„If you had the chance to change your current situation in the blink of an eye, how would you change it?"-Hillary Wolf
Vivien read the quote from one of her favorite writers and wondered what she would wish to do right now. Her dearest writer was Hillary Wolf, but she also read, aside the school curriculum, poetry from Peter Zahn.
The two contemporary writers have similar views of the world and stories which are in her liking. Thus, while still reminiscing on that quote, she placed her book on the nightstand and got prepared for another day at highschool.
She stepped on the bus, the atmosphere dark and unpleasant.
Grey clouds were taking over the sky in an attempt to shake the world to wake up and solve all of the occuring problems on its own, a realization far away from reach.
She kept a small notebook in the pocket of her coat in which she wrote about her day, a small journal she didn't want anyone to see, thinking it's a little embarrassing to share. When around strangers, she took the journal out her pocket knowing they won't care, but she never wanted anyone familiar to notice her secret hobby in fear of getting shamed for the things she wrote.
She usually never kept personal information from her closed ones, but when her thoughts of getting shamed and abandoned came, nothing else mattered to her except keeping the secret as hidden as she could from the prying eyes of her friends and family.
She didn't notice Sylas stepping in the bus and taking a seat in the back, watching her write in her small notebook.
Curiosity flickered in his eyes, now realising they are taking the same bus together to school, just on different stations.
He silently watched her as she wrote, but decided not to approach for now. If only she found out one person discovered her secret, she would've kept her artistic thoughts hidden away for good, never bringing them with her anywhere else ever again.
Sylas' eyes followed Vivien's movements as she stepped out the bus and he followed her. She walked past the students who were chatting, their voices filling the air as the halls were buzzing with students preparing for their first lesson.
Vivien was unaware of who was behind her and what he had in mind. He weaved through the crowd in an attempt to not lose her from his sight.
The girl opened her locker which required the code 4561 to unlock, and she grabbed her books for her next class period. As soon as she closed the locker, she noticed him leaning against the locker next to hers, his backpack dangling from one shoulder.
He spoke in a louder voice in order to scare her.
„Morning, bookworm!", he said, the so well-known smirk already plastered on his face.
„Oh my God! Sylas.", Vivien jumped, getting scared of his sudden appearance next to her.
Of course, Sylas laughed at her reaction. He pushed off the locker and came closer to her, arms crossed over his chest in a guarded stance.
„Jumpy today, are we? Oooh man, that was so embarrassing to see, not to mention... What were you writing in that notebook of yours? The secrets to the universe or your to-do list?"
„How did you know I was writing?"
„We take the same bus."
„Since when do we take the same bus? Can you be more sinister than you already are?"
„I'm merely an observant individual. Now stop avoiding my question and spill it, what were you writing about?"
„Why do you need to know? It is personal business, and my personal business is none of your business. Got it?"
„You can't be writing with such vigor and expect me not to get curious. It's like taunting me."
„It was not meant for you to see, so I'm not taunting you."
„Perhaps, writing a love letter to someone?"
„A LOVE letter? To who, my dog?"
„Alright, sorry, I didn't mean to bother you. Just save a seat on the bus next time I feel like not being annoying."
With that, Sylas turned around and left, but it made Vivien feel very guilty.
She didn't know what the reason for her sudden burst of feeling was and the strange warmth in her chest was suddenly too much. She was happy someone was so attentive to her, but at the same time, she didn't want him finding out about her journaling hobby. Just before he would get lost in the crowd, she told him to wait, and the echoing of his footsteps suddenly stopped as he stood still and turned around once again, but this time to look at her.
„Let's walk to class together, but please make sure you don't talk too much since I love to be left wandering in my own thoughts. To answer you question, I'm not writing about love and I don't have a certain someone I like because I'm so cool."
„Wow, can't grant that wish to be left alone in your thoughts just yet, I suppose. I finally get the privilege of walking with her majesty herself in flesh and bone and I'm not allowed to speak? How gracious."
„I don't know if that's an agreement or not, but let's go."
„You're the co-star of pride and you might graduate with a coolness degree, oh-so-cool person.", he added as they kept walking.
His long legs matched her pace, looking ahead and stuffing his hands in his pockets. Vivien was glad he stayed true to his word and didn't say anything else as he let the silence stretch, the soft glow of peacefulness descending in between them.
Tallis was a big town in which many cars usually drove by the school, escpecially in the morning.
She would hear the cars driving by when the windows down the halls were open, but this time, there was an absence of the sound she was attuned to and the peace in her soul was taken away just as fast as it had settled in for that sole reason.
