I did not see Ichika after I was free from the flu. It had been five long years since that encounter in the park, and time had transformed me, sculpting me into a different person. The memory of Ichika's kindness no longer had the same hold over my consciousness. It had blurred, softened by the gradual drift of time, yet still, it lingered like a ghost in the back of my mind.
Now, I was standing on the platform for my first day of high school, gripping the strap of my bag. Student ID Number 197.
The platform was suffocating. Groups of first-years were already laughing, falling into easy conversations, their uniforms crisp and new. I kept my eyes glued to the scuff marks on my shoes, letting the noise wash over me. High school was supposed to be a fresh chapter. But as I stood there, invisible in the crowd, the familiar, heavy isolation settled in my chest.
I already knew how today would go. I'd sit in class alone. I'd eat alone. There were no fresh starts for people like me. Nothing was going to change.
Suddenly, I felt someone bump into me.
"Oh, S-Sorry," I said, and then my eyes met the girl's.'
Her eyes were so beautiful.
"K-K-Kenji??"
The familiar, hesitant voice called out my name, breaking through my early morning daze. I blinked, momentarily disoriented by the unexpected sound. Did she just call me by my given name? In all honesty, I wasn't accustomed to being addressed outside of the familiar walls of my home.
"Eh?" I muttered, my voice still heavy with sleep. Rubbing my eyes, and then as if emerging from a distant memory, I recognized her.
Ichika.
"I-Ichika?" I stammered, completely frozen.
The bustling train station suddenly felt entirely silent. It had been five years, and she was taller now, her long black hair catching the morning sun.
But there was no mistaking the gentle curve of her face or the bright, familiar blue of her eyes. She was still here. I opened my mouth, but the words got stuck in my throat. I didn't know whether to smile or run away.
The train, as if on cue, arrived with a rush of air that tousled Ichika's hair, making it flow gracefully in the wind. The train came to a stop before us, its doors sliding open to welcome a new wave of passengers.
With a silent understanding, we both stepped onto the train, finding seats next to each other. After all, it had been five years, and despite any lingering unease or unresolved feelings, we were no longer the children we once were.
The train rumbled on its tracks, carrying us closer to our destination. As the initial shock of our unexpected reunion began to settle, my mind raced with questions.
As the initial shock of our unexpected reunion began to settle, my mind raced. The realization hit me all at once: Was Ichika heading to the same high school as me?
I mustered the courage to break the silence that had settled between us. "Hey, um... Ichika?" I began, my voice uncertain.
Ichika turned to me, her blue eyes meeting mine. "Y-yes?" She replied, her voice still carrying the softness that I remembered from our childhood.
My heart raced as I ventured further. "Are you going to the same high school as me?"
The question hung in the air, laden with implications and unspoken sentiments. The train continued its steady journey, the rhythmic clattering of wheels against tracks providing a backdrop to our conversation. I couldn't help but search Ichika's eyes for clues, trying to decipher her thoughts and emotions.
Ichika's gaze held a mixture of surprise and realization as my question hung in the air. It seemed that she hadn't expected our paths to cross again in this manner. She paused for a moment, her thoughts racing, before finally answering.
"You're going to Yume No High School too?" she replied softly, her voice tinged with a hint of uncertainty.
My chest loosened, a sudden, overwhelming sense of relief washing over me. Out of all the schools in the city, we were heading to the exact same place."O-Oh, so we are..." I said shyly.
As I contemplated the implications of our shared destination, Ichika continued to speak, her voice carrying a sense of warmth and nostalgia. "I never imagined we'd end up at the same high school, Kenji. It's been so long since we last saw each other."
"Yeah," I agreed, my voice soft but filled with genuine warmth.
The train journeyed on, and the scenery outside transformed as we neared our destination. We sat in silence for a while, lost in our thoughts, the unspoken promise of rekindling our friendship hanging between us like a delicate thread.
But there was something else that needed to be addressed, an apology that weighed on my mind. Finally, I mustered the courage to apologize, "Ichika, I-I, I'm so sorry..."
"About what..? What's going on?"
"I-I it was not my fault, I wanted to meet you at the park b-b-but I had the flu and I couldn't move and I-"
I felt a hand on my shoulder, stopping me from saying another word. Ichika looked at me with a smile and a soft expression, with a mixture of understanding.
"Kenji, relax. I'm not mad at you, I was thinking you didn't want to be my friend, but it doesn't matter anymore, does it?" Ichika said with a soft and warm voice.
"Ichika," I whispered, voice cracking, "did you... wait for me at the park?"
She nodded, just once. "Yeah. Not every day... but I passed by. A lot. Just in case."
"Why would you do that..."
"Well, you can't just hurt someone and not make up to it, can you?"
My throat tightened. The guilt hit me like a punch to the chest.
After the flu, I avoided the park. I couldn't do it, I couldn't talk to her, I didn't want her to confront me back then, and I hate myself for not going there.
I looked at the same Ichika from five years ago, the girl I had promised to meet when I was ten.
Was it just nervousness that made me feel this way? I was nervous. Not only was I someone who had a hard time talking to people in general, but the girl I hadn't seen in five years was now sitting right next to me. Yeah, I was allowed to be nervous.
"I-Ichika," I stammered, staring down at my lap.
She turned toward me, her blue eyes curious. "Uh, yeah?"
"Do you... um..." I swallowed hard, pulling my phone from my pocket. My hands were actually shaking.
"D-Do you have a phone now?"Her eyes widened slightly before a familiar, bright smile broke across her face.
"I do! Wait, let me get it."
She rummaged in her bag for a second before pulling it out and handing it to me.
I took it, my fingers fumbling slightly as I pressed the side button. The screen lit up, asking for a password.
"Oh, wait," I muttered, handing it back.
"Oops, let me unlock it," she said, leaning in. She pressed her thumb to the sensor. I couldn't help but notice her pink nails, a small detail, but somehow, it caught my attention, a reminder that we weren't ten years old anymore.
"Thank you," I said as the home screen appeared.
I glanced at her home screen briefly, she had the usual apps like social media, calculator, and camera. But I didn't want to pry too much, lest she snatch her phone back from me. She watched me intently, clearly curious about what I was doing on her phone.
I opened her phone's contacts app. "What are you doing?" she asked, her voice tinged with uncertainty.
"I'm... just putting my number in here," I replied.
With my number entered, I needed to decide how to label my contact. "How should I label it?" I pondered aloud.
"By your name, maybe?" she suggested.
I settled for simply typing my name on her phone: 'K,e,n,j, i..' "Here," I said as I handed her phone back.
"Thank you for stealing my phone!" she quipped with a grin.
She was joking, but the fact that I had just put my phone number in a girl's phone left me a bit surprised. I hadn't thought I was capable of doing that. I wouldn't have done it with anyone else. Why was I so comfortable, yet so uncomfortable, with her?
She did the same with my phone, marking her number in it. It was my first time getting a phone number from someone my age, and I hadn't expected it to be from a girl.
"Is the train going slower than usual?" I asked, suddenly desperate to change the subject before my face caught fire.
Ichika chuckled, leaning slightly toward the window. "We're pulling into the station, dummy."
I looked out the glass. The platform of Yume No High School was coming into view, students already flooding toward the exit.
I gripped the handle of my bag. My stomach was still doing flips, but as I looked over at Ichika putting her phone away, for the first time all morning...
I didn't feel like I was walking into a nightmare.