"Guess I am the Captain now," Usopp declared, pointing his thumb at his own chest.
The entire deck froze.
Zoro, Sanji, Nami, Franky, Chopper, and even the Giants stared at the sniper. The look they collectively gave him was a mixture of absolute, unadulterated skepticism and pure disgust. It was a look that screamed, 'As if.'
"Hey!" Usopp shrieked, dropping the cinematic voice instantly as his fragile ego cracked. "Why are you all looking at me like that?! It's simple math! The chain of command demands a successor! Who here has the second highest bounty, huh?! Who is worth four hundred and fifty million berries?!"
"Bounties don't make the captain, you cowardly pelican," Zoro grunted, crossing his arms over his chest. He glared at Usopp with his lone, intimidating eye. "In the absence of the idiot rubber band, the title of Captain falls to the first mate. It's the unwritten law of the sea. There can be only one, and I have three swords. Under the Shogunate of Zoro, we train until we bleed, and then we drink until we forget we bled! Mandatory nap times and an endless supply of booze!"
"A meathead who gets lost walking from the bathroom to the kitchen cannot lead a crew!" Sanji roared, his leg igniting with a small, threatening spark. He adjusted his tie, looking incredibly suave. "A ship requires romance, elegance, and fine dining! I propose the 'Sanji Syndicate'! Under my glorious rule, every beautiful woman gets premium, free dining, while the men sleep in the bilge and swab the deck! A true utopia of chivalry!"
"I WILL DICE YOU INTO A SOUP, CURLY-BROWS!" Zoro yelled, drawing Sandai Kitetsu an inch from its scabbard.
"Objection!" Nami slammed her Clima-Tact onto the deck, stepping forward with the ruthless energy of a Wall Street executive. "Neither of you muscle-brained idiots is fit to lead! Who manages the budget?! Who navigates the ship through literal storms and whirlpools?! I hold the purse strings! I am the treasurer of this vessel! First order of business under my takeover: an eighty percent tax on all alcohol and meat purchases!"
"MUTINY!" Zoro and Sanji screamed in unison, suddenly united against a common, terrifying, capitalist enemy.
"SUUUUPER HOLD ON A SECOND!" Franky threw his massive, metallic arms together above his head. "Why are we settling for a monarchy or a corporation?! I propose a SUUUUPER Democracy! I, the Prime Minister of Cola, will turn the Thousand Sunny into an independent, robotic republic! Free cola fountains in every room! Mandatory Speedo Tuesdays for optimal aerodynamics!"
"Yohohoho! If I may interject!"
Brook stepped into the center of the circle, politely tipping his top hat. "While these proposals are fascinating, I must point out that I actually possess genuine, prior experience as a Pirate Captain! The Rumbar Pirates ran quite smoothly under my skeletal tenure! As Captain Brook, I promise a daily quota of skull jokes, mandatory forty-five-degree wall-leaning contests, and a strict policy of asking to see panties!"
WHACK! Sanji and Nami instantly kicked the skeleton into the main mast.
"Gebabababa!" Dory's booming laugh shook the deck. The giant, currently human-sized, stepped forward with Brogy. "If we are electing leaders, Elbaf demands representation!"
"Indeed!" Brogy raised his axe. "We declare a Diarchy! Rule by two Kings! The laws will be simple: Trial by combat for all disputes! Whoever loses becomes the appetizer for the victory feast!"
"I wanna be the Captain!" Chopper jumped up and down, waving his hooves, trying to be heard over the shouting. "If I'm President Chopper, we get free cotton candy every day! And mandatory nap times with extra fluffy pillows!"
Sitting on a lounge chair nearby, Jewelry Bonney was watching the entire scene unfold with her jaw hanging open. She looked back and forth between the screaming swordsman, the fiery cook, the tyrannical navigator, the posing cyborg, the arguing giants, and the talking skeleton.
Bonney leaned over to Nico Robin, who was sitting gracefully at a patio table. Robin had a cup of hot tea in her hand and a highly amused, serene smile on her face as she watched the chaos.
"Hey... Robin," Bonney whispered, genuinely baffled. "Are they serious right now? Our captain literally just shot himself into outer space. He could be drowning! He could be landing in a volcano or the sea! Aren't they worried about him at all? Why are they staging a mutiny five seconds after he disappeared?!"
Robin took a delicate sip of her tea. Her blue eyes crinkled with mirth.
"Do not worry yourself, Bonney," Robin chuckled softly, her voice smooth and calming. "Luffy is practically made of indestructible rubber and sheer, dumb luck. Nothing will happen to him. As for the mutiny..."
Robin gestured to where Sanji and Zoro were currently pressing their foreheads together, growling insults.
