In front of the bookstore, Gintoki and Jiraiya, who had jointly purchased the pornbook, engaged in a fierce debate and tug-of-war over who would get to look at it first.
After a full ten minutes of arguing with no resolution, the two finally settled on a fair and feasible method.
They would let a random passerby act as the referee and under the referee's supervision, they would play a single round of rock-paper-scissors to decide the winner!
"Hey, you there! Come help us out!"
Jiraiya, who refused to let go of the pornbook with one hand, called out to a passerby without even turning his head.
"Wait, wait!"
Gintoki, who was also gripping the pornbook tightly with one hand, suddenly grew suspicious.
"Is it really okay to just grab some random person? That guy isn't some plant you set up, is he? You sure he's not secretly working with you?"
"Of course not! You're way too paranoid! Enough already, hurry up!"
Jiraiya, already at the end of his patience, had veins bulging on his forehead as he snapped back.
This silver-haired brat was seriously infuriating!
"Uh, hey, could you hold onto this for us for a second?"
Gintoki said, turning sideways along with Jiraiya to hand the pornbook to the long-haired passerby who had stopped at Jiraiya's call.
However, when Jiraiya got a clear look at the long-haired passerby's face, his expression gradually shifted, his eyelids twitching uncontrollably.
"Jiraiya, what are you doing here?"
The owner of the pale, slender, and well-defined hand that now held the book posed the question with absolutely no warmth in his voice.
"Ahaha~ Well, you know… just taking a little break along the way, that's all! I swear, I'm definitely not slacking off! Ahahaha…"
Jiraiya scratched his messy white hair and laughed awkwardly, trying to diffuse the murderous aura radiating from the other man.
But judging by the results, it had no effect whatsoever—the killing intent around the man was practically screaming at him!
"Anyway, I'm heading back now! Don't worry, Orochimaru! When Jiraiya makes a promise, he keeps it! Your wife and kid's safety won't be compromised in the slightest!"
Seeing Orochimaru's icy expression and the clear intent to kill in his eyes, Jiraiya sensed the danger and let go of the book, ready to bolt.
But—
"Summoning Jutsu!"
BOOM!!
"White Snake, kill Jiraiya!"
Hearing Orochimaru's voice behind him and sensing something enormous descending upon him, Jiraiya fled for his life in his sandals, arms flailing wildly.
"Are you serious?! Orochimaru!"
"Kill him!!"
BOOM!!!
...
As the sun set in the west.
Amidst a pile of rubble, an indifferent Orochimaru was handcuffed by the Konoha Police Force under the watchful eyes of the villagers.
At the same time, Jiraiya—lying unconscious on the ground in tattered clothes—was also cuffed and prepared for imprisonment.
And, of course, there was also the silver-haired perm-head who had been caught in the crossfire, arrested by the police force on charges of endangering Konoha's public safety.
Among the crowd of onlookers, the Fourth Hokage watched as the two men were dragged away, wanting to say something but unsure how to begin.
A masked silver-haired ninja sighed deeply, shaking his head helplessly as he watched his older brother being taken away.
"This idiot of a brother..."
"Gintoki-nii! Leave the dog-walking and your hopeless little brother to me! Just focus on reforming yourself in prison—don't worry about a thing!"
Obito clenched his fists, tears streaming down his face as he made his vow.
"Who are you calling a hopeless little brother?! You looking for a fight?" Kakashi instantly bristled, rolling his eyes in annoyance.
Obito ignored him completely, continuing to shout tearfully at Gintoki.
"Even though your brother has a terrible temper, a sharp tongue, and a cold, unlikable attitude—I'll endure it! I'll never give up on him!"
"Obito, you bastard, meet me at the training ground right now!"
As Kakashi and Obito started bickering, Minato and Rin exchanged exasperated glances before the latter sighed softly and stepped between them to mediate.
"Both of you, stop fighting!"
...
Jiraiya couldn't comprehend how, in just three days, Gintoki had managed to turn Konoha Prison's most hardened criminals into obedient lackeys.
Watching as the vicious inmates affectionately called Gintoki "boss" one after another, Jiraiya could only stand there in disbelief.
This kid… is no joke!
The fines and reparations for damaging Konoha's public safety and infrastructure were ultimately shouldered by Orochimaru alone.
For one of the Legendary Sannin, this amount was mere pocket change—barely equivalent to an A-rank mission's payout—and hardly worth a second thought.
Considering the trio's cooperative attitude during the investigation, their final sentence was limited to paying the fines, covering the damages, and a one-week in prison.
Prison Life: Day Six…
Lunchtime in the prison cafeteria.
Jiraiya watched, utterly speechless, as inmates who had been ruthless and menacing just days ago now groveled at Gintoki's side, massaging his shoulders and catering to his every whim.
The former prison boss—a hulking brute who looked every bit the hardened criminal—approached Gintoki with an ingratiating smile, holding out a piece of cake.
"Boss! I've gathered all the dessert cakes for today! Open wide, say 'ahh—'"
BAM!!
Without so much as a glance, Gintoki slammed the so-called boss's head into the table with enough force to shatter it completely, then spoke in a bored tone.
"Why must a happy dessert time turn into this hellish scene? Want me to kill you?"
"My deepest apologies, Boss! Then… how about a maid-service approach?!"
"That's even worse! Just imagining it kills my appetite!"
"Well, if you've lost your appetite, then I, the Gallant Sage, will gladly—"
Jiraiya reached for a cake from the plate in front of Gintoki, only to freeze as he felt the murderous glares of the inmates standing behind him.
He had no doubt—if his hand moved even a centimeter closer, those prisoners would swarm him in an instant.
Not wanting to stir up trouble, Jiraiya ultimately gave up.
He certainly didn't want to risk getting his sentence extended for causing a scene—he still wanted to get out as soon as possible to gather material for his next book!
Grumbling, Jiraiya withdrew his hand and picked up his fork, about to stab into his cake—only to suddenly realize that the cake he had just received had mysteriously vanished!
"What're you looking at, old man?"
Behind Gintoki, a prisoner holding a piece of cake in both hands glared down coldly at Jiraiya, who was frantically searching for his missing dessert.
"All the cake belongs to the boss!"
Jiraiya: …