Chapter 15 – Choice
Emilia stepped back in shock. "It's you," she whispered as dread overtook her voice. "You and Pandora destroyed my home!"
For a moment, Regulus's attention turned towards Emilia. "How do you know Lady Pandora? A spineless, gutless, brainless child such as yourself cannot know that name! That is a right only the highest of the high may attain, and –"
"You just love to hear yourself talk, don't you?" said Subaru, stepping forward with his head held high.
"How dare –"
"You know, a few minutes ago, I was planning on running away," he said flippantly. "Then, I remembered how your voice makes me want to punch your face in."
"You insolent –"
"Son of a –"
"I will –"
"Your mother –"
"Stop interrupting –"
"El Minya!"
Forty flaming spears of shadow shot towards Regulus, but he didn't bother dodging.
After all, there's no point evading an attack if you're invincible.
"H-how?" Rem managed to ask.
"It's called 'Stillness of an Object's Time,'" answered Subaru. "He's completely invulnerable."
Regulus killed his wives, meaning he discovered that Lion's Heart wasn't working. Surely, that would mean that his invincibility was gone.
Except it wasn't.
"Then how do you beat him, I wonder?" The air in front of them shifted and Beatrice conjured another shield. Subaru could tell that she was struggling under the weight of Regulus's assault.
"You can't," he said flatly.
"But –"
"He's right," confirmed Emilia. Her gaze was steely as she glared resolutely at her foe. "But that doesn't mean we're going to back down, are we?"
Despite everything, Subaru grinned. "When you put it like that, how can I do anything but push forward?"
Rem readied her flail with a manic gleam in her eyes as her horn glowed on her forehead. "I'm always prepared to kill a Witch Cultist."
He suppressed a shiver. "Rem, have I ever told you that you're kinda scary?"
"Many times."
He turned to Beatrice. "I'm thinking Cor Leonis, Second Shift. What do you say?"
Her perpetual frown deepened. "So, we're going to stand aside and let the others fight, I wonder?"
"Well, it's not like you have much mana leftover from that new spell we made yesterday," he pointed out as she flinched. It was a blow to her pride, he knew that, but he couldn't risk her getting hurt. "You know how much I hate asking you to share my burden."
She visibly deflated, saying, "Which is how I know that this is our only option, I suppose."
"Glad we're on the same page." He faced Emilia and Rem, who were looking at him expectantly. "All right, just like we've been practicing. Commence Operation Rigel, Formation Six."
Rem gripped her flail tighter. "I can't wait. On your mark."
He nodded. "Three… two… one… now!" he shouted.
Beatrice dropped her shield as Subaru activated Cor Leonis, Second Shift. Rem whipped her flail in a wide arc as it flew behind Regulus, wrapping back around him multiple times. The ground around Regulus erupted, knocking Rem's attack off course.
"This is rude! Disrespectful! I am simply trying to take back what was stolen from me, and I am being attacked! My rights are –"
"Al Huma!" A thirty-foot-long spear of ice courtesy of Emilia rammed right into Regulus's face, but all it did was make him angrier.
"Emilia!" Subaru called out. "Less power, continuous strikes! We need to keep him occupied!"
"Got it!" she yelled back. "El Huma! El Huma! El Huma!"
Emilia cast unrelenting ice spears at Regulus while Rem continued attempting to trap him with her flail. As always, he'd take the attacks without flinching or would dodge a few with ease.
'Wait a moment…'
"Why the hell would Regulus need to dodge an attack?" Subaru muttered, out of breath.
"Wh-what, I suppose?" asked a barely conscious Beatrice. She barely had any mana left, so Subaru deactivated Second Shift, taking her burden as well.
'He's invincible,' he thought to her, not wanting to waste their energy on speaking. 'Why does he need to dodge?'
'Perhaps his invincibility is temporary, in fact.'
His eyes widened as he exclaimed, 'That's it!'
'Huh?'
'Look, there can only be one Witch Factor of each type, right?'
'Theoretically, I suppose.'
'So, would there be a malfunction of sorts to the original holder of the Authority if another Witch Factor suddenly appeared?'
