[After the template similarity is announced, if your similarity level is below 50%, you will be punished with a penalty that is reversely proportional to your similarity to the 0% level. The penalty for 30% similarity is to suffer from the diseases that the character in the template has suffered throughout his entire life and to feel the pain that he has suffered throughout his entire life. And the time of the penalty is exactly 3 minutes after the description of the template similarity]
[Penalty debuffs you currently have:
- cold: remaining duration 2 days
- diarrhea: remaining time 5 minutes
- flu: remaining time 2 days
- tooth decay: remaining time 9 days
- bone resorption: 1 month
- chronic intestinal inflammation: 1 month]
Are these all the diseases I have now?
[Yes, Host. No punishment is permanent unless your template percentage is 0. Also, some diseases disappeared before you woke up]
But Orochimaru told me I had end-stage bone cancer.
He was wrong?
But how can he be wrong with end-stage bone cancer? If I remember correctly, people with end-stage bone cancer have constant pain in their bones and their bones can easily break like glass. Also, people with end-stage bone cancer look as weak as matchsticks. Someone like Orochimaru wouldn't miss it.
Wait a minute. If I really had end-stage bone cancer, Tsunade should've caught it very early? Something doesn't fit.
There must be something.
It's something I missed.
Can you detect diseases that are already in my body?
[No]
Something...
Brittle bones... Osteoporosis?
I'm still confused about something. I need a medical book.
And I know where I can get a medical book, in Orohimaru's library, of course.
I realized how powerless I was when I wanted to act on the plan I had in my head.
Hmm. I think I need to go to the bathroom.
[Penalty - diarrhea. Penalty time completed and debuff disappeared]
Hmm. I think I don't need to go to the bathroom.
In the meantime, there are good things about approaching death.
Just like the poet said;
I used to have a turquoise hat.
I used to pass by people.
How they praised my hat.
They said blue made me look young.
One day when I was wearing my turquoise hat.
The doctor said you have cancer.
As I lay in a bed more comfortable than the one at home.
My visitors kept praising my turquoise hat.
It seems that being deathly ill has not only given me better living conditions but also made people treat me more like a human being.
For the first time in a long time I felt something called air in my lungs. How easy it was to breathe without the cold stone walls that didn't want me to breathe the air that was mine.
The sun shines through a huge window, there is a warm sweetness in the air instead of a cold predatory feeling, I can hear children's voices coming from outside.
Judging by the proximity of the children's voices, I was brought to a place far from the cave and the laboratories, but close to the village center.
So this is what it's like to be treated like a human being. Hah, I missed it...
The great transition from a cold cave cellar with no windows to a room with white walls and blessed with a huge window.
Damn, I wonder if I could look out the window and see children running and smiling and having fun on the street.
My psychological health really needs it.
Hours passed without realizing it, listening to the sounds of children playing outside and trying to find peace as it slowly started to get dark.
There were two knocks on the door of the room from outside. I forced myself to sit up a little in bed, but to no effect. I have no choice but to give up and invite my guest inside, who continues to wait at the door for my permission as if I were a real person and not a prisoner.
*door creaks*
"Is that you, Kabuto?"
"Yes..."
Kabuto didn't speak as he continued to look at me, but I could see the curiosity in his eyes. He was probably wondering why I had suddenly become like this when I was perfectly healthy.
Poor boy, it must have frightened him to see the person who had so ruthlessly exploited his sympathy suddenly dying.
Haha that's funny...
I was actually going to use this opportunity to get more sympathy by pretending to have been born with a fatal disease, but Kabuto was the first to open his mouth.
"Why?"
Before I could ask him what why in response, he yelled at me in a voice that sounded like a roar.
"WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO!!!"
A real roar. The winds behind the roar did not blow the covers off the room, but all the thoughts that had just been circulating in my head were pushed into the void by the roar.
I looked at Kabuto and saw him holding out one trembling hand toward me, his eyes red enough to make the Uchiha jealous.
He looks really angry.
He seems even more angry than me , when I thought I had just been killed by the system.
When I wanted to hit him back, I realized that the brat had scared me to the point that my tongue was hanging out. Or was it murderous intent?
"What... I... did... you think..."
"Do you think this is completely normal? Right after you told me you don't know anything about poisons, I suddenly saw you fall to the ground covered in blood!"
What the hell is he talking about?
More importantly, why does he want to kill me?
Should I scream?
Will Orochimaru save me?
No, I don't think so.
"Talk to me! For real this time! Why did you want to commit suicide! If you wanted to commit suicide, why did you try to be my friend? Did you just want to hurt me or did it give you some kind of sick pleasure?"
Seriously, what is this lunatic talking about?
Okay, let's calm down. Huff...
"Calm the fuck down first, Kabuto. And what the fuck suicide are you talking about?"
...
1 month later...
But today is not only the day of my discharge but also the day of my freedom.
