The first thing he noticed was a rough sensation at the back of his head and shoulders. Slowly, his blurred vision focused, and he realised he was lying on the ground. An empty bottle lay next to him, the smell of strong alcohol still wafting up from within it. He slowly got to his feet and looked around. He was on a balcony overlooking snowy mountain peaks and foothills of thick pine forest. Just below the balcony was a large ornate garden.
One would have expected the landscape to be drenched in the many colors of life, various shades of green and rich brown crowned in the myriad colors of blooming flowers. That was not the case. While color existed, it was subdued and washed out as if looking at an old, faded photograph. Every color was dark, verging on gray, and there was no wind. Strange objects that felt out of place dotted the landscape. A grandfather clock here, an impossibly tall stack of plates there. To put it simply, the entire place was a chaotic mess.
He looked down at his own hands, which were the familiar hands of a person but transparent, like those of a ghost.
"Looks like a drank myself to sleep again." He muttered to himself, his voice croaky.
Something at the back of his mind told him he should have had a pounding headache, though he had no idea where that information had come from. There was a twinge in his temple, but just like the landscape it was very much washed out and barely perceptible.
Noticing that a small drop of liquid remained inside, he grabbed the bottle and took a drink. The liquid, despite its complete lack of taste, felt familiar, though he could not even fathom why.
The view ought to have been breathtaking and the drink satisfying, but he felt nothing of the sort. There was no joy to be found here, no reason for living, though live he did.
"Have to keep on keeping on, I suppose. Even if there's no worth in it all."
Leaving the view and empty bottle behind, he turned his back and entered the building behind him through a large wooden door.
Inside, the hallway seemed to continue endlessly before disappearing into the gloom. Countless doors lined both sides, spaced evenly apart.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw something sparkle softly on the ground, a mote of light that glowed in the gloom of its surroundings. Curious, he bent down and touched the light.
FLASH
The world was fire, snow and stone. Cold and heat met in an impossible union that granted neither warmth nor refreshment. Corpses littered the ground, and a single figure knelt nearby with their hands covering their face in anguish.
The young woman cried. Her howls pierced through the crackling roars of the surrounding flames. All around her, the corpses lay silent, an impenetrable wall allowing no escape. This was her doing after all. She would not be permitted to flee.
Slowly, her hands fell to her sides and, having only a single blue eye, the other covered by an eyepatch, she stared into the flames.
There was but one thing to do, here at the end of everything.
Slowly, she got up. Her tattered black dress — torn, burnt and bloody, whipped in the icy wind. She took a step forward.
The air grew hotter.
Another step and it grew hotter still. Now, she had to cover her face. Her pace slowed.
"Just another few steps and it'll all be over." She mumbled.
Her foot fell on hard ground, the snow melted away by the raging inferno. The heat was unbearable. Just another step.
Pain. The pain was too much, and so she screamed. However, that only allowed the heat inside her mouth. It was too much. She wanted to be away, to get away from this pain. She fell to her knees, covering her body with her arms in a futile effort to protect herself. This was it, an end burned to ashes in hellfire. She deserved no less.
"If you had the chance to spend an eternity with them with no goodbyes or partings, would you take it?"
A voice, sounding like that of a young girl, innocent and curious. She opened her one remaining eye, though she was uncertain if even that remained. Ahead, silhouetted by flames, was a figure.
"Help me, I don't wanna die." She moaned.
"Yes, that's just the expression I was looking for. I think you will do just nicely."
A pale hand of smoothest skin appeared through the flames and grabbed hold of hers. As she was pulled from the fire, she looked to the side where a young man lay unconscious in the snow. He had long brown hair and sharp features, which were blackened by soot. His kind face, which was often full of confidence and mirth, was now twisted in a pained expression.
"I will see you again." She whispered. "Promise."
And then the world went white.
FLASH
He fell backwards on the spot. Panting, he patted his entire body with his hands trying to put out the fire that was no longer there. The scorching flames still fresh in his memory. The feelings of pain and suffocation took a few moments to dissipate as he looked around. He was once again in the endless hallway and he was not on fire. Just a vision of some sort.
Regret. That was it. An important emotion that he had not yet forgotten, even after all these years. It was part of him, and it defined him.
He slowly got to his feet. The sparkling mote that had brought on the memory was nowhere to be seen, and so he continued onward aimlessly. He opened a door at random. Behind the door lay another long corridor that gradually twisted until the roof became the floor and the floor the roof.
"Nothing too unusual today." He said, sighing in relief.
A single thought born from the memory of fire spurred him onward. As he walked, he expected difficulty given the geometry of the place, but the floor remained firmly under his feet. When he looked back, the open door behind him was upside down as was the other hallway behind it. He turned and continued onward.