She thought for a moment. 'Echidna's notes on it were merely idle speculation, but yes, in fact. A Witch Factor can be shared, but there is still only one for each sin. Wait, aren't we –'
'Using the Authority of Greed against the Sin Archbishop of Greed? Yes. Yes, we are.' They grinned at each other as he said, 'Looks like we have a fighting chance, Beako.'
'It seems we do, I suppose.' Her smile widened as she held his arm tight. 'I have no idea how any of this is possible, but I'm happy that Betty's Subaru is back, I suppose.'
Adrenaline pumped through him. They could do this.
"Emilia!" he called out.
"El Huma! I'm kind of busy, Subaru!" she shouted back.
"His vulnerability is on a time limit! He can't hold it forever!"
Emilia didn't look his way, but he could tell she understood. She redoubled her efforts, weaving in and out of Regulus's attacks as she steadily gained ground. She ducked as the air above her shifted, using the opportunity to place her palms on the earth below her. A massive snowflake materialized with her hands as the epicenter, and from each point, an ice soldier came into existence.
As always, the ice soldiers were a perfect replica of her knight.
"Charge!" she shouted, pointing dramatically at Regulus.
Beatrice scowled. 'This is what you've been teaching her, I wonder?!'
'What can I say?' he smugly told her. 'I have a thing for badasses.'
The soldiers crowded around Regulus, assaulting him with a barrage of spears. With a mere thought, Regulus demolished each of them. Ice shards flew in every direction–
"Ah!"
"Emilia!"
Emilia crumpled to the ground, her own ice magic piercing her heart.
Unable to focus, Subaru unwillingly deactivated Cor Leonis. Rem, halfway through a swing of her flail, collapsed in exhaustion. Beatrice, out of mana, fell unconscious.
It was over.
Subaru tried running to Emilia's side, but Regulus darted forward, covering over ten meters in less than a second. Regulus kicked Subaru under the chin with enough force to send him careening onto his back.
"The audacity! The gall! I am the Sin Archbishop of Greed, Regulus Corneas! I am the greatest, most excellent example of an upstanding being! I am unselfish beyond all compare! The sheer amount of insolence, impertinence, and impudence you must carry to steal such a precious thing from an innocent man! It is a clear violation of my rights!"
But Subaru wasn't listening to Regulus's deranged ramblings. He was too busy trying to crawl towards Emilia.
Even though he knew it was pointless. Even though her light had gone out.
He needed to reach her.
Regulus's face twisted in rage when he realized he was being ignored. The air around them shifted, and an excruciating pain overtook Subaru as he screamed.
"Your legs are nothing compared to what you stole from me! I've been looking all day for it, and when I finally find what is rightfully mine, you will not give it back? Did I do something wrong? Was it my fault? No, it could not have been! I do not need to change! It's you! You're wrong! You stole from me! Horrible! Disgusting! Such disrespect shall not be allowed!"
Regulus kicked Subaru in the gut, knocking the wind out of him as he coughed up blood. "Number 292 was a vile bitch! She scratched me when I married her, and it hurt! The dress, she must have hated the dress! Number 217 stitched the seams wrong and it was unforgivable unfathomable irredeemable! It was her fault! That's why the face was wrong! The face, the lovely face of my lovely wife, was ugly and twisted! That must be why it hurt! A face, a pretty face is an ugly face when it smiles or frowns, and her visage was twisted because of you! It's your fault! That's the only possible the only no other way the only explanation! That must be why the Heart is gone! But why is it in you? Do you pity me? Is that why? DO NOT PITY ME, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! WHYWHYWHYWHYWHY DO YOU HAVE MY HEART?!"
A torrent of power and Subaru's lungs were crushed. Pain like nothing he'd ever experienced exploded inside of his chest. His throat filled with blood, but with the last of his breath, he uttered a single word.
"…a…"
"What? Speak up! I cannot be bothered to strain my ears to listen to you!"
"Em…i…lia…"
Regulus's eyes darkened. His screaming ceased, changing instead to a calm, almost resigned whisper. "I see… I was hoping you'd say something like, 'Here you go. I am respecting your rights and giving back what I stole.' But no, you do not bother to think of me or consider me. I, the most satisfying existence in this world, do not come first to you." He pulled his hand back and snarled. "If you shall not give back what you stole, then I shall take it from you."
Regulus thrust his arm forward, tearing a hole straight through Subaru's chest and the ground beneath them.
