Fragmented rays of cyan light streak down the dorm hallway, as a pair of slow footsteps becomes louder and louder towards the end of the hallway. All of the doors of the corridor are closed shut, and the light stretches on the floor.
In the center of the hallway, Rohan walks, his hands in his pockets with his head down. He slowly walks towards the light, his eyes on the floor.
As he walks farther down the hallway, his body starts standing in front of the light, causing it to crawl up his body while leaving the space behind him dark. The farther he walks, the more light glues onto his body.
He walks up to the door with the ID 'A49F12,' and stops next to it, knowing exactly where it was without needing to look. He had to find the room so many times that he could find it more easily than he could find his own room.
The inside of the dorm room was dark, as the lights weren't on. The living room was cold and devoid of life, with the kitchen equipment ice cold.
Three knocks come from the door, and after that, the room returns to silence.
Maria's bedroom was also cold with the lights off, her old clothing piled on the floor like it always is before Erica would clean it up. However it stays on the floor, not having been taken care of.
Out of the window, the Supersun sets, giving a beautiful bright cyan sunset.
On the bed, Erica lays on her back, wearing pajamas like she usually would in her room.
Erica stares at the ceiling with half opened dull eyes, seeming to be extremely tired, almost not awake at all. A ping sounds from her Connect, and it projects a small holographic screen of a message from someone named 'Luv,' and the message reads 'Hey Erica, are you in your dorm? Sorry if I came at a bad time.'
Rohan waits in front of the door, staring ahead, waiting for it to open. He wears his casual clothing, with his black sleek blazer jacket and dark blue pants on.
The door finally is dematerialized open into a nanite cloud, and on the other side is Erica, who wears her night clothing, with her soft white shirt and green shorts on.
The two stare at one another for a few moments in silence, their eyes dull, as the awkward yet cute energy they used to have wasn't present in the moment.
The door materializes shut, and Rohan walks into the living room, looking at the sofas. He then looks at Erica, who walks towards the wall, seeming to be waiting for him to make a move.
Rohan lets out a soft sigh, and he asks, "So uh...do you have any homework you need help on? Or like...any work you need help on?"
Erica stops in front of the wall, and turns around to face Rohan. She then leans back against the wall, and stares up at him. She answers "No, I'm all caught up with everything."
Rohan nods his head, and he walks further into the room. He looks at the mini kitchen, and then asks "Are you hungry? We should cook something together again, I know I nearly blew up the room several times, but it could be fun."
Erica answers dully, "I'm not hungry."
Rohan nods his head again, and he looks around the room, trying to find something else to bring up. His eyes go from the sofa to the hallway, unable to brainstorm an activity for them to do.
Erica speaks first, her voice weak, "Could we maybe just cuddle actually?"
Rohan blinks twice, and he looks up at Erica. He nods his head, and smiles softly, answering "Sure, we could."
They had cuddled a good amount of times in the past, usually doing it after everything else as a cooldown activity before parting ways. While it was unusual to go straight to resting, Rohan couldn't offer any other idea, and it was relieving to hear her show that she wanted to do something.
Erica gets off the wall, and she walks into the hallway, and to the bedroom. Rohan follows her after, and begins slipping his jacket off.
Rohan enters the bedroom after Erica, his jacket in his hand, and he looks around to find a place to drop it. He notices the pile of clothing, knowing that if things were normal, they wouldn't be there. He walks to the desk and lets the jacket rest on the chair.
Erica crawls onto the bed, and lays down, waiting for Rohan to join her. Rohan walks to the bed as well, and throws himself over it. He turns to Erica, and extends his right hand out, offering Erica to roll towards him.
Erica does so, rolling to his side, and placing her head on his side, and putting her hands together. She clings herself to Rohan, and lets out a soft sigh of relief, as she had been craving warmth.
Rohan keeps his eyes on the ceiling, staring silently, while Erica stares at the door in silence. The two stay in place for a few moments, contemplating to themselves.
The supersun slowly descends into the horizon, its light shining into the otherwise dark bedroom, unable to reach the bed. Rohan and Erica lie on the bed together, with the bed surrounded by the pile of the old roommate's clothing.
Rohan breathes slowly, his chest slowly raising before slowly descending. His mind was both overloaded and blank, as he was still thinking about his recent revelation, yet he couldn't think of what to talk about.
Erica speaks first, her voice soft and soothing, "How did you enjoy your break?"
Rohan lets out a soft breath, and he answers, "It was fine, I was mostly studying."
Erica responds, "Oh, I kind of hoped we could do something. You know, we could've left campus. Or even spent time in it, I wouldn't have really cared."
