The earth speaks in a scent that greets my sense of smell, petrichor. Behind the café window, I enjoy the falling rain accompanied by a cup of macchiato and americano. It revives a long-silent longing. My gaze is drawn to a couple arguing across the way. The angry woman decides to leave. The man runs alongside her, takes off his jacket, and drapes it over her head to shield her from the rain. It's hard to believe—how can they be hugging now, having just argued five minutes ago? Then they disappear. I close my eyes. It turns out I'm reminiscing again.
This feeling makes me wonder if you have ever felt the same way I do right now. Do you also see the remnants of memories left behind in all the places we have visited? Along the roads we have traveled? In our favorite foods and drinks? Will you?
My eyes shifted to the food on my table. My hand reached for a cup of macchiato, and a sip of coffee brought back memories of that time. It tasted the same as before, a bittersweet taste that overwhelmed me. I had been here too long, and several tables that had been occupied seemed to be empty now. I hurriedly left this place, a place too beautiful to be just a memory.
The reflection in the car window shows that the red dress I'm wearing today, paired with Louboutin heels, looks perfect on me. I admire myself so much. What's wrong with me? I'm rich, beautiful, and smart. There's no reason for a normal man to reject me, except for two things. First, if he's gay, and second, if he's you. Yes. You.
We're just friends, Lexie.
He always thought of me as just a friend. Yes, we were just friends. But I was the friend who got his first kiss.
I'm just a crazy woman fighting for her 15-year love. My first love, my first experience. Ocean Sterling.