The last thing Subaru saw was Emilia's bloody corpse. He closed his eyes for the final time...
...and opened them in another realm.
He had been here before: Satella's Citadel of Shadows, with its spires of darkness and floor of nothingness.
The Witch's Hand that gripped his heart was not gentle. It was rough, possessive. It wanted, no, needed him.
"I love you I love you I love you I love you"
He squirmed, but he knew it was futile. There was no escape from this madwoman.
"Mine mine all mine all mine don't leave me don't leave me love you love you"
The shadows enveloped him, trying to make him one with the Witch.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, a solitary tear leaking from his eye.
"I love you I love you I love you I love you"
"It's my fault… all my fault…"
"I love you I love you YOU'RE MINE ALL MINE NOT HERS ALL MINE love love I love you I love you"
"I'm sorry, Satella… I was so selfish…"
"I love you I love you love love don't leave don't leave THEY CAN'T HAVE YOU THEY CAN'T HAVE YOU"
"…Stop."
"Mine mine stay with me stay with me I love you I love you"
"I said stop!" he screamed at the top of his lungs, as the shadow retreated in shock. "Stop loving me! Stop revering me! This is my fault! I did this to you!"
He choked out a sob, but the shadow did not come near him again. "Hate me, loath me, resent me, kill me, anything but this! I can't take it!" He fell to his knees and put his head in his hands. "I can't… I can't do this. I don't deserve your love."
All he had ever done was bring her pain.
"So… stop. Stop loving me."
He knew he had no right to ask her for anything, but he had even less of a right to her love.
He felt a cool pressure on his cheek, but it was not the Witch's power. It was a familiar hand, gentle and soft.
"You are a fool, my love," Satella whispered. "Stubborn, obstinate, and pig-headed."
He couldn't help it. He laughed derisively. "Says the woman who wants me to kill her."
She looked sternly at him. "Says the man who wants me to hate him."
They stared at each other for a moment before he sighed. "We're a mess, aren't we, Ella?"
She hummed in agreement. "We never did have it easy."
"But we stuck together."
"Always. Through sickness and through health, but mostly sickness."
"For better or for worse, but typically worse."
"Whether rich or poor, but usually poor."
"Till death do us part, and I certainly died."
"May we say our solemn vows in this forsaken shrine."
"Damn, our situation sucks."
Despite everything, she smiled. Centuries later, it still took his breath away.
"So… new girlfriend?" she teased.
He flinched as he quickly said, "Look, reincarnation makes your love life very complicated. Plus, she's like, half of you. Or are you half of her? But you're also individuals, and… Look, this is messy, all right?"
"Don't worry. I approve." She grinned mischievously. "She's cute."
"Now you're complimenting your own appearance!"
She giggled slightly. He was surprised she was capable of such a thing after all this time.
After all he did to her… and all he put her through… he still made her happy.
He sighed. "Look, Ella –"
"You want to remember this encounter."
He gaped. "How…"
Her eyes danced playfully. "Because I like you."
He shot her a playful scowl. "Of course, you saw that. You know, some might call it creepy that you're watching everything I do."
She smiled fondly and cupped his cheek. "But you don't mind, do you?"
"Can't say that I do," he grumbled, unable to stay mad at her for long. He leaned into her touch as they sat in silence.
"So, why now?" she asked at length. "It's been so long since you've asked me for this."
"I always want to remember you," he declared like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"But I didn't let you before," she argued. "Why should I change my mind now?"
"Because I made a promise to you," he reminded her, hoping it would be enough.
"Then say it again," she demanded. It was clear she was taking no chances.
"But I already –"
"Please," she begged. "I need to hear it."
His eyes pierced hers as he tried to convey as much sincerity as possible. "I promise to not treat my life as a commodity." He took a deep breath. "And… no matter how much I want to see you, I won't willingly use Return by Death. I will treat every loop as my last."
She searched his eyes for a long time before nodding slowly. "Okay," she conceded. "I will allow you to remember what happened."
"For every time," he clarified. "Not just this one."
She hesitated. "But… those include…"
"I know." His eyes shone with resolution. "Some of those are exclusively the Witch. Consider those memories a source of motivation, yeah?"
A pause. Then, reluctantly, she murmured, "As you wish, my love."
