I am finally here - my Reiki attunement class. I'm fifteen minutes late, and my nervousness is written all over my zombie-like face.
I try to focus on the ceremony, but the nightmare from last night won't let me rest. Fear and insecurity keep circling back, making me flinch at the slightest sound. But no, I tell myself, I have to stand stronger. Once this attunement is complete, I'll heal not just my body, but also the fear born from that dream.
The Reiki Master calls my name. My stomach drops. I was fine earlier, but after last night, my thoughts are scattered.
I walk into the room and sink into a leather chair so soft that I could fall asleep instantly. The atmosphere is cozy, with the dim red glow of lamps and the fragrance of sandalwood and frankincense curling through the air. Sage smoke swirls gently around the room. For the first time today, I begin to relax.
The Master asks me to close my eyes. I obey.
Darkness blurs my vision.
Oh no. I feel like I'm back in last night's nightmare. Silence presses in. Panic rises in my chest. My breath falters. I almost open my eyes, until a warm palm rests gently on my shoulder.
Relief floods me. It's her hand. Soothing vibrations calm my body. The fear inside me retreats, as though she sensed it before I even spoke.
"Calm down," she whispers.
I take deep breaths, trying to slow my racing heartbeat. Her voice guides me through the ritual. She tells me that even if I fall asleep, it will not affect the ceremony. For once, that sounds like a blessing.
Ten minutes pass, and I feel myself slipping into a deep sleep. Her voice fades. Flashes of white light disturb me. And then there it is. The same white light I saw last night.
Wait. Am I back in that dream?
The Master had said that visions of light and vibrations may appear during attunement. Perhaps the light that saved me in my dream was part of this?
My thoughts spiral. I move closer to the light. The sparkles are the same, the ones that healed me. But as I step into it, my body shakes violently. I want to run, to open my eyes, but I can't. I'm stuck. Fear surges again.
Just as I am about to cry, the light shines brighter blindingly bright. Something begins to pour out of me. I glance down. Black water seeps from my body, pooling at my feet. The light is washing me clean.
I should feel grateful, but instead, I'm terrified. What is happening to me?
"Hold on," the Master's voice cuts through. "You're surrounded by heavy energy. Your attunement is more intense than usual. Trust the light. Trust the Universe. They won't harm you."
Her words anchor me. I breathe deeply. Slowly, fear loosens its grip.
I look again. The black water vanishes, replaced by dark smoke rising from my body. This must be the negative energy she spoke of. I don't resist. I let it leave.
Relief spreads through me. I feel lighter, calmer. The smoke disappears. Now the white light no longer showers me, it flows into me, filling my veins, rushing through my nerves.
"You can come back now," the Master says softly. "Open your eyes, dear."
I open them to find tears streaming down my face. She gazes at me tenderly and says, "The ceremony is complete. You are now attuned to the energy."
Later that Day-
After a refreshing bath, I sit in my room. The Master advised me to meditate before sleep, so I can feel the universal energy flowing through me.
I want to but fear lingers. What if I see the same vision again? After much hesitation, I decide to skip tonight's meditation. Tomorrow, I'll try with a fresh mind.
Exhausted, I fall asleep quickly.
This time, I'm not in darkness. I find myself in an endless, empty room no furniture, just open space. Anxiety pricks at me, but the room isn't threatening.
Then, golden sparkles flood the air, bathing the room in warmth. I look down at myself, my body glows with the same golden light. For the first time, I see myself radiant, beautiful, divine.
As I bask in the glow, a gentle whisper caresses my ear:
"You are safe here. Sleep without fear."
Peace washes over me. I sink into the golden warmth and drift into the deepest, most loving sleep.