They arrived to class and Sylas nodded a greeting to her friends as he leaned against a bench and began talking to his own companions.
The two had their separate and chaotic lives to look forward to, and the girl had a lot of others aspects on her mind. Vivien managed to avoid any unnecessary stares from the others and walked forward.
„Hi, girls!", Vivien greeted them.
„Hey, Viv. One question, what's he doing walking with you to class?, Rachel asked.
„Nothing. Ignore him.", she told them as Sylas smiled and waved at Grace and Rachel.
„Ignoring someone like him seems like a challenge to me, almost impossible."
„The word impossible shouldn't exist, but it's an understatement, there's no point in talking about it. Anyways, I was looking outside yesterday, did you girls see the blood moon?"
„Oooh, yes, but unfortunately, mom keeps me caged in like a sick puppy because of midterms. I'm sure it was nice."
Grace also joined the conversation once she heard about the astronomical event. She spoke in a quieter voice, more timid than the other two girls.
„I watched it with my little brother last night. It was beautiful."
„I can't believe I missed it. Ughhhh, you two have amazing lives and I'm stuck rotting in my bed and learning, I hate it so much! Vivien, did you watch the event by yourself? Please tell me you wrote poetry under the blood moon, that would be a core memory. Aaah, I can't believe my dear Viv is growing up so fast, looking at blood moons alone. I might cry thinking about it!"
„Poetry under the blood moon? What, should I have gotten secret superpowers? You sound ridiculous, Rachel. It's nothing new, the Sun, Moon and the Earth align with Earth's atmosphere filtering sunlight, which gives the Moon a red hue. That's it."
„I know, you became an alien. My Viv is never throwing such hurtful remarks towards my face. If you're plotting something alien-like, I'll eat my sandwich to watch whatever you'll do. Go ahead and abduct us all with your UFO. Make us escape from this life-like dream of taking exams, ooh I can't wait to be abducted!"
Rachel sat down at her desk and pretended to eat from the sandwich she brought in a small lunchbox. Both Grace and Vivien watched her, Grace chuckling and looking more amused than ever while Vivien felt like crawling into a whole and staying inside forever.
„Sharing is caring. Give us a bite!", Grace added.
Rachel gasped in shock and moved her sandwich away from Grace. She shook her head as if to make her understand the sandwich was hers, but she wasn't even eating it, only pretending to.
Vivien's hands started to tingle once again. The girl took a quick look at them and noticed nothing out of the ordinary. She scratched her palms and walked to her desk, sitting down in a peaceful manner.
She grabbed her notebook and waited for the teacher to come while her friends continued chatting, Rachel occasionally offering a bit of the sandwich she brought to Grace.
Vivien started doodling in her notebook, a simple habit she's had ever since she was little that she couldn't put an end to.
She didn't know what she wanted to draw, but she was happy scribbling and not thinking about anything.
A few minutes later, the english teacher, Ms. Jones, came inside the classrom. The students became less noisy and everybody turned to the teacher.
The lesson began, Vivien trying to pay attention to what was written on the whiteboard, but she couldn't help having an odd feeling about something.
Time seemed to keep crawling by as a paper boat following a whirling river. The water kept dragging on, Vivien simply wanted the day to be over with already. Just then, the teacher asked a question to the class, and the girl listened.
„Can anyone tell me what Shakespeare was trying to convey with the theme of fate in „Romeo and Juliet"?"
The room fell silent, a few students pretending to look around or write something important in their notebooks.
Some tried to give their best answers like tragic love, and Vivien wrote down anything she might have thought was important. She looked through her notes, that's when Sylas rose his hand and answered.
„Free will versus destiny. They both had choices, every single option leading back to tragedy. They were like puppets forced to walk on strings, but still the ones blamed for the fall."
Ms. Jones nodded at the answer, but just then, Vivien also raised her hand, finding something to say.
„I think the writer wanted to convey a deeper meaning. Destiny is what brought them together, but it was also what destroyed them entirely. It was a complete oxymoron, coming from my perspective."
Ms. Jones approved of Vivien's answer as well, saying it was also correct and that Romeo and Juliet's love was both destiny and destruction.
Vivien noticed a few more students agreeing with what the girl talked about. Not many had the energy to point out anything more because it was morning. The class discussion continued, moving from the theme of fate to more broader questions.
Once the bell rang and the teacher stepped out the classrom, Vivien didn't waste any time.
She turned around in her seat to face Sylas. She hoped lightning strikes and tornadoes could be discerned in her eyes.
„Are you trying to one-up me for fun? Since when are you interested in Romeo and Juliet? You never answer during class."