"...It's just their way of passing the time," Robin smiled. "They are having fun. It's nothing serious."
Bonney stared at them. She watched Usopp climb onto a barrel, attempting to give a grand, theatrical speech inspired by a brave highlander he read about in a comic book, screaming, "They may take our captain, but they'll never take our freedom!" only for Nami to kick the barrel out from under him.
This crew is completely insane, Bonney thought to herself, taking a massive bite out of a slice of pizza. I've joined a ship of absolute lunatics.
The chaotic argument raged on for the better part of an hour. Accusations were thrown, bizarre political systems were proposed, and Zoro threatened to slice the ship in half no less than three times.
Eventually, the adrenaline of the mock-mutiny wore off. The crew slumped onto the grassy deck, panting and exhausted from yelling at each other.
Sanji, ever the dutiful cook despite his aspirations for a romantic dictatorship, emerged from the galley carrying a massive silver tray. He walked among the tired crew, handing out tall, frosty glasses of freshly squeezed tropical fruit juice to quench their thirst from all the shouting.
"Here you go, Nami-swan, Robin-chwan, Bonney-chan!" Sanji swooned, offering the ladies the finest crystal glasses. He then kicked a plastic cup of juice toward Zoro's head. "Drink up, moss-head."
Nami took a long, refreshing sip of her juice. She let out a contented sigh, the cool liquid soothing her parched throat. She set the glass down on the patio table and looked over at the main mast.
"Alright, playtime is over," Nami announced, slipping back into her role as the undisputed boss of the ship. "Merry."
Merry, popped her head out from the crow's nest, adjusting her aviator sunglasses. "Yes, Auntie Nami?"
"Track the Captain," Nami ordered. "Track the location of the Kimoyo Bead Luffy is wearing. Let's go pick up our idiot before he accidentally declares war on another species."
"Copy that. Engaging global tracking matrix," Merry chirped.
Her blue eyes flashed red for a few seconds. A holographic map of the Grand Line projected onto the air in front of her. A small, blinking red dot appeared on the map.
"Target located," Merry reported, sliding down the mast effortlessly. "Captain Luffy's trajectory carried him quite a distance. He has crash-landed on an island in the Calm Belt, just outside standard Grand Line currents."
"The Calm Belt?" Vivi frowned, her brow furrowing. "That's incredibly dangerous. The waters are infested with Sea Kings, and there's no wind to sail."
"Good thing we aren't a sailboat," Franky grinned, striking a pose. "The Thousand Sunny doesn't need wind!"
"Sunny!" Nami called out toward the helm.
"Yes, Navigator Nami!" Sunny's cheerful voice echoed from the steering console.
"Set a course for the Captain's coordinates," Nami commanded, pointing forward. "Engage the paddle wheels. Let's go get him."
"Aye aye! Spinning up the Arc Reactor! Paddle wheels engaging now!" Sunny cheered.
The Thousand Sunny hummed with deep, mechanical power. The massive, hidden paddle wheels deployed from the sides of the hull, churning the water with incredible force. The ship surged forward, cutting through the ocean and leaving a wide, foaming wake behind it.
"At current cruising speed," Merry analyzed the data, "we will arrive at the island in approximately twelve hours. ETA is tomorrow morning."
"Perfect," Zoro yawned, pulling his bandana over his eyes and lying back down on the grass. "Wake me up when we hit something."
---
While the crew enjoyed a relatively peaceful afternoon and evening on the upper deck, deep within the heavily reinforced, soundproof walls of the Sunny's training room, Ben was hard at work.
He stood in the center of the massive, gravity-controlled chamber. He wasn't wearing his usual tailored suits; he was stripped down to a simple black tank top and athletic trousers, sweat glistening on his arms.
He was currently cycling rapidly through his templates, pushing the limits of his magical and physical endurance.
"Command T: Enlarge," Ben whispered.
A massive, fifty-ton tungsten block he had fabricated shot upwards, expanding to the size of a small house. Before it could crash down and crush him, Ben's eyes flashed with the golden light of the Thomas Andre template.
"Ruler's Authority."
The invisible, telekinetic force caught the colossal block mid-air. The strain on Ben's mind was immense. He was trying to weave his newly refined Conqueror's Haki directly into his telekinesis, a technique he had barely scratched the surface of during his bout with Garp.
Black and red lightning sparked around the floating tungsten block. The metal groaned, crushing inward on itself under the sheer, absolute pressure of his spirit.
"More," Ben gritted his teeth, his muscles bulging. "Compress it."
