Ethan Knox - November 2120
The sound of birds singing outside the window slowly pulls me out of sleep.
For a moment I just lie there, warm and heavy beneath the blankets, my body refusing to move. Sunlight spills softly through the curtains, pale and gold, painting the room in the kind of quiet that only exists early in the day.
I stretch my arms above my head with a tired groan, feeling more rested than I have in weeks.
Honestly, it's probably the best sleep I've had in a long time.
The bed hasn't felt right without Kai in it. It felt too cold and empty. Every night he was gone felt wrong in a way I couldn't explain, like my body kept waking up searching for something it already knew was missing.
Half asleep, I reach out beside me.
My hand collides with warmth. It's so solid and real.
Kai.
My eyes open properly then.
He's still asleep beside me, curled slightly onto his side, breathing slow and steady against the pillow. His dark hair is a complete mess, falling across his face in soft uneven strands, and even now he still looks exhausted. There are faint shadows beneath his eyes, traces of everything he's been through lingering around him like bruises the body can't fully heal yet.
But compared to the hospital bed… compared to those machines…
He looks alive.
The sight of him sends something warm and painful through my chest all at once.
I shift closer automatically, careful not to disturb him, and brush the hair gently away from his face. My fingertips trace softly along his cheek, feather-light so I don't wake him, before drifting to the scar on his face.
The same scar he's had since the day I met him.
My chest aches fondly at the memory.
He'd looked younger back then, sharper around the edges but somehow softer too. Beautiful in the kind of way that caught me completely off guard. I remember seeing him for the first time and feeling something settle instinctively inside me, this quiet certainty that I wanted him near me.
Always.
I just never imagined loving someone could become this terrifying... Or this important.
Leaning forward, I press a soft kiss to his forehead, letting my lips linger there for a second longer than necessary. If I could, I think I'd stay here forever.
Just like this.
In a warm bed, a quiet room and Kai breathing beside me. Nothing else. Then I glance toward the clock and immediately sit upright.
"Wait, what?"
01:00 p.m.
How the hell did we sleep that long?
I stare at the numbers another second like they might rearrange themselves into something less alarming before my attention snaps back to Kai.
Worry creeps into my chest almost instantly.
Kai never sleeps this late... Ever.
Usually he's awake before sunrise, already dressed and halfway through doing something productive by the time I even open my eyes. Seeing him this deeply asleep makes panic curl sharply through me before I can stop it.
What if he's still sick?
I move quickly, placing my hand against his forehead, expecting heat. But his skin feels normal. Cool, soft, alive beneath my touch.
I exhale shakily, trying to calm myself. Maybe he's just exhausted. After everything that happened, anyone would be.
Still… something restless keeps clawing at me. I need him awake. I need to hear him, I need proof he's okay.
My hand cups his cheek a little more firmly this time.
"Kai," I murmur softly.
Nothing.
My stomach twists.
Kai's always been a light sleeper. Usually all it takes is me moving too much and he's already awake, mumbling complaints at me while still half asleep. But now he doesn't react at all and fear rushes back immediately.
I shake his shoulder gently. "Hey, Kai?"
My voice betrays me completely, panic slipping into it despite how hard I try to hide it.
"Wake up."
For a horrible second nothing happens. Then finally, a small groan leaves him.
"...Ethan?"
His voice is rough with sleep, quiet and tired and unmistakably him. Relief crashes through me so hard it almost hurts. Before I can stop myself, I lunge forward and wrap my arms tightly around him, pulling him against my chest like I need physical proof he's still here.
Kai makes another sleepy sound, confused more than anything, but his arms slowly slide around me in return.
"What's wrong?" he murmurs, voice still thick with exhaustion.
"Nothing," I lie instantly. "I'm just… glad I get to wake up next to you again."
It sounds embarrassingly honest.
I pull back just enough to look at him and immediately my heart becomes completely useless. He looks so sleepy.
His eyes are barely open, hair sticking out everywhere, expression soft and confused in that adorable dazed way people only look seconds after waking up. He looks like he could fall asleep again at any moment if I stopped holding him upright.
It hits me with such overwhelming affection that I almost laugh.
Or combust... Possibly both.
God, he's cute.
My chest feels too small to contain how much I love him. I bury my face back against him and hug him tighter, unable to help myself. Kai lets out a quiet scoff of laughter beneath me, warm and breathy, his arms tightening around my waist before he presses a sleepy kiss against my temple.
"What time is it?" he asks.
"It's one in the afternoon."
I feel him stiffen slightly. Even half asleep, that apparently horrifies him.
