttering vague sleep talk about interest rates or expired magic items.However, in the other bed, the atmosphere was tense to the extreme.Haru lay flat on one side of the bed, his body as stiff as a piece of aged cured meat just dug out of a cellar.To his right was the 'Wall of Sighs' made of two stacked long pillows, and on the other side of that wall was the source of his destined insomnia tonight.Darkness, who usually wore heavy armor and looked heroic (and perverted), was currently lying on her side on the other side of the pillow pile.She had changed into a thin silk nightgown. Since the sizes provided by the inn clearly hadn't considered figures that were 'out of specification' even by Crimson Demon Clan standards, the fabric was stretched nearly transparent in certain places, the edges pressing tightly against her skin to outline curves that would make anyone's blood boil.(...This isn't just a foul anymore; this is a crime. This is a cruel and unusual public execution of my sanity!)Haru screamed inwardly, his eyes fixed on the wood grain of the ceiling, trying to distract himself by counting the lines.To his surprise, Darkness—who usually rolled around in excitement at the mere mention of being humiliated or treated roughly—was actually surprisingly quiet right now.From the other side of the pillow pile came the sound of slight, somewhat rapid breathing.Haru stole a glance out of the corner of his eye and found Darkness clutching the edge of the quilt tightly, curled into a ball.Her pretty face, which could usually discuss perverted hobbies in public without changing expression, was now so red it looked like it might bleed, and even the tips of her ears were a tempting shade of pink."...Lin, Haru." Darkness's voice was as faint as a mosquito's buzz, carrying an unprecedented timidity and tremor. "Are... are you asleep?""The only people who could sleep in this environment are probably that Intellectual Disabled Goddess next door or the Lich lady over here," Harureplied grumpily, his voice a bit hoarse."...I-I'm sorry." Darkness shrank further into the quilt, her chest heaving more violently due to nervousness. "I clearly... clearly simulated this scenario of being forcibly possessed by a scumleader countless times in my head, I even prepared the lines for begging for mercy... But, but actually lying in the same bed as you, feeling your body heat and breath... I-I found that my body is actually shaking...""That's only natural! That was your delusion; this is reality!" Haru rolled over, facing the pillow wall. "Men in reality aren't like those monsters in your fantasies who only know how to drool. Are you scared now? If you're scared, then hurry up and close your eyes to sleep, otherwise I really will cross this wall."—!" Darkness flinched like a startled fawn, but immediately following that, a flicker of struggling light—a mix of fear and anticipation—flashed in her moist eyes."...Scared... Yes, I am very scared." Darkness turned her head and looked at Haru across the pillows, her gaze revealing a nearly self-abusing honesty. "But this sense of fear, so real it makes my fingertips tingle... it's heavier than all the delusions I've experienced in the past twenty-plus years... Haru, if it's you... if it's you, even if you really cross over, I probably... probably would only accept it while crying..."After saying this, Darkness seemed to have exhausted all her strength. She shut her eyes tightly, her long eyelashes trembling uneasily, looking like someone ready to be taken but scared to death.Looking at the face so close to him—exquisite as a work of art yet written all over with 'please bully me'—and that hot body heaving under the moonlight, Haru felt a rush of heat surge to his head.(Calm down, Haru! She's a noble! She's a companion! She's Chris's friend! If you actually do it, Kazuma will definitely use Lurk to sneak up behind you and stab you tomorrow morning!)Just as Haru's reason and instinct were fighting a frantic battle, a extremely loud, dull thud of a heavy object hitting the floor suddenly came from the room next door, followed by Aqua's highly piercing howl:"Waaaaah—! A cockroach! There's a flying cockroach—! Haru! Kazuma! Come save me!!"Then came the sound of banging on the door; clearly, a certain goddess was attempting to violently dismantle the wall connecting the two rooms.The atmosphere, which had been so ambiguous it was about to explode, vanished in an instant, washed away by Aqua's idiot-filled screams."...That idiot." Haru covered his face in agony and sighed deeply, all his impulses turning into a sense of helplessness at this moment.Darkness also seemed to snap out of it, slumped on the pillow looking somewhat exhausted. A flash of regret crossed her eyes, but it was mostly a sense of relief, like having survived a disaster."...Pfft, haha." Darkness suddenly laughed softly. "I'm so sorry, Haru. It seems even the gods don't intend for us to proceed smoothly tonight.""I'd rather not have a god like that." Haru sat up grumpily, looking at Wiz who was still squirming in the quilt and the continuous banging on the door. "Alright, stop being in heat, Darkness. Go put your clothes on. If we let that idiot barge in and see us like this, rumors about an Eris cultists and a black-haired Adventurer performing cult rituals in a hot spring inn will spread throughout the city tomorrow."Accompanied by a loud bang enough to make the entire inn tremble, the not-so-thick wooden partition connecting Room 3 and Room 4 collapsed under the impact of Aqua's [Sacred Break]—which was actually just [Idiot Brute Strength].Amidst the flying wood chips and Dust, that Intellectual Disabled Goddess in her blue frilly dress crawled through the hole, clutching a wet pillow with her face covered in tears.However, when her large eyes—clear but obviously not containing much intelligence—saw the scene before her, time seemed to stand still.Under the moonlight, Haru was half-sitting on the bed, while Darkness, wearing a semi-transparent silk nightgown and radiating a dangerous blush, was curled up on the other side of the pillow wall in an extremely ambiguous posture.Not only were the two sharing a bed, but the atmosphere had clearly reached an immoral edge where they were just one step away from the finish line."...Waaaaah! I knew it! I knew it!" Aqua froze for two seconds, then let out a scream a hundred times more tragic than when she saw the cockroach. She pointed at Haru, her finger trembling like she was carding cotton. "Haru! You irreredeemable scum! Pervert! Public enemy of the Axis Order! While this Goddess was next door battling an evil flying monster (cockroach), you were here with this big-breasted pervert knight performing this immoral, irrational, and possibly world-ending obscene ritual!!""Who's performing an obscene ritual?! Is your brain filled with sparkling wine?!" The veins on Haru's temples throbbed as if they were about to burst. He instinctively grabbed a nearby pillow to cover his chest (though he should have been covering Darkness). "Also, that was a wall! You actually tore down the wall! Are you the reincarnation of a demolition crew?!""I'm not listening, I'm not listening! You must have been brainwashed by Darkness's evil aura! Boohoo, how terrifying, this party has completely fallen!" While babbling nonsense, Aqua dived like a drowning person into the arms of Wiz, who had just been woken up and was still in a daze. "Wiz! Save me! Haru is going to turn into an Orc! The way he looked at me just now was as fierce as if he wanted to sell me to slave traders for liquor money!""L-Lady Aqua... please calm down..." Wiz was hit so hard she almost lost her breath. Immediately after, Aqua's tears, filled with high-level sacred energy, began to pour onto Wiz like a fountain.!! Ow ow ow ow! Lady Aqua! Your tears! Your tears are purifying me!" Wiz cried out in pain. Because Aqua's emotions were extremely intense, the purification power of those tears was comparable to concentrated sulfuric acid. Wiz's body began to turn transparent the moment it touched the tears, even emitting wisps of white smoke. "Help... Mr. Lin Jin... I'm going to disappear... I'm going to turn into air..."Haru looked at Wiz, who was about to ascend to heaven thanks to Aqua's antics, then at Darkness, who had fallen into some higher level of delusion because she was caught red-handed and was hugging her quilt while making strange giggling sounds, and finally thought about the ambiguous atmosphere just now that would have finally allowed him to say goodbye to his virginity (probably)...At that moment, something inside Haru snapped completely.He stood up expressionlessly, radiating a scum aura that made the air temperature drop by five degrees.He strode behind Aqua, who was rubbing herself against Wiz, and grabbed Aqua's back collar like he was picking up a squawking duck."Eh? L-Haru? What are you doing? Your eyes are so scary! I'm a goddess! The one who bestows blessings upon you—waaaaah!"Haru completely ignored Aqua's struggles. He carried the Intellectual Disabled Goddess and walked straight toward the door of the next room (since the wall was already open, he just stepped through the hole).He kicked open the door to the room where the two PTSD patients were staying. At this time, Kazumaand Dust were huddled back-to-back under their quilt, trembling from the sound of the wall being demolished.