For a time, they simply enjoyed each other's company. "You're almost fully healed," she whispered. "Will you be okay?"
He raised an eyebrow, asking, "What would happen if I said 'no?'"
Even if he ran, Regulus would not stop looking for the one who stole his Lion's Heart, and no one can hide from the Witch's Cult.
She bit her lip. "You know there's only so much I can do," she said regretfully. "I try every time you're in trouble, but… the other me resists it. 'Tis rare for me to break through."
He smiled gratefully. "Hey, you sent Patrasche and shielded me from Capella's Authority. I'd say that's a lot."
"But 'tis not enough," she insisted. "I want to shield you from everything. I want you to be happy." She lowered her gaze. "I want you to be free of me."
A lump formed in his throat. "Don't… Don't say that."
"I will say what needs to be said. We lived our lives together, and all I did was bring you pain." She was crying now, and she pushed his hand away when he tried to wipe her tears. "I will always love you, Subaru, but I need you to move on. I want you to be happy. You can't do that if you're so fixated on me."
Ignoring her protests, Subaru wrapped her in a tight hug. "I won't give up on you, Ella," he whispered into her ear. "I don't give a damn what you say. Nothing will stop me from loving you. There's a reason I married you."
She relented and leaned into his embrace. Centuries later, she still fit perfectly in his arms. "But you know as well as I do that we can't be together anymore."
He shook his head. "No, I don't know that."
"But –"
"I'm going to save you, Ella," he said stubbornly. "I love you, and I'm not going to throw you away that easily."
She buried her face into his shoulder, just like she used to all those years ago. "Let's say that you're right," she began hesitantly. "Somehow, you free me and remove my Witch Factor. I'd be executed immediately for my crimes."
He shook his head vehemently. "I won't let that happen. We'll run away together."
"But my illness –"
"No more buts." He stroked her hair as he tried to ignore how cold her scalp felt. "I've been doing a lot of research. I believe that if I use True Face on you every day, it won't be an issue anymore."
Sobs wracked her body as she clung to him. "Th-then you're saying that you'd choose me over Emilia."
He tensed. "Th-that's –"
"If you save me, you will have to choose," she told him shakily. "Right now, you're saying you'll choose me. However, if you were holding Emilia in your arms, you'd tell her that you'd choose her.
"But I –"
"When that time comes, I want you to choose Emilia." She frowned at his stricken look. "I say this because I love you. Because I want you to be happy. That won't happen if you're with me."
He grimaced. "You're both so damn stubborn," he grumbled. "If Emilia and I were having this conversation, she'd say to choose you. Hell, she'd probably offer herself as a vessel."
Satella's fingernails dug into his back. "I would never allow that."
"Neither would I, but if you were in Emilia's position, you'd offer the same."
She said nothing in response. She didn't have to.
"You're both selfless while claiming to be selfish." It was one of the things he both loved and hated about them. "You're both endlessly kind. You're both sweet and fun to be around. I love both of you equally and unconditionally."
He clenched his fists. "It's not fair… You shouldn't even be two people. I can't just choose one of you."
A pause. "But you'll have to."
Subaru wanted nothing more than to prove her wrong; he'd make a promise to save her, keep her alive, and be with both her and Emilia.
But he couldn't. He had to choose.
Satella needed to be away from the eyes of the law, but she also needed to be around Subaru so she wouldn't die. He refused to leave her behind.
Emilia needed to be queen so she could save the elves. She had a dream, a mission. Subaru wouldn't, no, couldn't force her to give that up for his sake. If she ran away, then she wouldn't be the Emilia he fell in love with. Leaving the elves to rot would break her.
If Subaru had left Emilia's side... well, he's seen what happened to her without his intervention.
Subaru refused to let them merge. He knew all too well how "The Ordeal" worked. If Emilia were to try and take in Satella's soul, she would be replaced. It wouldn't be Emilia and Satella, but Satella in Emilia's corpse.
Subaru had read about lots of love triangles, but none were this... convoluted. Even if he somehow decided he liked one better, there were drastic consequences to his choice.
He took a shuddering breath. "We're trapped again, aren't we?"
Satella's silence spoke volumes.