"Have you eaten yet?" he asks immediately, concern threading into his tired voice without hesitation.
I can't help smiling a little against his shoulder.
Typical Kai.
"No," I admit, shaking my head. "I only just woke up too."
Kai lets out a soft, tired sigh against me, the kind that sounds halfway between relief and disappointment.
"Did you sleep in because of me?" he murmurs quietly.
I pull back just enough to look at him properly. "I slept in because my boyfriend is apparently a human weighted blanket and I finally get to appreciate it again."
A sleepy smile tugs at the corner of his mouth.
There he is.
That tiny expression alone feels like sunlight breaking through clouds after weeks of storms.
"You're dramatic" he mutters.
"And you love me for it."
Kai's eyes drift shut again for a second, like he's losing a battle with sleep. "Of course."
I grin so hard my face hurts.
God, I missed this.
Not the big moments. Not the dangerous ones. Just this. Kai being sarcastic before his brain is fully awake. The quiet warmth of him pressed against me. The way he automatically keeps one hand resting on my side like he needs to know I'm still there too.
For a little while neither of us says anything. We just stay tangled together beneath the blankets while sunlight slowly fills the room around us. The birds outside continue singing like the world has decided today deserves softness.
I trace slow patterns against the back of Kai's hand with my thumb.
I feel completely trapped by him.
In the warmth of the bed, the softness of his voice, the slow rhythm of his breathing against me. My brain feels hazy in the nicest possible way, like the entire world has narrowed down to this one quiet moment and I never want to leave it.
Then Kai's stomach growls loudly between us.
The sound is so unexpected that I blink, pulled out of the trance immediately.
For half a second there's silence.
Then horror hits me.
"Kai."
He hasn't had a proper meal in weeks. Not since the burnout.
The realisation crashes into me all at once and I pull back from him so quickly it almost looks dramatic. Which, okay, maybe it is a little dramatic, but I don't care.
"Oh my God, you must be starving."
I practically launch myself off the bed, nearly tangling myself in the blankets as panic and concern instantly take over. My mind starts racing through possibilities at lightning speed.
Food... Water... Something warm. Something easy on his stomach. Soup? Toast? Maybe soup and toast.
Behind me, Kai makes a soft sound of protest.
I turn back toward the bed just in time to see him weakly reaching one arm toward me, fingers barely lifting from the blankets before exhaustion seems to drag him back down again. His hand falls back onto the mattress and his eyes droop sleepily.
It's ridiculously cute.
Dangerously cute.
"You need food" I tell him firmly, pointing at him like I'm accusing him of crimes against nutrition.
Kai blinks at me slowly, still buried beneath the blankets, hair a complete mess. "I'm fine."
"You are absolutely not fine," I argue immediately. "You haven't eaten properly in ages."
"Can't we just stay like this a bit longer?" he murmurs.
That voice should genuinely be illegal.
There's something so soft about him right now that it hits me directly in the chest. The sleepy look in his eyes, the way his arm is still half reaching toward me like he wants me back beside him, the quiet honesty in his voice when he asks to stay.
It almost works instantly.
For one reckless second I seriously consider diving straight back into bed, wrapping myself around him again, and ignoring the existence of responsibilities entirely.
Honestly, if love was a weapon, Kai could probably level cities with one sleepy expression.
But no.
I need to be sensible for at least five minutes.
"Okay," I say carefully, trying very hard to sound like a responsible adult and not someone moments away from folding completely. "Here's the plan. We get food, and then we come straight back here and spend the entire day in bed doing absolutely nothing."
Kai watches me quietly for a second, like he's weighing whether that compromise is acceptable.
Then he rolls onto his back dramatically and lets out a long sigh toward the ceiling.
"Fine."
______________________________
Even the walk to the canteen feels different.
Usually Kai walks slightly alert without meaning to, focused on wherever he's going, mind already three steps ahead of the rest of us.
But today he stays beside me.
Well… technically half a step behind me.
His hand stays loosely wrapped around mine the entire walk, warm and heavy like he's holding on through instinct more than thought. Every so often I feel his grip tighten briefly before relaxing again, and twice I catch him spacing out.
It's strange seeing him like this. He seems softer...Sleepier. Less guarded somehow. Honestly, it feels completely out of character and yet weirdly precious at the same time.
"You look like you're about to fall asleep standing up" I tease, glancing sideways at him.
Kai rolls his eyes immediately, though the effect is weakened slightly by the fact he looks seconds away from walking directly into a wall.
