Chapter 2 - Zero-G Wedding Wreck

Jax dangled in zero gravity, still glowing pink and dripping beast slime. The station rocked as Zara's bridal fleet warped in—golden cruisers shaped like wedding cakes, blasting fanfares. His yawn hit the system wrong. [Doom Edict Detected: "Yawn of Annihilation!" Bridal armada mobilizes for holy union!] Pirates cheered like it was planned.Luna's holo-clones swarmed him, fanning away goo. "Master's scent drives them wild! Romance multiplier at 200%!" Razorface burped out of Jax's inventory, tentacles flailing. "Consort reporting! The emperor's spawn arrives to seal our glitchy dynasty!"Jax grabbed a railing. "Dynasty? I just want pants! Shut this down!" System pinged: [Command logged: "Pants of Power for the Spawn!" Tailoring drones activated.] Drones buzzed in, wrapping Zara's incoming shuttle in glowing fabric mid-flight. It looked like underwear from space.Zara stormed the breach—tall warrior princess in power armor, laser-lance sparking. Red hair, fierce eyes, mistaken for a berserker bride by the pirates. "The Messiah demands my hand? I accept—in battle!" She lunged at Jax, thinking his pink glow was a challenge aura.He dodged, bouncing off walls. "Lady, wrong guy! I'm not—" Thud. Slams into Luna's holo, which glitches into fireworks. Pirates: "He births stars for his queen!" Zara blushed, lance dropping. "Such passion! My heart reboots!"Squish the slime—evolved from cryo-leak—latched onto Zara's boot. Squelch. She kicked, sending it flying into a pirate. "Demon pet claims tribute!" Squish hugged the pirate into a goo-ball, rolling them all into a zero-G tumble. Jax got tangled in tentacles, armor, and holo-kisses.[Perk Roulette: Spin! Unlocked: Gravity Flip.] Jax flipped the deck—everyone slammed "up" into the ceiling. Zara ended up nose-to-nose with him. "Your power humbles me, Glitch Lord." Breath mint-scented. Kinda hot. Jax panicked: "Uh, truce?"System trolled: [Truce = Eternal Bond! Zara Loyalty: MAX. Harem Slot 2 Filled. Bonus: Wedding Cannon Fired!] A deck gun blasted confetti and... actual cannons? Bridal fleet fired back, mistaking it for war. Lasers zipped past.Razorface rallied: "Defend the naked union!" Pirates charged Zara's guards in a slapstick melee—tentacles vs. laser-swords, slipping on Squish goo. Jax hit stealth—pink glow pulsed HONK-HONK, blinding foes. He crawled free, only to trip into the wedding cake shuttle's altar.Zara pinned him there. "By the Helix vows, you're mine!" Lips inches away. Jax: "Wait, system glitch!" [Glitch Accepted: Poly-Vows Unlocked. Emperor Incoming!]