Chapter 132: A Bit Awkward"Kazuma, Dust, since you two are so well-coordinated, you might as well take this too."Haru said coldly, then exerted force with his arm, drawing a perfect parabola."Get lost, Intellectual Disabled Goddess!""Waaaaah—!"Accompanied by a scream from Aqua, she slammed heavily onto Kazuma and Dust's stomachs in a spread-eagle position."Puh-ugh—!" Kazuma almost threw up his dinner."What is it?! Have the Orcs broken in?! Help—!!"Dust let out a scream like a slaughtered pig.Haru brushed the Dust off his hands, closed the door behind him, and even thoughtfully added a [Lockdown] spell from the outside.He returned to Room 3, looked at the giant hole in the wall, and casually moved the cabinet over to block it.Dead silence finally returned to the room.Wiz was slumped on the bed, her body showing a translucent sense of weakness, gasping for air;And Darkness... she was staring fixedly at Haru with a fanatical gaze filled with admiration, awe, and a 'hurry up and ravage me' intensity."...Phew." Haru sat back on the edge of the bed and looked at Darkness, giving her a standard scumsmile that made her whole body tremble. "Alright, Darkness. Now, no one can disturb us. You said earlier... that even if I crossed this wall, you would only accept it while crying, right?""—!!" Darkness let out a blissful cry of distress and buried herself directly into the pillow.The room fell back into an eerie and heavy silence, with only the moonlight silently flowing over the messy bedding.Wiz had completely fallen into a coma by now, her translucent body flickering in and out of view under the moonlight, occasionally letting out a weak murmur that sounded like some ancient distress signal.In the next room, Aqua's crying and shouting, isolated by Haru's [Lockdown] spell, turned into a rhythmic muffled thud, sounding more like a sleep-inducing background noise instead.Haru sat on the edge of the bed, looking at Darkness, who was curled up under the covers, staring at him with only a pair of watery eyes showing.The scum soul in his heart was expanding at an unprecedented rate.(Since you usually enjoy fantasizing about being treated roughly by a scumbag leader like me, and even take pleasure in it... then, if I actually put it into action, what kind of expression will you make?)The corners of Haru's mouth curled up slightly, revealing an aggressive smile that made Darknessinstantly hold her breath.He slowly reached out his hand, and extremely slowly, inch by inch, he grabbed the Wall of Sighsstanding between them—those two long pillows that symbolized the final line of moral defense."Darkness, you said just now that as long as I cross this wall, you'll accept it while crying, right?"Haru's voice was very low, carrying a magnetic quality that made one's spine tingle."—!!" Darkness's body gave a violent jolt, and those already extremely rule-breaking curves rose and fell sharply under her silk pajamas.Haru swept his hand suddenly, knocking those two pillows directly off the bed."The line of defense is gone." Haru followed through by crossing that invisible boundary, leaning forward and enveloping Darkness within his shadow.The distance between the two was so close they could smell each other's faint scent—Darkness's was a strange mixture of metallic coldness and feminine softness."...Lin, Haru... You, you really crossed over..."Darkness's voice trembled so much it was almost out of tune.The grand declarations she usually had on her lips—about being ravaged and treated like a slave—seemed to be completely frozen in her throat at this moment.In her eyes, which were usually filled with anticipation, a layer of watery mist called 'timidity' actually emerged for once.Haru extended a finger and gently tilted Darkness's chin up, forcing her to look directly into his eyes."What's wrong? Where's that usual energy? Haven't you always longed to be treated however I want by a scum Adventurer like me in a late-night inn?" Haru's finger felt the startling heat of her skin. "Now, Wiz is unconscious, and Aqua is locked up; no one can save you. So... as payment for all your previous teasing, where should I start enjoying this trophy?""Ugh... Ooh...!" Darkness let out a short moan, her fingers gripping the corner of the quilt turning white from the force, her whole body like a taut bow that could snap at any moment. "This... this merciless gaze... this tone as if you're picking out merchandise... Lin, Haru... you really are... the worst... haah..."Although she was still saying these things, Haruclearly felt Darkness's body shrinking into the covers—it was the biological instinct of retreating when facing a predator.(As expected, this woman is just a pervert with a big mouth. Once things get serious, she's more innocent than anyone.)Haru maliciously went a step further, his whole body almost pressing down on Darkness, his warm breath fanning across her neck."Since you're so expectant, let's start by stripping away your self-respect." Haru leaned into her ear and whispered in a voice only the two of them could hear, "Listen closely, Darkness. From now on, you're not allowed to close your eyes, you're not allowed to beg for mercy, and you're certainly not allowed to show that disgusting excited expression. I want you to feel every coming second clearly as an ordinary woman. If you dare to pass out, I'll turn your current appearance into a poster and plaster it all over Axel's Adventurers Guild."!! Turn... turn it into a poster?! Plaster it all over the Guild?!"Darkness's pupils dilated suddenly; this level of public execution shame had clearly exceeded her fantasy threshold.Her breathing became extremely chaotic, and tears finally burst from her eyes—tears that were a mixture of extreme shame, fear, and some unspeakable pleasure."...So, so scum... Haru... you devil... ugh... please, please be a little gentler..."Just as Haru was preparing to further test this Crusader's limits, a pathetic cough suddenly came from the other end of the bed."Cough, cough... Um... Mr. Lin Jin... although I'm sorry to interrupt your punishment time... I, I really seem to be disappearing... Can, can you spare me a little essence... or just any kind of evil energy..."Wiz's translucent hand was weakly clutching the hem of Haru's clothes, and that pitiful look instantly made the scum atmosphere in the room extremely awkward.
