NICK
I opened it far too quickly for a man who claimed to be completely detached from the situation.
The image attached to the text took a fraction of a second to load, and when it did, I found myself staring at the screen in total, profound bewilderment.
It was a plushie. An enormous, stuffed object shaped unmistakably like a dildo. It had a pair of furious, dark eyebrows embroidered onto the front, complete with a tiny, tightly stitched frowning mouth that looked incredibly angry at the world.
Underneath the picture, a single line of text appeared: saw this at a shop today.
Reminded me of you.
I stared at the image for a length of time that could not be justified by the simplicity of the message. My brain attempted to process the image:
This is a plushie. It is shaped like a phallus. It has a face that looks thoroughly grumpy.
This object reminded him of me. This is the exact mental image I evoke in his mind. A grumpy, phallic, stuffed toy.