He passed by various doors along the way and checked each one without entering fully. First, a grand cathedral with tall columns and stained glass windows, all covered in various plants so as to resemble a natural forest. Not in a manner that would suggest overgrowth but a deliberately grown addition to the building, complimenting the architecture. Behind the next door, a massive library whose floors extended upwards well beyond sight. The number of books looked as infinite as the spiral staircase in the center that rose upwards.
He paused once he beheld the impressive library.
"Hey do you like books?"
An image of two children, one sitting beneath a flowering tree and another standing over them, flashed in his mind.
He turned and hastily made his way out of the room.
He continued to encounter strange rooms for some time afterwards. He didn't know for sure what kept him moving. Well, it wasn't like he had anything better to do than go for a walk. Not until she had finished at least. Perhaps he could go find some food? He didn't feel particularly hungry. He had almost completely forgotten the feeling of hunger. Just like thirst, it didn't affect him here.
Down yet another impossibly long and twisting corridor lay yet another upside down door. Hoping to find something of interest, he twisted the knob and stepped inside.
It appeared to be a study. Though where the rest of the rooms had been constructed with stone blocks, this room appeared more as if it were carved from the stone itself. Various pieces of stone were cut to create things that resembled furniture — chairs, tables and bookshelves. At the far end of the cave were a fine wooden desk and chair, standing out in the stone surroundings, and on that chair sat a person.
When he stepped inside, the figure turned and got to their feet. Wrapped in a black cloak and hood, their appearance resembled a shadow. She was slight and pale, with long unkempt black hair spilling down from within the hood. The most striking thing however, was a large scar running down the right side of her face and a patch covering her right eye.
"Tell me, do you like books?" She asked with a smile. Her lips were cracked and red from various sores around the mouth.
Words, yes. He understood that the cloaked young woman was speaking to him. He opened his mouth and spoke for the first time in what felt like decades.
"Is it... ready?" He asked
"My, so impatient. Aren't you going to say hello, Dean? I've been looking forward to seeing you again. How many years has it been?"
He hung his head. A sharp pain radiated from his chest, and he had difficulty looking the woman in the eye. She regarded them in silence for a moment.
"It's Tatiana. I hope you're just drunk and haven't forgotten my name again. Surely you're not that far gone."
Her words were filled with worry and concern, but there was also a hint of cruelty in her voice, threatening him with pain if it turned out he had actually forgotten her name.
"I would never forget." He said simply.
"Good, now come. I've finished."
They left the room together. Tatiana looked back at him as she half guided, half dragged him down the corridor.
Tatiana. That name brought back unpleasant memories, and a wave of anxiety washed over him. He gripped the hand holding his all the tighter, eliciting a chuckle from his guide.
"Don't worry, Dean. I'll never let you go. Not ever." She said sweetly.
They passed by several more doors and even went up a staircase that for certain appeared to be going down but twisted and warped until he was no longer quite certain which direction they were going in.
"Ah, this one should do it." Tatiana said as they stopped in front of a door.
She opened it, and beyond they found a bedroom. It felt normal, almost comforting. The room contained some basic furniture: a bed, a bedside table, a desk and a chair. Not finely made, but sturdy and reliable. On the walls hung various drawings of plants and animals. Reference books and encyclopedias lay haphazardly on the desk and near the bed.
Some small medicine bottles littered the bedside table along with some bloody cloth and a black leather book.
"Say, if someone is fated to die young and in great pain, does that give them the right to treat others with cruelty? Should they be forgiven for their crimes when their circumstances are taken into account?"
As she spoke her question, Tatiana moved towards the book and picked it up.
"That's it?" He asked, eagerness filling his voice.
Tatiana laughed.
"Yes, my new book. I know how much you've been looking forward to it, Dean. Just so you know, I've placed all my love and feelings towards you into these pages."
He reached out quickly, attempting to grab the book from her hands. She pulled it away quickly and his fingers missed it by an inch.
"Not quite yet. While I'm flattered you think so highly of my work, I can't help but be concerned. You're becoming more hollow, Dean. Do not forget why you are here. You aren't allowed to rest. Not now, not ever." Tatiana told him.
Her eye was wide with madness as she seemed to stare directly into his soul. The reason he was here. He knew the reason. It was probably the only thing he could remember after all these years.
She reached out, her hand appearing from the cloak like a flash of lightning. And grabbed his arm. Her arm and hand were almost skeletal and had cuts, bruises and burn marks all over them. The strength of her grip surprised him. He could not resist as she thrust the book into his hands. Despite his hands being transparent, the book did not fall but rested in his grip.
"Read it and do not forget who you are or you will be lost to me forever." She hissed. "I've made this one a little more personal, so it should help you remember a little. Do not even think about rest, you got that?"
He looked down at the book in their hands. Only pain lay within those pages. Of that he was certain. However, that was exactly what he was looking for.
"Witness the sins of those who once called this place home and remember who you are. Above all, don't forget I'll be watching, always watching."
With those last words from Tatiana, he opened the book, and the world was engulfed in light.