Chapter 133: SandwichThe atmosphere in the room instantly shifted from the previous immoral ambiguity into a chaotic, evil experimental ground that was hard for any normal person to look at.Haru let go of the hand that was tilting Darkness's chin and turned to look at Wiz, who was about to turn into a cloud of pale blue mist at the foot of the bed.This former Demon Kings Army General and the gentlest (and most useless) lich in Axel was currently lying weakly on the bedding, her translucent little hands tightly clutching the corner of Haru's clothes. Her eyes, which usually held a certain maternal glow, were now blurry and helpless due to extreme weakness."...Mr. Lin Jin... I'm sorry... I really didn't mean to interrupt at this time... Ugh, I feel like my soul is evaporating like an expired magic potion..."Wiz's voice was so ethereal it sounded as if it were coming from another dimension.Haru gave a cold snort, then turned his head to look at Darkness, who was caught in a state of intertwined shame and expectation."Did you hear that, Darkness? Wiz needs Essence." Haru let out an extremely cruel (and heart-racing for Darkness) sneer. "As a qualified leader, I naturally cannot stand by and watch her die. But as punishment for your attempt to seduce me just now, I want you to stay right here by this collapsed Wall of Sighs and keep your eyes wide open—see clearly how I rescue this beautiful lich. You are not allowed to turn your head, close your eyes, or cover your face with your hands. Do you understand?""!!!" Darkness let out a gasp that almost tore her throat. She bit her lower lip hard, tears welling in her eyes, her entire body trembling violently from the shame of being publicly executed like this. "This... this feeling of being betrayed to my face... this humiliation of being treated like a transparent person... Haru, you... you really are a demon! Please... please make sure I see it clearly!"With that, this hardcore masochistic Crusaderactually widened her eyes, which were written with 'hurry up and break me,' and stared intently at Haru's every move.Haru ignored Darkness and turned around, grabbing Wiz's cold and almost intangible hand."Wiz, bear with it. This process of Essence supply might be a bit... intense.""Eh? In-intense? Wah—!"At Haru's signal, Wiz activated something like Drain, and Haru also forcibly gathered the mana and life force within his body to his fingertips, then poured it into Wiz's palm.Because this method of energy transmission was extremely crude and unrefined, Wiz's sensitive and fragile lich body instantly reacted violently.The moment her originally transparent skin came into contact with Haru's life force, it actually flushed with an alluring crimson. Her whole body twitched on the bed as if she had been electrocuted."Ha...! Ugh...! Mr. Lin Jin! That kind of thing... that kind of hot thing... is coming in...! It's too much... it's too much!"Wiz let out cries that didn't sound like she was being saved at all, but rather like some indescribable scene. She gripped Haru's shoulders tightly, her nails sinking deep into his flesh.Haru continued to increase the output with a blank expression, while simultaneously glancing at Darkness out of the corner of his eye.At this moment, Darkness was in an extremely dangerous state.Watching Haru and Wiz exchange life force in front of her, hearing Wiz's face-reddening gasps, that feeling of being completely ignored yet forced to watch the whole process—the loneliness and sense of immorality completely blew her sanity apart."...Ha... ha... How awful... how scum-like... Haru, you're actually doing this to another woman... right in front of me...!" Darkness's breathing became heavy, and her silk nightgown was already soaked with sweat, clinging tightly to her lovely body. "My body... my body is going to burn up too... why won't you give me some... why won't you give me some of that intense punishment too—!!""Shut up and just watch." Haru scolded without looking back. "This is your punishment. You're not allowed to interfere or participate. Just carry this despair of being neglected and watch until dawn.""Oooooh—!"Darkness let out a blissful cry and collapsed into a corner of the bed, her eyes staring blankly at the ceiling, clearly fallen into some high-level delusion she couldn't pull herself out of.On the other side, Wiz's body finally gradually regained its physical form.She slumped into Haru's arms with a flushed face, her eyes vacant and a faint, inexplicable smile on her lips, clearly having her brain short-circuited by the high-intensity Essence supply."...Phew, saved her." Haru wiped the cold sweat from his forehead, feeling a bit exhausted himself.He looked down at his hands; the depletion after the mana supply made him feel a bit unsteady on his feet.Although the previous operation was as fierce as a tiger, he knew better than anyone that in the world of 'KONOSUBA: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World!', a world full of accidents and idiots, the difficulty of properly losing one's virginity was probably no less than making Aqua learn how to save money or making Megumin give up Explosion Magic.(...Forget it, since I can't have the main course, I should at least take the full benefits of the dessert, right? This is my legal compensation as the leader, the Essence supply source, and the nanny for these problem children!)Haru's gaze became firm and filled with a certain resolve known as scum.He reached out. Due to his level-ups and the recent outburst, his strength was enough to easily push the heavy wooden beds of the inn.Screeeech—!Accompanied by the harsh sound of friction, Harupushed the two single beds tightly together, completely erasing the gap that symbolized the moral baseline."Alright, since the wall is down, there's no point in the beds being so far apart."Haru said righteously, then plopped down right at the junction of the two beds.He first looked to the left.Darkness was currently slumped there like a fish out of water.The sweat-soaked silk nightgown clung tightly to her curves. Due to extreme excitement and shame, her body temperature was now staggeringly high, and she emitted a heat like someone who had just stepped out of a sauna, carrying the scent of a young girl's sweat."...Ha... they're... they're together... Haru, you actually... while someone is watching (referring to the unconscious Wiz and the idiot next door)... forcibly pushed our beds together..." Darkness's vacant eyes once again burned with something called delusion. "Could this be... the conduct of a so-called Harem King? Treating me like a plaything... Oooooh!""Shut up, you heat source." Haru unceremoniously pressed his hand against Darkness's forehead, feeling the burning heat. "Your current state is too dangerous. Just stay still."Next, Haru looked to the right.Although Wiz had regained her physical form, her brain was clearly still in a crashed state due to the intense supply from earlier.Because of her lich constitution, even after recovering, her skin still carried a refreshing chill, like a piece of high-quality cold jade.Haru lay down naturally, right in the middle of the two.On the left was the burning-hot Darkness, constantly letting out strange gasps; on the right was the ice-cool beautiful lich Wiz, emitting a faint fragrance.This ultimate sensation of ice and fire made Haruunable to resist letting out a sigh of comfort."...Mr... Mr. Lin Jin?" Wiz regained a bit of consciousness. Feeling the strong aura of life coming from Haru beside her, she subconsciously curled into Haru's arms like a small animal seeking a heat source. Her cold cheek pressed against Haru's chest as she let out a comfortable murmur. "So warm... Mr. Lin Jin's scent... so peaceful...""!! Wi-Wiz! You evil lich! You actually took that spot first!" Seeing this, Darkness was so jealous she almost ground her teeth to pieces. She didn't care about shame anymore and flipped over, tightly hugging Haru's arm from the left, pressing that extremely illegal heavy sensation against him. "Haru! Since it's a punishment, you can't favor one over the other! I want... I want this feeling of humiliation from being forcibly confined by a scumleader too!"Haru was sandwiched tightly between two stunning beauties, his left hand touching a burning-hot body and his right hand touching ice-cool softness.(...Ah, is this heaven? Although I might go bankrupt tomorrow, at this moment, I feel like I'm already a winner in life.)Haru closed his eyes, enjoying this extremely unscientific, unprincipled, but also extremely enjoyable sandwich state. He even maliciously rubbed against Wiz's head and blew a breath into Darkness's ear."Everyone, be quiet. That's an order."The room finally fell silent, leaving only the intertwined breathing of the three people and the occasional despairing wail of Kazuma from next door.
