Daddy sat at the table eating his oatmeal when Dani crawled out of her room the next day. She wasn't sure how he'd managed to dress himself, but he looked ready for church, his shirt and suit jacket as crisp as his dress uniform. A whiff of spray starch mingled with Brut aftershave brought comforting memories stretching back to her youngest days.
Dad sat ramrod straight and, even in his wheelchair, on eye level with her.
"About your friends." Daddy always did get right to the point.
"Friends wouldn't have done that." Dani tried to keep the sucking hole in the pit of her stomach out of her voice and put on a smile.
Daddy grunted, his jaw hard but his eyes soft.
"This band thing."
"I was trying to help a friend. I know that kind of music's not allowed, and I shouldn't have…"
"Just about killed your brother." Daddy reached under the table, setting the cassette carrier she'd hidden in her closet between them.
Dani felt heat rise up the back of her neck. "He had no right."
"He was worried." Daddy looked straight at her, waiting forever until she returned his gaze. "Should I be?"
Dani slumped into the chair across from him and looked away. Daddy's silence was worse than Vic's lectures. And she knew he'd sit there until she answered, no matter how long it took. "It's just music. I don't know. Probably. But not anymore. I'm done with that. Straight and narrow for me."
"About this guy."
Tears welled in Dani's eyes as she met her father's. She'd prepared herself for Daddy to be mad and didn't know what to make of his soft tone. He took her hands in his. She steeled her voice. "That song's over."
Daddy nodded slightly, grunting again. "You're old enough to make those choices." He sized her up as he slid the cassette carrier to her. "And these ones."
Did I just hear that?
"Thing about choices," Daddy said, looking away. "Every one you make will affect you."
"And other people," Dani sighed.
***
Vic went into the office before church Sunday morning to clear his things out of Dad's desk. Dad never let anything stop him long, and he intended to run his business—legs or no legs. Suits me fine.
He had to admit Dani handled that whole weird scene well yesterday. She'd told that bunch of losers she'd been hanging around to get lost. For a minute, Vic thought he'd have to pull her off Shelly's big-mouthed boyfriend, but he tucked and ran before Dani got her hands on him. By the time Dad got to them, the Ryder brothers and their friends were in full retreat, crawling back to whatever hole they'd crawled out of. And while Dani was obviously upset, she kept it together for Dad's sake and even managed a smile for the cameras as Dad raced to them, his arms wide as the wheelchair covered the last ten yards.
No more was said of the issue last night. Whatever became of it, Vic was glad it wasn't on his shoulders anymore.
Vic tossed the grease-splattered missionary brochures on top of his box. Won't be long now. Still, he needed to pick his moment. Far as Dad knew, he still planned to stay on and eventually take over the business. Dad needed to know restoring cars wasn't in his plans, preferably soon enough so the shop could find a replacement by the end of summer.
"Better to restore souls," Vic said to himself.
"Some of us need it."
The voice startled Vic. It was the jerk who wrapped his arms around Dani yesterday.
***
"Let's take your car," Daddy said.
Didn't he know?
"Keys are in it."
Dani wondered how he got the parts so quickly, to say nothing of who had done the work, but she wasn't about to argue. She opened the garage door so Daddy could maneuver onto the newly installed ramp. Before she could turn to heft him into the car, he opened the GTO's passenger door and managed to pull himself most of the way into the seat. One more grunt and his boots rested on the floorboard.
Dani double-checked to make sure the radio was tuned to the Christian station. Some song she'd never heard about the Lion of the Tribe of Judah. Her car gave a throaty growl as she shifted into gear. Daddy scowled when she hit the gas. So sue me, I'm over-enthused. In her peripheral, she caught the corners of his mouth relaxing into a smile as soon as he figured her eyes were on the road.
When they arrived, Daddy whistled low. Dani had never seen the church's parking lot so full and was sure Daddy hadn't, either. Fortunately, there were three handicapped spots open in the front row. Dani veered toward the nearest.
Daddy shook his head. "Park over there." He pointed to the few remaining spots nestled in the back of the lot.
Dani started to protest. Saw the set of his jaw. Thought better of it.
It took a full twenty-five minutes for Daddy to wheel himself through friends, acquaintances, well-wishers, and curious strangers, but he wouldn't let Dani push.
"Sorry we're late," Daddy said to Pastor Stenger as he wheeled through the front door.
The preacher frowned slightly. "See that it doesn't happen again," he said, elbowing Daddy's shoulder and giving Dani a wink.
Dani followed behind Daddy's chair, marveling. She'd never seen the sanctuary more than half full. Kari brushed past, flanked by teenagers carrying extra chairs from the youth room.
"Oof!" Dani almost fell over Daddy's shoulder into his lap. Looking up, she saw what made him stop so suddenly.
Vic sat in the front pew, left side, where the family always sat. Next to him sat a smartly dressed redhead, her hair pulled into the tightest upside-down French braid Dani had ever seen. And on the other side of her, in ripped jeans and all his heavy metal glory, sat Jon.
I tried to get you to come to church for a month.
The veins on the back of Daddy's neck stood at attention. He wheeled in front of the pew, taking the spot next to Jon.
Sad? Hurt? Excited? Dani tried to define her emotional soup. Mostly mad, she decided. And lonely in a way she'd never known before. That girl's the type Jon likes. Good girl type. Sure got over me fast.