Rohan sighs, and he says, "I'm sorry, I know. I hope I didn't make you feel…."
However, he goes silent, unable to finish his sentence.
Erica finishes it for him: "A bit. I guess I understood that you wanted time to process things on your own as well...but I would be lying if I said having you with me through it wouldn't have hurted. I know you might've not known Maria as well...but she was really my only friend. Sure, I might've slaved for her, but she would pay back by showing care and warmth. We'd talk and joke, and when people were trying to do things to me, she always stepped in and took care of them. Honestly, I never understood why people would prey on me, but regardless, she kept me protected, and kept me strong. Honestly, I feel bad sleeping on her bed. It's like I'm taking advantage of her not being here anymore. But sleeping here is the only way I can feel...connected to her...in some way."
Rohan frowns, and he says, "I-...I'm sorry…. I didn't know her a fraction of how well you knew her...but I still owe my life to her...if she hadn't helped me up in the building, I would've definitely been crushed. I don't know if her taking the time to help me up was a reason for her death...maybe if she hadn't bothered getting me, she'd still be alive. And you're not taking advantage in any way, don't worry. It sounded like she loved you, and even though sometimes I was worried that you were being overworked for too little pay, I can tell you loved her too."
Erica says, "Well, she was like an older sister to me. No matter how much she might've bullied me, we were always there for each other. And don't make it out like you're the reason she...you know. She made a bold choice, and got unlucky."
Rohan responds, "Still, I don't know. Before that day, I didn't even know what an Exhuman was. I didn't know my own home. I always believed anything bad that happened had good reason to be there...all creatures regardless of how vicious and dangerous played a part in their kingdom, there was a good and a bad to everything. But...I can't make sense of this...I don't understand what good comes out of it. It's just senseless destruction...and nobody can do anything about it."
Erica sighs, and she agrees "Yeah, the world is cruel. I thought as long as I worked my best to make everyone happy, the world would be happy, and so I thought as long as I worked there would never be a problem. But I don't control everything. We can only do so much."
Rohan adds, "We're still ants in this world. Regardless of how massive our cities are, how advanced our technology is, we're still ants, and we could get squashed on by titans we don't understand, everything we have they can take. No matter how much I try to learn, I can't find a solution."
Erica burrows her head into Rohan's side and shakes it before saying "As smart as you are, none of us are god."
Rohan sighs, and he says with a hint of annoyance, "I don't want to be above all, or I'd just add to the issue. I just want...somehow...to make it fair for everyone. How are we supposed to claim we are free when we can lose everything we built to beings who can choose to demolish us in an instant?"
Erica answers, "All we can do is the best we can give. I don't ask from you to be some raging all powerful god and slay all the evil in the world. I know it hurts that we live in a world with this chaos, but if we only fix ourselves on that, we'll never be happy. All I wanted you to do...was to let me cling to you like this. Maybe it's selfish to say I'd rather you give me special treatment rather than strive to change the world, but every day during break I just wondered if you'd ever bother coming here. I just wanted to be reminded that I didn't lose the only person that loved me…."
Rohan frowns, and he turns to Erica. He tenderly rubs her head to comfort her, realizing that he had effectively abandoned her without meaning to. He apologizes, "I'm sorry...I should've come here earlier...I just...I don't know...I was caught up with everything else going on. I guess I've been so used to keeping up with the world that when I learned that there was so much I didn't know, I couldn't think of anything else but learning what it was that I didn't know. Maybe I'm not really an expert lover...I've never had someone before...and my goals were always centered on me trying to make myself the best I could."
Erica wraps her arm over Rohan, and she pulls herself over him, laying her head over his heart. She lays on him, hearing his heartbeat with her ear pressed against his chest.
She responds, "Well, sometimes to be the best you can, you have to be the best for the people you have."
Rohan lays his hand over Erica's head, and he says, "I guess that's true...if I'm not helping anyone...then I guess I have nothing to show for what I can do. If we live to strengthen the people and world around us, we have to be there for that world. I don't know...I'll try to be there for you when I can...but don't restrict yourself to only having me as someone to go to. You're popular due to how much you help others, you should build on some of those connections. You'd have many friends if you credited yourself more. Honestly, you're better at making the world better than I am. If only I just...had some way to protect them...a way to balance the chaos…."
As Rohan speaks off of wish, he suddenly begins hearing voices again and getting flashes of memories, which stabilizes to give him a clear image.
He is inside a bedroom of sorts, with a blue wall, and soft yellow glow coming from the lights. He is tucked in a bed, seeming to be ready to go to sleep, as the window across from his bed indicates that it was nighttime.
