I remember it well... It was a Monday morning, and I was almost late. I ran until I was out of breath, finally stopping to rest right outside the classroom door.
And who was it... standing casually next to me with his school bag slung over his shoulder?
Ethan.
"Almost late, huh?"
That deep voice made me look up, confused. I knew him as the hottest guy in our class, but I never expected him to talk to me.
"Yeah... almost," I replied curtly before quickly walking to my seat. My heart was pounding, but not from the running. It was because of the way Ethan had looked at me with that slight smile.
After that day, we started talking more often. Sometimes it was about homework, other times just small talk about school. There was one time I forgot a pen, and he handed one to me without saying a word. And during class, I truly felt him looking at me often... so often that I could actually feel it.
I didn't know if it was real or just my imagination, but at the time, my heart was starting to change.
Until... our classmates started teasing us.
"Ariana! Why does Ethan talk to you so much?"
"Are you guys secretly dating?"
I'd laugh it off at first, but the more they teased, the more uncomfortable I felt. And it seemed like Ethan sensed the change in the atmosphere too. We talked less... we greeted each other less. The eye contact that once made my heart race was replaced with him looking right through me, as if we were strangers.
Not long after, the news that Ethan had a girlfriend reached me.
My heart... felt as if it were being gently squeezed. It wasn't a deep love or anything like that, but it hurt enough to make me silent all day. I tried to tell myself that he was never mine to begin with. But for some reason, it still felt like I was losing something.
Then one day, he broke up with his girlfriend. It had only been a few weeks. The hope I had tried so hard to extinguish was lit once again.
That's when I decided to confess to him that I liked him.
But what I got back... was silence. So silent it was as if nothing had ever happened. And in that moment, I knew that if I wanted him to look at me, I had to change myself.