Jon hung his head as he extended his hand. "Mr. Grassigli."
Daddy grunted, eyes front. Dani wanted to crawl under the pew. She tried to be subtle when she elbowed him.
Daddy glanced over at her before turning to stare a hole in Jon. Jon winced, stifling a gasp as Daddy shook his hand. Jon looked like he wanted to catch her eye but didn't dare while Daddy maintained his grip. After what seemed a lot longer than it probably was, the Marine released the singer's hand. "Mr. Ryder."
Dani suppressed a smile, but as she watched Jon clench and unclench out of the corner of her eye, all she could think was guess he won't be holding her hand for a while.
***
Dani tried paying attention to the service, but she couldn't help looking over at Jon and the redhead. A couple times, Jon leaned over and whispered something to the girl. Or maybe to Vic. Impossible to tell without being obvious.
Don't look at him, Dani. The service was ending, and all Dani could remember of the message was it had something to do with God not withholding any good gift.
Pastor Stenger invited hearers to come to the front to receive what he always called the greatest of gifts—salvation through Jesus Christ. Most parts of the service changed from week to week, but he always gave altar calls the same way. Bet anyone that's been here more than a month could get up and give the altar call word-for-word if Pastor gave them the mic. But Dani figured most of this morning's crowd was hearing it for the first time. Dozens made their way to the front to pray with Pastor Stenger, Kari, or one of the other church leaders.
Kari seemed distracted as she prayed for people, her pinched smile taking obvious effort. Probably thinks that girl's with Vic.
The redhead seemed to be ignoring Jon, who was staring at the floor. Serves him right. Vic leaned over and said something to the girl. She responded quickly, but without a hint of expression on her face.
Dani caught Jon looking over at her. Lot of nerve while he's sitting with that other girl. He averted his gaze back to the floor when he caught Daddy's eye. Daddy doesn't have to be so mean.
After the benediction, a crowd formed around Daddy. Dani knew he hated crowds, but he did his best to smile, nod, and shake hands. Jon stood hangdog on the perimeter. Despite her best efforts to stop it, her heart still skipped a beat when their eyes met. If she didn't know better, she'd swear by his look he was trying to apologize. Doesn't matter. Nothing he could say would change yesterday or how he made me feel. She wrestled with tangible emptiness.
Dani was glad when Kari pulled her away before the crowd thinned enough for Jon to get to her.
On the way to Kari's office, they passed the redhead. Vic sat an arm's length from her, explaining something, hands waving, pointing, forming signs like he always did when he was excited about something. Her face was still as stone. Kari swallowed hard but kept on.
Dani prepared herself for one of Kari's special made-to-order, one-on-one sermons as they stepped into the office. She was overdue for one. What she wasn't prepared for was Shelly, shaking.
Dani could still hear the crowd milling outside after Kari shut the door. She took a seat, looking around and trying to avoid Kari's eyes. Same knickknacks. Same books in the same spots on the same bookshelves. Same Integrity music from the same cassette player on the same corner table playing just loud enough to make out the lyrics if you strained. Same blue betta swimming lazily in the same glass bowl with the same frosted world map etched onto it. The only thing missing was Kari's everlasting smile, the one she didn't even take off when she was dressing you down.
Kari leaned back against her desk, arms crossed, glasses in hand, eyebrows knit. She closed her eyes. "I won't go into the reasons you shouldn't be running with that crowd right now."
Dani slumped her shoulders. This is going to take a while. Still, she found hope rising inside that she might be able to see Shelly again.
Shelly dabbed at the mascara making a beeline for her puffy cheeks.
"But since you've been running with that crowd..." Kari hesitated, looking like she was thinking through what to say next.
Kari always knows what to say.
"Where's Bobby?" Shelly broke in.
"Being a klutz, the last time I saw him."
Shelly looked at the ground, making no effort to stem the flow of tears. Dani regretted her sarcasm immediately, but this was the first time she'd seen Shelly without bruises in a long time.
Kari placed a protective hand on Shelly's shoulder and took a deep breath. "Everyone saw him with you yesterday."
"I saw him the same time everyone else did."
"He wasn't there announcing my band's concert," said Kari.
"I kicked him out of my…"
Kari raised her eyebrows, tilting her head.
Did I just call Inferno my band? To Kari Andersen? Don't start biting your lip, stupid.
"Look, I quit Inferno. Honest."
Shelly shot her a how-could-you look as Kari lowered her voice to just above a whisper. "Listen, Shelly really needs to find Bobby."
"She needs to find Bobby right now like I need another purity sermon."
Kari looked like she'd been slapped.
"Besides," Dani said, "I chased him off. Far as I know, he's skipped town."
"And I've skipped a period," Shelly said, allowing a moment for that to sink in. "I'm pregnant and I'm scared and I've been kicked out of my house and I don't know what I'm going to do and I just need to…" Shelly gasped for breath and let out a string of colorful words, bringing bright red to Kari's face and finishing with "find Bobby."
"Even if I knew where he was, you're better off without him." Dani softened her voice. "And so is the baby."
Dani reached to embrace her. Shelly recoiled.
"Jon probably knows where he is." Lord, I'm not ready to talk to him. I can barely look at him. "I'll ask."