"So, as I understand it, you've already made your decision?"
Right now, I was visiting a certain young but extremely sweet girl who, unfortunately, had a penchant for overthinking and inventing problems for herself. Yes, I was in Emily's apartment, who, to my great joy, was finally looking much better after her long and, by all accounts, very emotional conversation with Sera. I was very glad they had managed to resolve all their differences. And, of course, I was very proud of myself, since I'd had a hand in it too and had saved this child from a fatal mistake that could have cost her absolutely everything.
"Yes. Thank you for… for stopping me back then…" Emily lowered her head slightly, looking away guiltily. It was clear to anyone, even the most clueless idiot, that she was terribly ashamed of having seriously considered "betraying" Heaven. The girl then materialized the very same Fruit of Knowledge in her hand and carefully passed it to me.
"Sera told me to give it away… I think giving it to you, Adam, is the right thing to do."
"Are you sure?" I took the apple but continued to watch the young Seraphim carefully. "If you still want it, then why not?"
"What do you mean?" Emily asked, completely misunderstanding my question. "Well… yes?" She immediately started staring at me as if I were some kind of lunatic… That stings, damn it.
"Well, I ate one of these myself, and I'm fine, living peacefully. So, who am I to forbid you? I never told you not to eat it," I shrugged. "I just laid out the real situation for you so you could make your choice knowing the whole truth, and not fall for the sweet, deceitful words of a certain sweet, dyed bitch…"
"…" To say the young Seraphim was in shock would be an understatement. But being the evil and cunning person I was, I didn't let on that it was all just a joke. "W-wait, you… you ate the Fruit of Knowledge?!" it finally dawned on the poor girl, from whose head a light wisp of smoke seemed to be rising.
"Yep. Eve managed to screw me over big time back then. I think you can understand now why I wasn't so eager for her to pull the same stunt with you," as confirmation of my dark bitch-ssence, I created a small, amusing little man made of pure Darkness on my palm. It bounced comically and immediately started waving at Emily, whose jaw dropped to the floor at the sight. Figuratively speaking.
"So, you really don't want it?" I shook the apple right in front of the girl's face.
"N-no, thank you," she said, giving me that look again, the one you give a psycho… It's a little insulting, hey!
"Hm, okay…" A snap of my fingers signaled the end of our conversation, and a golden, shimmering vortex opened in space before me. "Well, and…" a second before stepping through the vortex, I turned back to Emily, who had just breathed a sigh of relief. "Don't tell anyone about my fuck-up, okay? As you can see, I'm in complete control of myself and don't have any particular problems. But the trust of the other Seraphim and the entire Heavenly Court will be severely undermined if a fact like this suddenly comes out, okay?"
I had always given a big, fat middle finger to the Heavenly Court, but that was only because of my high position as an Archangel, the first man, and so on. In short, titles, even in Heaven, help you ignore the opinions of many, even quite important, individuals. The Heavenly Court consists not only of Seraphim, but also of archangels, thrones, dominions, and other heavenly riff-raff that we were briefly shown in the cartoon. Almost all of them were created by the Seraphim themselves and were responsible for various, smaller matters, like maintaining the beauty of the cities, checking the work of the cherubs, and so on. Small fry, in the old Adam's opinion, but these "small fry" nevertheless had a vote on the "Grand Council" and really did decide many important matters, so one shouldn't be too categorical. It's also worth noting that "Archangel" was a title that could be earned, whereas "Seraphim" was something like a race, only in a deeper, more fundamental sense. That's why the word was always capitalized. A Seraphim could earn the title of Archangel, but any other angel could also receive it, for great deeds in the name of the Light or for a great contribution to the defense of Heaven. Many heroes of that War were awarded the title of Archangel posthumously. And this very title allowed them to participate in the Heavenly Court. That's how it was.
"Okay…" Emily replied uncertainly, clearly wondering if she should, after all, report this psycho-Adam to the other Seraphim. But she definitely wouldn't. Although she might keep an eye on me for a while at first, once she realizes I haven't turned into a giant, evil monstrosity, she'll just back off. Because she's a good girl!
"That's great," I smiled. "See you later, angel," I patted the little one on the head, who had once again fallen into some kind of trance, and then disappeared into the portal, which immediately closed behind me. "I love driving beautiful women into this state!"