He held the concentration for hours, refining the invisible armor of his Haki, blending it seamlessly with the ancient, conceptual magic of Medea. If they were heading into the New World soon, he needed to ensure his magical barriers could withstand the apocalyptic attacks of the Yonko.
By the time the ship's internal clock signaled morning, Ben dropped the block, letting it crash harmlessly to the floor. He wiped a towel across his face, breathing heavily but feeling a deep sense of satisfaction. His integration of Haki and magic was stabilizing.
"Papa!" Sunny's voice crackled through the intercom speaker on the wall. "We have reached the destination coordinates! Land ho! The island is dead ahead!"
Ben looked at the speaker. "Good work, Sunny. Drop the anchor just offshore. I'll be up in a few minutes."
Ben grabbed a towel, headed to his private quarters to take a quick, refreshing shower, and changed into a fresh outfit. He opted for a crisp, white linen button-down shirt left open at the collar, paired with dark slacks, his silver-white hair slicked back perfectly.
When Ben finally ascended the grand staircase and stepped out onto the main deck, the crew was already bustling with activity.
Nami, Robin, Vivi, and Bonney were wearing light, breathable tropical clothing suited for a jungle expedition. Usopp was strapping his transforming bow to his back, and Chopper had his medical bag ready. Brook was adjusting his collar, and Franky was flexing his metallic arms.
Ben walked over to the railing, looking out at the island they had just arrived at.
It was a lush, vibrant jungle island surrounded by high, treacherous rocky cliffs. The flora was wild and untamed, the air thick with humidity. But what caught Ben's eye was the distinct, incredibly specific architecture of a massive, tiered village built into the side of a tall mountain in the distance, surrounded by thick stone walls.
Ben pushed his glasses up his nose, recognizing the geography instantly.
"Well, well," Ben said, a highly amused smirk playing on his lips. "Isn't this the island of women? Amazon Lily."
The crew paused what they were doing.
Sanji, who was standing near the kitchen doors lighting a fresh cigarette, froze. He held the lighter an inch from his face, the small flame flickering in the morning breeze.
Ben looked at the cook, his eyebrow raised in confusion. Sanji wasn't moving. He wasn't swooning. He wasn't erupting into a tornado of pink hearts.
"Sanji?" Ben asked, tilting his head. "Aren't you going to go? This is your dream land. An island populated entirely by beautiful, fierce warrior women."
Sanji slowly closed his lighter with a sharp clack. He took a long, slow drag of his cigarette, exhaling a thick plume of gray smoke. He turned his head, fixing Ben with a cold, utterly deadpan stare.
"There's an old saying, Magician," Sanji said, his voice flat, completely devoid of emotion. "I believe it's from the North Blue. It says: ' Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.'"
Sanji adjusted his tie, narrowing his visible eye.
"You can cheat me once, Ben, and that will be my mistake. But if I get cheated twice, I would look like a colossal, Speedo-wearing fool. So no. I am not listening to your lies."
Sanji crossed his arms stubbornly. "Island of women. Right. Let me guess, they all have thick beards, wear tutus, and want to chase me through the forest? Not happening. I am staying on the ship."
Ben stared at the cook for a long moment. He looked at the lush, green jungle of Amazon Lily, an island genuinely bursting with gorgeous, strong women, and then back at the deeply traumatized, highly skeptical chef.
Ben just shrugged. "Suit yourself."
"Alright, Everyone, let's go!" Usopp cheered. "Let's find the Captain!"
The entire crew disembarked the Thousand Sunny. It was a massive, intimidating, entirely bizarre procession stepping onto the pristine white sand of the hidden island.
The jungle was dense, humming with the sounds of exotic birds and massive insects. The group hiked carefully through the underbrush, Nami keeping a close eye on the map she was quickly drafting based on Luffy's signal.
"Luffy's signal is coming from deeper inland," Nami said, pointing her pen. "Toward that mountain village."
As they stepped into a small, sunlit clearing, a sharp, whistling sound tore through the air.
THWACK. THWACK. THWACK.
Dozens of long, wooden arrows slammed into the dirt directly in front of the crew's feet, forming a perfect, impenetrable line in the soil. The arrows were embedded inches deep, vibrating with residual force.
"Halt!"
A fierce, commanding voice echoed from the canopy above.
From the branches of the towering trees, a squad of tall, athletic women dropped down into the clearing, surrounding the Straw Hats completely. They wore minimal, tribal-style clothing, revealing highly toned, muscular physiques. Every single one of them held a large, beautifully crafted bow. But the most alarming feature was the fact that their bows were actually massive, living snakes coiled rigidly to act as weapons.
"Intruders!" one of the women, a tall warrior with short blonde hair—Margaret—stepped forward, notching another arrow onto her snake-bow. "How did you navigate the Calm Belt?! Why have you entered the sacred grounds of Amazon Lily, and what is your purpose here?!"