Chapter 134: This Wave, a Guaranteed Profit!The morning sunlight pierced through the gaps in the tattered curtains, mercilessly stabbing at Haru's bloodshot eyes.Inside Room 3 of the [Waters Calm] inn, the air still held a lingering, indescribable sweetness—a mix of maiden's sweat and chilly magical power.Sporting two massive dark circles under his eyes that could rival Axel's specialty pandas, Haru slowly sat up while supporting his sore and aching waist.To his left, Darkness let out a satisfied whimper and rolled over.Having undergone the baptism of an 'Ice and Fire Sandwich' last night, the Crusader's skin now glowed with a healthy flush, and a highly suspicious smile of indescribable happiness hung on the corner of her mouth.To his right, Wiz also slowly opened her eyes.Having been nourished by Haru's essence all night, the beautiful Lich appeared radiant. Even her originally pale complexion had become crystal clear, and her entire being radiated a heart-stirring maternal glow."...G-Good morning, Mr. Lin Jin. Last night... thank you very much for taking care of me." Wiz lowered her head, her face flushing crimson as her index fingers fidgeted restlessly. "In the future... if I start becoming transparent again, can I... um... sleep together like last night?""...Don't say another word. Any more and I'll be reincarnating back due to mental exhaustion." Haruwaved his hand feebly.When Haru dragged his exhausted body to the inn's lobby to assemble, he witnessed an even more bizarre scene.Kazuma and Dust, the two severe PTSD patients, were currently sitting back-to-back in an extremely distorted posture. Their waists were even tied together tightly with a thick hemp rope, making them look like a pair of conjoined freaks who had just escaped from a laboratory.Their eyes were vacant, and they gripped their respective short swords tightly. At the slightest sign of movement in the surroundings, the two would simultaneously let out a shrill scream.What was most surprising, however, was Aqua.This Intellectual Disabled Goddess, who usually wouldn't stop until the world was turned upside down, was currently kneeling obediently at Kazuma's feet. Her hands were folded on her lap, her head bowed, and she didn't dare utter a single word.A paper talisman with the word'Sealed' written on it was stuck to her forehead (clearly Kazuma's handiwork). She radiated a Zen-like aura that said, 'I have attained enlightenment; please treat me as air.'"Hey, Kazuma, what on earth did you guys do to her last night?" Haru asked, his eyelid twitching."Nothing." Kazuma turned his head stiffly, his dead-fish eyes reflecting an indifference that had seen through the mortal world. "After being tortured by her healing magic for three hours, Dust and I decided to team up and let her experience the ultimate wrath of mortals. As for the specific details, it's better if you don't know. It wouldn't be good for your mental health."Just then, heavy footsteps echoed from behind the counter.The inn's landlady, her face darkened, stood before them holding a massive abacus and a bill so long it trailed on the floor."Good morning, esteemed Adventurers." The landlady's voice was as cold as the icy springs of Alcanretia. "The commotion in your room last night was so loud that even the The Guard on the next street thought the Demon Kings Army was attacking."She pointed to the ceiling upstairs that was on the verge of collapsing, and the massive hole connecting Room 3 and Room 4—a hole large enough for two Orcs to walk through side-by-side."Damaged partition walls, shattered furniture, bedding soaked in some unknown liquid, and the loss of revenue from over a dozen guests who checked out early this morning because of your screaming..." The landlady flicked the abacus beads frantically, producing a series of heart-stopping clicks."Rounding down the change, it's a total of one hundred thousand eris." The landlady slammed the bill against Haru's chest, revealing an extremely terrifying smile. "Will you pay now, or shall I send you directly to the city's Guard Station so you can spend the rest of your trip to the Water City in a cell?""One... One hundred thousand?!" Kazuma let out a pig-slaughtering shriek. "We haven't even started making money and we're already burdened with massive debt?! Haru! This is all Aqua's fault!""Waaaah! I don't want to go to jail! Haru! Use your despicable methods to think of something!"Aqua finally couldn't hold it in anymore. She clung to Haru's leg and began wailing loudly, conveniently wiping her snot onto his pants.Haru looked at the bill for one hundred thousand eris, then at the group of teammates who were like mud that couldn't stick to a wall, and let out a deep sigh.(...One hundred thousand eris for a night of Ice and Fire Sandwiches, plus watching a good show of the Intellectual Disabled Goddess being disciplined... Thinking about it carefully, it doesn't seem like too much of a loss?)When Haru, looking pained, pulled out a thick stack of eris from his robe and slammed it onto the counter, the landlady's face instantly blossomed into a professional smile as warm as a spring breeze."Oh my, I knew you all were people destined for great things. You're welcome to come back and demolish—I mean, visit our shop again!"Haru ignored the landlady, whose face changed faster than flipping a book. He dragged his heavy body, which felt as if its magic had been drained, and looked back at Kazuma and Dust, who were currently in'Sage Mode'."Hey, Kazuma, Dust, stop acting like high monks." Haru, with his heavy panda eyes, lowered his voice and revealed a scum-like smile that only men would understand. "The debt is paid. Let's go relax at the city's open-air hot springs, shall we? I've heard the management of the mixed baths there is very lax. With just a few small tricks, we could be with everyone..."He originally thought these two lecherous ghosts would instantly be revived to full health. Instead, Kazuma only slowly turned his head and gave Harua look of enlightened mercy, followed by a long sigh."Haru, form is emptiness, and emptiness is form." Kazuma pressed his hands together, his tone as flat as stagnant water. "I have decided. From this day forward, my heart belongs to this great Water City, not to any trouble-making machine with breasts.""That's right, Brother Haru." Dust also nodded with a profound expression. "I just want to sit on this bench with Brother Kazuma until the end of time. Mixed baths... will only affect our..."Haru was stunned.He looked at these two completely broken men, then at Aqua, who was obediently squatting on the ground counting ants, not even daring to breathe loudly.Ultimately, he decided that since these two useless guys had lost their dreams as men, he wouldn't bother trying to convince them.He turned around and looked at the female contingent already assembled at the inn's entrance."Since those two aren't going, let's head out." With a wave of his hand, Haru led the group of beauties toward the city's most famous hot spring, operated by the Axis Order.When the group arrived at the hot spring entrance and saw the oversized sign that read [Mixed Bathing (All Axis Cultists are family, no need for modesty!)], the atmosphere instantly became subtle."...M-Mixed bathing?" Yunyun's face instantly turned red all the way to her neck, and steam even began to rise from her head. "T-This isn't appropriate, is it? Although I came here to make friends, isn't this 'honest' friendship a bit too big of a leap?!""Hmph, Yunyun, this is where your training as a member of the Crimson Demon Clan is lacking." Megumin's face was also a bit red, but she puffed out her reassuringly flat chest and tried to act like an adult. "In the homeland of us Crimson Demon Clan, this level of contact is nothing!""Ooh... Mixed bathing!" Darkness had already entered some deep delusional state. She hugged her shoulders, her body twisting involuntarily. "Under the watchful eyes of the public... being stared at by Haru's eyes full of scum-like light... maybe even having some unspeakable collisions in the mist... This is the hot spring humiliation I've dreamed of!""Um... Mr. Lin Jin, if you don't mind, I don't have a problem with it."Wiz smiled gently. Her Lich constitution meant she wasn't very repulsed by such things; instead, she looked forward to being close to Haru's warm life force again."Let's go, Aqua. You go wash that brain of yours that's full of mush too." Haru grabbed Aqua by the back of her collar and walked directly into the steaming mixed bath area.Amidst the swirling steam, Haru was the first to strip off his shirt and jump into the pool. The warm spring water instantly enveloped his tired body, causing him to let out a groan of relief.Following that, accompanied by light footsteps and the sound of fabric sliding off, one graceful figure after another appeared indistinctly in the mist and entered the pool.To the left was Wiz's flawless, jade-like, and curvaceous figure that commanded presence even in the water; to the right was Darkness's body, full of athletic beauty and flushed pink from extreme shame; directly opposite were Megumin and Yunyun, who had started splashing water at each other to see whose skin was whiter.As for Aqua... as soon as she entered the water, she activated her automatic purification mode. She floated on the surface like a salted fish, muttering: "I am a goddess, I am the Goddess of Water, Aqua. Everyone, come and worship me..."Leaning against the edge of the pool, Haru's left hand brushed against Wiz's cool, smooth skin, while his right hand accidentally bumped into Darkness's scalding thigh.(...Although one hundred thousand eris was expensive, and although Kazuma and Dust are broken, looking at the scene before me...)Haru wiped the warm water from his face and revealed an extremely satisfied, scum-like smile.(...This wave, a guaranteed profit!)