"I'm awake."
"Your eyes were closed for half that sentence."
"They were resting."
I laugh softly under my breath. God, I missed this. The little dry comments. The way he pretends he's unaffected while still refusing to let go of my hand.
I squeeze his fingers gently before pushing open the canteen doors.
The moment we step inside, noise rushes toward us.
Voices overlap from every direction, trays clatter, chairs scrape against the floor, conversations bounce around the room in messy waves of sound and warmth.
Then it all stops... Completely.
The silence hits so suddenly it almost feels unreal. My smile fades slightly as I look up. Every single person in the room is staring at us. Or more specifically… At Kai.
Dozens of wide-eyed expressions lock onto him at once, shock rippling across the canteen so visibly it almost moves like a physical thing. Some people are half standing already. Others look like they've forgotten how to blink.
Kai pauses beside me too, his posture stiffening faintly.
And then suddenly-
"KAI!" The shout tears across the room.
Jack practically launches himself out of his seat, chair screeching violently behind him as he runs straight toward us at full speed. For one genuinely alarming second I think he's about to tackle both of us into the floor.
But he stops just in time.
Barely.
"You're finally awake" Jack blurts out breathlessly, and despite how excited he sounds, there's something shaky underneath it.
Kai looks slightly stunned by the reaction for a second before something gentler settles into his expression.
He reaches down automatically and ruffles Jack's hair.
"Sorry," he says quietly. "I've been asleep for a while."
Jack laughs once, but it comes out uneven.
"I thought you were never going to…" He cuts himself off quickly, swallowing the rest of the sentence. "Don't think you can fall behind on your tasks just because you've been unconscious."
A soft smile appears on Kai's face.
"I wouldn't dare."
And that's apparently all it takes. The room erupts.
People begin moving all at once, conversations crashing back into existence in louder, faster waves as everyone starts crowding toward him. Questions overlap each other immediately.
"How are you feeling?"
"You scared the hell out of us."
"You look awful."
"We missed you."
"Don't ever do that again."
Some of them laugh while they say it, but I can hear the truth underneath every word. These people were scared. Kai almost died and it shook all of them harder than they probably realised.
And now he's standing here alive.
Talking and smiling, even if it's small.
I watch Kai carefully as everyone gathers around him. At first he looks slightly overwhelmed by the attention, but he handles it the way he always does, quiet composure settling over him naturally as he answers questions and lets people fuss over him without complaint.
He deserves this.
More than anyone.
So I step back a little to give him space. The moment I do, my shoulder bumps lightly into someone behind me. I turn and find Finn standing there, hands tucked into his coat pockets, watching the scene with that calm unreadable expression he always wears.
"How's he doing?" he asks quietly enough that nobody else hears.
My smile fades slightly.
"He seems okay," I answer honestly, glancing back toward Kai again. "But…" I hesitate. "He spaces out sometimes."
The words sit heavily between us, because Finn understands immediately what I mean.
I know I need to tell him the truth. Him and Noah know Kai almost as deeply as I do, maybe deeper in certain ways. If something's wrong, they need to know.
Finn's eyes drift back toward Kai, thoughtful.
"Like at the cliff?" he asks rubbing his wrist.
"Not exactly," I say quickly. "He comes back out of it pretty fast. It's just…" I struggle for the wording. "Sometimes he looks far away for a second."
Like part of him still hasn't fully returned.
Finn grows quiet at that, gaze sharpening slightly as he studies Kai from across the room. For a moment I can practically see him piecing things together internally.
Then he nods once.
"I'll let Noah know."
At the mention of Noah, I glance around the canteen automatically.
"Speaking of Noah…" My eyes scan the room again. "Where is he?"
Finn sighs softly beside me. When I look at him I only just notice the exhaustion showing through this calmness.
"He went straight to the lab after Kai fell unconscious again" he says. "He's been there all night."
My chest tightens slightly. Of course he has.
While I deal with fear by clinging tighter, refusing to leave Kai's side for even a second, Noah handles it the only way he knows how, by burying himself inside work until exhaustion replaces emotion.
And really… That's what makes him and Kai so alike. They both carry pain like something private. Something to dissect quietly instead of share. The difference is Kai lets me pull him back out of it sometimes.
I look across the room again just as Kai laughs softly at something Jack says, tired but real, and warmth spreads through my chest so suddenly it almost hurts.
He's here.
Not unconscious in a hospital bed.
Not lost in shadows.
Just here.
Holding conversations and breathing. Existing beside us again. And somehow the entire world feels lighter because of it.