I kept hearing the gathering's outcry. But i can't see a thing. I am hearing everything, pulling me on to a cart, rushing on to the ambulance, the CPR, Oxygen mask. I felt like I am there totally fine but can't see anything.
I understood that i am not giving up in my life. I want to live. I don't want to die that fast. I want to hug Johan again. Live somewhere happy, where will be no one. Just me and him. I want to see him again. I can't let him die for me. For my deed, by my enemy, for my sins.
I stopped hearing everything. Just the sound of that life support. So my heart is downing. So I am dying, Right?
I found my self somewhere so beautiful. I was feeling so light weighted. I am standing in the middle of a ocean where no ends. I am floating there as my feet drowned in the water. So misty winds. Then i seen few memory taps surrounded by me. Every memory, everything of mine. Meeting Johan, all my past bad deed's record, Scoffing not to enter this underworld and after a while all those vanished. Everything became dark.
I am landing somewhere. In a Hospital. I am seeing myself in an operation theater. How the doctor's trying to stop bleeding. Nurses screaming, the pulse rate and BP's getting low. I tried to touch thing's but i cant. I cant even touch my body out there either. I understood i have no time left, Beside someone's cart leaving front of me, face covered. After i saw the hand, my heart shattered into pieces. So it's Johan. They are taking him to the morgue. I ran after them. Just last one glance. I want to see him. Touch him again. Hug him tight. As they running forward I couldn't reach anymore. My soul leaving from there. Like something vacuuming me up. I am trying my best to stay there. But it's out of my strength. I gave up. It's time for leaving then.
Thanks God. At least I don't have to live with this burden. I don't deserve living. I am prepare for the hell.
I found myself standing in a sea shore. I felt i was there before. Maybe I lived there before. I am walking forward as my heart leading me. A mansion. So old and black the door was locked. Seemed like no one stays there. I touched the entrance door. My head stroked like with a thunder. I am remembering something. I lived there. It's that Island. So this my that house. Leaving with my parents. There accident. My head was bursting in pain. Like someone hitting with an axe. I couldn't take anymore. My heart pounding as it will explode. I tried not to fall, so that i reached to grab the front staircase I felt I am not in the surface. I cant touch anything anymore.
Before I could understand I felt two mysterious all black and tall like sky touching people grabbed me to take up. My eyes couldn't believe what's happening. If I am dead then I am supposed to be at hell. But what happening with me. My mouth like sealed. I can't even say a word. Just seeing everything with surprise. Then I became bound to them. Like they are taking me somewhere, Underworld?
A beautiful bridge. Two of that mysterious man standing beside there. Now i could see there head but that also covered with black bamboo conical cap. Though I could see it but They are still taller than any tall tree from earth. One came to me with a bowl of water. Signing me to drink. By there scary black appearance I couldn't help but obey but before that another came near gave me a flute, That jade ceramic flute . Maybe i seen it somewhere. Then I felt an awkward squeeze in my heart. Tear's dropping on the ground. I took it, as I touched it in a minute I fell on the ground. It's his. This is my Xiao Lin's.
I looked at them as they reached for me with that bowl. Then I looked around, I understood It's the River of Lethe flowing under this reincarnation passing bridge, and the water they giving me is that Lethe water.
I denied to drink it. I started to walking through the bridge and in the middle of their I felt I am disappearing. Then I looked back now i said,
I will born this time not to live for myself, Just for him.
I knew they couldn't pass this river as I passed the bridge, i vanished from there in an instant. That flute left there. It also crossed the bridge.