The Straw Hats froze.
Back on the Thousand Sunny, Sanji, who had been watching through a pair of binoculars to ensure they didn't get ambushed by 'bearded men', saw the Kuja warriors drop from the trees.
Sanji dropped the binoculars. They shattered on the wooden deck.
His visible eye bulged out of his skull. His heart slammed against his ribs. It wasn't a lie. It was real. Real, beautiful, fierce women.
"MELLORIIIIINE!"
Sanji didn't just run. He became a literal whirlwind of pure, unadulterated romance. Dust kicked up on the deck as his legs spun like a drill. He launched himself toward the island like a guided missile, screaming at the top of his lungs. "I'M COMING, MY GODDESSES! YOUR KNIGHT IS HERE!"
In the jungle clearing, Ben heard the approaching scream of a lovesick banshee.
Ben didn't even turn his head. He simply raised his right hand, his eyes flashing gold.
"Ruler's Authority."
Sanji, mid-flight and moving at supersonic speeds, suddenly hit an invisible, solid wall of telekinetic force.
YANK.
Ben grabbed Sanji by the collar of his suit using pure gravity. He suspended the cook in mid-air, exactly ten feet off the ground and five feet behind the crew. Sanji dangled there helplessly, his legs still running in the air like a cartoon character, his arms reaching desperately toward the Kuja warriors.
"LET ME GO, MAGICIAN!" Sanji wailed, crying anime tears as he swam through the empty air. "THEY ARE REAL! I MUST BASK IN THEIR PRESENCE! UNHAND ME!"
"Quiet, cook," Ben sighed, keeping his hand raised to hold the struggling chef in place. "I don't want you getting us executed for degeneracy."
The Kuja warriors stared at the massive group of intruders, the giants, the cyborg, the skeleton, and the floating, screaming man in absolute bewilderment.
"What... what kind of creature is that?" Margaret asked, pointing a trembling arrow at Sanji. "Is it a sick bird?"
"Ignore him, please," Nami stepped forward, offering a polite, disarming smile. She raised her hands to show she wasn't hostile. "We apologize for the intrusion. We are not here to attack you. We are simply looking for our Captain."
"Your Captain?" a taller warrior with dark hair, Sweet Pea, narrowed her eyes, surveying the strange assembly. "We do not allow outsiders on Amazon Lily! Especially not men!"
"He's hard to miss," Nami continued patiently, hoping to de-escalate the situation. "He's a young man, about this tall. He wears a red vest, blue shorts, and a very distinct straw hat. He's made of rubber, and he probably fell from the sky yesterday."
The Kuja warriors exchanged a sudden, wide-eyed look. The tension in the clearing visibly shifted. The hostility didn't vanish, but it was replaced by a deep, cautious realization.
Margaret slowly lowered her snake-bow, gesturing for the other warriors to do the same.
"The rubber man," Margaret said, her voice dropping slightly. "He... he belongs to your crew?"
"Unfortunately, yes," Usopp sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Is he okay? Did he eat all your food?"
"He is fine," Margaret replied, looking at the diverse, strange crew before her. She glanced at the floating Sanji, then back to Nami. "He is currently residing in the grand palace. He is a guest of the Snake Princess... our Empress, Boa Hancock."
"Guest?" Robin raised an elegant eyebrow. "That is surprisingly hospitable for an island that forbids outsiders."
"He... did a great service for the Empress," Sweet Pea muttered vaguely, her cheeks flushing slightly. "Follow us. We will take you to him."
The Kuja warriors turned, forming an escort to lead the massive pirate crew deeper into the island toward the mountain village.
"Thank you," Nami said, gesturing for the crew to follow.
They began the long trek up the stone paths toward the Kuja capital. The jungle was beautiful, filled with exotic flowers and strange wildlife.
Throughout the entire hike, the atmosphere remained bizarrely comedic.
Sanji continued to be completely immobilized by Ben's Ruler's Authority. Ben walked calmly with his hands in his pockets, while Sanji simply floated in mid-air right behind him, suspended by an invisible force.
"Please!" Sanji begged, making swimming motions. "Just let my feet touch the ground! I promise I will be a gentleman! I just want to offer them a rose! Ben! Magician! Have mercy!"
Ben didn't look back, maintaining the telekinetic grip effortlessly. "No. You have lost your walking privileges until we leave this island. Consider it a protective measure for global diplomacy."
"I HATE YOU!" Sanji sobbed, floating along helplessly as the Straw Hats made their way to meet the most beautiful, and most dangerous, Empress in the world.