Chapter 135: Crisis!The originally dreamlike scene of soft, fragrant skin instantly transformed into the set of a horror movie.Haru had his eyes closed, savoring the cool, jade-like touch of Wiz on his left side, when he gradually felt the sensation in his palm becoming thinner and thinner, even beginning to emit a bone-chilling cold.He snapped his eyes open, nearly jumping out of the pool in fright.Wiz, who had been sitting beside him, had now turned into a semi-transparent, pale blue jelly-like state. Her normally gentle, large eyes were rolled back, her tongue was slightly poking out, and she looked miserable as if she were about to ascend to the heavens at any moment.Even more terrifying, her curvaceous body was constantly emitting fine white bubbles in the water, like a Slime being doused in strong acid."Hey! Wiz! Wake up! Are you trying to reincarnate on the spot and report to eris in the heavens?!"Haru cried out in alarm, grabbing Wiz's shoulders—which he could barely get a grip on—and trying to lift her out of the water."...Ugh... It hurts... Mr. Lin Jin... The water is seeping into my body... I feel like my Lich Core is about to be purified into pure water... Waaah..." Wiz's voice was weak, sounding like static from a radio.Haru whipped his head toward the other end of the pool.Aqua, that Intellectual Disabled Goddess, was spinning around happily on the surface of the water like a joyful little duck, humming an unknown hymn of the Axis Order.As she swam, the originally murky sulfur hot spring water was rapidly transforming, with her as the center, into a crystal-clear liquid that even emitted a faint, holy golden glow—the highest grade of Holy Water."Aqua—! What are you doing, you idiot! Stop it! Wizis going to be washed away by you!" Haru roared in anger."Eh? Haru, what are you talking about?" Aquastopped her movements, wiping the water droplets from her face with an innocent expression. "I just thought the water quality of this hot spring wasn't clean enough. As the Goddess of Water, I naturally have to provide everyone with the top-tier bathing experience! Look, the spring water is so clear now! You can even drink it directly!""Drink your head! That's Wiz's life!"Haru didn't care about propriety anymore. He lunged forward and, amidst the gasps of the crowd, scooped up the nearly transparent Wiz by the waist and dragged her from the pool onto the stone slabs on the shore."!! Lin, Haru! You actually... carried the almost naked Wiz out of the water in front of everyone!" Darknesscovered her face, but the gaps between her fingers were wider than anyone's. Her entire face was flushed with excitement from this sudden sense of outdoor exposure. "This feeling of crudely seizing a woman's body in the middle of chaos... Haah... P-Please do the same to me!""Idiot, now is not the time for that!" Megumin's face was as red as a ripe tomato, but she still realized the gravity of the situation. "Yunyun! Quick, bring a towel! Wiz's body is really disappearing!""Waaah! Okay! Towel, where's the towel?!" Yunyun spun around in a panic, but her foot slipped, and she fell directly into Haru's arms. The scene descended into utter chaos.Haru didn't have time to deal with Yunyun in his arms. He looked at Wiz on the stone slab, who was so weak she could barely maintain her human form. Gritting his teeth, he once again activated the essence supply like he had the previous night."Wiz, hang in there! If you die now, the hundred thousand eris I paid will truly be for nothing!"Haru pressed his palm firmly against Wiz's cold chest (the sensation was delicate, but he couldn't care about that now), and the mana and life force within his body poured out frantically."...Ah... Haah... Mr. Lin Jin..." Nourished by the life force, Wiz let out a long moan. Her originally transparent body began to solidify rapidly, and an alluring blush returned to her cheeks.Since they were on the shore, the heat generated by this supply process caused a ring of white mist to rise around them, making the scene look extremely ambiguous and scandalous.Just then, a series of hurried footsteps suddenly came from the entrance of the hot spring area."It's here! I heard what sounded like the singing of the Goddess!""Look! That pool water... that water is glowing! It's a miracle! It's a miracle from Lady Aqua!"A group of Axis Cultists, wearing only loincloths and possessing fanatical eyes, rushed into the mixed-bath area like a tide, holding up various nonsensical banners.The first thing they saw was Haru holding Wiz, with his hand still pressed against her chest."...That man... that man is actually desecrating the sacred hot spring!""Yeah, why isn't that person me?!!!""Heretic! He's definitely a spy sent by the Eris Order! Everyone, get him!"Haru looked at the oncoming crowd of muscular, oddly-wired cultists, then at the not-yet-fully recovered Wiz in his arms, who was grabbing his neck with a dazed expression.The mist in the hot spring area, instead of providing cover, seemed to cast a highly suggestive glow over Haru and Wiz."Stop! You rude followers! Look closely, I am the Lady Aqua you worship! I won't allow you to hurt my companions... No, I won't allow you to ignore me!"Aqua stood in the center of the glowing Holy Waterpool, spreading her arms in a pose of sacred inviolability, attempting to use her divine authority to intimidate the rampaging followers.However, in the face of this Axis Order group whose heads were clouded by alcohol, heat, and the resentment of being single, so-called divine authority seemed pale and powerless against the primal human emotion of jealousy."Shut up! Blue-haired girl, get out of the way! Can't you see that man is desecrating that super beauty?!""Damn it... that woman... she's clearly so beautiful! So cute! And... and that size is just cheating! Why isn't the hand pressed against her chest mine!""The heretic must die! Not only must he die, but he must give up his hand's position to me before he does!"The fanatical cultists let out beast-like roars, completely ignoring their Goddess. One cultist even pushed Aqua back into the water during his charge because he found her to be in the way."Splash!...Waaah! You actually pushed me! I'm a Goddess! I'm really a Goddess!"Aqua splashed around in the Holy Water, letting out a miserable cry of betrayal by her followers.Haru watched the army of buff men with bulging muscles and bloodshot eyes charging at him in nothing but loincloths, feeling his scalp go numb.Wiz in his arms had regained her physical form, but she was as limp as mud, her hands tightly encircling his neck while she let out small, misunderstood gasps."...Mr. Lin Jin... I'm sorry... I can't stand up..."Wiz buried her face in the crook of Haru's neck with a deep blush. The incredible sensation nearly made Haru lose his composure on the spot."Stop apologizing! If we don't run now, we're really going to be purified by these lunatics!"Haru gave a loud shout, using all his strength to scoop Wiz up in a bridal carry and sprinted toward the changing rooms."Stop! Don't even think about running! Put that beauty down!""You scum! You must have used some despicable hypnosis on her! Release that girl and let me break the curse!"A group of muscular men sprinted across the slippery stone slabs at top speed; the scene was extremely 'philosophical'."—!! Is this... is this the legendary siege by a jealous mob?" Darkness had somehow blocked the path of the pursuers. She wasn't wearing clothes, only barely covered by a pitifully short towel, yet her face was filled with an extremely broken ecstasy. "Come! Angry cultists! Vent your jealousy of my companion on me... This development of being misunderstood, trampled, and used as an object for venting... Haah... Please, perform the most cruel 'interrogation' on me!"However, the cultists just bypassed her, with someone even yelling: "Move! You muscle woman! We want the soft one... No, the beauty! Everyone in the way, get lost!""...Eh? I was ignored?" Darkness felt like she'd been struck by lightning, turning into stone on the spot. "To not even have the qualification to be ravaged... This humiliation of being completely rejected... Ooooh! It's wonderful!""Yunyun! Quick, use magic to stop them!" Meguminshouted while holding up her slipping bath towel."But... but they're all ordinary people! Crimson Demon Clan magic will blast them into ash!" Yunyun was so anxious her tears were about to fall. "Um... everyone please calm down! We're all friends... Wah! Don't grab my foot!"In the chaos, Haru carried Wiz into a curved corridor.Because the floor was slippery, he had to use his high agility to jump back and forth along the walls.(Damn it! How is the combat power of these Axis Cultists higher than Orcs?! Can jealousy really provide a boost to all attributes?!)As Haru ran, he felt Wiz in his arms seem to wake up slightly from the violent jolting. Her semi-transparent fingertips lightly brushed the back of Haru's neck, sending waves of tingling through him."...Mr. Lin Jin... although it's dangerous... being carried by you like this... it feels so happy...""Happy my foot! If you don't help out, I'm going to throw you to those loincloth perverts!""Found you! Nowhere to run now!""Hehehe... hand over that big-chested beauty, and we might consider only beating you into a paraplegic!"
