Chapter 44: He's Dead
The big guy hit the wall and slumped to the floor, groaning in pain. Several buddies who'd been ready to jump in immediately thought better of it and quietly slipped out of the bar like nothing had happened.
"What's it gonna be, tough guy? Want to keep playing?" Ron grabbed him by the head and lifted him up, his tone deceptively gentle, but it sent chills down the big guy's spine.
The man's eyes were wide with terror. "No! No! I screwed up, okay? I'll take her and get out of here right now."
Without any encouragement from Ron, the guy struggled to his feet and backhanded the tattooed woman who was still gripping Caroline's hair and talking trash. Caroline finally broke free, stumbled over to Max in a daze, grabbed a bottle from the table, and chugged the whole thing.
That was 80-proof tequila!
Ron knew she was trying to work up some liquid courage, but the only thing that was going to accomplish was making sure she'd be completely unconscious for the rest of the night.
Sure enough, after finishing the bottle, Caroline took two wobbly steps - whether to continue her fight with the tattooed psycho or chat with Ron was anyone's guess - but it gave Ron the opening he needed.
Ron glanced at Max, and she happened to look back at the same moment. The two locked eyes, ignoring Caroline's presence entirely, the sexual tension practically crackling between them.
"Ron, looks like you won't be bored tonight. Lucky bastard," Howard said bitterly.
Seeing Howard's pathetic expression, Ron felt a twinge of sympathy. "Maybe it's a little early to throw in the towel? You sure you won't get any action tonight?"
"Come on, I may talk a big game with Leonard about being a player, but I know the truth - I'm not exactly a chick magnet," Howard hung his head. "Like you said, no woman's gonna sleep with me just because I'm wearing pantyhose on my arms, right?"
Honestly, seeing his friend like this did make Ron feel bad. After all, he had decent emotional intelligence, unlike some genius who'd traded all their EQ for IQ points.
"That might not be entirely true." At Ron's words, hope flickered in both nerdy scientists' eyes.
Ron noticed the tattooed woman's boyfriend had stormed out after a screaming match with his girlfriend, while the tattooed chick, sporting a fresh handprint on her face, was drowning her sorrows with her friends and another tattooed girl in a Ramones t-shirt.
Ron nodded in their direction, and the two nerds, like sharks sensing blood in the water, immediately followed his gaze.
"If you just march over there and call out the ungentlemanly behavior of hitting women, I guarantee you'll easily work your way into their conversation. Of course, feel free to trash-talk me behind my back afterward."
"No way! Absolutely not! We're bros. I'd never badmouth you behind your back!" Howard said quickly, noticing Ron's dangerous look, while Raj nodded frantically in agreement.
"Alright, there are your two targets. Go get 'em, tigers!" Ron gave them casual encouragement and headed toward Max, pulling her into his arms for a deep kiss.
"So, how'd your knight in shining armor do? Did I disappoint you, Your Majesty?" Ron kissed her hand with mock formality.
Max played along perfectly, pretending to gather up an imaginary ball gown, which made her chest bounce enticingly. "Not at all - you exceeded expectations, my brave knight. What reward would you like?"
"Power? Glory? Treasure?" Ron asked with exaggerated greed.
"That's quite a list. Maybe I should start interviewing replacement knights~"
"Then I'll just have to claim you as my prize." Ron swept Max up in a bridal carry amid her delighted squeals.
Max shot him a flirtatious look. "Hey! We still need to get this drunk mess home. If you're feeling strong, you might as well carry her too."
Ron gently set Max down and scooped up Caroline. "So where are we headed? Your place? My place? Or should we splurge on the Beverly Hills Hotel?"
"My apartment~"
Even unconscious Caroline seemed to join their little game. The thought of what was coming next was intoxicating, and Ron felt like his ultimate fantasy was finally within reach.
...
The next morning, Ron woke up in his own bed as usual. To spare Caroline any awkwardness and get some decent sleep, he'd once again satisfied Max thoroughly before heading home.
However, the first call he received that morning wasn't exactly pleasant.
"Ron, he's dead. Died in our lockup. Suicide," Jack's voice was grim.
"Who are we talking about?"
"The shooter you took down yesterday. The one who got hit by the car died en route to the hospital, and the other one you subdued - while our guys weren't watching, he bashed his own head against the cell wall until he was dead. Our leads just evaporated again.
Damn it, we've got a leak! And it's someone with serious clearance!"
Jack sounded completely frustrated.
"When hasn't law enforcement been leakier than the Titanic? I'm not shocked at all." Ron's response was ruthlessly sarcastic. "I wasn't counting on much anyway."
"You knew he'd kill himself, didn't you?"
Ron spat out his mouthwash. "Obviously! Think about it - what kind of guy has the balls to try assassinating a cop in broad daylight outside a Target? This screams cartel hit man."
"Cartel? How'd you figure that?"
Ron checked himself out in the mirror - still devastatingly handsome. "Jack, did you forget to take your brain pills this morning? Just think it through - who else would want Hank dead? He's a DEA task force officer with no complicated personal drama.
Besides the cartels, what other reason could there be for a professional hit like this?"
Ron paused, then added: "And I'm absolutely certain this was Mexican cartel work, because the whole operation reeks of their style of payback. Looks like Hank was onto something big. He must've discovered, or was about to discover, the foundation of their entire operation."
At this realization, Ron's eyes lit up. So it seemed like there might actually be a shot at that bonus money?
"I've been digging into Hank's cases too, and you're spot on. I think his theory's solid. That ghost chemist cooking the blue crystal meth is definitely still in business. I just can't figure out how he managed to flood the entire country with that stuff practically overnight. Did he get it stocked at CVS?"
"Maybe he cut a deal with that mysterious kingpin you mentioned? Yeah, that's gotta be it!" Ron was genuinely surprised by his own insight.
End of Chapter
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