"Elders, is there something specific you came here for?"
Ebizo felt slightly uncomfortable under Shiro's piercing gaze, but he maintained his composure.
"Yes, Lord Kazekage. These are the high-priority documents from the last few days that require your immediate attention and decision."
As he spoke, he handed a small stack of files to Shiro.
Shiro's expression turned serious as he received the documents, but a realization quickly dawned on him.
"Elder Ebizo... these are the 'important' documents in your hand. What about the mountain of paper currently burying my desk?"
"Those are all relatively unimportant."
Shiro: (╯'-')╯︵┻━┻
*Heh.*
"Then why are these 'unimportant' documents sitting on my desk?"
Shiro looked at Ebizo, his voice laced with a dangerous sort of gentleness.
"Because... well, the protocols state that even minor documents require the Kazekage's seal."
"..."
*Lord Madara was right after all. This damned ninja world and its bureaucratic nightmare should just be destroyed.*
He forcibly took a deep breath to calm his rising urge to destroy the office.
Shiro opened the first high-priority document.
Ebizo, standing nearby like a diligent secretary, began summarizing the content.
"This document is an official inquiry from the Daimyo's estate. Seven days ago, a caravan transporting luxury goods from the Land of Wind to the Land of Fire was intercepted and robbed by unidentified shinobi within our borders. The Daimyo has sent a letter inquiring about the cause, as the maintenance of security within the Land of Wind is Sunagakure's contractual responsibility."
"Furthermore, the letter repeatedly insinuates that Sunagakure was responsible for the theft. The Daimyo also demands a 'reasonable explanation' for our sudden ceasefire with the Rain, stating that if we do not provide a suitable reason, he will once again reduce our annual funding."
*Smack!*
Shiro slammed the document down hard onto the desk, cracking the wood slightly.
"An explanation? He actually dares to ask *me* for an explanation! Then tell him that Sunagakure is bankrupt and unable to maintain stability within the country due to his stinging budget cuts."
"Also, inform him that if he reduces Sunagakure's funding again, our defense perimeter will shrink even further—and it won't just be the border regions affected this time. Perhaps the capital might find itself lacking guards. Of course, Lord Daimyo is welcome to rely on a few useless samurai to stabilize the situation if he prefers."
"Lord Kazekage... that is the Daimyo we are talking about. Wouldn't writing something so threatening be..."
"Then be more tactful with the phrasing. As long as the threat is clearly understood, I don't care how you write it."
Shiro settled back into his chair, rubbing his temples. Although he had lived in the ninja world for over a decade and was aware of the one-country, one-village system, experiencing the absurdity of it firsthand was infuriating.
He had never understood why those who wielded the actual power—the shinobi—had to bow to some common Daimyo. What was the point? Was it out of genuine loyalty, or just habit?
If his current strength wasn't still developing, the Daimyo would be the first person he eliminated. After all, the wealth accumulated by the nobility over the past few centuries was no small sum.
Having received Shiro's aggressive instructions for the reply, Ebizo mentally noted to soften the language significantly before moving to the next item.
"The other matter is a report from Sunasuke. He says the factory in the Land of Rain has been completed and requires your instructions for the operational phase."
"Alright, I'm aware of that. I will reply to him personally shortly."
"What is the next matter?"
"The next item is a diplomatic letter from Konoha. The Third Hokage sent correspondence offering condolences for the war and expressing hope that the Land of Wind can dispatch troops to contain the Iwa shinobi on the western front, thereby achieving peace in the ninja world sooner."
*Smack!*
The sound of a hand hitting the desk rang out again, but this time, it was followed by Shiro's excited voice.
"This is excellent! Sending troops is excellent! We must send troops immediately!"
Hearing Shiro's words, Chiyo was the first to react, speaking up in alarm.
"Lord Kazekage, we just concluded a war. Starting a new conflict with Iwagakure right now... wouldn't that destroy us?"
"Start a war? Who said anything about starting a war?"
Before Chiyo could finish her thought, Shiro interrupted her with a perplexed look.
"But... didn't you just say we must send troops?" Chiyo couldn't help but ask, confused by Shiro's contradictory statements.
"Does sending troops necessarily mean fighting a war?"