"What kind of state is that?" the King of Hell raised an eyebrow, greedily sucking on some kind of lollipop… God, what a surreal sight…
"Definitely not the kind you're thinking of, you pervert," I huffed. "You'd better tell me, will this thing of yours actually work?"
So, what were we actually doing, and where were we? Back when Schizo, in the form of the God-Slayer, was living and thriving in my long-suffering head, I had seriously considered creating my own unique combat form that would give me complete protection from the Darkness. The problem was that I already had protection from the Darkness now, but there was no Light in the body I had created—not a single "go fuck yourself" drop. So in it, I would have been severely limited in my powers and abilities. Lucifer, after listening to all this, had a good laugh at my expense and suggested creating a different, new body, and even offered up his own as a template. We agreed on that. But what to do now with this body, already matured and fully ready?
I was recently thinking about creating something like Purgatory from Supernatural, or, simply, an equivalent of Hell that would function specifically as a place of eternal, unending torment. An interesting thought came to me—this place would need its own workers and overseers, wouldn't it? I wasn't going to do it all myself, was I? I could probably suppress my philanthropy, albeit with great difficulty. But I want to live my own life too! I have a beautiful fiancée. If I didn't have all these problems right now, in the form of my crazy ex, I wouldn't leave the bed at all, and this project would definitely demand a lot of my time. And my dear friend from down under offered me an extremely elegant solution—to create my own, "first man." It required a lot of power to bring life to the body that was no longer suitable for me. But I had plenty, and Lucifer promised to back me up if needed. I can't believe I'm saying these words, but it seems he could actually be relied upon… Yeah, never thought I'd even think that, brr…
"Oh, he's had a hundred times more women than I have, and I'm the pervert…" Lucifer exclaimed, offended. "Of course it'll work. It's not as complicated as you fear. It's even relatively primitive. You could have handled it yourself."
"I had a lineage to continue, you monogamous weirdo," I retort. "Alright, what were you saying needed to be decided before its 'revival'?"
"A name and… something like a species name. Humans, cherubs, imps, succubi, you get the idea," Lucifer replied, waving his hand vaguely.
"Hmm…" Well, since the task of my first, so to speak, creation is to watch over dead souls in a future Purgatory-analogue, then his species name… "Reaper. His species will be called Reapers. And his name… Abaddon, it means 'Angel of the Abyss'."
"Epic. I love it," the clown clapped his hands, as if I were putting on some kind of show for him and not changing the world order. "You can begin. I'll back you up."
"Phew, let's do this!"
I concentrate a torrent of energy within me, containing both Darkness and Light, and then slowly fill the body of the beautiful, six-winged angel with this "soup." Damn, he looks so epic. I'll definitely copy my second, combat form from him. Light and Darkness immediately begin to annihilate each other, but due to the strong, all-encompassing pressure, they slowly but surely merge. Meanwhile, I completely cut off my perception of the outside world and concentrate on the character, personality, and information that will form the basis of this reaper's identity.
Some time passes like this, until I feel a hand on my shoulder. I open my eyes, greedily gasping for air that I don't actually need, but reflexes can't be denied.
"It's done," says Lucifer.
"Who… am I?.." the being blinks its brightly glowing, golden eyes, its mouth hanging open in surprise as it looks around in confusion.
"Your name is Abaddon. You are a Reaper, a being who will watch over the Abyss. A place where the souls of the worst of humanity will go," I answer… my son? Lucifer, by the way, had explained to me how to behave with one's creation in the beginning.
"Abaddon?" the Reaper said, looking at Lucifer and me with interest. "And you are?.."
"My name is Adam. I am your… Father," well, so what? I already have a whole bunch of kids, one more biological son won't be a problem, I think… The main thing is to later explain to all interested parties (ladies and gentlemen) that the origin of this Abaddon is a bit different. "And this is Lucifer, my assistant."
"Assistant?! I am your teacher!" the King of Hell immediately interjected, clearly not happy with the role of some "assistant."
"Well, you get the idea," I continue, ignoring Lucifer and addressing the Angel of the Abyss. "I imagine you have many questions right now, and I am ready to answer all of them…"
If I had had such an opportunity myself, to get all the answers to my questions at birth, I'm sure I wouldn't have made all the mistakes I made in the past, so spending a couple of hours on this would be a very wise decision…
Several hours of intense conversation later. An island on the first planet Adam embodied.
