It is too much. The rapid changes in her feelings, in her environment, it is too much. Her knees give way to soft, slippery mud, hands gripping her thin dress with suppressed emotions.
Lila
It comes as a weird sort of shock. Three weeks ago, her presence would not have bothered Camrin, but now she is categized as a threat. Slipping behind the dry, bare branches, still wondering how the same door led to different places, Camrin crouches down, listening to the quiet chaos.
"Your Royal Highness, I will not disappoint you!"
"Hmm." The princess's bored voice, then another one, laughing, mocking her for something. Confused, Camrin lifts her head to see what going on. Surrounded by poorly kempt plants, the princess and her loyal knight, Elizabeth, look entirely out of place. Even Lila, now dressed and decorated in their clothes, seems to look like them. But her lack of antennas and the black sparkling band around her neck ruin the image. Still, Lila tries desperately to elevate her standing in their eyes.
"My Princess, when does the training start. I have no opposition to helping others with my great power." Lila takes on an innocent, helpless expression. "I wish Camrin was also that thoughtful. Unfortunately, she's barely human, so no Sen chose her."
The princess eyes the girl in front of her, aware she's basically licking her shoes for attention. And instead of bashing Camrin, she laughs mockingly.
"It seems you have already taken on the role of the chosen ruler when you have not been picked yet. Yes-" she says, interrupting Lila's frantic words, " you have the scent of a Sen, but they have not claimed you yet. No big sign or miracle has been shown for your support. And regards to your friend, the Sens have not chosen her yet, but we have. Elizabeth here has been trained to pick the best of any species for our purposes, and I have the upmost trust in her abilities. The people of Eshika have chosen Camrin, have controlled Camrin, and we own Camrin. I request you not speak ill of my dog in my presence."
Even the sick leaves seem to go silent at the princess's lecture, each person there having a differing reaction. Camrin bristles at the insult and arrogant ownership. Elizabeth is shocked, mirroring Lila's reaction without the hatred and envy in her eyes. She is the one with the scent of a Sen. She is the one with great powers. She can help them. So why are they supporting Camrin? Defending her? Taking ownership of her?
But the princess does not explain herself nor keep the silence.
"Eliazbeth. His Majesty calls for our presence. Let us not keep him waiting."
Lila stammers, struggling to keep their attention, eyes darting around desperately. It takes a minute for before her eyes crash into Camrin's. Time freezes in place, letting the two girls clash. Lila's hair stuck flying beautifully in the wind like glittering jewels. The colorful birds chirp at the corner of Camrin's eyes. And the shadows watch.
Lila is the human girl no more. She has a reputation to uphold, power to discover, and a place in society to take. It happens almost in slow motion. Lila's eyes widen, fill with anger, then brighten. She turns her back with a predatory smile.
"Your Highness, this is the door they led Camrin from. She is her-" The princess snaps around, her anger palpable at being held back.
"Miss, that is enough! The doors in this palace are charmed to consistently switch every hour of every day. The ancient spell was cast centuries ago by my ancestors to stop invasions. The doors are not the same" The princess looks pointedly at Lila
"It is not the same garden we were brought from, yes, but Cam-"
"Adam was assigned to teach you Chora history and magic. Why am I now explaining it to you? Are you not capable enough to learn it solely based on your intellect?"
Lila flares up. "Not at all your Highness. I find your history quite enjoyable and respectable-"
"Then return to your room and perfect it. Being a chosen one comes with immense pressure. A single mistake can have catastrophic consequences. It already happened once; it cannot happen again. Now, do no hold us from His Majesty."
The obvious rejection echoes around the empty garden, Camrin still half hidden by the bushes, visible if one looked hard enough. The wind no longer ruffles Lila's hair, the birds no longer in the garden and Camrin wonders if she imagined them to begin with. The garden is empty, save for the two old friends.
The silence stretches on for so long, Camrin stands up, walking slowly toward Lila. Her first instinct is to laugh. Mock the slow progress she traded for a friend, but Lilith's advice floats into her ears. Don't cut a beneficial tie without a reason. Lila betrayed here but there's nothing else for her to do to Camrin.