As he lays in bed, the door of the bedroom dissolves open, and a man with a white blazer enters the room. The man notices Rohan, and he approaches him, his face somehow hard to recognize, as the memory was too unclear to get a proper image of the face.
The man stands over Rohan, and he places his hand on Rohan's forehead for a few moments. He then says, "Okay, goodnight Meditat. I'll see you in the morning."
As the man turns around to walk away however, Rohan finds himself asking a question with a young voice, "Wait, dad?"
The man stops and turns back to face Rohan before asking, "What is it?"
Rohan asks, "What will I have to do when I grow up?"
The man sighs, and he walks back towards Rohan. He then bends down to meet Rohan face to face, and he says, "Well, son, that is a question I cannot answer for you. Now, do I have dreams of what I want you to become, and nightmares of what I don't want of you? Yes, at least from what I've learned, every father wants something out of their child. But it would be selfish of me to force my beliefs and missions upon you, so in the end, you are the one who judges what you make of your destiny. You could either become an unruly tyrant or a gentle protector, I won't be the one to make that decision. I have given you a few tools to help you, and I have tried to raise you the best I can, but I know I have not been perfect in my teachings, and you will still need to work hard to do anything, even the bare minimum won't be granted to you. We will be in a world where paradise is not granted, and even the freedom to survive will not come so easily. Even for someone like you, you will be challenged, and you will have to slave to do what you will. As painful as it is to say to a child like you, the powerful tools I've given you only make the work you will need to do with them even more difficult and draining. But if you put your time and energy into your goals, I am sure you can succeed. So I have a question for you, Meditat, what is it that you want to succeed at?"
Rohan answers confusedly, "I don't know, I thought you would tell me."
The man smiles, and he says, "It may seem harder trying to choose your life for yourself, but when you are free, you will feel the lightest yet strongest ever. Whatever you do, be confident that you are doing the right thing. Sometimes, to be selfless and save others, you need to selfishly steer the ship yourself. But don't let that corruptible power scare you into self submission. You control yourself, and I know with a mind like yours, you will control yourself to do the right thing. Even if I don't know what that is."
A woman yells from another room, "Come on, how am I ready before you?!"
The man chuckles, and he says, "It seems like your mother is calling me down. Goodnight, Meditat. Sleep well, and remember, you will be a good Viatorem as long as you do what you know is best. And that means going to bed on time too."
The man then leaves the room, and as he does, the room becomes dark, and the memory comes to an end.
Erica's eyebrow raises after Rohan goes silent. She lifts her head and looks at Rohan, asking "Uh, hello? Row?"
Rohan blinks twice, and he lowers his head to see Erica. He smiles softly, and says, "Sorry, what was I saying?"
Erica sighs, and she drops her chin on Rohan's chest before answering, "You were going off again about wanting to do something, protecting or whatever. And I think you overcredit me a bit. I know how to help people run their clubs, but I'm not going to save the universe from war. You're smart too, smarter than me, I just know how to help. I mean, for one, if you really want to help the world, maybe actually think about...you know...helping. You keep going on about protecting from the terrorists and everything, but you're not a superhero, and either way just beating up some people who did bad won't make everything good. If you chase the bad guys, you'll leave the good guys behind. It feels like that's what's happening, anyways."
Rohan frowns and sighs before looking up at the ceiling. He then says, "I'm sorry it looks that way, I don't know what else to say to make my case. I guess maybe it has to do with how I might've not exactly lost someone dear to me to trigger grief, but after everything happened, all I can feel is...I don't know the word...I just want to go out there and…."
Erica answers, "Belligerent? Heh, is that the first time you couldn't think of a word? It's ironic because I got that from you."
Rohan sighs, and he says, "I don't want to fight, I just want to make sure nobody else gets hurt."
Erica frowns, and she softly says, "Yeah...by fighting the people hurting them."
Rohan stares at the ceiling, his face seeming to have lost some of the joy it obtained during the conversation. He stays silent, unable to find something to say back.
Erica stares at Rohan, her face also seeming to have relapsed to its depressed state.
They were able to comfort each other and find some light in the conversation, however it had also concluded to a mutual understanding, one that they both felt uneasy about.
Rohan had been exposed to the truth, and now, he had changed from the naive optimistic boy only focused on getting the best test results. He had seen, and he had been captivated.
He had changed forever, and could never revert to the bliss that once made him endearing.
He couldn't lie to himself that the world wasn't as beautiful as what he hoped to experience when he'd graduate.