After checking the calendar next to me, I did a quick calculation and realized that 99 days had passed since I arrived in this place , which has earned the right to be called a corner of hell.
That's almost three and a half months.
Since the day Orochimaru told me I had bone cancer, he never wanted to take any body or blood samples from me. And he finally started treating me like a human being because he saw that I wasn't useful to him.
And there is another important thing, as if all this is not enough to make me happy and God really wants to apologize to me.
*door tapping sound*
"Come in!"
The door opened extraordinarily cautiously and he entered cautiously carrying a large tray.
A mountain of hamburgers was lined up on the tray, which I could see from where I was sitting.
Kabuto was hesitant to hand me the tray and I could see it in his eyes.
I can guess the reason for this hesitation.
"You prepared the sauce like I said, didn't you, Kabuto?"
"Look, I don't think that's a good idea, man. Until just this morning you couldn't eat anything but soup, and you remember, whenever you ate anything solid, you couldn't get out of the bathroom. What happened to you now?"
When he answered me, he was still standing there with a mountain of hamburgers, ready to run away at any moment.
[All your punishments have expired]
[Debuff - Bone melt, removed]
[Debuff-Chronic intestinal inflammation, removed]
I was about to answer Kabuto when the pain in my stomach and in my whole body suddenly disappeared. The feeling of a pain that has been there for a long time suddenly disappearing is very similar to the feeling you get at the end of an erection.
I almost lost control for a moment and made a strange noise.
Fortunately I managed to stop myself quickly enough and swallowed the moan that reached the back of my throat with a smile and asked Kabuto to give me my burgers.
"Kabuto, this is not my first time dealing with this kind of illness, okay? I'm sure I've been giving my body the opportunity to heal for long enough and the medicine Orochimaru gave me is quite effective. I think I'm ready now."
Kabuto was still not convinced. Dead fish eyes looked at me and asked if I was sure and I gave the same answer.
"Yes, I'm sure. It's my final decision. Let's do it."
When Kabuto still didn't hand over the tray, I surprised him by suddenly standing up and grabbing the tray.
All this time he must have been used to seeing that even if I got out of bed, I did so uncomfortably and slowly, so that he couldn't really hide the tray from me in his surprise.
"Like I said, Kabuto. I think I'm cured now. I want one last meal with you and then I need Orochimaru's permission to leave."
Kabuto, meanwhile, recovered from his surprise and sat across the bed from me with the Japanese liquor he had brought.
Normally eating in bed is uncomfortable for me, but since I think today will be my last day in this bed, it is no longer my problem.
When Kabuto ate one of the burgers he had prepared with my recipe, I saw the expression on his face that I had long wanted to see as the person who shared the recipe.
Since I have not been able to get out of bed for the past month, I spent this month doing something I have been planning for a long time.
One of my first answers to the question of how to make a living in this world was to open a burger stand here, but the burgers I made always paled in comparison to the other delicacies Konoha is famous for.
Even if I really opened a burger stand, it would probably be nothing more than an ordinary restaurant, and even that only goes so far.
Anyone who separated the two buns of a burger could easily get the full burger recipe. Probably within a week, the burger would be a menu item in every restaurant that sold meat. And that would mean the end of the small restaurant.
Unless there's a sauce that makes my burgers unimitable.
"I really should thank you, Kabuto. You're the one who made it possible for me to make this sauce in the past month... and don't worry, just like I promised, you'll get ten percent of the income from the restaurant I'm going to set up after I return to Konoha."
Kabuto can be a really good friend in some ways. For example, ever since I first told him I was going to open a restaurant and give him a share, he says he doesn't want anything from me, but I insist.
The main reason is that I knew that our friendship would wear out after we broke up, and even then I tried to maintain a bond with him. After all, even if he's not a Madara, he's still a strong enough villainous lead character.
"Why are you so sure Orochimaru will let you go? If you want, I can ask him for you. He won't refuse me because I am his student."
Kabuto put a big bite into his mouth, wiped his hands on his white apron and brought up the same topic again.
"Kabuto, even if you're Orochimaru's student, you can't often ask him for something as big as this, and most importantly, I can handle this on my own. I mean come on, look at me. We both know why Orochimaru is doing all these experiments. I don't have long to live and I've bought Orochimaru a lot of time by teaching you the basics. I don't think I'm worth ten million taels to him anymore and the kind of ransom offer I've prepared is much better than ten million taels."
"Orochimaru can still put you to work in the lab. You have proven yourself a good assistant. Let me ask him for it."
"No, Kabuto. He probably expects you to make such a request. More importantly, people like him don't like the presence of an insufficiently trusted person like me in his lab. And trust me a little. I've prepared a really good offer, and if he doesn't accept it, you can always take your chances."
Kabuto finally stopped talking about it and buried himself in the food again.
Apparently, my hamburger recipe had whetted even someone like Kabuto's appetite.
Wait for me, free and obese fire country. I'm coming!