Location: Fortress of Meropide (Processing Area)
Current Form: Human
Status: Incarcerated (Voluntarily), hungry for prison loaf
Getting into the Fortress of Meropide usually required committing a crime. Aether and Paimon had to go through a complex legal setup involving a false charge of eating Paimon's cake (not really, but close enough).
Raiden, however, took a more direct approach.
He walked up to the Gardemeks at the elevator entrance.
"Halt," the machine buzzed. "Authorized personnel only."
Raiden ripped the heavy steel door off its hinges, folded it into a paper airplane, and threw it into the ocean.
"I'm turning myself in," Raiden declared. "Charge: Destruction of public property and excessive awesomeness."
The guards were too terrified to argue. They slapped the cuffs on him.
Raiden looked at the cuffs.
"Analysis. Material: Standard Iron. Durability: Laughable."
"I'll wear them as bracelets," Raiden shrugged. "Lead the way."
Raiden was escorted not to a cell, but directly to the Administrator's Office.
Sitting behind a large metal desk, sipping tea, was a man with scars, icy blue eyes, and mechanical gauntlets.
Wriothesley. The Duke.
"So," Wriothesley set his teacup down. "You're the famous Anomaly. Raiden Ragnvaldr. You tore my elevator door off. Do you know how much that costs to replace?"
"Put it on Neuvillette's tab," Raiden sat down in the guest chair, snapping the handcuffs like they were made of paper. "I heard the food down here is free. I wanted to sample the local cuisine."
Wriothesley raised an eyebrow. "You came to prison... for the food?"
"I'm a connoisseur of questionable meals," Raiden leaned back. "Also, the Traveler is down here investigating something. I'm his chaperone. He tends to get into trouble involving ancient gods."
Wriothesley chuckled, a low, dry sound. "You're honest. I like that. But down here, everyone works. No work, no Credit Coupons. No Coupons, no food."
"I can work," Raiden cracked his knuckles. "I see you have a Pankration Ring. I can punch things."
Wriothesley's eyes lit up slightly. "A fighter? Interesting. I might take you up on that. But first..."
He slid a cup of tea across the desk.
"Welcome to Meropide. Try the tea. It's my own blend."
Raiden took a sip.
"Analysis. Black tea. Bergamot. Trace amounts of motor oil? No, just metallic water piping residue."
"It's strong," Raiden nodded. "Has a kick of rust. Not bad."
A small Melusine with pink hair and a nurse's cap trotted into the room.
Sigewinne.
"Your Grace! Is this the new inmate?" Sigewinne beamed. "My, his vitals are strange! His heart rate is... four beats per minute?"
"I'm conserving energy," Raiden told the small creature.
"Oh! Do you want a milkshake?" Sigewinne offered a glass filled with a bright purple liquid. "It's nutritious! Liver, spinach, and... a few secret ingredients!"
Aether and Paimon (who had just arrived via the standard processing route) looked horrified.
"Don't drink it!" Paimon warned. "It looks like poison!"
Raiden took the glass.
"Great Sage. Analysis."
"Object: Sigewinne's Special Shake. Contents: High protein, questionable texture. Toxicity: Moderate for humans, negligible for Host. Taste Profile: Unspeakable."
Raiden downed the whole glass in one gulp.
"Refreshing," Raiden slammed the glass down. "Tastes like bubblegum and iron."
Sigewinne clapped. "He likes it! Finally, someone with taste!"
Wriothesley looked at Raiden with newfound respect (and mild horror). "You have a stomach of steel, my friend."
Life in Meropide was a grind. Process widgets. Earn coupons. Eat the "Welfare Meal" (which was literally just a block of meat and gravy).
Raiden finished his shift in five minutes.
"I processed 500 widgets," Raiden told the stunned supervisor. "I used [Parallel Processing] and super-speed. Give me my coupons."
He took his tray of Welfare Meals (ten of them) to the cafeteria.
Aether sat opposite him. "We found out something. Childe is missing."
"The Wallet?" Raiden chewed on a piece of tough meat. "I haven't sensed him since we got here. But his trace is... deeper."
"Deeper?"
"Below the prison," Raiden pointed at the floor. "There's something nasty down there. Primordial Water. And something else. Something big."
"Big like Osial?" Paimon asked.
"Bigger," Raiden's eyes narrowed. "Interstellar big. It smells like a whale."
A few days passed. Strange things were happening. The pipes were groaning. The temperature was fluctuating.
Wriothesley was often absent.
