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These days, while Wiz's Magic Item Shop is becoming famous as a soft serve ice cream shop whose profits are being squandered due to its incompetent owner, I was reunited with a familiar face at the guild.
"Kazuma-sama. It's been a while."
"You're the Bishop's grandfather who first lent me money. Thank you for your help then."
"At that time, you were just a novice adventurer, but who would have thought that you would go on to defeat the Demon King and become a world hero? Perhaps this was Lady Eris's will."
"Well, I didn't think this would happen either."
The Bishop of Ellis Church has wanted to talk to me for a long time. The reason is
"By the way, Kazuma-sama, do you have any personal relationship with Eris-sama?"
It was a huge landmine. Eh? I had humiliated the Goddess to the best of my ability, but I was executed after all? It was consensual, so isn't that okay?!
"Wh, why would you do that? You're dealing with a goddess, you know?"
"The truth is, a very small number of us heard a prophecy. However, given its content, we thought it couldn't possibly be a prophecy, but seeing as how Lady Eris has bestowed divine protection on your business, perhaps it's not entirely impossible..."
Oops, what was Lady Eris spouting off?
"By the way, can I ask what it is about?"
"That's right. A few days ago, late at night, you said you wanted to be united with Kazuma-sama. You wanted him to shower you with love. You were saying things like that, like a dreamy girl."
"Well, if that's Lady Eris's will, I'd be honored, but I'm no match for her."
She escapes with a noncommittal answer. Lady Eris is surprisingly useless.
"Eris-sama had shed tears many times thinking about the people suffering at the hands of the Demon King's army. It was Kazuma-sama who put an end to that sadness."
The bishop looked at me with a deep emotion on his face. Please stop. Don't look at me like that, I've done so many horrible things to the goddess.
"I think that Lady Eris deserves to be happy too. Kazuma, would you please convert to the Eris religion? So that Lady Eris's voice can reach you."
"Ah yes."
Carried away by feelings of guilt and the difficult atmosphere of refusing, I converted to the Eris religion.
______________________________________
That night
"...I want to disappear."
"Isn't it good that only the bishop accepted it?"
I called Chris to the mansion and we talked about what had happened that day.
"What is the reason for limiting who can receive it?"
"Is it the difference between faith and trust?"
Chris's expression clouded over. Did he step on a landmine?
"As long as the bishop is a legitimate job, there are conflicts of interest. There are only a limited number of people who will prioritize their faith over their own desires and interests."
"Is that how it is... If that's the case, does that mean I believe in Eris more than anyone else? I don't need any vested interests."
"Kazuma...are you doing this on purpose?"
Chris blushes. He said he trusted her unconditionally, but is it really something to be embarrassed about?
"I trust Eris more than any other priest, and I cherish her. Isn't that obvious? She's my companion now, and one day I'll take her as my wife. That's proof of my trust."
"Yeah...Thanks Kazuma."
Oh, it seems like we're in a pretty good mood, but the truth is, things aren't going so well.
"Enemy detected."
The two of them activate the skill.
"Yes, there is."
"There he is."
Ever since that harem declaration, someone has always been listening to make sure no one is being overtaken. Incidentally, Chris also joins in from time to time, so you can't really blame him.
"I knew it, but everyone loves Kazuma."
"I'd like to ask for a break just for now."
"Oh well. I'm going back to my room, okay?"
"Ah, can I become a little bit like Eris?"
I grabbed Chris' hand and whispered a request.
"Uh, yeah."
A light enveloped Chris' body for just a moment, and the usual divine form of Lady Eris appeared. No, I wonder what's going on with that transformation skill.
"Is this okay?"
As expected, Lady Eris is cute. Chris is cute too, but her style is a little different. While thinking about such unnecessary things, I fulfilled my promise.
"I made the right choice. So there's no problem, right?"
"Huh? What's wrong... Huh?!"
I stole Eris's lips. As promised, I made a choice I wouldn't regret, so I won't let her complain about this kiss. Well, I'd cry if she'd said no, though.
"I will never regret it."
"Yes, if you truly desire me, Kazuma..."
"It's a shame that something got in the way and we couldn't continue..."
Even I don't want to eavesdrop on someone's first experience.
"Um, why don't you come to my room tonight after everyone's asleep?"
"Won't Darkness next to me find out?"
"Um, no... in my room..."
Hmm? Is this the goddess's room?
"After defeating the Demon Lord, you registered at the teleportation point, right?"
"Eh? Is the room with those two chairs Lady Eris's room?"
Isn't this taking simplicity to the extreme?
"No, I can get to my room from there. There's no chance of the message being leaked..."
"I understand. I'm going to take another bath."
"Y-yes..."
Eris blushes at the harsh word "bath." Even in front of the door, she remains the same Eris.
"Please be a proper Chris, okay?"
"Oh, that was a close call..."
As we head out the door together, I warn her. She's a surprisingly dangerous goddess.
"Oh, are you going out?"
When I opened the door, Megumin was there. She had been listening in near the door just a moment ago...
"I'm just going back to my room."
"I'm just going to take a bath."
It was just a normal conversation. Chris's face was a little red and mine looked nervous, but everything else was normal.
"Huh? Wasn't Kazuma taking a bath earlier?"
"Oh, I was just thinking of giving it a thorough wash."
"Huh?! Hey Chris! Excuse me!"
Megumin seemed to be sniffing it a bit, certain that it was Chris's clothing.
"Chris, did Kazuma do something to you?!"
"No!"
Megumin is looking at me suspiciously. She seems to be pondering when she hears me say that I'm going to take a second bath.
"Do you have any plans with anyone after this, Chris?"
"No?"
These words caused Megumin to think about something...
"Kazuma, please leave now! I'm going in too!"
"Oh, yeah."
It seems I misunderstood something.
-----
"Kazuma has purified his body twice...which means the final battle will be tonight."
"No hard feelings! It's a special night for Kazuma and me!"
"Chris isn't here, is that okay?"
The three of them are gathered in the living room as usual, and I sense something from Megumin's behavior, so I use my stealth skill to keep an eye on them.
"Chris doesn't have any appointments tonight. I heard about it! If there are any suspicious noises coming from Chris's room, I'll come and help!"
"Megumin is a pretty unpleasant woman..."
"I'm not sure if that's even possible..."
Sorry guys, I'm not going to your room. I'll lock myself in.
"Teleport"