"I don't know what will happen in the future," he admitted. He stroked her cheek, trying to derive some comfort from the contact, but she was so cold. "I don't know who I'll choose. I'll do everything I can to avoid that choice, but…"
"It may be inevitable." She threaded a hand through his hair. Despite her shaky fingers, it always managed to soothe him. "We'll get through it when the time comes. For now, do me a favor, my love."
"Anything," he said without hesitation.
"Say one good thing about yourself."
He groaned. "Of all the things…"
She smiled through her tears. "You need more self-confidence. I know how you feel about your past life, but I forgave you long ago. Even if I hadn't, your actions in this life have been… well, I believe you'd call it 'a redemption arc.'"
He let out a choked laugh. "Nothing can redeem my actions. I'll spend my life atoning for my sins. And please, I'm absolute scum in this life, too."
"If you're referring to your 'girl problems,' then you don't have to worry about them," she insisted. "These are extreme circumstances."
He rolled his eyes. "'Extreme circumstances' my ass. May I remind you that I also fell in love with Rem?"
She paused before admitting, "To be completely honest, I fell for her a little bit after hearing that confession."
He couldn't help but laugh. "Okay, yeah, that's fair."
Then, in a chiding manner, she said, "Still, the way you rejected her was cruel. You could have said, 'I'm sorry, but I don't feel the same way.' Did you have to declare your undying love for Emilia right in front of the poor girl?"
"Yeah, yeah," he grumbled. "You're making it hard to think of something good to say about myself."
"Sorry."
"You don't sound very sorry!" He thought for a moment before his face lit up. Looking directly into her eyes, he declared, "I have excellent taste in women."
She pouted. "That's not fair... That's a compliment to me, not you."
"I disagree," he declared stubbornly. "Favor completed."
She tried to look mad but couldn't maintain it. "Our time is up," she said instead. "I'll miss you." She gave him a hard look. "That is not an invitation to come visit."
He laughed. "Got it. No upcoming dates with the wife."
"Don't sound too excited. I – Mmph?!"
For the first time in four hundred years, Subaru kissed Satella.
Her kisses were warm, gentle, soft. They touched his soul in such a way that he could feel every drop of her love pouring into him.
At least, they used to.
Now, her lips were cold, shaky, unstable. They were not full of life like they once were. They were the touch of a Witch, decaying and rotten.
At that moment, Subaru tasted death, and it broke his heart.
"I love you, Ella." He leaned his forehead against hers, longing for the day where he could feel his Satella's touch again. "I will save you."
For the first time in centuries, Satella allowed hope to crawl into her voice. "I look forward to it, my love."
The world around them faded away, but he remembered everything.
Subaru cracked his eyes open in the real world. It was still the middle of the night. He turned to check the calendar he kept on his nightstand.
"Five days before we leave for the capital," he mumbled to himself. "That's… really good, actually."
He threw off the blankets and tried to get up but found himself held back. A sleeping Beatrice was gripping his hand tightly, steadily draining his mana. Subaru smiled fondly at the spirit. "I don't know why you bother having your own bed when you always sleep in mine. You're making my reputation as the lolimancer even worse, you know that?"
She shifted in her sleep but didn't wake up.
He gently unraveled his fingers from hers, giving her hair a quick ruffle. "I wouldn't have it any other way. Sweet dreams, Beako. I love you."
"Books… So many… I suppose… Hopeless contractor… in fact…"
Subaru stifled a laugh and headed for the door. Giving a silent apology to Puck, he used Door Crossing to enter Emilia's room. Logically, he knew she was fine, but he needed to see for himself.
Moonlight streamed through the window into the large bedroom, illuminating Emilia's pale face. He sat on the edge of her bed and ran his fingers through her hair. He marveled at the softness and admired the way each strand reflected the moonlight in a different way. She was captivating.
Subaru would say he'd never seen anything more beautiful, but he tended to say that a lot around her.
"I'm a lucky man, aren't I?" He sighed happily. "The luckiest man in the world. I don't deserve you, Emilia-tan."
She looked so calm, so peaceful right now. She mumbled in her sleep, and Subaru leaned in closer to hear it.
"Mhm… Subaru… I like you sooo much…"
'Gah! EMT is too damn adorable!'
Subaru couldn't take the cuteness anymore. His heart swelled… and broke the next second.