Shiro turned to Ebizo with a cheerful, fox-like grin.
"Reply to the Third Hokage later. Make sure to emphasize the 'unbreakable bond' between Sunagakure and Konoha. Then, highlight Sunagakure's current financial distress in vivid detail. Finally, state that we are willing to deploy troops to the border... but only if we receive a mobilization fee first. Once the money arrives, we'll deploy troops, and then we just need to make a loud show of force between the Land of Wind and the Land of Earth without actually engaging. Got it?"
Ebizo and Chiyo: =͟͟͞͞=͟͟͞͞(●⁰ꈊ⁰●|||)
*We... we can play the game like that?*
"Lord Kazekage, that's truly... pragmatic. But what if the Land of Earth takes our deployment seriously and attacks?"
"Then we'll write to Onoki first. We tell him we won't attack as long as *he* pays us a 'non-aggression fee'. We'll fleece both sides."
Chiyo and Ebizo: ⋛(▀Ĺ̯▀-͠)~⋚
"Won't we end up being ganged up on by both villages?"
"What do they stand to gain by attacking us right now? We're destitute. You're barefoot; are you truly afraid of those wearing expensive shoes getting them dirty?"
Shiro tilted his head, looking at the two elders with a feigned innocence.
*(Internal monologue: Of course they would attack us eventually—Sarutobi Hiruzen might hesitate, but that stinky old man Onoki definitely would—but not right now. Everyone is exhausted.)*
"Ahem, Lord Kazekage, while Sunagakure's situation is indeed dire, you are the Kage... a bit of dignity..."
"I understand, I understand. Dignity is important, but gold buys dignity."
Chiyo and Ebizo, seeing the unwavering resolve in Shiro's eyes, found themselves unable to press the issue further. They could only hope Shiro truly knew what he was doing.
After seeing the two elders off, Shiro stretched languidly. He then stood up from the Kazekage's desk, ready to call it a day.
"Send all these 'unimportant' documents to Elder Ebizo's desk. Have him approve them."
"Yes, Lord Kazekage."
The Anbu concealed in the shadows materialized, gathered the mountain of paperwork, and vanished to execute the order.
Shiro was extremely pleased as he walked home. Sure enough, being the Kazekage had its advantages.
At the very least, he could delegate his own suffering to someone else.
*Feeling smug.*
***
Meanwhile, at Ebizo's office.
Ebizo had just returned and was busy organizing his fishing gear in a cupboard.
He planned to head to the pond on the back mountain shortly to catch some fresh fish for his little grandnephew, Sasori.
*What? You say I'm skipping work?*
*Who said that? Show yourself! What's wrong with an Elder taking a break? This old man has served Sunagakure for decades, shed blood for it, and earned the right to enjoy his golden years!*
Just as he opened the door, preparing to sneak out, an Anbu shinobi suddenly appeared, carrying stacks upon stacks of documents that blocked his view.
"Lord Ebizo, these are from Lord Kazekage. He instructed me to deliver them to you and requests that you review and stamp them all as soon as possible."
Ebizo: '...'
"That little beast!"
Coincidentally, a certain Kazekage was thinking along similar lines.
*I had to work like a dog before becoming Kazekage, and I still have to work like a dog after becoming Kazekage. Doesn't that mean I became Kazekage for nothing?*
*Skip work?*
*Who dares accuse the Kazekage of skipping work! I am merely... inspecting the village.*
Arriving home, Shiro saw Fusae and the three children. All four of them were sitting on the sofa in the living room, anxiously waiting for his return.
"Big Brother Shiro!"
Seeing Shiro standing in the doorway, Konan couldn't hold back. She rushed forward and hugged his leg tightly.
Scooping Konan up into his arms, Shiro entered the house. After greeting everyone individually, he took them upstairs to select their rooms.
Since Shiro was not short on personal funds (thanks to his Magnet Release gold mining), his private residence was quite large and fully equipped with all necessary amenities.
Once the four rooms were arranged, it officially marked Fusae and the three orphans joining Sunagakure.
As for why there were four separate rooms for the guests? Don't ask.
If you must know, it's because he was afraid of "disturbing the children" at night.