The bags were ready. I looked once more at the room where I had spent most of my life and, deep down—way deep down—I knew I would miss it. The closet was almost empty, the bed neatly made, and above it still hung my photos with Rafael, my best friend and future apartment mate. On the walls, a few posters of my favorite movies and some of my own drawings.Art!I was just a step away from starting the college of my dreams, and I still could hardly believe that my lousy name had somehow enchanted the directors of Ghosteisd University. Even more shocking was realizing that all those biology and philosophy classes had actually paid off. Just a week after sending in my application video, I got the reply: accepted. The result? A huge Meneguchi family barbecue. In other words: one percent of the town had reason to celebrate.
Not that it was unusual. My family was big, and everything turned into a party. From the birth of Filó the calf to my cousin Iuri's C– in Math."At least you tried!" said my uncle, trying to comfort his son.
But that day, everyone was proud of me. At last, I would carry on the tradition of studying in the same place as my parents, grandparents, and even great-grandparents.For them, I was the hope of one day taking over the family flower shop.For me, it was the escape route to my dreams.
"Don't forget to take condoms, Azaleia!" Grandma shouted right in the middle of the circle around the bonfire, where we were roasting marshmallows. "The boys at Ghosteisd love breaking in girls with a clueless face like yours. Don't follow your mother's example."
I was horrified. My uncles laughed, used to Grandma's unfiltered style. Some cousins paid attention; the younger ones ran through the pasture."Mom!" my mother scolded, outraged."And why the fuss, Elena?" Grandma shot back, completely casual. "How do you think I met your father? Milking a cow? I went to parties too! And your father—God rest his soul—had big hands. Very big."
I covered my ears, traumatized.
My family was never normal. But I'll admit: sometimes I had fun. Especially when Grandma picked on my uncles' girlfriends and everyone gathered to watch the chaos. That, or when she switched into "Grandma news anchor" mode, narrating the gossip of the town: from Mr. João's bakery bread being late to speculations about how many men had been through the widow's bed on the corner.Itaphum might have only five thousand inhabitants, but there was never a lack of things to talk about.
**
Before leaving, I threatened my younger brother, Alisson, who had inherited my books."If I come back in winter and find any of them scribbled on or dog-eared, I'll tell Dad you changed the computer password.""I already told you I'll take care of them, Léia!" he grumbled, blushing. "And can you just forget that? I was gaming and the page opened on its own!""Sure…" I pretended to believe him. "But I'll let you keep my editions of Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings, and A Song of Ice and Fire…"He didn't even wait for me to finish before grinning wide and throwing himself at me."You're the best sister in the world!"
Even though he was four years younger—and taller than me—I was going to miss the brat.
**
I grabbed my suitcase and walked to the door, glancing one last time at my room. Every poster, every drawing, every corner seemed to whisper "goodbye." "Goodbye, old friend!" I thought, waving, a lump in my chest. I'd never again sleep within those walls, never again smell Grandma's cake fresh out of the oven on a Sunday morning. The room was empty, but the memories were loud."Who are you waving at, Léia?" my mom asked, suddenly appearing on the stairs."Jeez, Mom! Don't sneak up on me like that!"
At forty, Mom still looked young. She had married Dad early because I—the lovely narrator before you—arrived ahead of schedule. His dream of moving to the big city had gone down the drain, but I'd never seen him complain. They loved each other, and it was visible even now.
With her blonde hair tied back in a ponytail and a plain T-shirt over jeans, she hugged me tightly."I've been calling you for three days," she exaggerated, as always. "Rafael's already here. Do you really want to go? Because I'd love to have you working in the family shop."
Ah, yes. My parents owned a flower shop. Which is why my name is Azaleia. A flower name. Who in the twenty-first century does that to their daughter? Of course, my mom.
I sighed, my heart tightening. I wanted to be strong, but I couldn't deny that I was leaving a piece of myself behind."I'm going to miss you guys," I whispered, almost to myself.
She smiled, holding my hand and carefully fixing my suitcase."We'll miss you too, Princess Léia." Her eyes sparkled, and for a moment I thought I could hold on to that feeling forever. "Are you taking Chewbacca?""Mom! I'm not a kid anymore!" I protested, though I couldn't hide my smile.She raised an eyebrow, satisfied, when she brought Chewie in her arms."This way you'll be better off. When you feel homesick, just hug him. We'll be connected through the Force."
I laughed, my heart a little lighter, though still heavy."Alright, deal."
**
At the front door, Rafael was already waiting for me. He helped put the suitcase in the car while I said goodbye to my dad and to Arnaldo, my cat. I held onto the feline longer than I should have, each purr feeling like a silent farewell. "Take good care of the house without me," I whispered. He blinked lazily, as if he understood.
"Feels like yesterday I took you to your first day of school," Dad said, gripping my hand tightly. "You were six, thought I was a Jedi… and I laughed just watching you run across the yard. And now… now you're leaving, and I…" He swallowed hard, fighting back tears. "I'm not ready for this.""Oh, Dad…" I hugged him tight, feeling the warmth of his heart against mine. "But I am."
It was hard to leave them. But after long minutes of Dad holding back his tears and Mom shouting in the middle of the street, the car finally hit the road. Little by little, the streets and houses of Itaphum disappeared behind us. I pressed Chewbacca to my chest, breathing deeply, trying to hold on to every smell, every sound, every family laugh. I was leaving memories there… and taking with me a piece of home.
"So? Excited for your new life?" Rafael asked, trying to lighten the mood with a smile."As Buzz would say: to infinity and beyond!" I raised my hand like Superman, and he laughed.
Our apartment in Ghosteisd wasn't much, but it would do for four years of college. Me in Visual Arts, him in Architecture. An old dream since high school: living together. And for me, it would be the easiest thing in the world, since we'd known each other since childhood and got along super well.
With glasses, a scruffy beard, and curls blowing in the wind, Rafa had a discreet kind of beauty that made girls sigh. But he avoided the subject. I, however, believed college could change that. Just as it would change me.
While my parents had taught me to love Star Wars, I had secretly fallen in love with romantic comedies. I fantasized that, once in college, I would bump into the guy of my dreams and we'd live something worthy of Hollywood.
That might have happened in high school, but the boys in my town were way too rude to play the "leading man" role. Rafa didn't count. He was my best friend.
I sighed in excitement and turned on the radio. Country music was playing. I cranked up the volume, drumming on the seat until Rafa glanced sideways, trying not to laugh."Come on, Rafa!" I encouraged, nudging his shoulder. "Hear that? That's the sound of freedom!"
I started singing loudly, the wind tangling my hair. Little by little, the streets and houses of Itaphum were left behind.There, I left only memories.From now on, my dream was beginning. Ghosteisd would be the escape route to my dreams… and, without me realizing it, it held something far greater than I could ever imagine.