One night, Raiden felt a tremor. Not an earthquake. A pressure change.
"The sluice gate," Raiden muttered, waking up.
He walked out of his cell. The guards tried to stop him.
"Go back to sleep, inmate!"
"Out of my way," Raiden walked past them. [Dragon's Fear: Low Output]. The guards fainted.
He headed straight for the Restricted Zone, deep below the production floor.
He found Wriothesley there. The Duke was shirtless, sweating, turning a massive valve with his cryo-infused gauntlets. A massive metal gate was bulging inward. Purple water sprayed from the cracks.
Primordial Seawater.
"Need a hand?" Raiden asked, leaning against a pipe.
Wriothesley gritted his teeth. "You... shouldn't be here. This is... classified."
"The gate is failing," Raiden observed. "The pressure on the other side is immense. If that bursts, the Fortress floods. Everyone dissolves. Then it hits the surface. Fontaine goes bye-bye."
"I know!" Wriothesley growled, ice spreading over the valve to freeze the leaks. "That's why I'm... holding it!"
"Move over, Duke," Raiden stepped forward.
"It's too heavy!"
Raiden placed one hand on the massive blast door.
[Intrinsic Skill: Herculean Strength].
He pushed.
CREAK.
The bulging metal door was forced back into place. The leaks stopped.
Wriothesley stared, panting. "You... pushed back the ocean?"
"I pushed back the water," Raiden corrected. "But the problem isn't the door. It's what's agitating the water."
Raiden pressed his ear to the cold metal.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
A heartbeat. Massive. Ancient.
"There's a whale on the other side," Raiden whispered. "The All-Devouring Narwhal. Childe's pet monster from the Abyss."
"A whale?" Wriothesley wiped sweat from his brow. "In the Primordial Sea?"
"It's drinking the sea," Raiden explained. "It's getting fat. And Childe... Childe is fighting it."
The Soup Kitchen
Suddenly, a pipe burst to the right. A high-pressure jet of Primordial Water shot out, aimed directly at a group of panicked workers who had followed them down.
"Look out!" Wriothesley shouted, preparing to jump.
Raiden moved faster.
He stepped into the stream.
The water that could dissolve humans hit Raiden's chest.
HISS.
Steam rose. But Raiden didn't dissolve. His skin glowed with [Hydro Sovereign Authority].
"Spicy shower," Raiden laughed.
He opened his mouth and intercepted the stream.
[Gluttony: Hydro Vacuum].
He drank the leak. Gallons of Primordial Seawater vanished into his stomach.
"System Report. Consumed: Primordial Seawater. Analysis: Origin of Teyvat Life. DNA extraction: None. Mana recovery: High."
Raiden burped. A bubble of pure Hydro floated out.
"A bit salty," Raiden wiped his mouth. "But it has a nice, rich texture."
Wriothesley leaned against the wall, looking exhausted and done with everything. "You just drank the stuff that melts people."
"I told you," Raiden grinned. "I have a stomach of steel."
With the crisis temporarily averted by Wriothesley's ice and Raiden's appetite, they regrouped in the office.
"We can't hold this forever," Wriothesley said. "The Whale is waking up. The Traveler needs to know."
"Aether is already investigating," Raiden said. "But we need to get out of here. I have a date with the Knave."
"Arlecchino is here?" Wriothesley frowned. "Diplomatic nightmare."
"Don't worry," Raiden patted Wriothesley's shoulder. "I'll handle the politics. You just keep freezing the pipes. And maybe add some sugar to that tea."
Raiden turned to leave.
"Raiden," Wriothesley called out.
"Yeah?"
"Thanks."
"Don't mention it," Raiden waved without looking back. "Just make sure my coupon balance is transferred to Mora when I leave."
Childe's POV (Briefly)
Location: Within the Primordial Sea (The Abyss Dimension)
Tartaglia (Childe) was floating in the endless dark ocean. His Foul Legacy armor was shattered. He was bleeding.
Before him swam the All-Devouring Narwhal, a beast the size of a continent.
"You're... huge," Childe wheezed, summoning a hydro blade. "But I'm not done yet!"
Suddenly, he felt a vibration. A familiar presence.
"A bit salty. But nice texture."
Childe blinked. "Raiden? Is he... drinking the ocean?"
The Narwhal turned its massive head away from Childe, sensing a predator above. A predator that viewed it not as a monster, but as sashimi.
Childe laughed maniacally. "Hah! Run, whale! The Glutton is here!"