The day I planned to propose was the day I was advised to give up on life.
Most of the time, I would like to know.
"If a magic wand were placed in your hands during your last minute, what would be your last wish?"
For many, life after death was... well—
That is why the belief that once there is life, there is hope is a saying that exists and is predominant among common minds.
In my opinion, I won't call it a false statement. But what if the different truth kept gnawing at our existence as human persons?
Don't blame my thoughts.
Who knows? There could be reasons behind them.
...
The bus moved steadily along the asphalt road, city views unfolding outside my window.
A bright sky, neon lights, and glass, along with construction sites and impressive buildings, filled me with anticipation.
The buildings reminded me that personality was not stable in this world.
But this was never my business, as far as today is concerned.
Today is the day my girlfriend promised to consider my proposal.
Today, I was on the road. On my way to meet my soon-to-be fiancé.
Safe to say, today could also be my first time enjoying the smoothness of her morph and her—
Hehe.
I suppose you now understand why I chose to sit at the back, adjacent to the closest window on my right, where I could easily locate Moclan Café, whether it was near our moving bus or far at the front.
My heart felt triumphant, beating with resonance and in a calculated, fast rhythm with each thought of how today should go.
I was simply overjoyed.
One of my dreams coming true had even made me so hasty that I pulled out the small, red box that housed the engagement ring and turned to the lady beside me.
"Excuse me, beautiful lady, can I see your left hand?"
She was reluctant. Any random girl would be.
But, I ignored the shock in her eyes and raised her left hand towards my face, just enough to make her palm and fingers stare at me.
Then, I raised the silver ring, which glistened in the sun's rays that pierced through the window. I inspected her finger and returned the ring to the red box.
"I knew it. It can only fit her," I muttered with a smile.
By now, many eyes were on me, forming their own impressions.
A few would think:
"Is he trying to propose to her on a bus?"
Some would think:
"He is probably losing nuts."
Many would think, even gossip:
"He is so rich!"
Hmm, let me not mention how this ring came about.
Earlier, I was in a hurry, and the bus had just pulled up at Moclan Café.
The speed and agility that coursed through my veins as I alighted from the bus would leave some with a change of impression.
"...or, he is going to propose today."
And they might be right.
Adjusting my neatly pressed black plain trousers and tugging the bottom of the white hoodie I had adorned as a simple attire, I walked briskly into the café.
With each step, my heart beat with heavy rhythms, screaming at both my impatience with what was facing me and a sudden creeping fear as to what the outcome of events might be.
But, I didn't want to let that bother me... not now.
I mean, she already made the promise, right?
Now, the case; it's been at least two hours since I arrived at this venue, and Sannu is yet to be seen.
'I will just wait for her all day. Maybe she wants to appear in the best way possible... just for me,' I blushed at this thought.
Why wouldn't she come?
Moclan Café was not a place meant only for the richest in town, nor is it a place for the wretched. Its existence blended these two personalities perfectly because of their best-selling point: Quality.
Their coffee, their ice-creams, all their products, when consumed, made anyone feel like they were in heaven.
I wanted Sannu to experience that, so I became one of the few poor citizens who could afford to stay here.
The small, red box was now heavy in my hands, so I carefully dropped it on the table beside the wall window where I sat, and looked across the table.
The glint of hope was shattered at my sight.
Sannu was yet to come.
Instead of the steady rhythm of anticipation mixed with optimistic fear, my heart beat became faster with immense anger suppressed by gradual depression.
It wasn't that I didn't arrive in time, but why isn't she here yet?
Disappointed, I ordered myself a hot cup of coffee and satisfied the hunger that had suddenly become evident.
After which, I dropped twenty bucks as payment for the coffee and left the café.
Outside, I was so furious that I acted in madness. I rushed the concrete pillar nearest to me and punched it twice.
All my nervous organs immediately became active.
I felt the pain.
But I didn't care.
"Goddamn, this is fucking 7 P.M.!"
...
Upon entering my one-room apartment, the dim glow from the screens of my two laptops, which rested on my affordable mattress, initially made me worry.
But then I remembered that I had just completed the levels of one of the games that had warped the human mindset. Obsession became the order of the day since the establishment of this game, and for me?
I was not left out.
This was my second year of consistently playing the game, and I became the first person to accomplish two things: breaking the record of finishing all 10,000 levels the game had, and realizing there was no reward for playing the game as promised.
Then, it hadn't mattered since I became hasty to meet Sannu.
But now, I laughed at my uselessness for having engaged with HAREM CULTIVATION.
By its side was the laptop, which I had used to try my last chance at Forex trading before I changed to another kind of job, in case it failed me again.
