I kept staring at him in disbelief. My heart pounding in confusion. Deep down I wanted to believe him- but lucien's words echoed in my mind like a warning bell I couldn't silence. They're demon's.... don't trust them.
Ciel stepped closer.
His hand gently brushed against my cheek.
sending an unfamiliar warmth rushing through me. I turned red unable to stop the flush that bloomed across my face. Then, with a tenderness that made my heart ache, he cupped my face in his hands and then leaned in until our foreheads almost touched
"Do you really not remember me.... my love?"he asked softly, his eyes filled with a sorrow that made my chest tighten.
"No..." I whispered, the word catching in my throat. But even as I said it, guilt crept I like a shadow. why am I feeling this way? I thought.
Why does it hurt? I wasn't supposed to care I wasn't supposed to believe any of this was real. I wasn't supposed to feel like I had just broken his heart.
Still, I couldn't meet his gaze.
He offered me his hand, and I hesitated for a heartbeat..... then followed him out of the garden, the quiet sound of our footsteps echoing beneath the weight of everything I didn't yet understand.
We returned to the dining hall and sat down to eat in silence for a while. Then out of nowhere, he spoke casually.
"A welcoming ball will be held in a few days to celebrate your return home"
I nearly chocked on my food. "What?" I coughed staring at him in shock.
"I have to announce the presence of their queen," he said with a gentle smile.
"Queen?" I echoed trying to make sense of what he was saying.
"Yes," he replied simply "I am the king of this realm, and since I am your husband that makes you the queen"
Queen? of this realm? My head spun. A ball? for me? I felt this was just another one if his tricks- to make me feel I belonged in this world. A perfectly staged illusion. A performance.
"I don't want a Ball " I said firmly, putting my fork down. "I don't want to be apart of your tricks"
He stared at me for a long moment before sighing and looking away. "Arrangements have already been made. Invitations have already been sent out. I know you don't want this but you should do it. Maybe seeing farmiliar faces might help bring back your memories."
I looked down at my plate saying nothing. so I don't get a choice in this either, I thought bitterly. Fine I'll go along with the facade.... for now.
He stood up and walked towards me his eyes softening. Also we'll be spending time together tommorow," he said. "So rest up my love. We have a long day ahead of us."
Then he leaned down and kissed my forehead.
"Lila," he called "escort her back to her room once she's finished."
"Yes your highness," Lila said with a curtsy.
"Goodnight my love" he whispered, smiling down at me before walking away, leaving me with more questions than answers.
"I'm finished " I said gently dropping the knife onto my plate.
"Okay your highness" Lila replied softly, then stood and led me back to my room just like ciel had instructed.
Once we arrived, she helped me undress and gave me another warm bath, then changed me into a soft nightgown. One by one, she began extinguishing all the candles until the room dimmed into a calm darkness, lit only by moonlight peeking through the tall windows.
"Goodnight, Your highness," she said politely as she moved toward the door.
"Oh-Wait" she added, turning around with a warm smile. "If you need anything at all.... you can come to me."
Her kindness caught me off guard. I managed a small nod. " I will. Goodnight."
"Sleep well," she said, the quietly shut the door behind her.
I lay down, confused by her friendliness. We didn't know each other- at least not that I remembered. So why did she act like we shared a bond.
But I didn't dwell on it long. I was too tired. Slowly, I started to drift into sleep..... until I felt fingers gently stroking my hair.
My eyes fluttered open- and there he was.
"Lucien!" I gasped, instantly sitting up and throwing myself into his arms.
His warm laugh vibrated against my cheek as he held me tightly.
"Shhhh" he said softly gently pressing his Hands to my lips. "You don't want them to hear us, do you?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," I said pulling back, Slightly embarrassed.
"It's alright my princess," he whispered back, flashing that quick farmiliar smile that made my heart ache with warmth.
"They didn't hurt you did they?" Lucien asked concern glimmering in his eyes.
"No" I said quickly trying to reassure him. But the truth was, I didn't understand anything anymore. "Lucien what's going on? none of this makes sense?"
Lucien's expression grew serious. " I can't explain anything right now, Clara. But please be... careful. Those demon's are dangerous."
"Demon's" I repeated, confused. "Lucien what do you mean by demon's? where am I? why did they take me? How do I get back home? And what happened between you and Jason the other day? You asked him who he was at college- did you already know what he was?"
He stared at me for a long moment, his jaw tense.
"Clara, I know you want answers, but I can't give any to you right now. just listen to me: stay alert, and get close to the king.
"What!?" I blinked completely taken aback. You want me to get closer to the man who kidnapped me?"
"Yes" lucien said calmly but, yet firmly. "I know it sounds crazy but trust me. He won't hurt you- not yet, not if you stay close. Win his heart. pretend like you care. pretend like you love him if you have to.
"Lucien, how would that even protect me?" I asked confused and upset. Why do I have to play along?"
He leaned in, his voice grave "Do you trust me."
I hesitated, staring into his eyes. "Of course I do."
"Then do exactly as I say" he said "stay by his side. Make him believe in you. This is the only way you'll survive Clara."
"Lucien wait -"
But he already vanished again
"Lucien!" I called, reaching out, but he was gone.
But this time, I wasn't shaken. I had grown used to him vanishing like a ghost. But my mind..... my mind was spinning with everything he said.
Stay close to the king? pretend I love him? was that really the only way to survive in this place?
I lay back down, overwhelmed, my thoughts running wild. I thought about my mum...my dad.....Julie... lucien. My heart ached as I remembered how simple and safe life used to be. How warm breakfast tasted, how sunlight used to feel on my skin.
"I just want to go home," I whispered through the tears.
And then, in silence and sorrow, I cried myself to sleep.