The mere thought of choosing between Emilia and Satella threatened to destroy him. He pulled back his sleeve and scratched roughly at his arm, but it didn't ease the pain.
So, he did the only thing he knew how to do and ran from his problems. After all, his convoluted love triangle wasn't the only thing going on.
They had to face Regulus Corneas. The Sin Archbishop of Greed.
There was something wrong with Regulus. He still had Stillness of an Object's Time – an absurdly overpowered ability, mind you – but because of Subaru's appearance in this timeline, Regulus no longer had Lion's Heart. That seemed to put some sort of limit on his powers. Subaru idly wondered if something similar was happening to Guese before getting his thoughts back on track.
They needed a plan, and fast.
The next morning, Subaru found himself in a small, indoor amphitheater, standing before Emilia, Rem, and Ram.
"Welcome back, everyone!" said Subaru with a grin. "Please, take your seats."
"We're already sitting, Barusu," snarked Ram. "Please, end your life."
"It's t-too… early." Emilia stretched her arms and yawned. "C-can't these meetings happen a little later?"
Subaru remained bright and cheery. "Not a chance, EMT. We gotta make the most of our day!"
Rem, of course, was awake and energetic. "I'm ready to start! What's on the agenda, Sir Subaru?"
Subaru gave her a mock-glare. "I don't like your cheek, but I love your enthusiasm!" He slammed his palms on the podium – he insisted he had one, much to Ram's consternation – and began his announcements. "Welcome to the Daily War Council of the Emilia Camp. As always, we will create battle strategies for usage against the Witch's Cult, mabeasts, and…" he sighed, "pepirs."
Emilia despised pepirs.
"Today, however, is a bit more serious," he continued. "This is one of those 'something bad is about to happen and I can't tell you how I know it' moments."
Emilia frowned. She was significantly more awake after that announcement. "I don't like those moments."
"Cut the theatrics, Barusu," Ram scolded. "I have a nap to get to."
"Don't act like that's more important than a war council!"
"Anything involving you is less important than a nap."
"Relax, Sister," pleaded Rem. "We've learned to trust Subaru on these matters."
Subaru gave Rem a nod of thanks. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news," he began grimly, "but we need to prepare. In five days, the capital will be under attack by Regulus Corneas, the Sin Archbishop of Greed."
Emilia gasped. "He's… he's still alive?"
Subaru nodded gravely. "I'm afraid it's not so easy to eliminate someone like Regulus. His Authority of Greed… well, it's a lot more powerful than Cor Leonis, that's for sure."
And so, he told them all he knew about Regulus's powers, as well as a rudimentary plan for beating him. "And that's when Ram will –"
"I will be doing nothing, Barusu," stated Ram with crossed arms.
Subaru shot her a surprised look. "What do you mean?"
"Are you stupid, Barusu?" Ram asked incredulously. "My place is by Lord Roswaal's side. I will not be accompanying you."
Subaru deflated slightly but nodded. "I… You're right, yes."
"Wait, I don't understand," Emilia interjected. "Considering what's about to come, we need everyone to help, and you're letting her stay behind?"
"It's not her choice," he answered, though he didn't take his eyes off Ram. "There's more to it than simply choosing Roswaal over me. Am I correct, Ram?"
Ram clenched her fists and narrowed her eyes but said nothing.
"Your situation... It's not fair. Please, let me help you."
Ram's eye twitched, but if Subaru could just get through to her...
"Roswaal's is a horrible person, trapping you like this. Trust me, I understand –"
"You understand nothing, Barusu." Her face twisted in disgust and anger, and Subaru forcibly reminded himself that this wasn't his Ram. "How arrogant must you be, to think I was forced into such a position? You act all high and mighty, claiming you can understand everyone's pain, but you can't. I'm sick of it! You have no idea what it's like to dedicate your life to someone the way I have. You will never understand the devotion I show to Lord Roswaal. Someone like you will never feel the way I do. You don't –"
"That's enough."
It was not Subaru who spoke with such contempt. His frown deepened. "Emilia…"
"I'm tired of you constantly belittling Subaru," she seethed. "You have no idea what he does for the people he loves. He's dedicated his life to saving Sa- saving his beloved. Everything he does is for her, and you have the gall to say he doesn't understand devotion?"