Watching the group of fanatics behind him, Harupicked up his pace, subconsciously finding himself at the hotel, where he happened to run into Kazumaand Dust, who were coming out to seek psychological rehabilitation.These two were still maintaining their conjoined twin mode, back-to-back.Just as he was about to collide with the two conjoined twins, Haru suddenly leaped up from the ground, his body like a black lightning bolt, vaulting over the two heads that were pressed tightly together."Excuse me, excuse me!" Haru didn't forget to shout while in the air. Incidentally, because Wiz's body was so slippery, his hand subconsciously shifted upward, eliciting a low moan from the lich in his arms.Kazuma and Dust were still a bit dazed, their eyes alarmingly identical: both were dead fish eyes.Just a second after Haru jumped over, a ground-shaking sound of footsteps, accompanied by a thick, pungent smell of sweat filled with the resentment of bachelors, rushed toward them.It was a group of Axis Cultists with bloodshot eyes, drooling mouths, wearing only loincloths, and muscles twitching."...Dust, D-Dust." Kazuma's hands began to tremble violently, his dead fish eyes reflecting the figures of these fanatical cultists. "Look at the look in their eyes... that hunger, as if they want to swallow people whole, skin and bone... that madness of wanting to ravage their target at all costs...""...Ah, I see it, Brother Kazuma." A drop of cold sweat slid down Dust's forehead. "It's exactly... exactly the same as the Orcs that day! No, these cultists are even more unreasonable than Orcs!"Deep in their memories, the trauma of being besieged by that group of strong female Orcs and being chased across three whole mountains as breeding material instantly resurfaced.That fear of being dominated, that shivering sensation of having one's dignity as a man completely crushed, reached its peak at this moment.However, in the face of extreme fear, these two men, who had already completely broken down, actually underwent a miraculous evolution known as giving up and letting go.Kazuma turned around abruptly. Because he was tied to Dust, the two nearly fell over together, but his eyes revealed an unprecedented determination."Dust! We can no longer run away! If we can't even beat this group of loincloth-wearing perverts, we will never be able to escape the shadow of the Orcsfor the rest of our lives!""That's right! The best way to overcome fear is to face it head-on!" Dust also let out a tragic, heroic roar. "Come on! Axis Cultists! You bunch of lunatics who have nothing but jealousy! Feel the wrath of the conjoined warriors!""Ooooooh—!"The two grown men, like a pair of waddling penguins or an out-of-control double-headed tank, launched a suicidal charge toward the group of fanatics in an incredibly ridiculous yet imposing manner."—Huh? Where did these two perverts pop out from?!""They're actually charging at us while tied together... How disgusting! Is this some kind of new heretical attack method?!""Don't block the way! We're going to snatch that busty beauty! Kick these two pieces of tied-together trash aside!"Bang—! Boom—!Two forces, filled with resentment and fear, collided fiercely in the center of the hallway.Kazuma waved his little fists while not forgetting to use [ Steal ], attempting to snatch the loincloth of the lead cultist to create chaos; meanwhile, Dustslammed his head hard into the opponent's stomach.Haru, holding Wiz, hid in a corner in the distance. Watching the hallway that had descended into a chaotic melee, he couldn't help but wipe away some cold sweat.(...Although I'm touched, watching two grown men tied together in a melee with a bunch of loincloth-wearing hunks... this scene is just too sanity-draining.)"...Mr. Lin Jin... will Kazuma and the others be okay?" Wiz asked in a small voice, huddled in Haru's arms."Don't worry, those two guys have more vitality than cockroaches. While we have the chance, let's hurry to the changing room to put on our clothes and then get out of this hellhole!"A philosophical melee worthy of being recorded in the history of Axel (or perhaps, Alcanretia) was reaching its climax.Haru, holding Wiz, hid around the corner, watching the bizarre and heroic scene ahead with wide-eyed astonishment.Kazuma and Dust, who were originally tied together just to escape the shadow of the Orcs, now, under the baptism of the fire of jealousy, had developed a breathtaking rapport."Dust! Three cultists on the left are trying to sneak attack our backs!" Kazuma issued a shrill command."Leave it to me! Brother Kazuma! As long as we are back-to-back, our defense is flawless!"Dust let out a roar, suddenly leaning backward. Using their combined weight, he led Kazuma in executing an extremely awkward yet powerful two-person whirlwind kick.Bang! Bang! Bang!The three cultists who tried to rush forward were swept away by this conjoined whirlwind, hitting the wall with a dull thud.Kazuma, taking advantage of the spin, swiped his right hand precisely through the void, activating skills several times in succession."[ Steal ]! [ Steal ]! [ Steal ]!"As streams of white light flashed, screams erupted one after another in the hallway.The leading cultists only felt a chill in their lower bodies; their only remaining garment—the loincloth—was now neatly hanging from Kazuma's fingertips."Waaah! My loincloth! That was a limited edition holy-patterned loincloth from the Axis Order!""This bastard... he stole our souls! Everyone, cover your private parts!"The once-aggressive army of cultists instantly fell into disarray.In the eyes of these fanatics, the shame of losing their loincloths even outweighed the physical pain.And Kazuma and Dust, these two losers who were originally dominated by fear, now had a light in their eyes called awakening."Do you see, Dust... these guys are trembling." A smile of extreme scum appeared on Kazuma's face. He wiped the sweat from his face, and the soul belonging to the scum Kazuma truly returned. "So, as long as we are more perverted and more unreasonable than them, so-called fear is not worth mentioning at all!""Ah... I feel it, Kazuma." Dust panted, their bodies pressed tightly together from the intense exercise, sweat mingling. "That mountain called Orcs has collapsed. Now, even if I face ten thousand female Orcs, I can hold my head high... although I will still run, my heart is no longer trembling!"The two looked at each other; although they were back-to-back and couldn't see each other's faces, this bromance that transcended dimensions and gender spread wantonly through the hallway.They launched another charge, grappling with the cultists in a near-masochistic manner.The sound of fists hitting flesh, the sound of loincloths being torn, and Aqua's confused cheering from the sidelines wove together into an absurd symphony.After a long time, the battle finally subsided.A group of Axis Cultists lay scattered in the hallway, clutching their lower bodies and questioning their lives.Kazuma and Dust had finally exhausted their last bit of strength. The two lay on the ground, bruised and battered. The thick hemp rope had loosened during the melee, but they still maintained that tightly pressed posture."...Heh, hehe..." Kazuma stared at the ceiling, a trace of relieved blood on the corner of his mouth, laughing like an idiot. "We won... Dust, we won.""Yeah... this feeling... is really good." Dust also revealed the same blank, foolish smile.At this moment, the shadow of the Orcs that had shrouded their hearts for several days completely vanished in this melee filled with philosophical vibes.They not only regained their fighting spirit as an Adventurer, but also gained a profound friendship that was too painful to look at.Haru, holding Wiz, walked out from the shadows. Watching these two guys lying on the ground looking at each other affectionately, he couldn't help but shiver."Hey, you two... if you don't get up and put on your clothes, I'm really going to call the police and report a large-scale illegal gathering here.""...Mr. Lin Jin, Kazuma and the others... seem to be very happy." Wiz huddled in Haru's arms, her eyes filled with a trace of confusion. "Is this what humans call the bond between men?""No, Wiz, that's just two perverts warming each other up." Haru sighed, stepping directly over the two men who were exuding a strange aura. "Let's go. While those cultists haven't reacted yet, let's hurry to the changing room. If I keep holding you like this, my sanity will hit zero too."Haru quickened his pace, quickly flashing toward the direction of the women's changing room.After all, Wiz was currently in an alluring state of being almost completely naked and semi-transparent. If he stayed in the hallway any longer, he feared he might not be able to resist joining that philosophical melee himself.
