Yoichi was born in the family of a star professional player. Yoichi loved playing soccer with his father. He loved his father with all his heart and would play soccer in order to show him that he was a good son. But when his father stopped being known as a talented player his career plummeted…and…he killed himself while taking care of Yoichi. Yoichi saw his father kill himself with his own eyes. And sat at his father's body for a whole week till his mom came to pick him up. Yoichi just sat there malnourished, in the same exact spot he was when his father killed himself. After his mother took him to the hospital he began to think about his father constantly, about how his father deserved death by being worthless even when he tried his best.
He failed…So Yoichi began to be super scared of failure so that he wouldn't be worthless like his father. He then got into United Middle School and would only pass to Sakura but when Sakura left he became the Ace and hated it. He hated the people staring at him as he would constantly grow nauseous and throw up in the locker room. Finding an excuse to quit soccer, begging for a career ending injury or a failed grade. But for some reason he avoided getting injured and never failed on purpose. He just stayed in a state of null trying not to stand out so that he could feel comfortable about his failure.
I watched my father play soccer on my TV and wiggled with anticipation. That is my father, I'm his son, he's my everything. Father walked into the room and I immediately ran to him and launched myself at him.
"PAPA! I wanna play soccer!"
We played, played for hours stacked on hours. I eventually started playing soccer in middle school, but every time I scored he was nowhere to be seen. What's the point in being the center of attention if my dad wasn't there watching me.
One day when walking home I saw a new article of my father being benched for being too mediocre. I grabbed it and balled it up.
"If he's mediocre. I'm nothing!"
I slowly watched my father's mental health deteriorate as I tried my best by working harder on soccer. I couldn't do anything but watch. Maybe if I just tried things could've ended differently, but they didn't.
One day Father told me he loved me and…shot himself in the head right in front of me. I stared at my dad's dead body for a whole week. Starving and everything, but that didn't hurt as much as the hole in my heart.
My mother eventually visited to pick me up and found my starved half to death, sitting next to Father's dead body. Mother took me to the hospital but I couldn't stop thinking about Father. Why did he do that? Why didn't he live for me? Was I that bad of a son?
"No, he did it because he was a failure."
Sakura sat next to me when I said it in the hospital.
"Damn man, that's kinda harsh don't you think?"
I had breakdowns for months, crying constantly in the shadows.
"I don't wanna be a failure! I'm not worthless I swear!"
I went to Jaidnail Highschool to avoid attention due to Sakura being the known ace of the team. But when Sakura left for 2 years, I became the Ace alongside Valeri. I grew nauseous and threw up in the locker room constantly.
"Don't look at me."
I began to try to find an excuse to quit soccer, begging for a career ending injury or a failing grade. But for some reason I avoided getting injured and never failed on purpose. I just stayed in a state of null, trying not to stand out so that I could feel comfortable about my failure. I don't deserve to call myself a soccer player.