Jeffbob and Ziriothrax appeared among a sparse spattering of trees seemingly in the middle of nowhere.
'Those cultists...perhaps I had underestimated them. Though they had not offered a sacrifice of immense power, their request for the Second Exchange...'
He laughed gleefully with a manic glint in his eyes.
"MMMMM"
"MMM MMMMMMM"
Muffled noises sounding from below them interrupted Ziriothrax's scheming. Jeffbob shifted one of his hoofs and two breathless voices gasped out in relief.
"Damn man, you gotta watch where you're stepping!", Stave exclaimed.
"Yeah man, rude!", Dave agreed emphatically.
Ziriothrax, having hopped down from his temporary spot on Jeffbob's back, replied warily.
"It seems we've got ourselves some little ones here"
"Now, now", Jeffbob's deep voice broke through. "Don't frighten them, cricket. Look, they've only just ascended."
Ziriothrax leaned closer, realisation dawning on his insect carapace as his tense posture relaxed. It must be noted that The Dread Ziriothrax, Devourer of a Billion Souls, Origin of All Evil, Archon of Suffering, King in Crimson Cloth, He Who Lurks In The Dark, The Lord Below was not necessarily 'afraid'. His tension was more of a precautionary measure.
After all, his status had afforded him insight into many secrets of cosmic nature. One of them regarded the nature of the beings who occupied the spot at the pinnacle of the Dao of Blades. I am referring, of course, to grass. After all, they're not called 'blades of grass' for no reason.
Unfortunately, very few of them ever gain sentience - its just not really in their nature, not that they are unable - and fewer still pursue martial traditions. This is not because they are peaceful, or lazy or anything else.
More practically, it is because they lack both hands and feet.
Anyways, Ziriothrax's worries assuaged for the moment, Stave and Dave took this moment to speak up.
"So what we just ascended", Stave replied with bluster. "I'll have you know we both have names and even almost meaning"
Ziriothrax scoffed but was silenced by a glance from Jeffbob's lifeless black orbs.
"Well then, little ones. Let us wallow in suspense no longer. Regale us of your names and grant us the honour of using them!"
"Well", Stave blushed at the attention, squirming like an embarrassed child. Which, to an extent, he was. Except he was a blade of grass not a child and wasn't squirming at all because he lacked the necessary musculoskeletal structures.
"I'm called Stave", he puffed out his chest (?).
"And I'm Dave", Dave spoke up. "Nice to meet you", he added after a brief hesitation, not willing to be outdone.
'Well', Jeffbob thought, 'we can cut him some slack. After all, this was his first conversation. I've had-'
His brows furrowed, 'actually I don't remember.' A stressed look appeared on his equine face before being eased by his realisation.
'Oh yeah, I don't have any memories in my head that's why.'
During the several minutes these thoughts took to coalesce from the treacle that was Jeffbob's thinking process, Ziriothrax had turned his gaze towards Stave and Dave, who felt a shiver run down their non-existent spines.
"Well then", Ziriothrax spoke malevolently. "How about you two give me a reason to spare you where you stand. The big guy isn't gonna save you now".
He chortled at their obvious glance towards Jeffbob who, at the current moment, had his mouth lolled open, saliva drooling out.
"W-well, I'm sure we can come to some kind of arrangement. Isn't that right Dave", Stave stuttered.
"Y-yeah, you're- you're right Stave. I mean, we've got a whole host of things we could tell you.", Dave jumped in at Stave's panicked glance. "What about that time we almost figured out the meaning of life?"
"Yeah, yeah", Stave grasped desperately at the slowly slipping straws. "Wow, yeah almost forgot about that one huh." He laughed nervously. "Meaning, eh?"
Ziriothrax laughed derisively.
"Pitiful grasslings, I can smell your lie. Meaning still eludes your weak grip."
Stave and Dave flinched under Ziriothrax's onslaught, the words burrowing deep within their vulnerable minds.
"Besides, the moment sentience cursed me with its malicious grasp I had understood my meaning with more certainty than the strength of steel. My purpose is my meaning, I have no need of anything else".
Stave and Dave quivered under Ziriothrax's fiery gaze, but were luckily spared further mental desolation as the tree behind them creaked its boughs. It rumbled out in a voice made up of a thousand rustling leaves.
"Purpose, you have not-so-little cricket. Even glimpsing the spark within you threatens to burn my body like dry tinder. What dreadful purpose propels you I know not. I dare not lecture you, for by virtue of strength you are above me. I dare not lecture you, for by virtue of knowledge you are above me. Only with the possibility of another's perspective, I dare to engage you."
Ziriothrax was silent for the first time, stormy eyes fixed upwards at the trunk of the tree whose crown towered above him so hatefully, blocking out the sky.
"So, not-so-little cricket", the tree continued. "What say you to me? My roots have grown in these lands for a hundred years. Surely, of this place at least, my perspective may be more helpful? I only ask that you spare these little ones your wrath. They are innocent of all this".
Ziriothrax growled, "Innocence is Creation's Lie". But he reigned in his wrath and let loose a breath. "But I shall hear you out".
'Destroying them as I so fervently wish to may get me on the bad side of this Trinacornagon. Who knows when he'll awaken from his catatonic state. He is crucial to my plans, I cannot remember why exactly...but my instinct is never wrong. Plans within plans, minds within minds. This is my way, not brute force. Just as an ant may move a boulder with a lever, I shall the Fulcrum Against Fate.'
"Phew wee", Stave let out a breathless chuckle. "Really thought we were done for there, eh Dave?"
"Oh man that was something I'll give you that much. 'Purpose is steel' oh man I am definitely using that"
"Aww man I always end up with the left overs, it's not fair"
"Well you snooze you lose as they say", Dave chortled. "Hmm, that saying...I've never heard of it before. Maybe..."
Recognising the signs of an impending lecture, Stave quickly spoke up to interrupt his friend.
"Yeah, yeah whatever. I'll think of something cool without plagiarising it like you"
Ziriothrax drowned out their incessant chattering, focusing on the towering tree before him. Its hateful branches blotting out the sun only served as a reminder that his goal was as far out of reach as the clouds.
'Soon', he promised himself. He glanced at Jeffbob subconsciously, though his conscious mind did not even know this action. Plans within plans, and minds within minds.
No being before or since could ever compare to the ambition of this little cricket. To fool the Oblivion Seal with such artistry and then to use its shroud as his own? Such arrogance truly foreshadowed his ascent into the ranks of those above.
But no plans are infallible and chaos is almost as immutable a Law as the Brown.
And, of course, at the end of the day...he's...just...a cricket.