Chapter 137: A Terrifying ExistenceIn a corner of the changing room, Wiz was resting on a bench, wrapped in a thick bath towel, her face flushed.With Haru's continuous supply of life essence, the Lich lady was finally pulled back from the brink of being purified by the Holy Water. At this moment, she was secretly stealing glances at Haru, who was wiping his sweat, with eyes full of gratitude and shyness.On the other side, Kazuma and Dust, who had just finished their philosophical brawl, were standing stark naked in the middle of the changing room.That thick hemp rope, symbolizing fear and bonds, had snapped into several pieces. Although both were covered in bruises, their eyes were clearer than ever before.It was a clarity belonging to a scum."...Whew, I feel like my whole being has been sublimated, Dust." Kazuma said as he pulled up his pants, revealing an extremely distorted, villainous smile. "Orcs, PTSD—they're nothing in the face of absolute desire. Right now, I only have one thought in my head...""Me too, Brother Kazuma." Dust wiped away a nosebleed, looking toward the entrance of the mixed-gender bath area with an extremely lecherous gaze. "Over there are Aqua, Megumin, Yunyun, and that Darkness, whose body is so good it's explosive... Having just been besieged by those smelly men, I'm in desperate need of some feminine energy to balance my soul."Haru turned his head and happened to catch the gaze Kazuma was throwing his way.In that instant, the air seemed to freeze.Haru and Kazuma's gazes met in the air; it was a resonance of wavelengths that transcended language and life or death, something only top-tier pieces of trash could produce.Kazuma's eyes were saying: "Hey, Haru, do you get it?"Haru's eyes replied: "Ah, of course I do. If three people share benefits of this level, the probability of being discovered increases significantly."Kazuma: "And this guy Dust is too noisy; he'll definitely ruin everything."Haru: "Exactly. Real infiltrators only need elites, not some punk who only knows how to charge headlong."Both of them simultaneously broke into an identical, scum-like smile that could make a crying child stop in terror.The atmosphere inside the changing room became unusually eerie.Kazuma and Haru, those two 'fighter jets' among trash, were trying to use various lame excuses to send Dust away. But as a famous delinquent Adventurer in Axel, Dust's sharp scum-like intuition kept him as steady as a mountain."Save it, you two." Dust crossed his arms, looking with disdain at the two who were making up pathetic excuses about buying towels and checking the drainpipes. "Don't think I don't know what you're thinking. Trying to ditch me at a time like this to hog the spoils? No way! I, Dust, am a man who would sell his soul for justice (benefits)!"Haru and Kazuma looked at each other again, sparks practically flying in the air.Since the soft approach didn't work, they could only use that Intelligence-lowering strike.Kazuma suddenly wiped the smile off his face, replacing it with an extremely solemn, even slightly jealous and lonely expression.He walked to the window, looked out at the shimmering streets of Alcanretia, and let out a deep sigh."...Forget it, Haru. At this point, we can't hide it from a Casanova of Dust's level anymore."Haru immediately understood. He put on a look of frustration, as if he were unwilling but had to admit defeat, and said in a low voice: "Yeah. Although we wanted to keep that intel to ourselves, as expected... only a truly handsome guy is worthy of that legend."Dust's ears perked up instantly, his gaze becoming sharp: "...Legend? What legend? Speak up, what big news are you two bastards plotting behind my back?"Kazuma turned around, staring intently at Dust's blond hair with eyes that said he was the chosen one:"Dust, have you heard of the Golden Holy Spring in the deepest part of this Water City? It's said that a noblewoman, so beautiful she doesn't seem human, lives there in seclusion. Not only does she possess wealth that rivals nations, but... she has a well-known quirk.""A quirk?" Dust swallowed hard."She has a special soft spot for men who are blond, handsome, and exude wild charm." Haru added at just the right moment, his voice filled with thick jealousy. "Kazuma and I actually found out the location long ago. We wanted to try our luck, but looking in the mirror just now... Sigh, with commoner faces like ours and black hair, going there would just be humiliating ourselves.""That's right." Kazuma patted Dust's sturdy shoulder with a sincere look. "But you're different, Dust. Look at this dazzling short blond hair, look at this face full of stories! If you go now, that lonely noblewoman will surely go crazy for you. This is a chance to change your destiny! Whether to soak in a mixed bath crowded with an Intellectual Disabled Goddess and violent maniacs, or to conquer an elegant and wealthy noblewoman... the choice is yours."Dust was completely stunned.He subconsciously touched his chin, his gaze gradually shifting from suspicion to fanaticism, and finally to absolute confidence."...I knew it! I knew a golden man like me would shine sooner or later!" Dust suddenly clenched his fist, radiating a mysterious aura of self-confidence. "A mixed bath... I can see that any day! But the favor of a noblewoman... that's the ultimate romance! Thanks, brothers! If I really become a son-in-law to a wealthy family, I definitely won't forget you two black-haired background characters!"Having said that, Dust didn't even have time to dress properly; he just threw on a coat and rushed out of the changing room like a whirlwind, muttering: "Blond... handsome... wild... yes, that's me, Lord Dust!"As they watched Dust's silhouette disappear at the end of the hallway, the changing room fell into a deathly silence.Three seconds later, Haru and Kazumasimultaneously burst into extremely malicious laughter. They laughed so hard they couldn't stand up straight, even slapping each other's backs."Pfft-hahahaha! He actually believed it! He really believed it!" Kazuma laughed until tears came out. "What Golden Holy Spring? That's clearly the public basin the Axis Order uses specifically to wash smelly socks!""And that so-called noblewoman—if I remember correctly, she's that auntie who washes clothes by the basin every day and has a temper fiery enough to tear an Orc apart by hand, right?" Haru gasped for air between laughs. "I hope Dust's wild charm can withstand that auntie's washboard attack."After they had laughed their fill, their eyes became sharp and scum-like again."Alright, competitor eliminated. Next..." Kazumapulled a long, thin bamboo tube from his robes, his gaze locked onto the curtain of the mixed bath area."...it's our home turf."Wiz, watching these two men laughing like demons from the bench, couldn't help but shrink her neck and whisper: "...I can't help but feel that when Mr. Lin Jin and Kazuma are together, they become a very terrifying existence..."Stopped🔊 Browser
