My life sucks.
Shit and suck, that's the combination of my life.
While I was busy monologuing in my head about how much my life sucked, a brick from a construction site suddenly decided to drop straight onto my head.
And just like that… I died.
This was supposed to be how it ended.
But apparently, the unseen forces in the universe decided I had some "big role" to play, and my life shouldn't end like this, which is funny, because my only big role in life was being a professional disappointment.
So instead of letting me rest in peace, they dumped me into the Classroom of the Elite anime.
Now, the funny thing is, I only even got interested in Classroom of the Elite because I once stumbled across this one… "special" fanfic.
I found it on a night when I had absolutely nothing better to do, and man, it was unforgettable.
The story wasn't just about the MC being some second Ayanokouji, no, it was about him loving his loli sister.
And when I say "loving," I mean really loving her, in a way society would label as taboo, filthy, and all sorts of wrong.
It was the most unholy "Holy Scripture" I'd ever read.
Except instead of salvation, it gave me the kind of twisted satisfaction only degenerates like me can understand.
Funny thing is, I never even finished watching the actual anime.
Who would, when the fanfic was so much better? The anime was watered-down, censored, and far too tame for my taste.
I wanted an MC who banged every girl in the school without restraint or pixelation.
Sadly, that's not how the world worked.
But maybe… maybe that's why God threw me here.
Maybe He looked into my heart, saw the filth and frustration, and decided to grant my unholy wish.
God loves the world, after all… and maybe He loves perverts too.
And that's how my new life began as Honami Ichinose's brother.
I figured out where I'd landed pretty quick, thanks to her name and face.
Didn't mean I was some die-hard Honami fan or anything, though.
No… between her and Arisu Sakayanagi, I preferred Arisu.
Mostly because of another fanfic I was invested with, one where Arisu was the MC's sister. It was toxic, messed up, and absolutely beautiful.
That story shocked my young mind and corrupted my heart in the same beat.
And I couldn't get enough of it.
Unfortunately, barely anyone was willing to write something like that.
And out of the pitiful handful that existed, the one I loved the most was that exact same story I'd first come across.
That was the tragedy of my life.
I was starving for more chapters… and then reality decided to spit in my face.
The next thing I knew, my death came in the form of that falling brick.
My last thought?
I just want to see the ending of that story.
And then… a voice spoke in my head.
"Why don't you make your own story instead?"
And that's how I ended up being reborn into this world as Takashi Ichinose, the elder brother of Honami.
She was born not long after my mother gave birth to me, and then came our youngest sister.
My father, however, bailed not long after the moment he realized how much of a burden it was to actually raise us.
From then on, he was just a deadbeat father everyone hated and talked shit about.
I sank into depression at first. In my last life, I was born into a well-off family, never had to worry about food, money, or a roof over my head.
But now?
I got to taste exactly what being poor and broke really meant.
Luckily, I still retained all my talents from my past life.
My literary skill, my artistic ability, even my coding knowledge, they all came back with me.
I'd been a two-time game developer, a former artist in Vienna, and a writer who had left behind a variety of works in multiple fields.
Because of that, I crushed competitions. I won championship after championship in both writing and art.
I left my works scattered across websites, bookstores, and publishers, earning enough royalties and prize money to drag our family out of poverty and into a solid middle-class life.
That's why the whole "my sister stealing and earning a bad reputation as a thief" crap never happened in my life.
I made sure of it. I'm not like those brain-dead MCs in half the shitty webnovels I've read, the ones who just let canon play out and refuse to change anything, stumbling into one stupid plot mistake after another.
That kind of writing makes my blood boil so hard I've basically stopped trusting other people's works entirely.
Only a handful of authors are worth my time anymore.
And the worst part?
Some of those garbage stories have the audacity to slap the "genius" tag on their MC. For fuck's sake, just kill me already.
Thankfully, God granted my wish. Now, I get to write my own story in this world, by my own rules and standards.
No more suffering through idiotic main characters. No more putting up with half-assed, cringe-inducing plots.
From here on out, I'm in control.
Alright… probably not the best time to think about it when the smug little loli in front of me suddenly slammed the chessboard with both hands, sending the pieces scattering everywhere across the ground beneath us.
Black and white soldiers, rooks, and queens tumbled helplessly across the grass, no longer representing victory or defeat, because the result had already been violently overturned by the pissed-off loli glaring at me right now.
"Are you underestimating me, Takashi?" she snapped, her voice dripping with irritation.
"I don't, loli-chan," I replied casually. "It's just… it doesn't give me any real sense of accomplishment or fun whether I beat you or you beat me. Playing chess just kinda bores me, you know?"
She was loligaki. I'd met her through a social media account I made for fun, and she'd slid into my DMs, messaging me directly to chat.
According to her, she'd taken an interest in me because she was curious about the fact that someone around her age had already surpassed her in achievements.
She was still stuck in school, being called a genius by her family and classmates, while I was already operating on a much bigger stage, earning my own income, living my own life.
And I guess that stung her pride.
She narrowed her eyes at me, still not satisfied. "Then why even bother to play?"
"Because I've got way too much time to waste and I'm bored," I said bluntly.
With the royalty income constantly pouring into my bank account, I had more free time than I knew what to do with, and somehow, one of the things I ended up doing was sitting here in the park, playing chess with this angry little loli.
"Hmph! Ignoring you!" The loli huffed angrily and stood up, turning her back to me like she was done with the conversation.
I just shrugged and watched her stomp off. If she wanted to leave, I wasn't going to stop her.
But then she suddenly spun around to glare at me again, her face even redder this time. "Why aren't you chasing after me, Takashi?"
"Alright, alright… I'm chasing you. Happy?" I said with a smirk as I stood up and walked toward her.
I reached out and ruffled her lilac-colored hair, messing it up just to annoy her, which earned me a cute pout.
"Don't treat me like a kid… I..." Arisu started to say, but she was interrupted by a completely different voice.
"Brother, I already brought the ice creams!"
Before Arisu could finish her sentence, my little sister came running over, pink hair bouncing, three ice creams in her hands, and a big grin plastered on her face.
I wasn't sure if she'd timed her arrival on purpose or if it was pure coincidence, but either way, I couldn't help grinning back at her.
This was Honami, my younger sister.
We were in the park, enjoying one of our rare weekends together. Arisu had "coincidentally" run into us earlier, and somehow we'd ended up sitting down to play chess.
"Thanks, Honami," I said, patting her head as a reward.
She beamed at the praise before taking a big lick of her own ice cream.
"Fufufu… it seems my presence is no longer necessary, Takashi-kun," Arisu chuckled, though the little twitch at the corner of her mouth betrayed her annoyance.
Honami, either oblivious or just determined to be nice, offered one of the ice creams to her. "Here, for you too."
Arisu froze for a moment, her expression going blank. It was almost comical, she clearly hadn't expected my sister to just hand her an ice cream without a second thought.
Despite her cute appearance, I knew this loli had a dark heart.
She was the type who could smile sweetly while plotting a thousand ways to screw someone over.
Still, she accepted the ice cream, awkwardly muttering, "...Thanks."
And so, the three of us ended up sitting there in the park, licking our ice creams together in possibly the most awkward atmosphere imaginable.
None of us could figure out what to say, so we just sat there, letting the summer breeze carry the silence.
...
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