Tears formed in Emilia's eyes. She found out the man who destroyed her home was still alive, and now Ram was insulting her knight. It was too much to handle. "If you won't help, fine. I'm sure you have your reasons, but don't ever attack Subaru with such baseless claims. I won't stand for it!"
Subaru placed a hand on Emilia's shoulder as if trying to place a lid on her rage. "Anger doesn't suit you, Emilia," he said softly.
She turned to him with watery eyes. "B-but –"
"Ram is only acting out in defense of those she cares about, just like you are right now." He smiled sadly at Emilia. "Really, I appreciate you sticking up for me, but getting upset doesn't solve anything. I mean, you've always done your best to understand everyone, even the scummiest of beings. Surely you can understand someone like Ram. She's just a girl with some boy problems."
"I resent that description, Barusu," muttered Ram, but she was promptly ignored.
"I… yes, you're right," Emilia mumbled. She turned to Ram and held out her hand. "I'm sorry, Ram. I took my stress out on you and I let my temper get the best of me. I'm sure there are things going on that I'm not seeing, and that your reasons are perfectly valid." She managed a smile. "So, um… are we good?"
Ram took Emilia's hand and shook it daintily, reverting back to the perfect maid. "Of course, Miss Emilia."
Knowingly, Emilia asked, "Are you saying that because I'm 'Miss Emilia,' or because we're friends?"
Ram gaped. "I… what?"
Emilia's smile brightened. "Someone important to me once taught me what it means to have a friend, and it's wonderful. I know that you and I don't talk much, and I, um… I just yelled at you, but I'd love to have you as my friend."
Ram couldn't respond. She simply stared at Emilia with her jaw dropped.
Rem took the opportunity to step in. "Sister would love to be your friend, Miss Emilia!"
Ram looked at Rem, betrayed. "What are you doing, Rem?" she hissed. Rem gave a playful grin in response.
Emilia clapped her hands together. "Then, it's settled! Thank you for being my fifth friend, Ram!"
Subaru raised an eyebrow. "Fifth?"
"Mhm." She counted off on her fingers, saying. "First was Subaru, then Reinhard, then Rem and Beatrice, and now Ram!"
Nobody commented on how Roswaal was omitted.
"I…" Everyone looked to Ram, who seemed to be struggling to speak. Seemingly giving up, she gave a hasty bow and retreated.
Rem smiled fondly at her retreating sister before turning back to Emilia. "Just so you know, that's Sister-Speak for, 'I'd love to be your friend! You're such a friendly girl, Miss Emilia!'"
Emilia grinned happily as if the words came from Ram instead of her sister. "That's wonderful! How would I say, 'You're so cool, Ram,' in, um, Sister-Speak?'"
A mischievous glint entered Rem's eyes. "It would roughly translate to, 'Die, Barusu.'"
Emilia giggled as Subaru grimaced. "Gee, thanks," he grouched. "Never thought I'd hear that out of your mouth, Rem."
Rem gave a sly grin. "I am only acting as translator, Sir Subaru."
Subaru tried to frown, but it was hard when two of his favorite people were having so much fun. Soon, they would plan a battle against Regulus. For now, he would enjoy the moment.
Eventually, Rem left to go look for her sister. Subaru wrapped his arms around Emilia, grateful that she was alive. Not for the first time, he vowed to protect her.
However, that didn't mean he had to accept everything she said. "Hey, Emilia-tan?"
Emilia gave a quiet "hmm" as she leaned against him.
"You were wrong about something, you know."
She looked up at him, her eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean?"
"You said I do everything for Satella, but that's not true."
If anything, she looked even more confused. "But…"
"Yes, it's true that I'm trying to save her, and it means the whole world to me that you want to help me with that. Honestly, I'm still in shock. What girl wants to help her boyfriend reunite with his ex?"
Her confused expression melted into a fond smile. "I do. It's like you said, isn't it? I'm a hopeless romantic."
Subaru scowled. "Say that this all works out, and Satella is saved. I can't have you both, so what happens to you?"
She snuggled into his chest, humming as she did so. "I'd miss you, of course, but I would let the two of you live in peace, and I'd always fondly remember the time we spent together. If worse comes to worst, she needs to use me as a vessel, so be it. You deserve a happy ending, Subaru. That's what matters most to me."