Humans are interesting things. Give them enough time and they'll forgive themselves for their own mistakes, slowly repairing the relationship without question.
"These people are rough."
"Shut up! We're not close anymore." Camrin shrugs.
"I guess we never were. What's that black thing on your neck? A leash?"
"Nothing! God, leave me alone. Are you that jealous, you want my position as the chosen one."
"Lila..... is that worth it? All this? They aren't even acknowledging you. They don't care about any of us-"
"SHUT UP CAMRIN! I DONT CARE WHAT'LL HAPPEN TO YOU BUT FOR ONCE, I WILL BE SOMEONE IMPORTANT"
"Someone important? Lila, are you crazy! You lived a normal decent life before, what could possibly warrant this level of insecurity and betrayal?"
"You know nothing about my life Camrin. I will make myself so important that everyone will adore me. The king and queen will take me as their own daughter-"
"The King and Queen?" Camrin stands fixed to the ground. Lila's grave tone, her dreams to conquer the hearts of the royal family. She blinks, and it hits her with full force. Her friend is going insane. She stays there frozen, even after Lila finishes her rant, even after she leaves and the quiet garden feels abandoned. She stands there until the cold settles into her bones, bringing around a suspension that mother nature has changed her tune once more. Briefly, Camrin wonders why Mother Nature chooses the extremes. Either blistering hot or freezing cold. Couldn't it be cool weather for once.
Without her realizing it, Camrin stays waiting in the garden, sitting on the dirty ground, waiting for something, something she doesn't know. A feeling. But nothing happens. And Camrin faces the fact that she has nowhere to go. Back to the palace from that cursed door or around the garden back to the front. But where's the front? What's there? She can't just walk to the palace doors, what if she's caught? What will they do to her? Where's Lilith? How can she reach her? What about the guards?
The faint feeling of wind against her temples stops her in her tracks. Heart pounding, hands trembling, Camrin takes several deep breathes. The first thing she attempts is going around the garden. In a reckless decision, she walks and walks, trees getting more and more bare as she goes. The dark settles in with scary precision around, seeming to target her wherever she goes. Nothing. For miles on end, nothing meets the eye but empty land and barren trees.
A sudden idea forms in her mind. Slowly, she turns around. Nothing. She turns the other way and finally she sees it.
The Eshika Forest. She is back. Back where she started. Large trees looming overhead. An identical looking statue to the one that her brought her to the palace stands close to her left, instead this one is rusted and scratched. Is this the opposite side of the palace? The palace doors constantly change themselves, that's what the princess said. Does one lead to the royal garden and the other to the servants' garden? They seem to be the exact opposite of each other, like a rivalry frozen in time. But the chill drives away her thoughts and even her panic, until Camrin walks all the way back to the empty garden again. How is she still alive?
The moon is high in the sky, the wind cruel and angry, whipping her hair every which way. Desperate and driven by a desire to survival, Camrin even tries to open the door with the possibility of being imprisoned in that strange dark room again. Locked. She tries to find the walls of the palace, but she sees nothing. It's like her brain refuses to see it. Cannot see it. Shivering, she hears a shout from beside her.
"LILITH!"
Is that her? Is that her raw voice screaming? She can't feel her mouth anymore, can't even feel her lips to double check that whoever is screaming her creature's name is her. It even screams Igore's name at some point.
Nothing. She can't run back to the forest. She can't run back to the palace. She can't run back to anyone she trusts. No food. No water. No shelter. And yet somehow, she has survived this long. The hours walking back and forth seemed like nothing. Her body is weak but not dying. The weather is what really gets her. And it almost does completely get her.
But there's noise. Little at first. Then branches cracking, someone laughing, silk scraping. If her heart had any strength left, it'd be pounding like crazy. But she just sits there, a matching statue to the golden dwarf of the portal.
The branches obscure the person coming her way. They walk slowly. Slowly. So slowly that Camrin thinks she'd breathe her last breath before they reach her. She closes her eyes, opens them, and there she sees not Lilith, not Igore, not even some guards.
Instead, the female knight of the royal family of Eshika Palace, the ruling family of Heis Chora stares down at the half dead, mud soaked, lonely, shaking girl with her little thin dress, and the small dumb strength buried in her eyes.