He lightly tossed a pen in his hand. The usual smirk was present on his face, but this time there was no arrogance behind it, just mischievousness.
„Who says I was trying to one-up you? It just miraculously happened that I knew that part. I'm not interested in that cheesy shakespearean work, I'm more interested in why you're so troubled about all this."
Vivien huffed and turned back, minding her own business. That's when she felt a kick. The wooden chair jerked forward and Vivien whirled around. Her eyes narrowed in anger.
„What, me? Didn't touch it."
His shoulders were shaking with quiet laughters as he grabbed something from his bag, then stepped out the class. Grace and Rachel were both watching the show, perplexed.
Vivien tried to clear her mind after the irritating encounter. Their highschool is named Elton, one of the best for studying literature.
Half of her classmates wanted to pursue literature further, including her and Sylas. Considering it was their last fall at Elton, everyone would eventually split apart and never see eachother again.
That was her trying to console herself because she was not looking forward to seeing that boy again. Still, some parts of her knew he wasn't just talking about Romeo and Juliet. He was talking about real life choices, as if he had experienced something similar before.
The halls hummed with quiet urgency, lockers being closed and endless chatters. Footsteps were echoing like a countdown.
At Elton High's gates, a slowly rusting memory began to form. Every word started to feel like it might matter more than it usually did.
Vivien sat there quietly in her chair, as if she couldn't move. The laughter from the halls faded away, even Grace and Rachel's endless chatter felt distant. Why did he answer so seriously? That was unlike him. Not the guy who fake-sneezed numerous times during quiet reading time or who called philosophy class brain explosions. Somehow, Romeo and Juliet wasn't just some dusty story, it meant something.
Vivien's fingers tightened around a pencil she was fiddling with. Grace stepped forward and waved a hand to the girl, trying to catch her attention. She spoke in her usual quiet tone.
„Vivien, are you okay? You're doing that intense stare thing again."
Grace's eyes tried to follow Vivien's, wondering what she was thinking about, but the girl was only staring into space.
„I bet you five bucks our friend will write about Sylas in her personal journal after this encounter!"
Her world shattered into pieces once she heard Rachel talk about her journal. Only Sylas found out about her secret hobby, and he divulged it. When did he even have the time to talk to her friends? Why couldn't he just keep a secret?
That's right, she forgot to tell him not to mention it to anyone else, though she did say it was personal. Vivien smiled and kept up her facade, but in her mind, she was trying to find every single way to confront Sylas about this.
„You girls have no more nonsense to spout? Wait, I'm going to be late for my library appointment. I let the librarian know I'll be coming today, but I completely forgot with everything going on."
Vivien got up from her seat and immediately ran downstairs towards the school library. She went past students which had no idea she was in a rush, just as her having no clue where they were headed towards.
The highschool's library took the role of an oasis of calmness in all the chaos, with its old books and quiet corners.
The girl couldn't wait to step inside once more. She hurried towards the school library and finally arrived. Once she opened the door, she asked the librarian for the title and the author of the book she was looking for, telling the woman she had an appointment for that day.
The librarian nodded, then looked through the endless literary works. Another boy was waiting in line behind her. The woman handed her the book, then Vivien slipped past the boy who was waiting in line.
She tucked the book „The Waves" by Hillary Wolf to her chest. It was a copy with a worn spine and and pages that smelled like quiet afternoons.
As she turned towards the reading nook in the back, Vivien froze, because sitting there, slouched in her favorite chair with his feet propped up on the table, was Sylas. He just couldn't leave her alone, could he?
The girl held the book closer, and that made his eyes flicker towards the novel she was holding, then back to her, with that same exhibition of nonchalance he always seemed to portray. Should she have confronted him about the fact that he divulged her secret earlier, or should she have forgiven him? Vivien chose the easier way out.
„The seat is available, if you want it.", he said.
The grey clowds were taking over the sky, and rain started to hit the windows, a soft and rhythmic sound that made the library feel even more secluded. Sylas gestured to the empty seat next to him, but the girl ignored him and walked out the library. From then on, she vowed not speak to him ever again.
The library door clicked shut behind her, but the silence didn't follow. The weight of that moment almost dragged her down into a dark abyss, but she walked past as if nothing happened. Vivien clutched the book to her chest thinking it could shield her from whatever this day brought on for her.
At Elton, where futures are written in essays and scansions, dreams being scribbled during class periods or during breaks, sometimes the hardest choice isn't to confront someone. It's about admitting someone sees you, not just as the simple cover of a book, but as a whole story. Maybe, he'd been reading the few pages she'd been holding all along.