He gripped her tightly, unable to speak for a moment. Then, after careful consideration about what to say…
"Bullshit."
"Huh?" She leaned back to look at Subaru, confounded. "I don't –"
"You'd give up your life so that I could be with another woman?" he asked incredulously. "Not even Freud could think of a complex that ridiculous! What the hell happened to, 'I'll have to try super-duper hard to get you to choose me'?"
She bit her lip and admitted. "I've thought about it for a long time. It's not like I want to see you with another woman, but I realized… you only like me because of Satella's soul. I'm just her replacement. I'm selfish, and I'm taking advantage of your love for her to keep you by my side."
He looked at her in disbelief. "Seriously? I already told you that I liked you before I knew Satella!"
She shook her head. "That's because subconsciously –"
"No!" he exclaimed, causing her to jolt in his arms. "You don't get to psychoanalyze this shit! I look at you and I see Emilia!"
That seemed to give her some solace, but her eyes were still sad. "That makes me happy… I think." She looked away, ashamed. "It's still not right… you love her. You only like me."
He gaped. "You're joking, right? Please tell me you're joking."
"Of course not." She frowned. "Why would I joke about something like this?"
"You're… you're just so… ugh! You're so damn oblivious!"
"What? I don't understand…"
"Did you seriously never consider that I didn't say 'I love you' to avoid freaking you out? I mean, you knew me for a week! I wasn't going to drive you away with a confession like that!"
Emilia's eyes widened. "Wh-what are you saying, Subaru?"
He threaded a hand through his hair, then took a deep breath to let go of his frustration. "Do I really need to spell it out for you?"
She looked into his eyes but didn't deny it.
"I love you, Emilia. I love you so much that it hurts. I love how kind you are, and how every little thing makes you happy. I love how selfless you are and how you stick to your giving nature, even if it hurts you. I love how strong you are and how I know I can always rely on you. I love how breathtakingly beautiful you are and how you fit so perfectly in my arms. I love you so much that it drives me crazy."
"Subaru…"
"That's where you were wrong, Emilia. I don't do everything for Satella. It's both of you equally. I'm not choosing one woman over the other. I just… I can't. I can't make that choice. I know that's wrong. I know that makes me scummy. If there's a time when I have to choose, I… just thinking about it makes me want to die. I can't do that."
He knew he was rambling, but he didn't care. "This isn't only about me. You deserve a happy ending, too. You need to be alive for that. I won't give up on you, and I would never, ever let you become a vessel, you got that? Trading you for her… love doesn't work like that. That won't make anyone happy."
He took a deep breath to calm his racing heart. "Look, I… I need you to understand. You're not a replacement. I know you and Satella look the same, and sometimes, you even act the same, but you're not the same. You're Emilia. You're hopeful, earnest, silly, optimistic, innocent, oblivious, energetic, and passionate. To you, a given word is a binding oath, and you'll always put others first, even when you're in pain.
"Don't you see? These are the things that make you who you are. That's not because of her soul, but you. I'm in love with you, and that's because it's you.
"I love you because you're Emilia."
Emilia looked like she was about to cry. "S-Subaru… You're such a… You make me…" She took a long, shuddering breath as she gave in to his warmth. "I'm so selfish, aren't I?"
He gently cupped her cheek and she leaned into his touch. "It's not selfish to accept someone's love."
"S-so I'm allowed to feel this happy? To feel this warm?"
"I'll make you feel like this every day if you'll let me."
"…I want that. I want that more than anything else."
A lone tear ran down her cheek and he wiped it off. She held him close and ran her hand through his hair, just as she so often did, but this time, she pulled him down…
...and kissed him.
It was gentle, hesitant, soft. It screamed inexperience but whispered passion. Her lips were fire on his, and his entire body thrummed with life.
Despite his shock, he pulled her closer, letting her warm body lay flush against his. Her hands moved from his scalp to his neck as her delicate fingers sent lightning through millions of nerve endings.
He burned the wonderful sensations into his mind as he rejoiced, for this was every dream come true.
Never, in any loop, timeline, universe, anything, had a sane Emilia kissed him.
Never had he felt so alive.
She pulled back slowly as if she couldn't bear to part with him. Her amethyst eyes shone with affection and joy as she said the words that changed his life forever.
"I'm in love with you, Subaru Natsuki."