Chapter 138: Sacrifice the Teammate, Not Me"Um... Mr. Lin Jin, I also want to go confirm the water quality... After all, I am a Lich, and I am quite sensitive to that kind of dangerous power..."Wiz tried to stand up by bracing herself against the bench, but her knees went weak, and she fell back down, letting out a delicate cry of surprise."Be good, Wiz." Haru turned around and pressed down on her shoulders with an extremely gentle tone (though his eyes were full of scum desires), "In your current physical condition, if you get any closer to that Holy Water pool released by the Intellectual Disabled Goddess, you really will turn into distilled water. Go back to the room and wait for me obediently; once I finish dealing with the chaos inside, I'll bring you something delicious.""...O-okay, Mr. Lin Jin is truly so considerate."Wiz's pretty face flushed red, and she lowered her head obediently. Under Haru's gaze (which was actually to confirm she had truly left), she walked out of the changing room, looking back every few steps, and shuffled toward the direction of their inn room.Watching Wiz disappear from sight, the gentleness on Haru's face instantly collapsed, replaced by a scum smile that made the air turn cold."Hehehe... The obstacles are all gone." Kazumapulled two dry towels from who knows where, handed one to Haru, and wrapped the other around his own head. His eyes flashed with the gleam of a predator, "Haru, although you haven't learned [Lurk] yet, don't worry, the mist here is the best cover. Follow my footsteps, breathe lightly, move quickly, and definitely don't make those perverted panting sounds.""You're the one who looks most like a pervert, Kazuma."Haru lowered his voice to retort, but his body had already very honestly crouched down. Like two giant crocodiles lurking in a swamp, the pair silently pushed open the door leading to the mixed-bathing area.Whoosh—!A blast of scalding and humid steam rushed toward them.Because of Aqua's earlier antics, the spring water here was not only ridiculously clear but also emitted a faint golden light. Combined with the thick steam, it looked just like a legendary heavenly bath."...Whoa, whoa, whoa, look over there!" Kazumanudged Haru with his elbow and pointed toward a misty corner.In the blurry water mist, a few graceful figures were faintly visible."—Eek! Megumin! Don't splash water on my face! My hair is all wet!" Yunyun's voice, filled with grievance and breathless gasps, drifted from the depths of the mist."Hmph, this is the Explosion Magic splash of the Crimson Demon Clan's number one genius! Yunyun, as my opponent, is that all you've got? Take this!" Megumin's crisp and pleasant voice followed, accompanied by a series of intense splashing sounds."You two brats are too noisy!" Aqua's signature voice, laced with a hint of drunkenness, rang out from the center of the pool, "Watch closely! This is true art! Look, I can conjure little ducks out of the spring water!"Further away, there seemed to be a figure leaning motionless against a rock, emitting an extremely suppressed and heavy breathing sound."...Ha... Haa... This suffocating sensation of being tightly wrapped by steam... This sense of immorality, knowing I could be seen by a passing man at any moment... This humiliation of waiting for an unknown fate in the sacred spring water... Haa... It feels so good..." Without a doubt, that was Darkness lost in her own delusions.Haru and Kazuma exchanged a look, and both swallowed their saliva in unison."Haru, see that big rock in the middle of the pool?" Kazuma pointed to a piece of artificial rockwork near Aqua, "That's an excellent observation spot. You can watch the Crimson Demon Clan duel between Megumin and Yunyun, and also appreciate the Intellectual Disabled Goddess's juggling up close. Let's sneak over slowly; make sure not to step on the soap Aqua dropped."The two held their breath and crawled on all fours (to lower their presence), slowly creeping across the slippery stone floor.Haru felt his heart pounding wildly. This thrill of walking on the edge of a knife (peeping right under the nose of a goddess) made the adrenaline in his body surge frantically.Just as the two were about to approach the rock, Aqua suddenly stopped her juggling and sniffed curiously."Eh? Strange, why do I smell... an extremely strong stench belonging to a hikikomori piece of trash and a scum man?"Haru and Kazuma's movements froze instantly.(…When did this Intellectual Disabled Goddess's sense of smell become as sharp as a dog's?!)Underneath the nearly transparent spring water, two figures were lying silently at the bottom of the pool like submarines.Due to Aqua's damned Holy Water purification, the originally murky hot spring now had astonishing visibility. Haru could even clearly see Kazuma's face, which had turned beet red from holding his breath and was practically written with the word scum.Their gazes met underwater, and an intense atmosphere of betrayal instantly filled the air (or rather, the water).(Haru, although we were just comrades-in-arms sharing life and death, the situation is urgent now...)Kazuma's eyes flashed with an extremely dangerous gleam, and his hand was already quietly reaching toward Haru's ankle.(Likewise, Kazuma. In order not to let this great infiltration plan go completely bankrupt, someone has to step up to draw fire and bear the blame.)Haru didn't show any weakness either; his knee was already pressed against Kazuma's stomach, ready to use it as leverage to kick him out of the water at any moment.The two silently reached a consensus underwater: Sacrifice the teammate, not me!Just then, Aqua's sandal-clad feet walked up to the edge of the rock, less than half a meter from their hiding spot."Strange... The smell is getting stronger. It's like a human weapon made by mixing a NEET who hasn't bathed in two months with a pervert who thinks about stealing panties every day." Aqua bent down, her pretty face gradually approaching the water surface, her azure eyes filled with suspicion, "Hey, Megumin! Darkness! Do you guys feel like bubbles are coming up from behind this rock?""Bubbles? Could it be a spring outlet?" Meguminstopped splashing water and leaned over curiously."...Haa... Bubbles... Could it be some kind of tentacle monster lurking at the bottom of the water, preparing to drag me into the abyss in full view of everyone? It's, it's too wonderful! Hurry and let it come out!"Darkness was already hugging her own body with a flushed face, her eyes filled with fanaticism.Underneath the water, Haru and Kazuma launched their attacks simultaneously!Kazuma yanked hard on Haru's ankle, attempting to use him as bait to throw toward Aqua's toes; meanwhile, relying on his slightly superior strength, Haru pressed his hands firmly onto Kazuma's shoulders and launched himself backward as if stepping on a pedal, while also giving Kazuma's butt a fierce kick for good measure."Glub-glub-glub—!" A string of violent bubbles erupted from the bottom of the water.Because Kazuma had been ambushed by Haru, the breath he was holding leaked out halfway instantly. Like a dehydrated salted fish, he popped out of the water surface behind the rock."—Puhah! Cough, cough, cough! Haru, you bastard...!"Kazuma shouted while coughing, but before he could finish saying Haru's name, he realized he was already in the center of a circle surrounded by four females (three girls and one goddess).The air instantly fell into a deathly silence.Aqua's eyes widened, and pointing at Kazuma, she let out a scream that could pierce eardrums: "Waaah! It really is you, you hikikomori NEET! I knew that stench couldn't be wrong! You actually snuck into the women's bath! And with that perverted man... Eh? Where is that perverted man?!"Kazuma turned his head stiffly and discovered that only a faint ripple remained where Haru had been hiding. That despicable and shameless guy had actually used the momentum from that kick to slide silently toward a drain further away, aided by the steam and the shadows of the rock."...Um, if I said I was just practicing underwater lurking, would you believe me?"Kazuma wore a smile that was uglier than crying, his hands instinctively covering his vital parts."—The prelude to [Explosion] has already begun, Kazuma." Megumin raised her staff with an expressionless face. Although she couldn't cast Explosion Magic in the hot spring, the killing intent had already condensed into substance, "Yunyun, help me catch him, don't let him run!""O-okay! Although this isn't very nice, Mr. Kazumareally does deserve to be punished!"Yunyun flushed red and hurriedly began chanting the Bind magic.Hiding in the shadows at the other end of the pool, Haru watched Kazuma being besieged (physically beaten) by the girls and couldn't help but silently make the sign of the cross in his heart.(Kazuma, your sacrifice is valuable. At least you let me see clearly... Darkness's expression right now, it's really hopeless.)"Help! Haru! You treacherous piece of trash! Come back and save me!"Inside the hot spring inn, Kazuma's miserable and tragic cries for help echoed.