We talked a lot with my new son. The newborn guy had a great many questions, most of them quite complex and ambiguous, so I really had to rack my brain to formulate a genuinely good, correct answer for him. Lucifer bailed about fifteen minutes after Abaddon woke up, only briefly glancing at the new body for my second form.
The first thing Abaddon was taught was to change his appearance. Because observing a being without a living, human face wasn't very pleasant. But in human form, he looked quite good and didn't give me the creeps just by his presence. Abaddon's power was roughly on par with the old Adam, which, mind you, was a very high level. Moreover, there was a small particle of Light in him, which apparently manifested somehow during the creation of his soul, so he also had a slight defense against that very Light. Teaching him all the basic techniques and abilities turned out to be surprisingly easy. The Angel of the Abyss's control over energies was at a very high, almost intuitive level. And thanks to my clear explanations of all the processes and demonstrations of the final result, he mastered all new skills literally in minutes, which was very gratifying.
Just then, my helmet, which was lying folded in my pocket, vibrated. Who could it be, I wonder? Putting on the mask, I see the call is from Sif. Interesting. I accept the call.
"Father, I have an extremely difficult situation here," my son's anxious voice came through the receiver.
"Send the coordinates. I'll be there right away," I reply instantly. Discussing "difficult situations" over the phone isn't very convenient. And a brilliant idea suddenly popped into my head about what to do with this Abaddon while the "Abyss" wasn't ready yet, and the mechanism for transferring the worst of the worst into it hadn't been created and developed.
"Okay, sent," I get his reply, hang up, and, checking the coordinates, immediately create a portal to Earth.
"Let's go. I'll introduce you to your older brother."
"Brother?" Abaddon asked in surprise, already in his human form.
"Yep. His name is Sif. I think you'll get along," I step through the shimmering portal vortex and immediately close it after Abaddon follows me.
"So?"
I turn to Sif, immediately noticing that he's not alone, but in the company of two agents I know very well. And there, on the ground, lay three cherubs. Tied up.
"We found three strange creatures who were deceiving people and stealing their money," Linda began her report.
"We've already figured out that real angels don't do such things, so we caught them and called Sif to determine if they were demons, and if not, to ask them why they were committing all these outrages," John continued, striking a dramatic pose.
"Yeah. And I found out they're cherubs who were recently exiled from Heaven… Considering what you said," Sif hinted at my story with Deerie and Eve, "I decided I should call you before deciding what to do with them."
"Damn…" So, it seems the three loser cherubs from the canon have finally shown up… To be honest, I had even forgotten about them. Oh well…
"Um… please don't kill us! We were just hungry…" the female cherub squeaked in her tiny voice…
And what am I supposed to do with them now? It seems that before their "fall," they worked diligently, and no sins were noted against them, but the behavior of these cherubs after their exile… My little eye doesn't detect Eve's Darkness in them, which means they haven't met her yet. But in that case, what to do with them? Understand and forgive? Yes, they were under the direct command of that evil deer-lady and perhaps saw a bad example. But does that excuse them? And theft is far from the best course of action. So how should I deal with them?
"Father?" Abaddon's voice cut in when my silence had dragged on for too long. His question, in turn, caused an unhealthy excitement among the agents and an extremely pensive look from Sif.
"Hmm… Your punishment will be as follows: you are transferred to Sif's command. You will atone for your sins under his watchful guidance. After that, you can peacefully return to Heaven. Does that suit you?"
"YES!" The lamb-girl.
"Of course!" The baby one.
"It suits me…" The little ram.
This sad little ram was different from the others in that he was… sad. Fuck, the way that sounds…
"Sif, this is your younger brother. His name is Abaddon. And I would like him to live in the human world for a while, to get a better understanding of both humans and angels. Will you help him?"
"Well… I don't think there will be any particular problems with that," Sif replied after a moment's thought.
"And you, Abaddon, do you mind spending some time with your older brother on Earth?"
"No, Father, I would be glad to," the Angel of the Abyss replied with a sincere smile. Wonderful.
"Excellent. Then I shall take my leave. Stay in touch."
A flash, and I'm back in Heaven. Excellent. Now I'll lie down for a bit, rest, and then I can think about business again…