Chapter 7
Back at school with his phone, Chen Jiahao received a call from Zhang Wei, telling him to bring food back to the dorm.
Chen Jiahao returned to the dorm with three servings of food. When he set them on the table, Zhang Wei and Zhang Jiaqiang's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.
"Third Bro, what kind of crazy stunt are you pulling?"
The three of them usually ate cheap boxed meals from the cafeteria, and Chen Jiahao was the most frugal of all. To save money for Tian Tian's birthday present, he would have been content eating pickled vegetables with steamed buns for all three meals.
Braised pork in soy sauce, hand torn braised chicken, pork belly with preserved mustard greens, braised pork intestines, and three boxes of rice.
For poor university students, this was the equivalent of eating out at a fancy restaurant.
"You two have been taking care of me these past few days, so this is a little treat for you."
After using his Infinite Money to pay for the iPhone 16, he had paid off his online loans and credit card with his 10,000 yuan in savings, leaving him with a little over 2,000. Being debt-free felt great, and he figured he deserved a treat himself.
"Thanks, Dad!!"
"Godfather, I love you! The last time I had braised pork intestines was half a year ago."
The three starving wolves devoured the food like a whirlwind. After they finished, each went off to play their own games, while Chen Jiahao happily admired his new iPhone.
His two roommates scoffed at this classic "simp" behavior, but knowing Chen Jiahao was a lost cause, they couldn't be bothered to try and talk him out of it.
"Third Bro, Third Bro! You're trending on the campus network's hot search!"
Just before lights out, Zhang Jiaqiang suddenly yelled, staring at his phone. "Quick, look! The WeChat groups are blowing up too."
Chen Jiahao froze. He quickly opened his phone and saw the title of the top post on the campus network's hot search: "A clueless simp who desperately needs a reality check."
He clicked on it and saw photos taken by the instigator, capturing the exact moment he was trying to get Zhao Yuxin's WeChat.
In the photos, Zhao Yuxin looked as glamorous and charming as ever. With her as a contrast, Chen Jiahao looked unspeakably uncouth, radiating an aura of poverty from head to toe.
The various university WeChat groups were also exploding, all discussing the incident, and much of the mockery was vicious.
"Fuck, isn't that that bumpkin Chen Jiahao..."
"I'm speechless. How is this any different from sexual harassment? Where did he get the nerve?"
"Probably borrowed the courage from Liang Jingru. For him to dare hit on Zhao Yuxin... it's simply outrageous."
"Exactly. This poor bastard has some inexplicable self-confidence."
"He's harassing my goddess! If everyone was as shameless and clueless as him, my goddess would be too busy just turning people down."
The Chinese Department's group chat was the most lively, since everyone knew Chen Jiahao.
Although he was just an ordinary, unremarkable guy, the double buff of being a "simp" and a "poor guy" meant that even with a low profile, he would still be noticed.
"Wait a minute, isn't Chen Jiahao Tian Tian's exclusive simp?"
"Tch, it's been three years of university. When has Sweetie ever even looked at him properly?"
"Exactly. It's all one-sided on his part. So embarrassing. The key is he has the desire but not the guts, and now he's made a huge scene."
"But this simp is supposed to be so dedicated... how could he go after Zhao Yuxin now?"
Someone immediately mocked, "If you're going to simp and end up with nothing anyway, then between Tian Tian and Zhao Yuxin, the department flower and the campus flower, the campus flower is obviously the better value."
"Haha, that's true. If you're going to get nothing either way, you might as well go for the better one."
"He's ambitious, has goals. Our classmate Chen Jiahao is making progress."
Suddenly, Tian Tian spoke in the group: "He and I are just classmates. There's no need for everyone to talk like this."
The previously lively chat instantly fell silent after Tian Tian's message. Her tone was polite, but her anger was palpable.
In the girls' dormitory, Tian Tian put down her phone, her beautiful face clouded over.
Her bestie, Lin Xiaomeng, said indignantly, "Those people are going too far. Sweetie, you're way prettier than Zhao Yuxin. What nonsense are they spouting?"
Lin Xiaomeng was also a class-beauty level pretty girl, petite and very cute.
But next to Tian Tian, she was still a bit outshone. In her pajamas, Tian Tian looked serene and beautiful, with a scholarly air, worthy of being the number one beauty of the Central Department.
Hearing this, Tian Tian's expression softened a little. She said calmly, "Xiaomeng, I'm fine. I don't let things like this get to me."
Lin Xiaomeng continued, "But they've gone too far. They know perfectly well that Chen Jiahao is a useless simp and a poor guy, yet they still had to use you to make jokes."
Tian Tian, however, said with curiosity, "But they're right, though. Where did that poor guy Chen Jiahao get the guts to hit on Zhao Yuxin?"
Just as they were talking, her phone rang.
"Speak of the devil, and he shall appear," Lin Xiaomeng said with disgust.
Tian Tian glanced at the screen and answered the phone, saying a soft, "Hello?"
"Tian Tian, don't believe all that nonsense in the groups and online..."
Tian Tian frowned and said, "Classmate Chen Jiahao, we're not that close. You should call me Classmate Yu."
"Right, right, Classmate Yu, just hear me out."
"It was all a misunderstanding. You're the only one I like."
"We were playing Truth or Dare. I lost, and they dared me to go hit on Zhao Yuxin."
"In my heart, not even a hundred, or a thousand, Zhao Yuxins could compare to you..."
This confession, dripping with simp energy, was so cringeworthy it made one's scalp crawl. Lin Xiaomeng, watching from the side, made a theatrical gagging motion.
But Tian Tian's mood improved considerably after hearing it. She said with a hint of sarcasm, "I see. So that's where you got the courage to hit on Zhao Yuxin."
"Classmate Yu, just believe me. Believe me, you're the one I like the most."
"Tomorrow is your birthday. I've prepared a gift for you."
Tian Tian said impatiently, "Alright, that's enough. We have nothing to do with each other, so there's no need to explain anything to me."
With that, she hung up the phone directly.
Lin Xiaomeng asked from the side, "Sweetie, aren't you going to ask what gift he's planning to give you?"