Pulling my hand from my trouser pockets, I realized another thing: I had forgotten the engagement ring in the café.
"My life savings!"
However, my body seemed relaxed and no longer worried. I didn't know what it could be. Besides, crossing paths in the street was more dangerous and unpredictable; unseen animals were believed to roam the area. Good thing I got back safe.
Was there actually something to worry about? Moclan Café was trustworthy. Tomorrow would be another day.
So, I went over and sat cross-legged on my mattress, staring at the two screens that were staring at me, and screamed.
I immediately picked up my smartphone from the bed, on my left, and entered my call log.
"What did I even plan to do?"
Then, I saw her name. Her caller ID. "SANNU".
I was planning to call her, but she had initiated the plan instead.
"Hi, Sunday Moahn?"
The moment she called me by my name, I knew something was off. So, I ignored and listened instead.
By then, the red pigments in my eyes, which had clarified my anger earlier, were fading, gradually being replaced by a knowing gaze.
Whatever Sannu wanted to say was beyond my guessing ability. But, I hope... I just hoped it would be a justifiable excuse, yet—
"Okay… let's be honest and straightforward. We've been together for five years, but what have you really achieved? Nothing."
"Your popular belief of being hopeful, shit... Hope is not really meant for everyone. You keep chasing fantasies — writing novels that don't sell, trades that always fail, and that stupid game you waste your life on. Is that what you call hope?"
My throat went utterly dry at hearing her words. They weren't what I expected to hear.
But what did she believe was right? Were her words true?
She continued. "I call it delusion. Do you even realize how pathetic you look? You're twenty-one, still living in a shoebox apartment, still struggling to buy me a coffee. Meanwhile, other men younger than you are driving cars, buying houses, and making real money. Even a nineteen-year-old boy is living the life you can't even dream of giving me."
And what connection does it have with me? I was really trying my best not to be affected by her words.
Well, I surprisingly cared less as my eyes widened at the two screens before me.
"Sunday Moahn? Give up!"
"Moahn..."
She called my name again. And I guess she was about to make another first move in what I vowed a girl would never be the first to do to me.
I interrupted her.
"You can as well, rot in hell for all I care!" My words came sharp, but calm as usual.
At that moment, it didn't matter how she felt or how painful making it happen was to me.
I ended the call.
"If she can't see the man I will become, then she will never deserve to," I resolved and returned my focus to the two screens before me.
CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE COMPLETED ALL 10,000 LEVELS OF HAREM CULTIVATION.
THE REWARD OF $1,000 FOR EACH LEVEL, ONLY PROMISED TO BE UNLOCKED UPON COMPLETION, HAS BEEN UNLOCKED!
$10,000,000 HAS BEEN WITHDRAWN TO YOUR ACCOUNT.
The moment I saw that, I was supposed to be very happy, but my eyes widened, this time in horror.
That amount of money, landing in my account, meant I would soon be going behind bars. But then—
DO YOU WISH TO WITHDRAW THE MONEY FROM YOUR GAME ACCOUNT?
< WITHDRAW | WITHHOLD >
Good enough, it was yet to be deposited into my National Bank Account.
So, for now, I averted my gaze to the screen, which I used for my Forex trading.
SHOUT OUT TO A SUCCESSFUL TRADE.
1,000 PIPS HIT!
PROFIT BALANCE: $1,000,000
< WITHDRAW | WITHHOLD >
Without wasting further of my time, I logged in to my virtual wallet, BIPASE WALLET ACCOUNT, and changed my temporary details, including my password, and clicked on withdraw from both screens.
Before then, I made sure to save a screenshot of the two jackpots. Once I confirmed the money was real and in my account, I saved the screenshot as well.
I don't know why I did this.
But I was certainly sure that Sannu must have gotten the message in her "WeChat" with the last word "Bitch!" staring at her.
Yet, the Harem Cultivation game popped up another notification.
DO YOU WISH TO ENTER A NEW PHASE?
< YES | NO >
Seeing the wonders it had done, I was left with no other choice but to click "Yes!".
And this was the right time, the usual strange kind of pain I felt in my head decided to reappear.
"Wooo!"
I clung to my head, struggling, knowing that the few times I experienced it, I barely survived.
The pain was usually sudden, intensely sharp, and comprehensively electric-shock-like. Even though its effect was brief, your survival will depend on its intensity.
Then, my eyes flickered, and in my blurred vision, I saw myself holding a stick, doing what I couldn't guess.
"If only this stick were a magic wand..."
I flicked the stick in the air several times and muttered in between last breaths.
"I... wish... all I have lost should come back to me."
That was when the full pain consumed me, my vision shattered.
And when I opened my eyes... the world was no longer earth.
...
...
...
I just heard a female voice.