Yamada Chuichiro.Fifty years old. Registered in Konoha's records twenty years ago. Lives alone, chops wood for a living. No family.
That was the entirety of the mission file Jiraiya unrolled for them.
The three of them — Jiraiya, Minato, Kushina, and Jinzō — crouched in the trees, watching the shabby clay house where the supposed spy lived. The man hadn't come home yet. His place had already been searched, but nothing had turned up.
"Wouldn't it be easier to just drag a Hyūga out here?" Kushina muttered from her branch. "One peek with the Byakugan, boom. Spy confirmed. Why are we wasting time hiding in trees?"
Typical Kushina. Punch first, paperwork never.
"The guy could just say he's a wandering shinobi," Jinzō shot back. "You think Konoha hasn't thought of that excuse before?"
Konoha's whole system for letting outsiders settle had been designed to weed out spies. Nine years of background checks, payments, and surveillance before someone was treated like a real villager. If you slipped through all that, you were either clean… or a professional.
Kushina huffed and turned away. "As if you know everything."
Jiraiya, unfazed, raised an eyebrow. "So, Jinzō, got a brilliant plan?"
Jinzō rubbed his chin like he was seriously thinking. "Yeah. Beat the crap out of him. If he confesses, great. If he doesn't, keep beating until he does. Either way, mystery solved."
Jiraiya: "..."Minato: "..."Kushina: "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!"
"What, evidence? We're shinobi, not bureaucrats," Jinzō replied, rolling his eyes. "If you want court testimony, you're in the wrong profession."
Kushina nearly exploded, but Jiraiya cut in before she actually set the tree on fire. "Quiet down. He's coming."
They spotted him at last: a gray-haired old man trudging home with a bundle of firewood. Yamada Chuichiro.
Minato and Kushina peeled off to ask around the neighborhood, leaving Jiraiya and Jinzō to shadow him. They perched on the roof and bored a small hole, peeking in. The man cooked, ate, washed up, and lay down. Nothing suspicious.
Hours later, the four regrouped.
"The neighbors love him," Minato reported. "Calls him a kind old man, always helping out. Someone even conned him out of money recently."
"See?" Kushina argued. "He's just some unlucky geezer. Not a spy."
Her sympathy earned a sharp look from Jiraiya. "Rule one: shinobi don't let emotions cloud judgment."
Jinzō snorted. "Cut her some slack. We've been competing for dead-last on written exams. How's she supposed to know the rules?"
Kushina's hair literally floated with rage. "I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
Minato barely restrained her. Jinzō, of course, looked bored.
"But seriously," Jinzō continued, flipping through the mission file, "this guy screams spy template. Lonely old man? No close ties? This is the kind of profile they recycle in every bad spy movie."
Jiraiya rewarded his sarcasm with a knuckle to the head. Or tried to. His fist struck metal — Jinzō had slipped a tiny nail plate under his hair.
"Been waiting for that one, sensei," Jinzō said smugly.
Jiraiya cradled his bruised hand, looking ready to cry. His own student had booby-trapped his head.
"Kid, you're a menace."
"Next time I'll add poison," Jinzō muttered.
Everyone else: Hisssss.
Then Jiraiya stiffened. "Quiet. Look."
From Yamada's house, a shadow bolted into the night — moving too fast for any woodcutter.
"Confirmed," Jiraiya said. "Spy."
And then, like the worst liar ever, he added, "I'll leave this one to you three. I'll… go alert backup."
Jinzō stared flatly. Seriously? You could have one-shotted him before he left the porch.
But Kushina already had stars in her eyes. "Got it! Leave it to us!"
No choice. They took off after the target. Jiraiya's form poofed away in a puff of smoke.
The three Genin pushed their Shunshin as hard as they could, weaving through the trees. Chuichiro suddenly stopped in a clearing.
They spread out, cautious.
Then his head tilted back unnaturally far, grinning wide. "Found you."
Explosions ripped through their hiding spots. But they reappeared instantly, surrounding him.
"Wait—when did he notice us?" Kushina whispered.
"He noticed you the second you fell out of that tree, genius," the old man snapped back. "What kind of shinobi are this loud?!"
Kushina flushed, then scowled and drew her kunai. Doesn't matter. He's a spy. He dies.
The old man sighed. "Your face is basically a thought bubble. I can see you deciding to kill me."
Before she could charge, Jinzō signaled something subtle. Minato and Kushina straightened, pretending to be ready.
"Retreat!" Jinzō barked.
They vanished instantly.
The old man smirked. "Too late."
Figures erupted from the ground all around them — an ambush.
And the real target was obvious.
"They're here for Kushina!"